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Port Perry Star, 21 Apr 1982, p. 6

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x ETTORE NESS ISIE SRE RIN NENA DIE CANS yd IN AH BEEN we IN FAN LLC LAL RTOS - EE LAO REN anh 6 -- PORT PERRY STAR -- Wed. April 21, 1982 414 Na SANT i * ERA Wy 3 0 AON 4! Ee DUR a GEOR ROBE mH remember when...? Oshawa's Eastdale Collegiate. The play was directed by Mrs. Diane Lackie and included a cast of Carol Aird, Robert McLaurin and Sharon Lackie. Mr. Gordon McMaster, a native of this community and former employee of the Port Perry Star, returned to his residence in Marysville, Washington, U.S.A. after a brief visit with family and friends from this area. Mr. and Mrs. Wes Crosier of Sunderland were honoured recently on the occasion of their 58th Wedding Anniversary. The couple dined with their family at the Rock Haven restaurant in Peterborough. Mr. and Mrs. Harvey Hall flew to Tampa, Florida for a vacation which include a return trip through Virginia, Washington and New York. chatterbox (continued) name. One day I took sex for a walk and he ran away from me. I spent hours looking for the dog. A cop came over to me and said, 'What are you doing in'this alley at 4:00 in | the morning," I said, "I'm looking for Sex." My case comes up Thursday. One day I went to City Hall to get a dog license and told the clerk I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I would like to have one too," Then I said, "but this is a dog," and he said he didn't care how she looked. Then I said, 'You don't understand, I've had sex since I was two years old," He said, "you must have been a very strong baby." I told him that when my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honour, I had Sex before I was married," and the judge said, 'Me, too." Then I told him that after I was married, - Sex left me and he said, "Me, too." When I told him that I has sex on TV, he said, '"'Show off." I told him that it was a contest and he told me I should have sold tickets. I also told the judge about the time my wife and I were on our Honeymoon, and we told him that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for sex. The clerk said that every room in the Motel was for sex. Then I said, 'You don't understand me, sex keeps me awake at night," and the clerk said, 'Me, too." I give up. My next dog will be Rover or Spot. comment Concessions: the big issue by W. Roger Worth CFIB Fealure Service No concessions. That's the battle cry of Canadian union leaders in the auto industry. But by promoting such a policy, the leaders may in fact end up depriving their members of badly needed jobs. The problem, of course, is that U.S. members of the same union have provided substantial wage and_ benefits concessions to the hard-pressed companies. In return, they've been given a form of profit sharing (if the companies make any money), and a modicum of job security. The companies will also attempt to keep work in American plants. The agreements are a remarkable turn of events. Adversaries that have béden fighting each other since the Great Depression have come to terms on arrange- ments that may save one or more of the auto companies from bankruptcy, along with the jobs they provide. It seems a sensible deal for both sides. Now consider the Canadian situation. If our union leaders have their way, wages here will be markedly higher than those in the United States, and there will - no job security. It goes without saying the companies could, and probably would shift some production to the United States, where workers are more co-operative and labor less expensive. The Canadian union leaders argue that auto imports from Japan, and not wages and benefits are causing the problem. They have pressed Ottawa to force cutbacks of imports. But the federal government has failed miserably. While the union leaders' militant campaign against concessions to the Big Three automakers is perhaps understandable (who wants to accept less?), they may have trouble maintaining member support. Indeed, the _ matter is so significant union leaders should consider putting the issue to a vote among rank and file including the thousands already on tem- members, porary o dei levol. p ve Rh BAO, 4s Trouble with your kids? Tough Love just might work A 17 year old girl who consistently ignored her parents curfew rules came home late one night to find the house locked, and a note pinned to the front door. The note said to the effect that if 'you can't live by the rules of this house, then don't live here'. There was enough money for a phone call, one bus token, and the address of the a local YWCA where the girl could stay for the night. Literally booting a teen- ager out of the family home is an extreme example of the Tough Love concept, which more and more parents in Canada and the United States are turning to these days in an effort to reach improved family harmony and deal with problem child- ren and teens. More than 150 parents attended a Tough Love meeting held April 14th at Uxbridge High School to hear advocates Jeri and Tom Elliott explain what the concept means and why some parents are having success when they use it in relationships with the children. Mr. Elliott who is a coun- sellor with the Toronto Board of Education told the meeting there are now some 15,000 Tough Love