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. i.loly-e ruler* Nalfhbore. There are many cranks of many Unas, hen la that vale ot Uan ; ^XZtSmZS*? "k""* "^^^ Whose g in.ssioa U i >ox nia*klnd,auJ n.. > rtoakl to wi. I. u&u Kci .iBty at u. l.jiu.m OftbeSSe. TI..TB* the man who atfci yo: ' Wl.al's scats * a*4 n i*eaui . who's pot the Rrip. e man a*4 oflern you a ti Tin i*eaui tend. Ui. kiiib Kirl. the w if.uBj viisj |(ri |>, Tbe wrtiioh who Mil. yoa fu uy jokes with ma* Infernal glee They should ill be with McCiuHj at the l<u There'* Uie crank who's always talking nhop. the rulhlft-" railroad brut*, Th* toothpick fiend, ihe youth who play* til midnight on the Hule. The (Irl wuo launches caramel*, ib. lawyer aiu his fee They should all bo with McGli.'.y at the bottom "I th* sea. There'* tbe man who reads statistics and who oruhln.i you with taets, Thi- dandy with the cloven breath who tramp Iwlweea tbe MU. Tbe uiao whu's in the way and ibinks there' eompetiy In three They aboulil all he with lloliinty at liie bottom uf tbe sea. Yea, tLsse aad many other crsiiks upon tb* (lol>e you II nnd. Wi.oee only mission leeuis to be to worry ]>oo But Nemesis u marching on, and boon they'l lately be K'BU dowu with Oau UeCJlniy at toe i uttoui o ADOPTED BY THE DEAN A BTOBT or TWO cocmii-a. ' To England, papa 1 bat why? ' " bjcauaf, dear, 1 (eel ure thai in what vac way thii war end*, *omo lime muni paa* before Ibe coonlry i* *eltled. You knowWbe present (MM of the Govsrnmen tb* scene* of the 31*1 of Uctour will be are to repeat themselves, aud will, I fear lead to nonMiking wor*e ; o, my cbild, am no looker bare to taka oaro oi you, the oonur you arc aa' I/ in England the beMar." Esperanoe uhud .1 d. " We Deed not ) .u, papa. J will do just as Monsieur Ler :.ur toil* me; only do not talk aa it f .t." bbe bid bar ' oo bin aboulder, and did not try to Alii* iaa aeoiaooa M. do Mabiiiuu held bar oloaaly, now and tbau whispering word* of comfort and trait, bat more generally keeping unbroken iilaooe ; until lu spile of Ib* ooming struggle LsperMice waa aootbed auu strengthened to endure. At length Oaapard oame m, dashed ami ea^er bat remembering Esperance, be ilit'.ed hi* enthusiasm. The room wa almost dark, lava from a faint k,leam from lbe*tove, by Ibid Le could nee her littl* while face raiaad. " OaSDttrd," ahe *aid, " u it you ? I* it nearly wme? ' " Va*, theria," te auawbriu, bending down to ki** ber ; "1 want you to be oui brave little tiramiur/, and nod a* ome thing before we etail " Klperancn hastened to prepare *ome oo'loe, aud in a few miualoa ibe three (at down to their canty meal, uoun of them orry thai the light waa dtni. Ten o'clock muck. M. de Mabillou aaid It waa tint* to go, and Oaipard, ever on the alert, WM ready at ouoe. " Courage, obene 1 " be wbiiprred, giving ''is ei*ter a farewod ki** ; " Lemeroiar will let you know how we net oo to morrow." Hbe let him go passively, and wilh trembling fingers tried to tie her father'* soarf " My brar* little) girl ! " ha murmured ; then, M the word of praiae proved too muoh for btr, and her teara ooold no loogtr be oonlrollad, he took ner in hi* arm*. " My preoioa* JiltleL^peranoe, God bteei yon ' " Hhe clang to him in a la*i, long embraoa, than watched him RO down Ibe ttair* ui ileiioa. Th* door oloaed opoo them, and be turned to aob oal bur griaf la Ibe arm* of the 1 tllbfal old JavotM. All the night a oonlinaoo* itream of NatiooKl Uoarda marched pail, Kiper- ana* took a alrang* pleacore in watuuing them, and in trytog to recogui/.e bar father'* battalion. In the cold, gray dawn aha nlont, and Javoit* pal her to bed, ha|nug thai *he would le[, late tb* ueil oraluK ao that the aaapeiuie might not win ao long. Bha wok* unfraahoi and weary, her heart aching a* *he heard the continual firing. Mme Ijimeroier, knowing thai tbu would be a trying day for bar, aant np an invita- tion to d' u rr. ana Keperanoe, who wa* a belicTor in " dulraction," wa* very glad to aooapt it. It U a ctianga meal, oonciiting of bad bread, obeeie, and oofl*e withoai milk, bit BO Boaroe had proviuona become, thai Kiparanoo