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Had It A man consulted a real. gstate 2 agent for a write-up of the prop- aR * erty he wanted to sed, When the A agent submitted his descriptions of the property, the owner exclaimed: "Read that again. After the sec- ond reading, the owner said: "I don't think I'll sell. I've been 4d 1at kind of place all "untib-<youw--read--that.. > didn't know 1 had 4 'Still Going Round: yl you get any surprise WY 7 birthday" - couldn't pay for it? Extravagant * "Weel, Angus," said Donald; "I (hear ye've got married?" ~~ "Ay, Donald." "An what kind of wife hae ye got? Can she cook?" "No. 1 don't think so." "No." roy 23 "Then whit can she do?" "Man, Donald, she's a- grand singer." : "Ach, mon, ve're daft," said Don- ald in disgust. "Widna a canary hac been cheaper?" ; High Finange Little Mrs. Newedde was ~ rather shy abont asking her hubby . for muQre mpn<y, but the time came hen she simply had to. Je Tack, dearest," she said at break- Ss time, "will you please lend me ji byt only give me half of it?" 0 es, darling," saic her husband, el iiled. "But why, enly half of itz" 4 2, well, don't you see, then A440 owe nie ten shillings and I'll 114 you ten shillings, so we'll be ' nat § re, won't we?" Ch 7s. = dst Just That A I PER ~~ -feceived letter from poor, dear mamma. She says she is feeling " }, BONE to FX Hin operation 1 ERE A La, ores) as necessary?" Ha ink one was nec- EY Wife. (sortowfully); "I've just © : "I sup- pone still «]. _ young man, + "Advertising," No Hoarder The banker's daughter threw her |} arms around the neck of her bride- . groom-to-be, "Oh dear," she exclaimed, "dad's "Excellent!" exclaimed the happy "Then we'll have the wedding at noon instead of two vo 0 AR "Why, dear?" "The banks close at three!" -- pear Frou. Him "I want something really nice for a present," explained the shop- per to the assistant, "For your husband, madam?" "No, from my husband," came the reply, sweetly. . . ~~ i} oH > 'Keep It Up "Now that I've told you about my past, do you want to marry me?" rh "Sure." "I suppose you'll expect me to live it down?" "No!" 'I'll expect you to live up to it." Understand. Now ' Visitor: Why is: the ,cRurch bell ringing, Sexton? : Sexton: 'Cos I he pulling this In Expectation " "What is a debtor?! "A man who owes money." "And what is a credijor?" "A 'man who thinks he's going tc get it Lack" \ 7 g Wise Going to his employer, a young man explained he was getting _mar- ried and would like an increase of pay. : "Ah," said the employer, "I sup- pose you want a little bigger fund to draw on for household ex- péises?"- ; «2 "No, sir," replied the employee. "Fhe fact is, my future wife knows - exactly what I get, so I would like >. a little extra for my own use that she doesn't know abént." Mysteribys : The young husband eyed the greyish concoction with misgiving. "- Bravely he dug a spoon into the mystery, and began to eat. After a few moments he straightened himself, eased his col- lar a little, and asked: "What do you call this, darling?" = : --"Jt's-date-pudding, -dear," beam- ed his wife, : : "Qh, yes," he breathed, "but--ér --what date?" ot The Old Vicious Circle "Well, Harry, -what . are _you doing these days?" / asked "long-absent friend. / : YA Harry replied. with a. wry smile, "Still engaged in perpetual motion." ~~ |~ "Yes, :1 make my money writing advertisements for women's wear: stores, and then my wife and daughters read the .atlvertisements Tand I have:to give them the: money so they can buy the things I ad- _yertise" «© Sy ¢ i 3. Some Do . Teacher: "When you . go down- hill you descend. Now, tell me, what do you do when you: go uphill?" xg Fat Boy: "Gasp." ~~ T 1} By C. Kessler Tw MY : B= ! I= 5 Pad os going to give us a cheque or a} present!" / 'ere rope, mister] HE the |. \ 3) { : ; This big' Dakota plane sits suspended at a precarious a iit crashed. 