parents organized in community support groups across Canada He said the base of the concept is that all family members deserve to be treated with respect and courtesies. Parents, he said, must be '"'the executives of the home," set the rules, draw the bottom line and tell their kids that bad behaviour will be rewarded in kind. He said children and teens who constantly break the rules of the house must pay the "natural consequences," and that no amount of temper tantrums, cursing and swearing, nagging, pleading or begging on the part of the kids will change this. Mr. Elliott, who brought the concept to Canada several years ago from the United States where it was formed, stressed that Tough Love is not meant to replace family counselling, and at the same time, parents who form a Tough Love group should not expect'tt to be for their own group therapy or sob sessions. He used the analogy of a © ECONOMY COMPACT STANDARD & FULL SIZE teen-ager who has fallen part way down the side of a cliff. The Tough Love concept is for action, to get that teen- ager back up the cliff to safe ground. Once that has been done, then steps can be taken to ensure the teen-ager doesn't go over the edge again. In some cases, Tough Love parents have locked their teen-agers out of the house, refused to send them bus fare home when they run away for a few weeks, have had police charge teens with theft when they steal from the house, and even told the courts to put their kids in jail or halway houses rather than be released back into the custody of the parents. But Mr. Elliott said the concept can be applied to something as routine as a youngster who refuses to clean up the room or put dirty clothes in the hamper. And he recommended that parents who are having serious problems with their youngsters such as drugs or booze, start applying the concept to minor problem areas such as cleaning up the room. Crucial to the idea is that groups of parents must form together and be prepared to support each other fully when they decide to 'go to the wall" with their youngsters. He said parents often give in to their teen-ager demands out of fear of creating a scence. He cited one case where a family locked a teen out of the house at night and they let him in when he created a late night ruckus which disturbed the neighbours. Mr. Elliott said that these parents should go to their neighbours, explain the sit- uation and tell them to "expect a late night ruckus because the kid is going to be locked out of the house next time he comes home late. One case history involved a 14 year old boy who began physically abusing his single parent mother. When he got into a scrap with the law, the mother told the judge to lock him up, rather than release him to her custody. He spent a year in a half-way house, got straightened around and now at 17, his relationship with his mother is one of . respect. Mr. Elliott admitted that parents who finally agree to adopt a tough love concept will find it difficult and very RENT ANEW PONTIAC © LOWRATES © LONG TERM LEASING © TRUCK RENTALS PHILP OPEN: Weardors 1095 Fide Fotos 1 Setutdeys to 4PM. - Tough Love, advocates Geri [right] and Tom Elliott were guest speakers last week at a meeting held in Uxbridge. They claim there are now some 15,000 Tough Love parents formed in community groups across Canada. [See story for details]. painful. The word tough in tough love refers to how the parents may feel in certain situations. Parents must be innova- tive, even radical, when dealing with problems with their kids, he said. He mentioned one mother who took a chair to the front lawn of the high school and literally sat there all day to make sure her daughter stayed in school. The gimmick caused the daughter embarassement, but apparently the message got through. The Elliotts have formed a . consulting service, Tough- love Associates, for parents in a community wishing. to set up their own group. They charge a fee for a speaking engagement and they are now booked right through to June. And when a group is formed in a com- munity, they charge a fee for INCOME TAX RETURNS : FARM - BUSINESS - PERSONAL Also Computerized Bookkeeping.' ALEX J. SHEPHERD CHARTERED ACCOUNTANT consultations, workshops, and weekly sessions, to advise the group members on how to apply the concepts. The meeting in Uxbridge last week was sponsored by the Family Life series with help from a local service "club. The Elliotts have received a lot of media exposure over the past couple of years as more and more parents who have tried everything with their kids, decided to give Tough Love a try. : And Mr. Elliott said that parents groups formed in communities in- Canada, have received the support of social agencies, school officials, and police forces. Anyone wishing more information. about the concept of Tough Love and how to form a support group in this community should get in touch with the Elliotts at 95 London Street, Toronto or by calling (416) 530-1060. ed 985-7031 : : 250 Queen St., Port Perry [ | KIKI be} omens | cme "CARTWRIGHT HIGH SCHOOL *AT HOME DANCE* at BLACKSTOCK RECREATION CENTRE | SAT., APRIL 24,1982 8 at 9:00 P.M. Tickets may be purcha 986-4241. GENERAL ADMISSION: $10.00 Per Couple or $11.00 at the door. STUDENTS OR BY CALLING THE SCHOOL AT 'in advance from C.H.S.

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