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\ Vw iy en ww 740 meeting. where one of the speak- A) a ~ rhirn "until you've lived up to our J 'The King Laughed And Forgave Him Chgrles the Besond was not a bed He Maes Monerek for noth- lng, ore was nothing he i better than a good pun and he « pive as mueh as he took. It was Charles' sense of humowr that brought the Barl of Rochester back: into favour, after he had fallen A from grace." "He was continually snubbed by she' King and his eobet- iers bit' refused Yo Hi the Court .. and bury "himself in the wountry One day he sauntéred into a gur- den where the King was en{erisin- ing. Charles did not see him and' was replying 'to sdmeoné who had . tieen praising the Roysl kindness of heart. : " "The King," said Charles, "should be the father.of his people." Quick as a flash eame the voice of Rochester rom behind him: "But surely, sire, not all of them!" . Far a moment_there was silence and Rochester's face hung in the balance. Then the King threw back his head and roared with laughter, Rochester was forgiven, ~ Charles Lamb was very fond of punhing, although, with one prise exception, his puns were not of the best. He had a verbal fight with a tax eollector whose name was Wis. ter. Describing the argument, he said: "Mis name -bs Winter but leis methods are summary!" The puns that some out, lke an astor's line, right en the ous, ase shways the best. A eertain musieien had annoyed the great Sir Arthur Sullivan by playing a wrong note. the note owing 10 the fact thet someone hed squashed a bee on the score. KE y "Then you should have played »s a bee-flat]" retorted Sullivan, It was a theatre eritic who-over--- heard that & young actress, famous for her affairs with wealthy men, -- was thinking of acespting x part a Shakespearean produstion. Some- ene asked what part she would: and the eritic retorted: "Pirst go'd- digger, I expect!" : Sydney. Smith's famous pun vas WHinfention®l. "Me was ehsiraian at ""&'s was a missionary, soon 10 go owt --to-a-eannibal-¢ountry.--"I hope you -- will agree with the natives," £ydney , Smith said. '. Flotsam was responsible for am- ether good éne. A friend of his who was a doctor, bought a large house in the country and admitted he _could_not think of a really siritable naine for it. "Why not' call it Bed- side Manor?" suggested Flotsam. At least one pun has achieved im- mortality, although the author of #t is unknown. He was referring to the . new-fangled motor-car, and sald that it divided the world into two-- the quick and the dead. SWISS PRESIDENT -- Dr. Max E. Petitpierre has been elected to succeed Ernst Nobs at the head of the Swiss Confeder- ation. The- new president, pie-. ~ tured in his office in Berne, has the formal status of prime min- ister and his period of office is one year. Dr. Petitplerre js a member of the Radical-Demo- . oretic Party, rim Ee When a. Scoutmaster asked his boys whether or. not each had done bis good deed for the day, three members admitted they hadn't, "In that case," they were told, "leave this meeting aml don't re- motto of one good-deed a day." alf an hotir later the boys re turned, dishevelled and flushed. "L did my good deed, sir," the first scout said. "I helped an old lady cross 'the street." 'Me, too," added the: second," "I helped the same old lady cross the street," "So did 1," chimed in the third member. * "Po you mean," the Scoutmaster denianded, "that it fook three of fyou to help one old lady cross the, street?" ps e The spokviman for the trio lows ered his head: : "Yes," he replied. "You see; sir, Ves | Chessemehers Assoslation in an SEE 8 SE : spread to auto sales, FARM FRONT hay ot Fairly SNAOMTS, we the news "ypought- the Ontario _afdress by Dr. M. A. Derby, Chief Merk snd Merehandising of iry Pyoduets for the Dominion partment of Agricikure. Dr. hed resently. returned from ; to the International