thought it CJQIM laxariou*. M. K*meroier. a little, dried up man with a naroa, black muHtaobe, mad* her laugh with bit description of the porohaaa of the obaeae, and madame wa kind and oheerf ol. that ah* began to be comforted, and to look oo the bright aide of thing*, even wh*n later they heard that aerioiu ngbliog waa going on, and that the ambul- ance wa* filling fa*t. teperance had (pent th* wbul* ilay with Mme. Liemercier ; II wa* now doak, and ibe had j i returned to her own room, whan her >)aiok ear detected the aoond of fooMtepi , il niighi be M. Lemeroier, wilh freah newx. Hh* darted to tb* head of tb* italr*. Klowly the atep* draw neator, and, itraiaiag her eye* into tb* darkueei, ibe gava B liltl* cry of joy. " Oa*pard ! Qacpard ! il it really you ; " " Myaelf, and no olhtr, cherie," repli*>i tb* wall knowu voioe, then, a* the would kav* ombracad bin" Take care, tbi* right arm, of mine IH damaged. " " You ar* wounded ! " cried Kiperano*. greatly abookad. " A mere trifle, only B Haifa woand , I have jail had the bullet extracted." " Oon'l ipeak of it , it make* me *hnd- dar," aaid Kiperano*, lighting on* of the few remaining oandlea, that *ho uiigbl laa*t bar a>ea wilh 111* eight of her woandod hero. II* looked pale and exhanated, but aaamed to enjoy talking boat tb* day'* event*. Il aeomed that nothing bad been gained ; th* loaae* had been about equal on bolli aid**, and tb* bailie had utill batn raging wli >u ha kii the neld. " And papa i ' ked Kiperancu. " Quite wall when I left, and vary that I ooull taka back th* naw* to you." " Then there i . no cbanc* of hi* coming home to-night ? " riot the ilightMt. nnl -j* h* follow* my example. To morrow w* will go ap to tb* fortinoalions and a** bow affairs ar* pros- pering." This wM an excising prospect, and Ksperaooe bad great longing to be near her father ; *he thought in her ignorance, that il would be tamer to bear tb* luspense if she wer* within tight of the bait)*. Oat- pard wa* ajnob refreabsd by a night'* rest, and the brother anil enter set Out on iheir expedition eagerly and bopufollv. Tb* day wa* warm ana bright, then wa* a holiday feeling in tb* air, which proved irresislibls to many. Eiparaoos waa startled on reaching tbe rampart* to find the speotatori laughing, chatting, emoking, utterly regardless of tbe grtat tragedy that was going on II wai the first time she bad teen any fighting, and even from a distance the aoene wa* sufficiently terrible to be forever imprinted on her memory. Oaipard explained to her tbe positions) of Ihe differ- ent divisions, and aba tried to understand the plan of th* attack, but ber attention waa toon drawn away to th* long tile of ambulance* which wa* constantly passing into the city by one of tbe gate* close by. Terrible havoc was being made among the French - around the gate w* a .jrowd of anxious relatives, watching thi .. nbul- an' v eagerly as they passed ; now and then then wai a recognition, which made Kiper anc* shiver. " Let a* oome aad watch tco," she aaid, at length ; and Qaapard oonseolu.^ they took op their position among tbe anxious little group They had wailed long, and Kiperanoe bad began to feel faint with fatigue, and from Ibe long train of terrible light* paiiing before her. She closed ber eye* for a minute, when a half smothered ejacu- lation from Gaipard roused ber looking op she taw a litter being borne past, on il a National Guard, his uniform covered with blood. H*r heart throbbed wildly, her head swain, hot with a kind of desperation he forced herself to look at ibe faoe it waa indeed that of ber father. A great mist oame before ber eye*, sbs fell Gaspard pal bit left arm round her, and wa* conscioua of rslief . H* spoke to her. rib* caught tb* word* " Ambulance Americaine," understood what they were to follow, aid moved mechanically through the crowd. AI length they testohed ths Avenue d* I'lmperalrioe, and applied for admittance at tb* ambulance ; tiiey had to wait long, howtver, and Kiperance'i lean wen by thi* lime flowing fast. A young American lady, touched by the eight, tried to comfort ber. You are waiting