The following text may have been generated by Optical Character Recognition, with varying degrees of accuracy. Reader beware!

: o Phase * way i Family Newspay 145 $8 PUBLISHED AT THE BAIRD & MAAS months;anduopa) ed until allarrearsare paid. ripLie 4 &teosiin NO: 80.4 WEEKLY, . . - er; eins ns rain : Hu RSDAY M 0 RNING "PARSONS, I, DE H. L. Harnden,L.D.S., Surgical and Mechanical Dentist, . Of Ten Years Experience, (OFFICE IN BIGELOW'S BLOCK, PORT PERRY, RESIDENCE- PRINCE ALBERT. Particular attention given to the | ix | of Children's Teeth coo = : Per | Mineral Teeth mounted on Gold, Silver and Vulcanized Rubber. A ------ i THE Sotee up i public. Btrict attention Comfortable Stab! public patronage. Port Perry, June 16, PRINCE A and lloge to the. comfort and oon making the Royal © '| Royal Canadian Hotel, PORT PERRY. laving leased to above Hotel, n a style in keeping with the sapidly increasing business and TOS) awit d to the Table and the Bar. and attentive Hostlers. [¢ Neither labor nor expense will be spared in he anadian Hotel a of HENRY FOY. 1869. 3 "REVERE HOUSE." MANCHESTER of the re- venience of the BERT, ONT., THURSDAY, SEPT. The. Disguised Heiress. Miss Vernon sat at her window, plunged in deep thought, She was an heiress, Preposseseing in appearance, snd as natural, bad suitors plenty, Among them she made choice of William Winsor, and in a fow weeks ihey were to be married. William was engaged in 'the wholesale clothing business, and had the Teputation of a sharp, active man of business. Nothing 10 his prejudice had come-ia the ears of Miss Vernon unnl the day before. A poor woman had come to the door in evident poverty, and asked for relief. Ou being questioned she said ehe had been employed in making shirts at twelve cents apiece for wholesale dealers ; that, alter making a dozen and carrying them to the store, she had: been roughly told that they were. spoiled, and ; B. PLANK,.......,PROPRIETOR. |} hing 'would bs peid : money, when addressed to : i that nothing wo paid for her work, or Storey 0. wil IDC wt ones eh aaeeh ied with Gud %0 as. to preserve AVING purchased the above hotel, anc.hus at that sis might have sone more 1 +h wie a »OF ADVERTISING, Nitrous' Oxide Gass. admiuidersd for the | asd urls ha Bar with the Fholgest Hotiors [Woule agree ta fi them beiter. Bhar ud- For each line, first Ingortion cuss Tess extraction of Teeth. i Sager und fo hy al dally, Be ded that'this was one of the smull ,ways in Subsequent insertions, per line......... 002 Consultation free ard all work: d. [ostlersalways in attendance. 8 | Which the firm made money out of" poor Cards, under 6 lines, per annum...... 5 00 Sept. 7.1870, 36-1y -- eee worben, by pretending that. work was un- . dinN il and . : Mackie's Hotel, satisfactorily done, when really uo fault ' accordingtothe space they occupy. « Alvertise s received for publication, with; oul! a maituctions, will han ed 1oen diugly. TN 1d 'butuntil paid for. Alibers! liscoyntallowedioMerc! whoadvertiscby the yearorhalf-yea! here te ie gm sh alinbrOnts n necessity ity. advocating ight and condemn wrong, it fh take the lead in forward I the generalinterestgof t © county ;and in the amos eflocaland gener: we wsgiven, wil saydocul paper pyblishedin Canada. - Wy Cireslais, Business Cards, Ball Car aL, insegled until forbid, an Risgmens willbe taken hante and others i. {upset cris willis afl cases be srictlya ie ingreasing importance of theNorih ETE oA Ibe unsurpassedby wild 0B DEPARTMENT. s. Hand Bills.Posters. Programmes. Bil! leads, Blank Forms, Receipt Books Check Books: &e , &c., of ul JMsuvanee, | "THE ONTARIO FARMERS' Mutual Insurance Company. ---- S Oompany is now fully organized and is pre] 10 accept risks on Farm Buildings and their contents, country School Houses and 'Churches. Those wishing to insure and t support a Home Insurance. Company have now an opportunity of doing so either by ap) lying to the Head Office, or to any of the focal Aeents of the Company. Our rates will be found as low as those of any responsibleMutual Insurance Company in Canada. Head Office--The old Registry 'Office Build- ings Brock Street, Whitby. F ing ing tnt Late WALTON NTREET,' PORT HOPE Wn. Jewett RENT STR to the g BRODIE'S,) MACKIE, Proprietor. 