Dairy Somgrete, held at Stockholm, and, ---witlle-ea-the-other-side-of-the-pond;-- hed vielted varlous - distributing ognires dn. the United Kingdom i EIMb- Noes nade; -- the -- Hed tes, Australas and New and . are stored. » * * Cenadian eheese hes built wp « Mvoureble reputation over thers, - eo oedd, im «x market which may well .be npested to dake more of ° ows sheese in future--but only if " the quality and prise mre O.K., and 'A we can sesure the buyers of a _sontinuity of supply. . * * 'The farm clieese industry in the United Kingdom has declined untii now it is only dbout a quarter. of Me pre-war peak. This is partly becaiee of she drift away from farms of the young folks who ordin- - "alto "because 'of the big demand for fluid milk over there. * ELL, de -- When the figures are all_in Bri- teh production of cheese for the yoar just ended is expectéd to be around 56 million pounds, or about one-half of pre-war production; and of that amount not more than ten. or fifteen per cent would be of feem production. 'o x * * * Only two types of clicese-- Cheddar and Cheshre--were 'many- fvotured in any real quantities; and these two only when surplus milk was available, So that, all in all,' domestic production was only a small part of the total British re- quirement of something like 408 million pounds. - * «0% In 1948 the United Kingdom im- posted slightly miore than 352 mil- Hon pounds of cheese, as compared with 328 million pounds during the pre-war year of 1938. Before the war consumption was nine pounds per. person, and this rose to 14 pounds during the war. Af present consumption is down to about 634 pounds, on the basis of a ration amounting to 2 ounces weekly per person, So it is easy to see that ¥ the British ever get back to 'anything like their former cheese- - eating habits, they're going to need arily would make the product, and | Fe 2 : [ ¢ oS * - --y RA ERORGALH LURE. SAAN Pay As You Drive -- The coin meter system of meeting pay- ments, used sucessfully on refrigerator and television sales, haa Lila MeCauley, above, shows how the a quarter in the meter; the gadget supplied meter plan works. Dro 1 { do} enough gas to the earburetor to keep you going for a spell. When your next quarter ls die, a loud buzzer sounds a warning. Every so often a eollector comes around for the quarters. For emergency use, four slugs a month are by ler. where--and-a large part of it. might well be from here.- - «x according to Dr. L But, Derby, need to have our attention if we are to eut in on this great poten- #al cheese. market to any vastly increased extent. * Fy age of boxes is a matter of serious soncern to the Canadian cheese trade. The headings in our cheese boxes also need attention, as many were scen. that were very rough in finish, and shqwing bark. He there are a few things that will | For one thing he found, from ' --astual inspection; that--the--break- 1 sonsiderably 'more "heat than light was generated, - the burghers of ..'Toronto, by 'a small majority, have decided' in favor of Sunday; Sports, Now, before the. . Provincial Leg- lslature gives the go-ahead signa, }t might be mildly--interesting - to speculate on just" what lovers of athletics, 'and in. what branches of thereof, will attempt to cut in "on the: promised . jackpot. : : ® * +The Whatzis I'heatre should do all right," said a friend of our the morning after the balloting, naming a certain Toronto Temple of Art where a line of show girls, very Jightly bandaged, forins the regular piece de resistance, or main dish. as we say in that dear France." + * a ey We looked at him in mild amaze- ment and inquired just where the Whatzis Theatre could possibly figure in a purely sports picture. "Simple enough," qiioth our friend. "All they got to do is stage a bout between a couple of these dime-a- it an athletic event. 