for new* ot a friend ? " Of my father," sobbed ibe ; " oh I when will they trll as ? " - At toon as is poasibl*, everything i* done *o quickly now. See, hen oome* a messenger." See went forward and received th* whispered message, than inroad to Gaspard You most go in at ouoe to see your father , be prepared for tbe wont." Be is mortally wounded, then f " aaksd Gaspard, torniug pale. *' 1 fear so," rtplieu the lady. Without a word, Osaj ard took his aistsr by Ihs hand, and followed uie messenger into a cool, airy tent, when uotwilhsland- ing tba freab oases which wan constantly pouring in, all was orderly and well managed. They were conducted paat row* of pallid nileren, to the bad where M. de Mabilioo lay. Oaipard saw at once that tbe end was very near, and was more overcome than Kiporanot. Now that .the worst had oome, *be was tearless, her grief for tbe limn being overpowered by Ibe joy of seeing Her father. The nurae made room for ber, ind *h* knell by tbe bedside, smoothed hi* jair caressingly, aud whispered his name. He opened his eyes, smiling faintly. " We nave corns to see yoa, dear papa, iaipard and I." " Gaspard'* wound ,' " asked M. d* ilatullou wilh iint.. jlit " Going on nicely, papa." lit semsd relieved, then looking again to aepard, spoke one* more with gnat offort. " Take care of K*i>*ranor, and promise m*. Gaspard, to leave I'aris whan you oan take her to England. Trouble* will hioken hen." He broke oil suddenly bis features con- ulsed wilh pain, hi* groan* impressible. The nurse tried to persuade Kiperanoe to [O, aoxiont to tpar* her tbe light of ber ather's terrible suffering, but nothing ooald ndnoe her to leave him. In th* next lull iie *poke to ber. ' We mail not doabt, ur<|ae*tion, liltl* peranoe -remember, Natu Baixmt q\u outa ekvtt coHCOurtrtl eiuemkU on him " L ben, a* tb* agony grew mor* intense Speak to me, lusperanoe let m* hear yoar voice. ' 1 will *ay yoar favorite IUIM, dear leipa," she faltered, and in low, trembling one*, the repeated one of Viator Hugo'* iQtifnl versos. The pain gradually died oal of hi* faoe, and an Oaspard and Kiper- aoce bent down to kiss him, he even smiled. After that he nolioed nothing, bnl lay wilh closed syas, sometimes murmuring be lines Kiperanoe bad repeated, " 1 tutt i ct Ihtii." and the last tint* adding, aiuty, il gittnt" A tew minute* of unooneoiouine** elapsed, and Alpbonaa de ilabiUon'i troubled life wa* over. CUAPIKR V. Ths Amsrican lady, who bad acted a* nnrna to M. de Mabillon, did the kindest most sensible thing ihe could have lone look Cspsranoe in her arms, and let ter ory quietly. G**pard, meanwhile, was peaking to an attuadaut about the funeral whioh was to taka place early the next morning, lie soon returned to ber side, [waking very gently- " Dear Kiperano*, w aust oome ; ws ilnder madams." With a strong offort. Einnranoe oon- rolled lieratlf satti oiently to murmur hnuki and farewell*, and allowed Oaspard o lead her sway. At the entrance they paused for a moment. It was bard, very hard, to return o tbe world. Tbe sun shone brightly, the tree! trafflo want on busily, all seemed iruelly the same, while their lives had sod- lenly been robbed of happiness Uaspard wai, perbap*, ih* most to l>s tilled, for with him reiied all Ihs responsi lilily ; already ha fell Ihe charge of hii little sitter wai no sinecure already the harassing thought of Iheir poverty, began to press upon him. With thi* in bit mind, his first question was practical on*. " Oan yoa walk, oherie ? 