's Hotel, EET, LINDSAY, Good stable and shed attached, and an attentive ostler always in attendance. Free Omnibus to and from the Cars and Boats. rere pe kee feet eit rt itp rpten DAFOE ur HOUSE ICA 00D accommdations. Careful attention uirements of travelers and guests. bar supplied with the could be reasonably lound with Jit, "Onlya doltar and forty cents for # woek's work I" exclaimad Miss Vernon in dismay. ¢ That's all,' said the poor woman. ¢ How, then, do you live?' ¢ lt can't hardly be called, living, It's just keeping body and soul together," sail the poor woman. ¢ And who is the extortioner that offers you starvation wages and then defrands You of even them ?* asked Miss Vernon indig- nandy. ¢ William Winsor.' ¢ Who?' demanded Miss Vernon quickly. jor William Winsor," ¢ Lcan hardly believe this, 1 kpow the ® "It is true, and if you investigate the matter you will find it 10 be so.' «I wii luvestignte the matter. Here ata five dollars for your present needs. Come hy at this time and 1 may have some work for you to do.' The poor woman departed, blecsing upon ihe youug heiress. ¢1 will look into this,' said Margaret and Jf it proves true, the engagement between William Winsor and , invoking a best wines, liquors and mao em mare |)" Tu: FAIRBANKS, Jung | Thebarssppiot wis Se ; Partiesfrom ndisianeegotting hand bills, &e. printed | 2 171¥, ' . Secretary i . . J. DAFOE, Proprietor. gentleman, etn have (ign done Yo ake home withthem. r - osm | weswons | WESTERN ASSURANCE COMPY| Oemtre Hotel, oe } op » SAINTFIELD, Professional Sarvs. TORONTO, C. 'W JAS. OAMERON, Proprietor. | five - . o - r Pr. Brathwaite, INCORSORATED Albion Hotel, od "PRINCE ALBERT, FR 1 1 3 W oo WHITBY. an Physician, Surgeon, and Accoucheur. | Capital - = $400,000 : y : FRORONER Tor iby Com HON. SOI MeMURRICHS | io ud Ses Sted ith low 15 Uo cova: | wr evolutly, {CORONER for the County of Ontario, Naas ATH, Era. | fort and convenience of the traveling public.-- \f shall be by y _/ Physician, and Accoucheur, ary ES PRINGLE E%- | Brery attention will be paid to the and | myself sha roken." Prince Albert , Toron diseases of Ss hest, cl Yison & Petitt's Drug store, Port Perry, R. JONES, M. D., CORONER PHYSICIAN, SURGEON, &C. & Peuit's Drug Store, Port Perry. Drs, McGILL & RAE, WM. M'GILL, MX. D. FRANCIS RAR, M. SAMUEL H. COCHRANE, LL.D, li, WILSON, . Silling, Boosh st. g LYMAN ENGLISH, L. L. B,, sireet, opposite this pos G. YOUNG SMITH, LL. B, &c. Office in the Victor! Whithy. ! Lic, &e., &c by, Onsasie. OC a wa $l "BR. C. E. MARTIY, RADUATE of Victoria Ooll G Drovinels] Licentiate uate of -Medieal ollege ; of the New Ls "and Ear Infirmary in General and 1 and special graduate for New York. Office at Al- FOR THE COUNTY OF ONTARIO; FFICE aud Residence--over Allison HYSICIANS, 8 , &c., &¢. Office and AN Jurscons, Orhowa, sa RRISTER, County Crown _ Attorney Soliris Chaneey, Notary Public, &e., street, Whitby. i it Bisa R. J. ARRISTER, Attorney at Law, Solicitor OLICITOR in Chancery, Attorney, Conveyancer, &c., Pohava, Office--Simcoe > 13 Azzisrae, Attorney-at-Law, Solicitor in Chancery, and Insolvency, Notary Pub Office--MeMillan's Block, Brock Street, Whit- JAMES PRINGLE, GENERAL Aden. . Auctioweers, or hee Major & Willcox, to LICENSED AUCTIONEERS FOR THE COUNTY OF ONTARIO. Valuators, Land Agents, on Merchants, &c. ACCOUNTS COLLECTED PROMPTLY. Money to Loan at 8 per cent. E. MAJOR, W. M. WILLCOX, BoRreLIA. PriNcE ALBERT. Sept. 29, 1870. ; 39 Wm. Gordon Licensed Auctioneer, Valuator, ; &e,, &o., 5 Fo umineih on fe me mi given " Parties entrusting their Sdles to ET ED ura tention being WM. GORDON, Sunderland P.0., Brock. ATTENTION. ia A 3-1 i. JC. PILKEY, - ' : Bone AgENT. 