'Then there'd be nothing te prevent them tossing in. their regular show for free, would there?" LE a 2 pa --F 1} psd i And maybe he has an idea thére, at that, Searching through the wel- fer of memory we seem to recall that the wrestling we ever witnessed was at a burlesque house entitled the Star . After x lot of argunient, in which * dozen' wrestlers." That would make first modern or "all-in" Theatre in that same city of Tor- - onto, more years ago. than we'd FPOTLS arg going 'to run' up against. 3 Ral * * ; «(For instance," if it's. OK 10 charge money to see a . baseball show .a telecast or movie "of 'the sante oi a similar'game, da price?) : @ . * x] One of the never-ending. chores in this sports 'writing business is . that of picking. out, for the readers' edification, the outstanding events of the year. It is a chore much like milking the cows or cleaning out the horse stable. on the farm-- you no sooner - get is -over with, than it's there to do again. - » * And it i$ a chore which we personally try to dodge, partly" through sloth and partly because there isn't much sense. in doing what so many others are. bound to do better, But for* oiice we are going to get well ahead .with the job. So here and now, fifty or so | ~weeks ahead of tlie deadline, we opine that the finest football game --United States brand, that is--of Anno Domini 1950 was the one -played on January, Second of that year out in Pasadena, California, * * a Naturally, old Futher Time may prove us to be wrong, as' the old rascal often has before. But, al- though -we have never been a great admirer of American football, if a better game than that between - the California Golden Bears and the. Ohio State Buckeyes happens to come up, we should greatly like ~--to-be-among those personally pres- those who atienipt to" control said game, why will it be sinful to AGENTS WANTED - Classified Advertising... HELP WANTED x anteed necessities; reasonable prices; ums; quality and SERVICE, perous business man by using and. sellin Familex products. tell you How.--FAMILEX, Monfreal. z La BABY CHICKS POULTRY-KEEPERS Be sure of a good healthy bunch of baby chicks this: coming season, .(iood chick€: mean good hens and moye éggs.. Place your order now and take advantake of the early order discount, All breeders ave government banded apd pulls orum-tésted..- Satisfaction. guariintesd. Write for our 1960 catalogue and prices. Monkton Poultry Farms, Monkton, Ontario, FISHER ORCHARD CHICKS Day old chicks, pulletg, and ro¢Kerels available weekly year round In: 8 leading breeds and crosses, The chicks are frst class, the vrice moderate, the stock avcredited, Write for 12- vage coloured calendar and price list, k Orchards, R.O.P. Breeders, Freeman, Ohtario. HOW WOULD you HKé to get your pullet chicks free? How? Buy chicks sired by R.O P. Approved Males from high producing familles. One dozen extra eggs per pullet will more than pay the whole cost of the chick, Protect yourself by buying R.O.P. sired chicks, Collect your, dividends in extra eggs and better meat type this fall, 'The maority of Tweddle Pure Bred Chicks are sired by R.O.P. Pedi- greed Males, Free catalogue. A{s0. Broiler chicks, Turkey Poults, Laying Pullets, Breed- ing CockKérels, Tweddle Chick Hatcheries Lim- ited, Fergus, Ontario. : PRODUCTION inheritance. That's alt you buy - in Baby Chicks--inheritance. If you get K0od eggs and meat production inheritance you get value, If you don't you get nothing----noth- ing. that. is but trouble, expense, lost efforts, wasted feed If you want extra egxs, better meat birds and at less coat of production, send for full details about Top Notch R.O.P, Bired Chicks. Also Turkeys, Broiler 'chicks and lay- ing pullets. Free Catalogue, Top Notch Chick Sales, Guelph, Ontario, BABY CHICKS from blood tested Lizh esg producing stock. . Livability guaranteed. Mixed $15.00 per 100, Pullets $28 to $20. Ten Chick Hatchery, Britannia Heights. Ontarlo, : BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES AN OFFER (0 every Inventor--List of inven. tions and ful) information sent free. The 0.. R ed Pajent Attorneys. 