1 think we ought hardly te sll jrd a tisore." i* thought him a littl* heart lee* ; she jott inclined bar bead, and the; walked bom* in perl act silence. Maan while, Oaspard, tired oat with tb events of tbe last two days, and weak from hunger ant] loss of blood, began to grow faint. Unas h* tumbled and almost fell bnl Kiperanot) wa* too muoh absorbed 11 ber grief to notice and from very neoeisil he forced himself to keep up. At length they reached home, au climbed the long night of slurs, Javotte hearing their approach, cam* to DM* them, bat Kspsrano* col short her inqoirie* and clung to bar cobbing. A* for G aspen: be passed on qaitoly into tbe salon anc groped bis way to tb* sofa, just oonsoiou of relief in the feeling that he need n longer make an effort to M* through th gathering darkness no longer straggle keep hi* sense*. Javotte ooming presently into tbe room gavs a little saraam. " Jfoa Ditu I bat i i* impossible that w* low Monsieur Oaa pard also ! " Epsranos tamed round in horror ; tb white, unconscious face did indeed loo. death- like. Bbe bent over him in an agony of grief. " Ah, Javotte, I have been ao selns h, quite forgot bow tired he most be, and h said not a word." * Wail tbso, child, be has only fainted I will fetch some win*- there I ***, h revives. Ah ! he grows like hit bleaaec father, who never complained Esperance watched in anxiou* silence by tlow degrees Oaspard struggled back to life. Ha would fain have resisted th* return ing consciousness, awsrs that there was a great weight upon bit mind, and longing to escape it. When, at last, he was recovered and opening bis eyes saw Ksperanoe'i tear-stained face, bo remembered every thing, and for tbe nnt time broke down completely. Kiperaoo* was thankful for those tears woman- like, she loved Gaspard far more now thai be gave way to his emotion, than she had, when for ber *ak*, be bad borne u| through tbe long walk. Bhe onpt nearei to him, and wa* glad to feel hi* arm roon< her, and hm cold trembling band pressing her*. Nothing la snob a close umter a* i oommon grief; Oaspard and K*peranoe bad never before bean so much to each other 1 Troth to tell, Oatpard had hitherto been very much self-engrossed. Tbe early loss of his mother, and his solitary education, had strengthened tb* natural tendency but privation, griaf, and hsavy responsi ulity, ware CBing their best to roase him. iOsperanoe'i new love wa* a further help . she had always been too much wrapped up in her father te spare many thoughts for Gaspard, bat now that he no longer needed her loving oare, she wa* able to transfer all her solicitude to her brother. All thi* ol oonra* did not take plaosat once, bat il bad it* date from thai terrible evening when in the cold, dark, lonely salon they first realizad Iheir orphanhood. Who has not fall ths utter misery of waking in the morning after any great change, tbs sense of oppression, ths dawn ing ojnsoiousnsss, tbe awtol realisation ? We learn from tb* very keenness of the pain to valo* the forgetf ulnes* of deep. Kiperano* had passed through it all, when she awoke on thai dreary 1st of December. Every thing reminded ber ot ber grief ; the perpetual firing wa* Mill going on, bat on* National Onard would never again serve hi* ooontry , then was tba tramp of a battalion marching down ihe street, but never more ooald she look from Ihe window to wave a farewell to bar father ; within the house she could hear Javolte preparing Ihe ooflea only two cups would be needed that morning. And than with a rush of tear*, Ksperanoe for the first time asked th* question, which we too often allow to embitter our griaf " Why .' ' Why bad Ibn sorrow oome to them ? Why had her fathar fallen, when hundreds ot others bad escaped 7 Why did God allow war at all .' If ibe ooald only see how good was to come oal of evil I Ia the midil of her questionings, Javotte entered, a world of love and tenderness ia her wrinkled old faoe. Kiperanoe, for tb* first time, fully realized how gnat a com- fort th* faithful old servant wa*. And my child has slept T " ahs inquired, anxiously, hsr harsh voioe unusually softened. ' Yee," sighed Kiperanoe, wearily. " Kiss me, pluase, Javolte, 1 am vary deaolate." Tb* old servant obeyed, murmuring aoft terms of endearment over hsr, but Kspsr- aooa suddenly started back. Javolte, how terrible thin you hav* grown ! your bone* feel quite sharp." Javotte shrugged her shoulder* COB- tentedly. " Thai may be, child, bat then one doe* nol expect te grow fat in a siaga." But you are thinner tbau any one I have yet seen, muoh mor* even than aladaine Lemeruiar." "Chull Why, child, I em an old woman," replied Javolte, ibaking hsr head rsprov- ' | one oan not be alway youug