1000 pd in! wie °88 -- a sinh H., Nal Bs £3 J TCENSED Auctioneer for the Town k, Thorah, & Aprpdy ady nod $ have charge of 8 hitby, 20th June, 1867. Dr. Thorn begs to ai pared to the most skillful ders left at t & Pettet, will receive Port Perry, July 21, New A WAT e . Issued by ty of J an'y fat, 1870 uo if ; ave apt wid dG r, while obliging and atientive hostlers will the stables. 1870, 28 OHAS THORN, VS, MBER of the Veterinary Institute, Chica- 80, 111, Gold Medalist for the beet exatat on Horse Practice. Author ofa First Piivs Essay on Shoeing. Graduated Sept. 1 tL exam! ua nnounce that he has taken his residence at Port Perry. and is now pre- treat all cases entrusted to his care. in d scientific manner. Medical All or- Hall of Messrs. Allison prompt attention. 5 The Veterinary Stables may be found on Lilly street, opposite Cossitt's Factory. 1811. 30 JEWELRY ESTA BLISHMENT, i PRINCE ALBERT. pr e@ lee Great Inducements ?!} rrivals of JEWELRY, CLOCKS, and CHES 1! Will be sold Very Cheap! CAMERON & MACDONELL I Considerable Reduction in Price! * JYARRISTERS and Attorneys at. Law,| The undersifued would tegpecifully Sell sto For One Month Only, Bi: ouse. Pountg ouucll Outasio. Offions: Ancloneer that he Is prepared gitend sales tAnd for Cash Only, * G. SAMBRON. " Lm des or Blak Ro Yaad Sa ah pe Mat = ax ni : yiiel JAM 3 ?¥ J constantly on . 5 . ; ot A TTO FEY at Law, Bo loiter Agent 3 ae ovag fice? i" baminntat John Diesfeld 8, lane place Office Over Armstrong's Hotel, Main | ented Jane, 1871. Liter: vl] : a Hn al wa Ease ed of PRINCE ALBERT. EE, . | Seqring Machines who bays, Prince Alber, Ang. 81, 1871. | olicitor h- d Pablio; Oshawa chase emule Tahir ha ou 2h Rave j ost Office 5: the best machine for $30. All Machines war Feeter's Block, dppo- | os oa 5a, | Ordersiattended to'on the shortest notice. Marriage J Licenses ! Authority. re . MAJOR | wi ou 1 ~ 5 ham «Wt nav petro dork t-Some- ¢ Nancy,' eaid Miss Version ihe nest morning to the chambermaid, + have you 49 old dress and shabby clouk and bonnet that you can lend me 7° * I'have got some that are so poor that 1 am nol going to wear them again,' said Nancy, surprised at such an enquiry. ¢ Will you lend them to me 7" ¢ Of course, miss, but what would the likes of you wantof such old. ¢lothes 7° ¢ A linlg fun, that's all,' said Miss Ver- non. ¢U'm going to disguise myself, and 8, | ree if I can'uleceive somebody. With this explanation Nancy was content, and produced the clothes. Miss Vernon put them on, and in addition borrowed of another of the servants a thick green veil, somewhat the worse for wear, and then set out on her miesion. No ove in her disguise would have recognized the usually elegantly dressed] heiress, Miss Vernon. Miss Vernon slipped ont of the ibisement door and took her way ww a large store, on which was inscribed the name of William Winsar in large gilt letiers. She entered, and after a while a clerk | spoke to her in a rough voice, -- ¢ Well, what do you want 2 ¢ I want to get some work,' she said in a low voice, ¢ We can give you some shirts.' ¢ Anything.' 5 ¢ Can you rewiwell 2° ¢ I think eo." A half-dogen shirte were given to Miss Vernon; and she was informed that if sat- isfactorily done, she would be paid twelve cents apiece. These abe carned home, slipping in at the back door. Two hours later the poor woman called. | ¢ Here are some shirts for you to make," said Miss Vernon. 