378 Bank Street, Ottawa. > = DYEING AND CLEANING HAVE YOU anything needs dyeing or oleAn- 'Ing? Write to us for information, . We are glad to answer your questions. Pyrat H, Parker's Dye Works Limited, 701 Yonge Street, Toroato,. Ontario. HOUSEWIVES WELCOME THE FAMILEX | MAN for the wide and varied range of suar. premi- Become & Dros: Write today and we will , 1600 Delorimligr, Fisher |- percent off for orders 8500 and over. Goddard |- [J STONHAU "| _ Solicitors Established 1890. 7 Hxperienced studied or practical farm labo Oontact Latvian en Josdad, t Relief tion, 330 Bay #t., Room 1804, 'Toronto, Ont. FARMERS, obtain farm labourers for spring. " ur, families single will be avallable for yew wh 4 "Asaocis- wanted for country house ndar work part time, -| with riding horses. 'State ages. 138--18th Bt., New Toronto, Ont. : == 5 NATURE'S HELP--Dixon's R for Rheumatic Pains, Neuritis, sands projeing ite : MUNRO'S DRUG STOR 335 Elgin, St Se @ $1.25 Express Prepaid Th E, pains: If. you cannot get rellef, 329, Transcona, Manitoba. POST'S ECZEMA SALVE 'Banish the torment and weeping skin troubles. Salve will not disappoint you' tching. scaling. burning: eczema. ache, ring. worm, pimples and athlete's foot, will respond write: Post's Eczems seem. PRICE $1.00 PER JAR 3 Sent. Post Free on- Recepit of Price POST'S REMEDIES 889 Queen St E,, Corner af Lozap Toronto BE A HAIRDRESSER . JOIN CANADA'S LEADING SCHOOL . Great Opportunity Learn Hairdressing Pleasant dignified profession, good wages thousands successful Marvel graduates - America's greatest system. Illustrated - cata 1 logue free. . Write or Call MARVEL HAIRDRESSING BCHOOLS 350 Bloor Bt, W., Toronto = 'Branches, 44 King\ St. Hamilton & 73 Rideau Street, Ottawa; ATENTS 2A 3 & Company Patemt |. 280 Bay Street. Poronto. Booklet of Information on request. ee ; PERSONAL a WHY grow aray bair? Write for my Free Folder: Box 929, Transcona, Manitoba, . SALESMAN WANTED g : : THIS? UY PHN rteason we have sucCcessfu) sa. amen > averaging y 1 9100 AND MORE A SOLID heavy 'tinned miik pail, Siled 40 Ibs. said that #féps have wifeady been taken by the Department of Agri- eulture to enforce more strictly the dastry "Aet under which the veneer m cheese boxes must be not less than one-fifth of an inch. in thick- will gle wiring. *, intended for export dotible, rather than sin - + x frequent complaints about Cana- dian cheeses being too heavy. Some of those exported - weighed 112 pounds. The United Kingdom trade does not want cheese weighing "'more--than--90.:pounds; and would even _ prefer them five pounds lighter than that for easier hand- ling. ; * ¥ _Another 'beef was about our eheese8 being too large for the boxes "they're packed in. This causes -them to go short on proper ventilation with resulting excessive mould growth, dampness and rind- formation. F * - ¥ Many - Canadian cheeses exam- ined, boxed as described, were found spongy when pressed with the thumb, in decided contrast to those from New Zealand, in the open crate. These 'latter showed -some slight mould, but were very firm and dry, ! * * * In addition, with cheese packed as tightly as ours, 'it is almost im- possible to remove the box with- so when the cheese is higher than the box, and the contents squashed from piling." The trade feel, and: rightly so, that the top of the cheese should come below the top of the side of the box, so that when the cheese are turned, the 'ends will he ventilated. "- RET 4 : Examination of Canadian cheese for quality found that, on the whole, the original grade was pretty well maintained on flavour. There was, however, some complaints. of de- fects, presumably caused by heat- mg, and these complaints are being studied by 'the Department, with a ~a-whole lot of tonnage from gome- living 'in Frankfurt, Germany, the old Jady didn't want to cross the street." : 7 Finishing Touches--Wenzel Beck, refugee from easter view to eliminating the 'cause, n Europe and his son put the finishing touches on their latest ship model---'Arkona"--before testing it , out in a swimming pool. Father and son worked 300 hours to make their ship seaworthy, using just their hands anda few tools 1, - While on the other side he heard : faulty - out breakage. This is particularly . get ness. And next season all cheese - require' | vogulations under the Dairy In- fF = British Challenger -- Top-class racing driver Raymond Mays speeds in his British racing. motor car during speed trials at Folkingham, England, airfield. sembled bylover a hundred British firms, has been designed to, "secure world supremacy with an expected speed of 200 m.ph. | | ducers Co-operat! "| ing Equipment Sporting Goods.~ Spectal-Teant "| Lake; Sfoux Lookout, Ontario, Canada. The car, made from parts as- readily admit. Of course, in those days, the wrestling was just an' added attraction, with: the hoofers and strippers constituting the main event. But it might work equally well, or badly, the other way around. : . £4 0) A ow "My wife is just aching to know when them . big Sunday Bingoes are going to start," said another gent with whom we discussed the situation and prospects. "That's the thing she's fondest of, next to bawling me out from coming home late to dinner; and she can't hardly wait to get into action." LE Here again we expressed a meas- ure 'of surprise. "Bui Bingo," we objected, "can hardly be classed as an athletic event." "It is the way my. wife plays it!" replied our friend. "OH, brother, any time she : makes Bingo and starts waving her arms in the air, the folks on both sides of her take more real punish-- ment than Joe Louis has handed out in his last eight bouts." + wk : But enough, for the presant,-re<- garding - a subject that has "been: thrashed out sufficiently, in.-'the press and over the alr, during re- . cent 'weeks, and that is Mable. to receive plenty more flailing before | it's all finally settled. But we do take the Jiberty of thinking what even those most strongly in favor 'of Sunday sports, are: going to be' a trifle astonished as to how many different and' wnexpected angles ent, rather than take it via radio, as we did the one we are writing about. : x. * For that New Years tangle ap- peared fo have just about every- thing; plenty of action--mixture of plays--shifting 'of lead--suspense right down to the -dying moments --with enough miscues and. fumbles to make you feel that it was human beings playing, not a bunch of Tarzans and Supernien, * * * And, from the -Mstener's stand- point, it had the immense advan- tage of being described by a broad- easter. who didn't try to make you . believe that war had been. declared, or that Joe Stalin had been aseas- sinated, every time one team gained a couple of feet--a very wel- -eome shange from some of whe microphone madstri we have suf- fered under, here and there, < 2 * * x * 5 : / x Besides, that game gave Ws one . of our rare moments of personal triumph. Someone who was list. ening along with ws, and who heard Ohio described as the "Buckeye State" happened to ssk us just what 1s & buckeye. And we 'pened to know, and remember, the cosrest answer. We wonder how many of you eould- do se well. * * . For a buckeye. is nothing more or less than what we rude Cana- dans. call a horsechestnut, ' Sure en knew it sll the time! : 3 '| King at Sanford, Hamilton. :| HOMESPUN YARN--made of long Virgin woo) den light amber 'honey. (no buckwheat), $5.76 each, 2 pails #11. Ontarlo Honey Pro- 8 Detrien Street, Toronto, New and 'used. Fordson 194" Bus Chassis--cars-- trucks. M. Chapman, Millbrook, Ont. . NE OHNBON Outboard Motors. Canadian Canoe Co., Peterboro Boats, Canoes, Trail- ers, bough Aola. hanged. Large stock used motors. Repairs by factory-trained .mechantes.