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1I shut my eyes in order to see " Paul Gauguin. "Anyone who sees and paints a sky green and pastures blue ought to be castrated. " Adolf Hitler. "Buy old masters. They fetch a mucli bet- ter price than old mistresses. " Lord Beaverbrook. THE WACKY WORLD 0F ART The late cartoonist AI Capp defined modern art as a product of the untalented, sold by the unprincipled te the utterly bewildered. Statements such as these would immediately disqualify any world-leading cartoonist as an artist (or a huinan being even) among the artsy shmartsy elite in-group of artists. What is or isn't art and who is or isn't an artist today, are questions that may only be answered fromn on high, from "le monde", from, as Tom Wolfe put it, "the milieu of those who find it important to be in fashion, the orbit of those aristocrats, wealthy bourgeois... impresarios... .the glamorous but small world of the smart set." So yours truly would agree with AI Capp that le monde of art is filled with the untalented, the unprincipled, and the utterly bewildered. Corne to think of iL, I would add that this "le mon- de" is aiso filled with self-deceived hypocrites, and self-serving charlatans. "Le monde" has bewildered and alienated rnost of the people frorn modemn art. "Le monde" lias even alienated a large portion of the professional artists (like myself). Not that I subscribe to the notions held by the less intiated, that ail art should le instantly enjoyable and understandable to the most ignorant without requiring any effort on their part, or that "the guy's ive-year-old daugliter can paint stuff just as good as the junk Picasso puts out". There is, after aIl, some truth in that statement by Leo Steinberg when he said, "If a work of art or a new style disturbs you, then it is probably good work. If you hate it, it is probably great". Art like the English language is progressively better under- stood and enjoyed the more one works at it, and its beauty demands an infinite vursuit. Nonetheless, some of the bullshipping critiques that are couched i arcane language by some of the modemn art crickets, can only be fuily appreciated by psychos. Try yourself on this easy one by Georges Braque (the father of Cubism): "The aim is not to reconstitute an aciecdotai fact but to con- stitute a pictorial fact". Too easy? Aliglit then, try Frank Stella (of the Minimal Art movement): "My painting is based on the fact that only what can be seen there is there. It really is an object ... what you see is what you see". Got that? Mind you some of the misconceptions that the average Joe lias about art and artists are pretty nutty also. One of our neighbors who is a bit of a "Philistine" (the artist's name for people whose taste is entirely in their mouffi), (let's cail hlm Phil for short) has a few over-priced production-line "originais" hanging ini lis house and they are very "kitsch" (the kind of art that oniy a Philistine couid stornach). Just the same, Phil likes to criticize my work. Phil thinks rny paintings must ail have beeni executed under the affluence of incohol. "Why would any sober person want to paint two blue-colored horses with one hiding behind the other?! " groaned Phil. So I toid him that the an- swer lies in counting their legs. Ten minutes later Phil figured it out!l Seven ]Legs were flot the rîght numnber for two horses, lie decided, so he went telling the neighborhood about one of the paintings that crazy George did; "IL discovered a stupid mistake for hlm" he tells them. "Le monde" notwithstandlng, since I arn a mem- ber of C.A.R. (Canadian Art Representation) and a member of the Toronto Arts and Letters Club, have had exhibitions of my work in Australia, Europe and Canada, have even exhibited with the famous Australian Roîf Harris in a two-man show, etc. etc., I venture to caîl myself "an artist" rightly or wrongly. As such I've tried for years to get a showing at the local, Whitby Art Gallery whose raison d'etre is ostensibly to prornote local art and artists. So far the best they cnuld do for me was to show a couple of my paintings in their Flea Market for local crafts, and that was only when I was a paid-up member!1 Admittedly, I arn not a big name and they have shown that they are far more eager to exhibit big namnes than local ones. The main way for an artist to become a big name today is for Lïm to devote and dedicate many years of lis life to dancing the "Boho Dance" for "le monde" (of whidh more later). "Le monde" and aIl its self-serving agents make Boho dancers of us all. WI-LTBY FREE PRESS. TUESDAY, J1 UNE 30, 198 1, PAGE 19 More Coming Events CONCERT The Whltby Brass Band wlll be givlng a concert at the Whitby Public Library on Juiy 9 at 7:30 p. m. The llbrary advises those wanting to a't>xtd ts event to bring their own lawnchairs. WrESTERN DAYS '"Western Days" wil be the therne of the downtown mail to be held by the Whtby Cen- tral Business District Area Improvement Board on July 25 from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. The mail will see Brock Street closed to traffic from Coibourne to Mary Streets. The event will feature entertainment by coun- try and western bands, wrist wrestllng, a best legs contest, a dance dernonstration by the Inta Leja School of Dan- ce, body painting, Andy Hathaway's balloon animais and' a mechanical bull. Other activities wil be announced at a later date. GYMNASTIC CAMP The Ajax Acro's Gymnastie Club will be holding a summer gym- nastie camp at the Ajax High Sdhool for girls aged five and over beginnlng in the last two weeks of July. Registration for this event will be heid in thé pool lobby of the LeGros Compiex, Ajax between 7 and 8 p.m. on July 1 and B. For more information cail 683-420. KIDD[E TIME Parkwood will present "Klddie Time" frorn 2 to 4 p.m. tomorrow, July 1. The event will feature clowns, penny garnes and entertalniment. Ail children under 10 years of age wll be ad- mitted free when ac- companled by an aduit. Parkwood 18 the estate of the late Col. and Mrs. R.S. McLaughlin and la iocated at 270 Simcoe Street North', Oshawa. DING-A-J.ING The Dlng-a-Llngs Band wlll e performlng on the terrace of the Parkwood Estate on July 5 frorn 2:30 te 3:30 p.m. Because ofliinted seatlng, those wlshing to attend are advlsed to rlgtheir oWn lawn- 'chairs. Parkwood is. the estate of the late 'Col. .and Mrs. R.S. McLaughlln and is located at 270 Simcoe Street North, Oshawa. 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" Ail homes have a spacious family room with ail brick log-burning corner fireplace and wet bar. .~ ~j~r 1930 sqft. The Chestnut Executive Detaehed Homes $107,700 I (O ~ I là m ~i bb b................ *,eg'*~***~"*'.~ q ~ bQ * * b b b b b ~ b b b ~ * b.................