'Neither 'passengers. of i the plane nor - residents le on houses in Noftholt, England, where of the houses were injured. a 2 MARY STILL .INTERESTED IN. PICTURES A A Sais Despite the fact that she Jas not beén. seen on the screen for some * years, Canada's own_Mary Pickford is still Villy. interested in movies. On the occasion of:a recent trip to Eng and, Mary demon- strated her interest by visiting the set of "Great Expectations", the --movie- that is: now delighting audiences : throughout Canada. :Shé . is seen above with David Lean, director, and John Mills, who plays the part of 'Pip in the picturization\of Charles Dickens' great novel. ~ re a . RISE OF A NEW STAR ™~; Ae, - A young gentleman "of Great Expectations iis Jfoupteeh-yearsold Anthony Wager, of London, England, wlio was chosen from a field of over 700 adaptation of 3hirants Lor the, part of Young Pip in the Cineguild "Great Expectations' swhich iis now being shown initheatres across Canada. Ay.average boy, young Anthony had no previous stage or screen experience but, gave such a tremendous performance that he has already been assigned to two other pictures. He is one of the young stars being brought forward - - by J. Arthur Rank, the British cinema mogul. BR SRR Sg "What's in'A Name?" The modern; trend has reached even into the realm of that age- old fraternity -- the junkmen, says The Vancouver News-Herald. No longer may they be designated as junkmen, for at their convention in 'San 'Francisco this month they will 'be known as the 'National As- Houses ~~ * Aluminum British factories 'soon will 'be producing ah aluminum 'house every 2% minutes; 154,500. will be completed by next fall; and families can move in with their furniture five hours after the. house sections arrive on a vacant site. - John Wilmot, Minister of Supply, An expert says we must produce : |-wide_-enqugh--for "five cars to - huhian "system, cost a West Vir- Voice. of the Press . 4 How It's. Done yiis © There are two ways of acquiring old furniture, You can buy it or raise 'a family. > : > --Hamilton™ Spectator, A-Question of Shape The winning team in the cross- cut saw contest at the Royal Win- ter Fair--a couple of the boys from old®K ebbec--sliced through a 21- inch log of green maple in a min- ute and 47 seconds. It was nice going. We knocked one off. last summer in an hour and 47 min- utes. But the saw wdsn't in good shape. And neither were we! /--Ottawa Citizen, Button Collector 2 "In his thirty years in the 'minis- try, - an American preachér has built' up -a warld-famous collection "of buttons. Somehow this seems a reflection on his: congregation. 0 '--Edmonton Journal, - *_ [Surely Not. . eggs "the. way we produce aittomo-. biles." Does that mean the hens ..must go on strike periodically? : -- Brandon Sun. Wide Highways : Modern highways are the kind - smash at the same time. -- Quebec Chronicle Telegraph. ~ ~~ Costly Sneeze TA A snecze, which some would ra- ther have than their breakfast be-. cause of ; alleged benefits to the ginian' some $1,250. He lost con- . trol of his car and smashed into another. There's a, time and place. for .everything--including -benefi- cial sneezes. - -- St. Thomas Times-Journal, - How To: Make Fortune A chemist declares that 87 dif- ferent things can .be 'made from | coal. 'There's a fortune for/ some ingenious fellow .who can fnake a . decent fuel of it. of : v --= Chitin News. / " Let Her Go bd bl An English war brigé returning to the Old Country bus of dis- satisfaction with_Jife An Canada de- clared that she Avag 'homesick for. "the. sight' of an English ddnce hall and an English pub." " That /type won't be missed from this country. : : ; / --iNotthern Daily News. 1 '\Secret Is. Out A'man in Virginia is 97 and has néver consulted. a doctor. Bet he's sick of apples! = v --Peterborough Examiner. ~~ 'Only Time For (Action «Old men dwell iri the past, and ~oung men look: to 'the future, But wise men know that the present be ; It has been said that an earth. quake - wouldn't ruffle Walter (Turk) Broda--and that Isn't far prea from. the truth. 