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WON BY All ENGLISHMAN A LOVE STORY. I ohncktwl with delight, and Indeed my 07 M to greet that I wai in menial fr I luu latjl remark of Diane's mitcht be too pointed, and would reveal the drift o( oar allumont; bat fortunately for at, end somewhat oddly, oontiduriog the excep lional intelligence of oar hi-arers, oar obser vetions and mirth rx.itcU no apparent tarprisi; and iJiaut-'n parent*, while warm ng to the oocversaliou, winch beoame gjaoAYal at this time, seemed to ooaiider me ot no account whatsoever, while they relaxed their llxo.l atteotioo oa thtir daughter's movement*. I knew too well the hold which propriety hai over Frerob people of all classes and all ages to exhibit e-ven to tbe girl I eo passionsti-ly loved, and whoee love 1 now felt autbori/ttl to win for m>aelf, any other ei;u or token of my admiration than tboee wluoh word* allowed or iba play of tbe countenance revealed ; bnt willi a girl like hoae boart jiJ bare tbe warm bertonl. and whoee eool wai to pare that it ooald not bide the troth of what tat bit, wordj and looka were ample to convey all I witbtd ; end I can never forget bow ninuolarly beautiful wai the reception ot those meaitKet of love from one young bear* lo aco;ber, tnd with what rapture 1 marked in Diane'e e>ee her ap- preciation of tbe lore the had reeolved to accept and to return. By tbe end of dinner we were one io heart, toal. mind, and pnrpoae, without having laid one ey liable which any one coald take ap ; without on my part having made any formal declaration, or obliged ber to give a single exploited answer to any specilied request. Bnt for all that, the electric tpark whioh prepares the storm had been airuok ; and strong in oce another'e love, young and in experienced though w re, we had made op oar mindt to flrfh- u one another, and to bear cheerfully ' \ilt that would eoeae, certain of a h- -nly praoe on earth when the strong w oar earneet natorei bad lacoeeefullj .ihered tbe tempeet about to rage opo nr devoted headi. At wa roae frui. .oner, and all returned lo the drawing rco a in the order in whioh we bad oome into dinner, we gave each other bat one look a look to fall of deep, I>asionat3 love that any one who ooald beve teen it would have repaired no other of oar determination to eettle matteri oariilves, and al tbe tame time so infinitely tender that il amply compensated for the ai.ienoe of those more usual, bnt in France lest customary, preaenrei of tbe band anc arm, whiob, if they are only natural and excusable, are Itss respectful to the loveC object before tbe wordt have been pro ncuaotd whioh ooneeorate the eogagment Boon after tht coffee had been isrved the luenjaise'i carriage wai annooncad, tnd the tcok ber leave with Diani Happily, M. de Bralenille remained -o I bad tht atisfaclion of seeing Diane to her carriage, while the oount gave bit arm to her mother. I then in .1 ber I should oall on her father next day early, if indeed I bad not Ibe oppor tunny of teeing him that very evening thai I trotted the knew for what motive n and that, had I by any miifortune mil taken her sanction to this proceeding, I im plorad of her to lay eo. Kheimiled onset tbcae maddening smiles which limply lent all my senses reeling with intoxicated pleasure, and merely aaid in her ordinary voioe, as if the wished her mother lo bear, " Do not forget my roses before yon leave for England. Mademoiselle Oaroox would be furious if yon did not admire them, ribe II certain there is nothing in the world like them, and I hope you will tab soribe to that sentiment." " I shall certainly call with your mother's permiaaion," I replied, " though I am already of Mademoitelle Garoux't opinion." "Mother." laid Diana to Mademoiaelle de Breteutlle, " at what time did yon lay M. de Maupert i family art coming to tee you to morrow T " " At abont three. I belitvi," replied the marquise, while ber cloak wae being pot on. " Then at vtbal lime can Mr. Ytre oome an 1 bid as good-bye T " 'Will! o'clock suit him?" ' It It too late for him, mamma," taid Daine, " If he has to leave in the evening." ' Would Monsieur prefer 3 o'clock ?" 