-] Open MII HiHé~ except Wednesday. Strand Cycle, Hamilton. GUNE--Larse assortment new and used. ght, sold, d. Guaranteed repairs. Scopes, sights installed. Fishing Tackle, Hunt- FORD Tractors, Major Tractors. Prices. Open until nine except Wednesday. Strand Cycle, Hamilton. ; <= MOTORCYCLES, Harley Davidson. New and used, bought, sold, exchanged. Large stock of guaranteed used motorcycles, Repalrs by factory-tralned mechanics. Blcycles, and com- plete line of wheel goods. Open evenings until nine except Wednesday. Strand Cycle & Sports, RESORT--Good Fishing, wonderful location, Write Mrs. L. Christink, Box 573, Butterfly SIX REGISTERED Jersey bulls, from six to twenty-four months, for pale. Apply Arthur H. Rutley, Berwick, Ont. $3.76 PER ACRE buys clear title to 160 acres unimproved land, 11 miles) northwest - of Sundre, Alta. Make cattle ranch. Near big game, trapping. L. C. Merriman, 10711 Seven- ty-fourth Avenue, Edmonton, Alberta. HARROW Creamery, Harrow, Ont. 40 ice cream customers; sells 3,000 pounds butter per week in county, Apply W. 1106 Hall Ave., Windsor, Ont. TRUCKS FOR BALE 1942° DODGE 2 Ton Truck, in" good condition, | "High Stake Racks. Priced reasonably, 1944 INTERNATIONAL Truck. Chassis . with . cab," Long wheel base. In good condition, SHALE OIL COMPANY, ORANGEVILLE G. Fielding, 1--We teach you how. Experience Is um- ne ry. ; : 8--Our national and international advertising cawts helps you. . J 3--Rapid advancement to the right person. 32 you are over 38 years of age write Box No. 80, 138-18th Street, New Torohto, Includ- your name, address and phone number. : WANTED MARRIED OOUPLE without young children-- Hamilton, Separate house provided. 'Woman required' te an must have experiences. Box No. #1, - Ottaws SUFFERERS from Rbeumatic or Arthrie © = ox | of" dry eczema rasbes readily to this .stainless, odorless ointment, ! regardless of how stubborp or hopeless thes . OPPORTUNITIES FOR MEN AND WOMEN A--weok--in--commissions--and--bonumes lo ___im.__newspapers, magazines. radio - braad- "WHITE Hollind Turley Body feathers wanted. Particulars on fllustrated folder. K. P; Holl ander, 707 Read Building. Montreal, Quebee. ANTED: Light horses, Palominos or some thing with white markings or flashy color. PILE Dont auf < lon, : relief--treat painful "piles : medicated Dr. Chase's Ointment: ~ Soothes as it heals. A safe home treatment for over 50 years, = 33 . Antiseptic OINTMENT | How I Subaned Wild Fiery Itch- Dr, Dennis' amazingly fast relief --D, D, D. Prescription ssdid the nek; Worl a popula. cooling [ vd comfort from c YT caused 8, pimp e's eczema; pimples fi us #33! ven the t tense of itch - troubls or extra s! ) now. y and t application checks iteh of tone back. Ask Prescription t( ordinary FOR SALE --extra warm--long wearing--suitable for socke--siwash sweaters and other woollen gare ments, 2-3-4-ply, white, srey, royal blue, paddy green scarlet, maroon, yellow, brown, heather, black, fawn, white and: grey twist, $1.98 Ib., 10 Ibs. or over, 91.80 1b, idellvered. Northland aweater patterns 88c each. Adulfs; deer, bear, Indian design, curling. Childs; deer, bear, dog and squirrel, dancer, Indian design, knitting needles 35c pair. Mary Maxim, Box 120 Sifton. Manitoba. z - 1947 Commercial Jeep -- thirteen housand miles, Halt top, heater, would trade on Ford tractor, 200 wallon. Spramotor sprayer, traller i754 Some take-oft, 480 1b prises re, Sour-fow ©orop clearance. )! , Blenheim, Ont, By Sloan Coughs are dangerous If negl Get Relief Usually QUICKLY, # WITH Te Bronchial COUGH SYR A% ALL DRUGGISTS $5¢ MAabE By THE RIGINATORSYS ( ORDER now for your White ults, tested and gov a t 1 yr poss ernment a L orell Turkey Ranch, Marrow, p40 ; Das ISSUE 2 -- 1950 -A.--E."Boug,-857-York-8t.,--London,- Ontarlosa--- ith. DR. CHASE'S ~~ . '