and nnwrinklsd. Dot oome ! taka your ooflee, oberie, we loee our time, and I mo*t go juickly to th* market or we uball grow thin too soon. ' Ksperanos wa* laliifled for the time, and Javotte left the room, glad to end the dis- cussion, and marmuing under her breath, ' My liltle blessed one 1 dosl think I would not rather starve than see thee suffer 'I " Ksperanoe had just finished her toilet when she heard Uaspard's step on th* staircase, Bhe hastened to meet him, surprised that he should hav* been out to irly. " Have you been to have yoar wound dressed ? " *he asked. Hi did nol answer 'or a minute, aud then Kspsranos under- stood thai he had been to their father's interment. " Ton should have taken me, too," she said, ber eye* idling. Why did you go all alone .' " I did think of you, but you were sleeping, and 1 could nol bear to wake yoa ; besides, it WM a loug walk to tbe cemetery , yoa shall go to-morrow, and tak* soms immortelle*." Bbe turned sway and began to heat Qaa- pard'i ooflee over a spirit lump. " Did yoa ste ths American lady," tbe asked, presently ; ' tin one who was so kind . " Ye*, I taw hsr for a moment, and she sent yoa this." Hs dnw out a little packet, wbiob Kiper anew opened eagerly. It contained a look of ber father's hair, and bar mother's wedding-ring, which he bad alwsyi worn. How good, bow kind of hsr to ssnd them I " she eiolaimed, tear* running down her cheek* ; " I ihaJl alwayf love the American*, Gagpard." Bbe pat on tbe ileoder ring reverently II oomtorted her a little on thai dark day and through the darker day* that followed (To be Continued.) The St. I lair TH anel. A not able tunnel it being rapidly exoa- vated under tbe St. Glair River at Port Huron, Mich. Il it for a tingle-track rail- way, and u to be 6,000 feel long, with pproachet aggregating an equal length, or U, 000 feel in all. Of the whole duianoe 8,690 feet it nnder the river, when tb* grade will b* nearly level . from thenc* it will rite each way at th* rat* of 1 fool in 60. Th* tannel it lined with oast-iron platei 2 inch** thick and 18 inehet wide, with 5 inch flange* all around. They weigh about 1,000 pound* apiece, and 13 of them with a small key -piece make a circle 30 feet in diameter. The flange* are f aoad aad securely bolted together. The plate* for tbe Michigan ide are made in Detroit, and those for the Canadian tide in Ham- ilton, ao a* to avoid tbe payment of doty. Tbe toil i* a bio* clay, and the tunnel it driven by mean* of a shield 21 feet li inch** n dimetr and 16 fett long, weighing 60 ton*, which it foroed into tbe clay by a nom- ber of 125-ton hydraulic jack* with an ag- gregate power of 3,000 ton*. After each ad- vance of the shield another ring of plate* it pat in position behind it by the ate of crane* in about an boar'* lime, while 21 men remove tbe clay that ha* entered the shield. Work hat been carried on in thi* way from both tide* for tb* U*t eight month*, and up to March -th, 1,577 feet of the tunnel proper had been completed on the Michigan side, and 1,822 on the Canada tide. If DO unforseen difficulty ocean tbe remaining 3,100 feet of tbe tunnel can eaaily be linubed in the present year. 1 hree houdred men are at preaent employed on the work* and during the monih of Feb- ruary 76 feet of tannel WM built, an average advanoe of 207 feet per day. Thi* progreaa wan mad* through! soft clay with an occasional pocket of <juickiaod, and without the aid of oomprtfated air, for whose ute, however, provision ha been made in case wMer or very aoft ground shoold be encountered. An occasional inflow of gas ha* been disposed of by turning on a strong air current. Tbe tannel i* lighted by electricitv, warmed by team and well ventilated, ao Ibal the work i* done under verv favorable condition*. Tb* St. Clair Tunnel Company it doing the work with it* own men, and when com- pleted the tunnel will be a oontinnon* iron > hnder '-'0 feet in diameter and 6,000 feet long, and it* cost, with that of th* ap- I roach..