1 Ooald be not oome to breakfast at half past eleven." " Uaine," aaid Mademe de Breteuille, " what a child yon are I Mr. Vert knows you art a i< inert." " Ho I am t " exclaimed Diana, laughing, and looking at mt. " Commt o'est drola I " the replied. " How the part suite yoa I " I remarked. "I loppoae," the laid, "thai dinner mnil have aome influence on these thing! ; because, curiously enough, I do feel a flantrt now, and 1 did not before." " Doel a liinctr write ?" I atked ai her mother stepped into Ihe carriage. " By Ihe govsrnees's post sometimes," the replied, smiling; and thtn, shaking hands with no, entered the brougham laughing. Ai toon ai sht had disappeared, Ray- mond de Chantalit who wai really an intimate friend of mint to much to that we called each other by onrChriitian names aaid, II Yoa ooald have married that girl if you had been clever." I ihall marry ber, though I am not," I replied. He looked at me a moment. " That's well laid," be remarked, " but .lilli'Tillof aeooinplithment." " Why t " " 1'arbloa 1 becante another man bat forestalled yoa." Yes-with the father." " And maybe with tbe girl." " I don't think ao." " Certainly with ber mother." " That may be." " Two parents against you it too much." II 1 must bear that evil." ' Oome and have a cigar before yon oom mil suicide." " How T " " By marrying or by attempting to defeat French marriage by Knglish wayi." " I shall be happy to dlt in eithtr oante." " Barely your English blood it calmer than that phrase would imply T " ' Its oalmnoM lies in itl determination." And lie determination ia to ruio the) happlneas of a young and beautiful girl, in order lo prove that ber parentt, wbo loved ber and Dave sought ber happiness only, may be shown to be io Ibe wrong, because an agreeable young man of twenty -five years of age hai ohoeen to fall in love with their only child." My dear Raymond, yon quite mistake me. Had I not the knowledge that M. de Maupert wai positively distasteful to Mademoiselle Diane, I would never have allowed my own fellings to be known or perceived." " But, 1 ' taid the oount, "tnrely yon must be aware that tbtrs it nothing new in a girl ditliking the hatband chosen tor ber. Oar French girli are no exception lo the rale of humanity, that we all prefer what we selecl ourselves to whal others oontidrr best in our intereil : bnt they get over il in lima, and and by wondering how it it they ever opposed their parentt' with." I quite understand what you lay, bnt characters differ ; and Diane'i nature it not that of an ordinary French girl, and will submit to that detpotio rule whioh may aniwer in a few oases, seldom prove* fortu oale in most, and results in terrible misery a one out of ten marriages that eon traoted." " My dear friend." replied Ihe co ml, believe me, my niece, of whose character rou evidently know more than I do, but for whose beaoty I oan quite appreciate ) oar admiration, for I never aaw her look ao well is this evening, come* froom too French a smily not to be doomed to tbe traditional 'ate of Franoh girli. Make your mind eaty ; nd though a short while iinot I regretliog the necessity of your departure, [ rejoioe over it now, at it will core yon of a patting and hopeless fancy. You are too ponog to cope againtt tbe position and otluenoe of M. de Maupert, and though I lave no doubt the future it bright whiob ocrnt before you, dismiss my neioe from any share in il. Indeed, at your fiiend, I ould recommend your not thinking of marriage at all. Remember Ibe old proverb, Man ni nous, marlona BOOS, Hetums nous la eurde au eou " Bnt, Raymond," 1 taid, " I am decided and if I oonld feel that yon ware the friend yon alwayi were, I would tell yoa that your niece ii quite ai decided at I am." Hai aba told yon so ' " " Not io to many words." 'Then bow do you know" " By a thousand and ont tokens. " " Mon oher I " he exclaimed, ' thai it very vagoe, and, lo tell yoa the tratb, not quite complimentary to my niece, for il would teem lo imply that tht it either a coquette or it deceitful." Deceitful I " I screamed " ahe deceit- ful ? Why, of all the French girle I have ever known aba it Ibe only one that I oan absolutely oall truthful, loyal and airtight- forward." " Not very kind to oar girli," remarked Raymond, in an amoaed rather than a tevere tone. And at to the coqaetle," I weal on, " if a deeire to tland true to her love, and a wiah to do ao without offen ling the parents she respects, it ocqaetry, loan the need not fear the appellation, for il done ber honor." " Allans ! " and the count, good- hamorrdly , ' I see she hat a champion, and I with htm snooeee, though I fear Don Quixote hat a representative in your per- ton ; bat go to Madame de Chantalis ; the understands tbfss matteri better than I do, and will relish having a hand in thit romantic botinets ; our union waa a very proeaic affair, and our lives have lot! noth- ing by bring nnpoetioal at the commence- ment." " Yon were not forty-two, aad the at the outset." I aaid. That ii the only sensible remark you have 5 el made," replied Ihe count, as he opened tbe door of hit smoking room. Hearing us going in M. de Bretenille and Madamo de Chantalis joined nt. Al they did ao I want up lo the former, and asked whether he would allow me to tee him on a private matter the next morning. He re- plied thai he would be much honored by my vimi. and would he at D>V " orders at any hour I pleated to name." I have promised to oall and lake leave of tbe marquiae at 3 o'clock; perhaps you would allow me to tat yon immediately after. 