8 The happy - go = lucky Leaf net- minder, who 'was away. from . the N.HL. for two A seasons and most of a third, is back as large as life regain possession W. (Turk) Broda of the Vezina Go Trophy. "He's the only. Toronto netminder to ever win that award. J fing PRIN GEN | don, Manitoba, May 15, 1914, got his hockey start in and around that minding 'assignment thrust. upon goal or nothing. So Turk guarded the hemp. That was around 1929 and 1930, By 1933 he had made such strides that he had migrated ed Monarch juniors, He was also placed on Detroit's list and -in 1934-35 he was workout goalie for the Red Wings. Chuck Gardiner, then acclaimed as the greatest goalie in hockey, was Turk's ido! and he gave the chubby Polish "boy some pointers that helped his' play considérably. EY PEE TR In 1935-36, the hockey fates started to work for Turk. He be- came regular netminder for De- troit's minor pro team, the Olym- .pics, and it was during that sea- son that Conn Smythe invaded a-goalie- mission. Smythe was there to 'look over Earl Robertson -- but he wound up. with Broda, who. Toronto's custodian in 1936-37.and remained as 'such until: he joined the Canadian Army in the summer of 1943. -1040-41 when 'he 'won thé (Vezina Trophy in rathér dramatic fashion. The Turk seemed to be sitting that season. He had yielded only closest rival, Johnny Mowers of York, Broda had one of those nightmarish experiences. Rangers started throwing pucks, past 'him early- and" often and?¥ the .Turk {--couldn't-do_ anything to stem __ the dvalanche. Rangers won the game 8-5, and instead of having the Ve- zina Trophy tucked away, -Broda was one goal behind Mowers, with' each. having three games left. * ® 0% "game, Mowers two, 'That game, Turk held Chicago to .one "game left, Mowers 'was ahead, 98 Black Hawks, 3-0. Detroit's final game_ duel; for. they were in Beantown waiting to start their playoff se- ries with the Bruins, And that night the Bruins smote dowm the Wings, 4 to 1., . , and an ecstatic Broda left the rink as..winner of the Vezina Trophy by the dra- 'matic margin of 99 goals to 102. In addition to winning the covet- ed cup," Turk was also picked as "the ' league's all-star goalie for 1940-41, He had five shutouts that year. x RE TE ' 'and determined to - ~ Broda, who was born at Bran- section of the province." Like nine ¢ out of ten goalies, he had the met- ~ 'him. He wanted to play «defense © but he was 'too small and it was to Winnipeg to play for the fam-~' Windsor. Arena on a: scouting-for- stole the show.-The Turk became: His most successful season Was, pretty forthe netminding award. with-orily--four-games---left-to- play - 87 goals and was seven up on: his . the Detroit, Red Wings. But . . ." in the next game, played in New,' Turk yielded three godls in his : "put Johnny . ahead, with:.96 -goals against Broda's 98. In ithe next: goal, while Mowers was allowing Boston Bruins two. So with one to.99. : The Leafs' final. game :that . season was in Chicago--and Turk rose to-the challenge to blank the was not played until a couple of days. later * -- in "Boston. Mowers, with "one * game to go, still had a one-goal * edge on Broda. 