-*, tracks, BIO., will be about 82,600,- XX). Joseph liobson, of Hamilton, Unt., ibe Chief Kngineer of ih Tunnel Company, la* furnished th* data from which tbu de cription baa been prepared. The air locks were built by tb* Detroit Bridge J: Iron Co., of Detroit, Mich. Tht Enyuuenng and Suiltliny Record. Ttor WorlV* fmlt. Tb* World'* Fair Bill M it now stand* may be condensed aa follow* : 1. Tbe Fair shall be held in Chicago and hall be inaugurated in 1802. . Il ihall be under th* supervision of a Government Commission appointed by he President, an equal number of it* mem- >en to be choien from each of the two eading political parlies. 3. It shall be directly in charge ol a cor- raration orgaiiizad under th* law* of llmois. Th* capital stock mail be at aaat tt.OOO.OOO.of whioh 9500,000 mu*l be paid in. 4. Tbe Commission shall allot ipace for exhibitor*, appoint jodgea, award pre miumt and hav* charge of all intercourse with Ihe representative* of fonign nation*. o. Tbe corporation it to prepan plant and role* for th* Exposition, ubjool to ap- iroval of th* CGmmiiiion. wON 6. The President of the L oiled Stute* ball give notice by proclamation of the .ate* for the opening and closing of th* Sxpoaltion. 7. All foreign article* intended solely or exhibition shall be admitted free of doty. 8. The United Slate* will nol be re*pon ible for tbe act* or liabililie* of the Fair corporation. 9- Tb* Government shall make an ex- libit, th* expense of wbiob i* to be met by n appropriation of 1,600, 000. ThU exhibit hall include a tally equipped life-eaving tatlon. Mr, UltMon and Iniurmnre BfeB. Mr. Gibson received a deputation in 'oronto yesterday afternoon oontuliog of Meoiri. T. B. Maoauley, B. H. Brown, C. Innter, of Toronto, and Wm. Brew*, of lamilton, representing assurance com- panie* whose head office* are situate out- Ide of Ontario, and propose an amendment o Mr. Leys' bill to amend the Assessment , providing that no discrimination tumid be made in the rate of taxation itween the companies they represented nd Ihe bom* oompanie*. Mr. Gibson romind to give the matter doe ooniidera- ion. TBA TABLE GOSSIP UK SIDE INUOBL Us killed tb* noble M dioklvte. With the p* n be made ku in mitteae. Hade them with the (ur aide iaside . Mada tuein wiili the skin side outside . He, to *et the warm sido inide. rat the incite k nsMeomude, Be, to get i he oold side SJUUide, Tut the warm lide, fur Sula luside, Thai's why be put tbe for side iaside, Why he i>ul tbe stiu ti*> ouulde. \Vhy he turned them Inside outaide. Spring openings. Tb* tan shos is here again. Trousers an made narrower. Easter cards ar* not in favor. Amethysts are in gnat vogue. A big demand for striped hose. Emerald caff battens are freab. Anything pretty i* now "smart." Borne parasol* are fringed with P*rf nmed pencils are a new accessory. Philadelphia street* have 26,043 lamp*. When money talk*, of coarse it talk* cents. Tbs hotter the razor the cleaner tba aha vs. Hen* telling. Getting ready for Easter. Ths spring vest shows a great expanse of shirt. An early spring jumping out of bed at 5 o'clock. "Olaied" pars sols will rt fleet next ium- mer's son. Floral braoelal* are worn with evening OOStUIPSS. Ths dots on new veils are far apart, to resemble beauty (latobea. " I go*** we re allorankson pens,"said a candid dealer in thai line. Harold, musing- She *aid ah* liked tbe kiss. I got it from her own month. Live* of bankers oil remind ns We should m*k* our Bi>eak in lime. And la skipping leave bebiud u* Fooiprluis u>uo ot*er cliroi. The oldest iuhalma.nl will always di*. bat he can never be Jtad. The more tba pity. A bonnet for an Kaater bride i* of white) cloth, shell-shaped, and lined with shall pink. Time will tell, bat the ordinary man with an important secret won't give lima a chance. The messenger bjy's iuy nol be ex. otly " Tbe Pace Ibal Kills," bat it certainly i* tb* pace that kill* time. There it a girl in Brooklyn who spalls all ber words backwards. Last night she) was so astonished when the spelled " ra- viver " Ibal she swooned. " \e*. I'd like to drop around to church on Sunday," amid an op-town man to an inquiring pastor, " bat tbe Sunday paperi ar* so confounded big." Owing to tbe probable scarcity of io* next summer, the giving away ot an Ms) gorg* at Oueonte recently can only be looked on a* rookie** extravagance. Shopper Too may give me a dollar 1 * worth uf Ihosa strawberries, plea**. 