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the HERALD Wednesday September Community News FagellB Family Violence Abuse victims span the ages By B PALMER Herald Special Death It is often death which parts the abuser from his victim Abuse victims are not just young women with small children Many women live a lifetime of abuse until death separates them from their male abusive part ners More and more often we read of female homicide victims who were killed by their spouses Sixtyseven per cent of all women murdered in Canada in died as a result of domestic violence Abused women are more likely to attempt suicide than women who are not battered and one study states that per cent of the women studied were found to have been abused Just a few weeks ago Carolyn at left paralyzed from being shot by her estranged hus band asked to have life support turned off Not only had she lived the past six months paralyzed from the neck down but was also in constant pain and unable to speak What had she done to be inflicted with this kind of abuse Sheti endured a 27year abusive marriage and had finally separated from her husband and filed for divorce Yes her hus band Raymond shot himself He was better off He died from his own gunshot wound and didnt have six months to think about a lifetime of paralysis and pain as opposed to death And what of the silent deaths Those of their four children rang ing in ages from to 27 News accounts dont document for us their pain and anguish To watch and live through an abusive rela tionship horrendous but to know your father murdered your mother and then committed suicide must be a difficult set of circumstances to rise above and move forward to any kind of positive future We in Hills are neither sheltered nor isolated from criminal activity We only need to read the papers and listen to the news reports to hear of robberies gunfire in our rural areas and sexual and child abuse We are part of a society that is far too ac cepting of violence While we live in a region which offers us a high degree of safety we need constant reminding that crime is here Although Goguens children are grown up they have lived through an insidious life as child victims of abuse They physical scars any child victims of abuse have are nothing compared to the psychological scars they continue to have from watching the violence in their own home life Like most child victims theyve HELP US HELP OURSELVES probably tried to keep the family secret inside and denied the ex istence of abuse in tum theyve likely accepted blame that does not belong to them The stress of their mothers abuse has taken its toll on them As abused mothers dont cope children often withdraw isolating themselves from their families and friends At a time when they should be enjoying their childhood these children feel shame fear and anxiety and may develop aggressive behavior pat terns to overcome their basic lack of selfesteem and in securities Children of violence will become maladjusted adults if our educational community and neighborhood cornmunitys dont step in to help them The trauma of abuse suffered as a child may lay dormant for many years only to rear its ugly head in middle or senior years The childhood vic tims of psychological abuse re quire our help now They must confront the abuse in their lives to be able to recover Not every child of violence becomes violent but children are at added risk if their problems are compounded by poverty alcoholic parents and deviant behavior patterns in their parents Those children will become our next generation of abusers and victims of Family Violence Endnote Information taken from Ontario Womens Direc torate and Federation of Women Teachers Association of Ontario Newsletter Jan 1991 Feel free to contact Jacle by directing letters to her attention at The Herald All cor respondence will remain con fidential Should you wish to speak to Jade call the Distress Centre at and your call will be returned If you are a woman or child in crisis or an abusive male wanting help call the Distress Centre or dial VON foot clinic The Victorian Order of Nurses Halton Branch will hold a Foot Care Clinic at the following loca tion The cost is 1500 For further information and appointment please call and 7128 The clinic will take place Georgetown and District Memorial Hospital Emergency Department Georgetown on Oc tober 1 pm and Oc tober 15 100400 Scholarship established In remembrance of the tragic event in Montreal December the Women Teachers Association established a scholarship and bursary fund to encourage female students to pursue studies in the areas of math science and technology An additional scholarship was established in memory of Leslie and Nina DeVilliers Successful applicants were Dianne Morrow Georgetown DHS who is entering Engineering at Queens University Jennifer Ballbacka OakvilleTrafalgar who is entering Engineering at McMaster University Akiko Aldershot who is enter ing a Science program at McMaster University and Melissa Ann Muller 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