4 ¢ Why, they arg of the, same kind as I have been waking,' said. the woman in surprise. | 8 « ! ¢ That is true, and they! came froin the A i # 4 ¢ Am 1 to bring thém back there 1" _ ¢No, you will bring them here. pay for the work when done, double A orice you have been receiving,' : ¢ Thank you, Mies, you are very kind. 4 Sew them as neatly as possible. I wish to see whether they will be rejected as poor work.' . : I will the $ Yea, Misa Vernon, I will , take pains olds ot Ds goilby with them,' dri Three days later the poor woinan.returned with: the orm pip' Mire paid her for them; andirequested her to call again themextiduys ii 1. ai ¢ Nanoy," e'heiross, after' her pro- | tege' lind 'Weparted, old alothes 'again.' Hae ty sb His J ide § nat &shamed you ateto appear in such, ¢ No one will know me, Nancy. WN mel ed B* Not long a ins Vernon, | shabby. disguise, entered the esiablishment of Willman Won "with iis 1 bundle of | shirts. her aim. She went to ies 'them down. roi ar worky air). sai Mice) Vrnow'a 2 litle vnpleasaniness ¥1 wish to bortew "your |. re ff Ga # You are from fie contr! . WP ids datidy young' { 13 ain gL pad IN " ait i |.+¢ Cartaloly, mies," satd Vasey S34 LJ SEE 28 1871 « Shocking! shoéking I" he said. ¢ What's the matter, sir 2% + +. They are wretchedly owed, - . That's what's the matter. low do you ag Tavs we are going to sell ench shirte as' these ?* ¢ Fam sure I' thought they were 'well done," said Miss Vernon. ¥ ¢ You, thought, did you 7' repeated the clerk, mocking her, ¢ Well, I think diff- eréntly, and that's all aboot it. We shan" pay you tor thest shirts. They will have to be sald pt a loss ? : ¢ But what shall I do 2' asked Miss Ver- ron in seeming distress. ¢ That's your business, not mine. will ty you once more and @+ve you another half Jozen shirts. If they are done better you will be paid [or them.' z Ta the indignation of the clerk, who was not used to such independence in women' who worked for _ establishmont, 'Muss 'Verudi wk ek 10 another par of the counter, where $he saw William Winsor himself. . ¢ Mr. Wineor,? the said, ¢ your clerk will nol pay "me for Ihkse shirts, he says they ore not WER dose. oon a Mr. Winsor took up one and pretended fo examine it. ¢ No, it & poorly done. We cant pay you for these, but you may have ariother bundle, and if they ure satisfactory you will be paid." ¢ Didn't I tell you so," sniil the clerk triumphantly. ¢ Now, how much did you make by that operation ?' ¢ More than you think, perhaps,' said Miss Vernon quietly. ¢ Do you want any more work P' ¢ No, I dont wish any,' she said coldly. «#0! you are on your ligh horse, ate you ? Well, you may be glad to get work some day, when you ean't have it." . The evening was one wihiich Wiliam usually spent with Isis, betrothed. When he was announced, he went forward warm- ly, as usval, to greet Miss Vernon. She drew back coldly, and did not offer her hand 10 grasp his. ¢ What is the matter, Margaret 2" he asked, surprised and startled. ¢ My hand has taken youre for the last time, Mr. Winsor," said Margaret. ¢ Goodness ! what is the: meaning of all this ? I canpot understand jn.' | ¢1 cannot take the band of one who grows rich by defrauding poot women ont of their scanty earnings. ¢ Who sage thisof me ! Some one has been slendeting me: Confirrot me with my afi " We 'accuser. There is some mistake here.' '1 will do as you desite. Wail five minutes.' : ' Mine Vernon left the recom snd soon re- tuened in ber disguise. The young man strode up to her angrily. ¢ Are you the one who has slandered me to Miss Vernon 7 he demanded. «1 told her the truth,' The young man reflected. Violent con- tradiction,' he saw, would pot avail him; he would try another coutee. ¢ Hark you,' he said, in a low voice.