1 'ealer Sorry, ma'am, bat w* don't alia*) strHwberrui. I'll sell you a M hoi* on* tor 11.50. " Let m* te*," said the young house- keeper at tbe nsh market. " Snppoa* yoa send me home B niee North rive* cod wilh a good roe and a box of aar dine*." That Awful Car****. Fifteen killed and thirty seven ounded," wen tbe football oasualities in Kngland since lit of September last. And et we bavs been so often told that modern attlis are less bloody than tho*s of a less oisntifio ags. Perhaps the plan ot loading ootballt with dynamite would lessen tbe wf ul carnage of a ' Union llertld. football match. Porb eft All Ar.muil. "How beautifully soft il it," hs mar- mared, laying his band on her glorioos whit* arm. How Is** beautiful, bat oh, *o much ofler," she tenderly replied, laying her swelled hand on th* top of hi* venerable ad. Mn. Gadabout What tort of person i* ,. Mil _u. na move<1 f n|0 y,. Mm. Chaffer I don't Between yon and me think the is neit door to an idiot. Mn adkbont (innocently) I think to too, my Mrs. Milman, who xt boots to you ? link much of her. The only rtow*rs proper for street wear n violets or lilliaa of the valley, and they ol in great quantities. The immune olu*ter. of roaes effected by tomt women r* ts bad style M huge diamondi. TUX eu> i Tbe roes and Illy side by side Wen m a bouquet pent . " Ah I ' Uie roMt eieiaiued, " you're (air to *e. ' And the Illy said, , Uf oours*. tee he ! but yuu oauuut I'urruw anghl from me, For I haven't ijot a scent." Among tbe "grand old men" of oience in England there are several pas* HO. bir George Airy is 85 ; Sir Kiohard Owen, sj ; bir Edwin Chadwiok, 89 ; Mr. Janiee Glauber, MO. In the church thai* are a dozen stout old prelate* between M and 'K) and good for many yean yet. " Whether a gentleman should lake off hit hat ia an elevator containing ladiM depend*," said an authority on hat etiquette yesterday. In some elevator* the rapid motion of th* oar* creates a draught, eo it is nol *o much a queetion of good manner* ai of self preservation." !IU.l.\M<'sl-nu> IA1MT. Uh ! hau i I'urion was e, geutleouu Who caiue of deoeut iwu, le , lie built a church in Dublin town Aud uu II fin a tiH>|'lo. Ku father wan a it>l&*ln-r, His mother was a bra iy, His aunt was au o abaughneMy, His Boole an O Urely. H. Kider Haggard has ijoietly diaap l>9ared. He i* nol at hi* country seat in England and hi* London haunts know him uol. It i* generally tuppoaed lhai h* baa gone to the Orient for inspiration, bin thin is denied b>y people who claim to hav* seen him leceutly in Scotland, t'erhap* Haggard i* trying the advertising dodge. A good story i* told of th* celebrated aw- geon Profeeaor UiUrolte, of Vienna. lie was aaked a ihori lime ago to perform am operation upon a Kuaaian Jew, and h agreed to do the tame for a fee of 250 guineas. On making the journey to Ib* small town in whioh hi* patient lived he wa* informed that the Jew had suddenly died. However, in order that h* ihonld uol sufler lost by the traniaotion, th* Professor was asked whether he would treat live hospital patients for a fee of fltty guineas each. Ha ooepted th* offer ana did the work, and jail as be wai starting homeward ha ascer- tained that one of the five patients upon whom we had operated was the Jsw who was reported to have been dead ao at least th* story runs. 8*->wloa Ladle*. Tb* W. C. T. U., of Toronto, affords a good inslajici- of feminine sagacity. It appear* thai the one police matron of Ib* city we* in danger ot being dismissed Bat the W. C. T. U. took time by the fore look and aanl a depulation to auk th* appoint- ment of a aeoood matron, believing that to demand mor* would be a good way to keep what they bad. The result proved their wiadom tbe present matron having retained aud given better hour*. - A Ktiok ot obawiag gam is a small affair, but John B. Ourtii, of Portland, Me., bao made nearly $1,000,000 in th* m*nu(aolon of ft.