1 ' I did thit because, ai I anticipated hit possible aniwer, I feared I would DO! be tlowed to tee Diana again after receiving it, and tbil prospect wai too painful to corn- template; but in a manner whioh bad much softened sinoe dinner he had made no ob ection, but on tht contrary told me I would Ind him in hit ttndy among a heap of stuffed animalt and papers, engaged in coin riling a dictionary of zoology whiob he bought might be completed if he lived to i hundred, bat had liltteohanoeof enlight ening hii generation if he were not accorded a longer life than moat men. II taut bien patter le tempe," be re- marked, " and that it bow I ipend my time when I am not at the club." Yon will mitt Diane." laid the countess, who, I thought, might have spared mt the tad reflection the remark entailed. Not at all, because, ihe will never leave niTiir," replied the marquise. No one wbo marries my daughter oan do ao on nuy other condition." I'his I thought wat directed to me, bnl . listened without making any remark. Nor," continued tbe marquiee, " do I think that Diane would oare to leave her old father." Not so old," remarked Raymond. A father alwayi seems old to his child," laid the marquise. " Beeidea, Diane bat many tastet ; she it an extraordinary girl. I r fam-iKs are not those of other girli, and her tenacity ii lerfn-tly larpiislng. If she helps me In any of my reeearohee, and i feel inclined lo give up a talk I some imes lind too weariaoma, to at to devote another time toil whan I oan bring a mind reeher and more lucid to lit discovery, Daine will continue il io my abeenoa and greet me at dinner with an ' I have found I, papa, 1 whioh putt me to thame and ipresses me deeply." How I drank in these wordl, and how I gloried in having fonnd favor with such a character I " He Manperl," continued the count, did not like her to dine out thit evening, and I told ber to. She aiked me whether ibnre wai anything wrong in it. I oonld not aay there wai. Her mind wat made up, and all the entreaties, of her mother were absolutely futile. As I could not back Daac alone U the MOM of thia breach of the rules whioh guide toe conduct of an sngaged yeung person in France." ^^_^ II wai clear that this simple-minded an excellent man wa* no schemer ; it wat equally plain that be adored bin danghte and that aha could rule him aa aht pleased These were Important points to note , bu I wat no Ian surprised by hit talking thnt openly before me M if he wished t ooovsy information tor my gnidanoa thai by the apparent ignorance he either affectet or entertained of my ttntitr.ents for hit daughter. I did not reflect that until I addressed him direotedly on the subject he would, at matter of course, appear wholly ignorant and would treat me ai tbe moet nnoon oernad being ha might catnally conn aorotn ; bat for all thai, be wat ilowl turning into that lightning conductor wbic! Daine bad to wittily aiked him al dime* whether he would care to be in order i protect at both from tbe impending storm Looking causally at hit watch, th mai'i'iii found it later than be thought got up, and respectfully kissing nil siller' hand, winning ma " Au revoir a demain,' and shaking hands with Raymond took bit departure. I got op alto to tay good-bye, when tb countess made me eit down, and OMM oul at to the proceeding! of Diane and my ,!!