-- There 1s @ mistake. | will make it op to you richly--I will give you ten dollars on the spot and all the work you wantar double rates if you will' tell Miss Vernon it was a mistake.' ¢ Too late, Mr Winsor,' said the veiled figure, throwing up her veil and showing Whe contemptuous face of. Margaret Vernon. ¢ Your bribe is offered in vain, Good evening, sir. Confused and astonished, William Winsor found his way 10 the door, and has never ventured to enter the house of the heiress since. : rer ener ies A common style of announcement among fashionable snobs now-a-days is, " Mr. and Mr. Greenback have just returned from their svinmer aojurn in their hundred thou- sand dollar villa on the Hudson, 1g heir own hundred thousand mansion in town, and yesterday djove through Central Park in their three thousand dollar darriage."" et ne An English writer advises young wo- |? men to look favorably upon those engages! in agricultural pursuite, assigning as one reason that their 'mother Evé harried a wardener." He forgot 10 add that jn conse- quence of the matoh the gardener lost his situation. ' | rrr re rem A Lonjeville reporter, in describing a which _recently ec- curred in that Igo oufe shat a boy ¢grab- "bed a water bucket; arressed his step | father's head with it so. assiduously, that ike old man at once laid down to happy unconsciousness.' tl Wy ' A gentleman in Essex onlled on a shoe dealer a few days sinca, and pprebased a pair pf shove for his boy. " took the shoes for the ur the pegs inside, when thie purchaser's ed. ¢ Because,' said he, if lie or} are oat oft the boy rune alluver town, and the oy oi He teens orev , are ou nat, keellor 'to a Quaker who had given him i ih Aerial alves.' ¢ » one 10 leave the etter prbsent fo thy g Tira! Mies tiomely dressed hs ask HE. LEARNS WISDOM FROM A PRETTY Wo- ver of the city, whose name is 'bt Smith, and. whose briefs had been: like angel's visit'a, wae el office a richly dressed lady, sunouuced her desire to employ him' professionally. -- With-a' beaming 'siiite, hr ly testruined fram bursting into a full: blown laugh, the young Blacksione handed the lady a cushioned arm-chair, and assur- ed her that he was ¢ entirely and devotedly at her service." ; chair, the lady ungloved a small white haad, literally glistening with diamonds, and apphed a Suez-scented handkerchief the poor fo her lips, blushed, and on the faer, said: ~ pardon me, air, bul you will not betray el Youcoufiie in me withthe same 'retiancs 818 a privst Al the confessional.' fortunate in my marriage relations.' pleasure, and drawing "his chair close 10 the side of the lady, remarked : am just the man to get it for you. petlecily au fait in mavers of this kind, although I have never had a case in court, How long huve have yon been married 2? young when you entered that bliss'ul--1 mean wreiched state.' rienced school girl. placed me in the-arms of a man old enough to be my father ; but he was rich, and for two or three years--I did not 'know the difference -- husband had been tweniy years younger. But association with other married women opened my eyes, and | became wretched. I sighed for--well, for a heart that was more congenial with my own. your age now would have suited me bet- ler. I had one com(or:, at least. i rubbing his hands and twisting his incipient | fell down and oT lA Ai moustache. ¢ But your Ay will e000 | ed me a brute again because | laughed.-- terminate § I will get you a divorce, and then--? be too sal and he will never let me can help it.' maj sty -- ite glorious uncertaini naminity. rest easy.' a statement of your grievances.' You can imagine what a woman like me must suffer with such a husband." ment condition jntelerablé--neglect and all that sort of thing. few of the items band.' Cree.us.' mouney--1 want a divorce." Indy's matrimoniul infelicivies, aud again assured her that he would have no difficulty in procuring a divorce with at least $10,000 alimony, for making me so happy ?' inquired the lad : dollars, but gut of consideration for your when it is accomphshed it to $500.* no change about me now ping. Will you get 1t cashed for. me 1' all right. 1 will give you $100 for your ehopping ahd keap the check.' mittanee of $100 from his father, and hand- ed 11 over to the lady, and placing the check in his kel book bowed his client. 