'That: night 'thé: whole : Leaf team--including a. fin- *gernaik-biting Turk. -- watched «the _ | The "seesop, befers all thai 5 3 'pened, Broda had. given indication | that 'he bad become: a big league - goalie , ., for in 1938-39-he. finish- a'2.220 goals against average, yield- ing 107 -markers all told, and pro- duced eight: shutouts, In 10 plays off games that year, he kept up his stellar puck fending and was beats en only 20 times. He also came up * with another pair of shutouts to make his total 10 for th&season, After winning the 'Vezina in 1940-41, Turk kept up .his "good" work in the ensuing season. In 48 games he conceded 136 goals and and also the second all-star t goalie, *In the memorable ¢t battle with Detroit that year, proved his mettle when he steppe thé Red Wings in the sixth g of that epic series. He had «fair up' six. shutouts in league gant, ed in the playoffs. It couldn't have come at a 'more propitious time-- for the Leafs went on 'from there: to take the Stdnley Cup in 'the greatest comebackepf. all time, 8 GRE Nd ol Turk was runner;up to Mowers during the 1942-43 season, giving up 159 goals in 30 games--an ave erage of 3.018 per game. That sum- mer he went Army and 'the same year wound 'up overseas. 'He served 'in 'Eng- fand and -Holland and 'came through unscathed, his. only inju- ries emanating from sports coms- petition, Playing in a softball game, "he tore ligaments in his ankle slid- ing into third base and spent cone siderable time in the hospital. "Then, just before returning - to his mouth in as hockev game, lost several teeth. "In "England, he Division" Artillery. team which won the championship. ; In his first 10 / games, Broda _scored nine shutouts, and in an 11- game league schedule he conced: ed only two goals. : ""Broda 'is married- and' has' three daughters . . . Barbafa, Bonnie, 5 Betty. { 2 : J i worked at Conn Smythe's sand "pit 'during the past. sumer {and also. polished up. on his golf---- -- ..game, which is the . envy. of his mates. No Rural Journal Says Commnnis Enemy of Farmdys pr About Communism there is. much that Americans do_not know. We do know that Communists want to "They. hate our way of life, says The Farm Journal, Chicago. * . + Why 'they 'desiré so intensely to uproot -a system that. has.accom- plished soimuch, and why they. are willing «to work so furiously to create confusion and disturbance, are :niysteries- to .most of us." Communists persistently worm * their way into farm organizations, . push into radio- and . publishing, -'sneak into government jobs--every- where with thé same vigious -in- create and fan discontent and dis- "satisfaction. "Whatever is against a stronger United States they are for. RR En : 'The Communist takes advantage of every crack iin the ;armor of Americanism. {He is for strikes, be- cause they slow. up, production. He is for big spending because -it weakens . the nation. He agitates for ' everything, because he knows that government bungling gets ~discon- tented groups to play his game. 'He never rests. : He will even. suppdrt some things that are right," bécause 'he specializes in- fooling well-meaning honest Americans into aiding his effort -to make chaos. If you catch him at any of his tricks he screams. that you are ng to. fool thc, common people: "One thing 'Americ about Communism. Jt is a Areasoi- 'ous, enemy for Which there can be only .oné treatment. That isto recognize its ideas and acts, and 'sociation of 'Waste 'Material Deal: |-gave these facts as 'the '10,000th is the only time for action, cr n ers. - 3 "4 aluminum house was delivered. - -- Fort Erie Times-Review. od the 18-game league grind with J, stamp them down ruthlessly. " n. 9) - Ry -- " pn - ~ i REG LAR FELLERS--Strong Come:back , SE 3 Cm 08 4 SRSA Hs " > > | LOT. OF TE 5 9 'A INVENTION. ~~ bE : TH DUFFY &; : OF MAKIN A ZA XY ONEY HARTA ot ONE{/ WBALLS ; L 57 - E ka Sha Shp! 4 4 dae was.sunnér-up to 'Frank Brimsek ' into - the 'Motor City and blanke Le 2 but that was the only oné he notcn= into the Canadian - 'Canada, Turk stopped a' puck withs~ played: hockey with the 2ard Field ~ Artillery. and Tater with the 4th. a tent. Always the purpose is to vernment to take care of red-baiter and a dirty' Fascist, plot- / \§ ¥ "destroy--our--formy-of government... fw HER or red ~via