10 the Jopr. his good fortune, and that night dreamed of angelic clients,sensational divorce onses,and huge piles of $100 bills. ; 10 get his cheok cashed, and was thunder- struck when the. teller informed him that the name of Mr. ------ was forged ! dignant at the thought that his fair client | ail been guilty of en. base a orime ae ° | forging her huaband's name, he. hurried, 10 the atore of Mr, sw=--w--, with the intention ('of exposing the indy H astonished when Mr. that h6 was a widower and had not been blessed with a wile for more than 1éh years. |. 11: Young Blacketons wis seized with a fit of melancholy, whieh still aflecs him ; for all: his\effurte 10 "find the fair swindler have proved onavailingy: He has cume to the conclusion to have nothing to da with di» nd_ ha Lend hut another $100 bill to Ponte lis 'gave to his plient for.a bogus check. 7 HU ------ er pn eripe otros; meotiigan and am 26, y1s svage." ad mbrelta. : Peng ud pL Ha gt] 10] | favor, oon Youth wat kil wil prs --~-- se i {WHOLE NO. 714 sid L A a ------ ' A LAWYER'S FIRST DIVORCE CASE.| JENKINS GOES TO A PIO.NIO, Maria Ann recently determined to go to a picnic, « Maria Ann is my wifu-- unfortunately. She had planned it 10 gg alone, ao far an [ wes concerned on thal pienie SXeRisiny but when I heard about it [ determs of 10 ssaist. She pretended sho was very glad, but | don't believe she was, "It will do yoo good 10 get away from your work a day, poor fellow," she wid; "and we shall so much enjoy a cool morning ride on the cars, and dinner in the woodls."? On the morning of that day, Maria Ann got up at 5 o'clock. About 'three minutes later she disturbed miy slnmbers with 'come ¢ to breakfast." [told her | wasnht hungry, but it didn¥make a bu of difference, I hud to get up; I had no idea that the sus 'began busivess so early inthe marmiirg, bui there he was. + Now," said Maria Ann ¢ we must fly around; for the cats start at half-past six. Eat ull the breut fast you can for you won't get anything more before noo." ts I could not eat'afiyihing at_that 'time in the morning, and it was wdil I conld not, for ! had all I could do. There. was ice 10 be pounded to go arouna the pail of ioe cream, and the sandwiches to e cot, and [ thought I should never get the lege of the chickens fixed so that 1 could get the cover on the basket, Maria, Ana flow around and piled up the groceries for me to pack, giving directions to the girl "abont taking care of the house, and pulling on her dress all at once, There isa deal of ene, y in that womau, perhaps a trifle too much. . Al twenty minutes past six I stood on the % | front steps with a basket on one arm and aria Ann's waterproof on 1lie other, and 8 puil in each hand, and a bottle of vinegir'in my coatskirt pocket. There was a ea chair hung on me somewhere, too, bat 1 forget just where, ¢ Now,' said Maria Ann, ¢ we must un or we will not catch the train,' _* Maria Ann,' said I, ¢ that isa reasonable idea. How do you suppose 1 can run with all this freight 7° ¢ You must, you brote. Yo to tease me. If you do not the streets you will star t So I ran. A day or two a % oi ented' oung law- 'gtied by finding imo his 8 could be 4 Seating herse!Min the proflered office casting her pyes ¢ My business is very partioular--it is-- ¢ Betray you ! : Not for the world madam. 'The fact 18~1 want--I have been un- The eyes of the lawyer glistened wiih I I am "Feee- | see--you want a divorce. ¢ Nine years 7' ¢ Nine vears! you must have been ver "1. was a mere child--a foolish inexpe- A doting mother I was as happy as though my u always try Want a scene in 00.' A man of ¢ Exactly so!" exclaimed the lawyer, She drove me all the way to the depot on a brisk trot, and we got in the care 3 but neither of us could get a seat, and I couldn} eel the things down, so | stood and bald them. ¢ Maria," 1 said in winning woeents, how is this for a cool moraing ride 1? ¢ Said she, * You are a brate, Jenkins.' * Said I, « My love, you have made thet. obsei vation before.' I kept my courage up, ¢ yet [ knew there would be an hour of wrath = when we home.. While we were getting oat of ihe cars the bottle in my pocket got broke, and I had one boot hall full of vinegar all day. That kept me preity quiet, and M Amn ran off with a big-wiuskeied musis scher, and lost her fon, und wot her feet wet, and tore her dress and enjoyed herself ver much after the fashion of pro-nic-goers. thought it never would come dinner time, and Maria called me a pig because I want. ed to open our basket before the rest of the baskels were opened. At last dinner came the ¢¢ nige dinner in the woods," you know. Over three thous sand litle red ants had got into our dirner, and they were worse to pick out than fish bones. The ice cream had melted, aml there was no vinegar for the cold meat except what was in my boot, and of course , that was of no. immediate use. The musid teacher spilled a cup ol hot oi ffee on Mara®s head, and pulled the liizzles out uying to wipe off the coffee with his handkerchiel, -- Then I sat an a piece of raspberry pie, and spoiled my white pants, and cuncluded I dida't want anything | had to stand up against a tree the rest of the altern on. ~-- The day afforded considerable +sriely, com - pared 10 every-day life, bot theid were go many drawbacks that we dud not enjoy 60.much as [ might huve done. ee RI ~~ ey ee. ¢ 0 dear me !--and then--but I must not wine My husband is very rich, gota divorce if he ¢ Madame, you don't know the law--its 7-- its mag- Consider yoursell divorced and ¢ Well sir, how shall I proceed 2° ¢ Let me see --In the first place, give me ¢ That would take me a whole week. -- "Yes, yes--ecruel and barbarous. treat- I will just jot down a Your name 18 --? * Mis. --, You must know my hus- ¢ What, the merchant? He's rich as ¢ Yes he's rich ; but I don't care for his The lawyer wrote down a sketch of the ¢ How much are you going to charge Wel, I ought to charge you a thousand ge | will take a of $100 and you will increase ¢ That is extremely reasonable, | have 0, yes here is check my husband gave me to go shop- | will only want hatf of it to-day. Anzcpore oF Dr. SMOLLETT.-- A com- panion of Smotleit's, who was apprenticed to a surgeon in Glasgow, having been ens gaged in a frolic with a falare historian ne winter's evening, was receiving a wdvere reprimand from his master tor quitting the shop. The lad having alleged in excuse that he had been stiuck by-u snowball, and had gone out in pursuit of the person wha had thtown it, was listening 10 thie taunts of his master on the improbabiliy of such a story. ¢ How fong,' said the worthy dostor with \h® confilent air of one fearless of contradiction, ¢ might 1 stand here, and such a thing not happen to me 2 The boy was complelely puzzled, when Small who sod behind the pillar of the ahd door, and heard wh.t passed, shaichied of aenowball, and quickly delivers | lis plays mate from the dilemma in which the quesy tion had placed him, by an anewer equally prompt and conclusive, i . Two Irishmen disputing about their pedy igree, suggests the beat idea of re«pecinble pedigree. ¢ My ancestor," sid one Paddy, was an invited goes to the ark I" ¢ To the devil wid yer old ark I' rejoined his omy rade, ¢ I'd hev ye 10 understand that my projebithur had a boat of his own." . TTT ee ¥ ¢ It is after.bank hours, but the check is Ng The lawyer had that day received a re @ was excessively Happy at The next morning he went 10 the bank le was ali'l more . nformed him Iweitien to his father to 10 bill to replace the HET Ee ce a + ini) Ca esmie lie ; eolacing as a 4 As Bond io that oe will oe -- 8 ore to we wile whol she into chodly a 0 a 'terme | the river--: You | find ground a: the | itom Land i atiended 1 onliege 4 yrs at| MY deur. uile sen It is estimated that the cost of the Enfo uo se would buikdangther po eal Louis recently, aod. in BE is ai of &