( that eveuiug. Addretelng her hatband, the laid to him My dear, we have to stand by these twi loven ; for in Ihe whole course of my lift never taw such open lova-makiag on both tides." (To be continued) . up her mother i argument! the bat had her bat " (turning to me) " yon matt montlear, thai my fatherly weak (believe, Why the Bllxlr DM at Omrt. A fakir in medicine had jott opened oa io Hi. Thomae, wbeo a itordy yonn, farmer pushed hii way into the crowd and mid : See here, mister man, you were over a Clifton in June 7" Yet, sir." Yon were telling thit same fluff .'" I wai." Warranted to curt rheumatism, nan ralgia, headache, ague, bad liver, indigeetion and about forty other thing! ?" Yes, sir. 1 guaranteed it." I had a torpid liver. Went to three different doctors and all of them aaid ahi wai torpid. I paid yon SI for a bottle." Well ?" VvVII. she didn't cure. Didn't h are no mort effect than water. I want my money back." Gentleman I" exclaimed the fakir, at tie looked around on tbe crowd, "yon have heard what thin man tayt. Hi calls mj South American elixir a 'fraud' because il didn't cure hit liver trouble." No ; it didn't ! " shouted Ihe farmer. Then let at aae why. Did yoa eat pork?" No, air." " Bleep on a feather bad ?" "No, air." "Drink tea or coffee?" " No. air." " Take plenty of exwoiae? " 1 Yet. tir." Have a bath onct or twioe a weak 7 " Yet, sir." Go to bad early T ,' Yet, air." 1 Now then, my friend, aniwer me one more qnition. What wai tbe state o! roar mind while taking my elixir?' "P arty fair." " Weren't yon engaged to a girl ? " Y-et.air." ' And didn't the give yon. the ihake ipeek right up now." " She the married another man, etammered the farmer, ai he tried to get out of the crowd. " Ah ! I knew it ! Gentlemen, behold the conspirator --the assassin tht Bhylock He it in love. Hii liver it torpid. Ht on) a bottle of my elixir. It is warranted to straighten the kinks out ot a torpid livtr at the rate of forty kinks an hoar . bat doee he givt it a fair show ? No, gentle- men ! Tbii fiend in human form pursues hii fair victim He often her hii heart, bnt ibe won't have il. Hi persists. She still refuses. He finally loees her. Emo lion bang* hit liter from port to starboard adds to tht number ot kinkt wobbles all over Ontario, and than be callt mt a Hwindler because I haven't cored him. Gentlemen, who it tbe swindler -Ihe arch fiend ?" The crowd cheered him again and again, while Ibe farmer made all haute to get ont of tight, and after peace had been rettored the fakir held op one of the bottles and aid : " Now, than, who taket the first bottle 7 Compounded by a South American hermit from herbs and roots grown in a mytter loot valley and I'll give 1100 for any com plaint it won't oare. This it my twenty third farewell tonr and the sales have been 40.000.000 bottles. Patented in every country on earth and the recipient of lixty four royal decorations, bottle and wbo taket York Su. ' in I v a dollar a the flral?" New ABtl-MndeaU tiiub. The young ladiet of Bethlehem, in thii .at*, have organized and anti-students' olub, the ebjrct of which it to disoounte anoe the attentions of students, on the ground that they are gay deceivera and delight in breaking ftmicine heart! and blasting matrimonial bopea. That the study of Ihe classics and of mathematics should conduce to such fickleness U a matter of surprise ; and the subject it en- titled to Ihe serious consideration of the triendi of higher education. It may be, however, that the girli themtelvee an partly responsible for this condition of tffairt. A cap and a gown sometimes at- tract silly little inothi, juit at a naval or military uniform doet ; and in the con- sciousness of power wingt are sure to be linged. There are doubtless good young men in Bethlehem inside ai well ai out- aide of college. Oive them a ohanot, girls. Record. Most Blaaae BlmMlC. New York HeraU : Mr. Hliploby Wall, madam, yon made a fool of me when I married yon ; that't dead aura. Mra. Hliploby Why, Nioodemut, long before we weie married yon alwayi boasted that yoa were a self made man. So don't blame me. Tht banana plant hai been found to oon- lain a greater quantity of pure fibre than any of Ibe other nomeroai vegetable duols used for paper making. pro- Oil A OK* V M HJBCT. * .in. Uue. r aa* ijnalnt BfferU of Obltami Buffalo tt'eiti : Bimplt scriptural quota lions were once not considered somcien for inscriptions, and graveyard poetry wi of mort importance than al preeent. Fo lowing are a few whiob were evident! " original" : Here Use tbe bcdjr of Deborah Dent ; biie lacked u|> ber bouli and away she went. A moil indecorous proceeding on the par of the woman with the demure name. Another equally flipaant inscription it Here lies tbe l.oov of Mary Gray ; She would If slie could, but she coold not stay fche had two bad lvg and a baddub cougb , liar lugs it was that carriad ber off. After all, moat people are carried off b their legs, though not precisely in that way A really clever inscription ia thai foun on a photographer'! tombstone : Here 1 lie taken from life. Another bright and concise bit is foun upon the tomb of a hatband and wife in French cemetery : I am anxiously eipeeting vou. A.D. 1837. Herat am!-A.U. 1MT. A reprehensible play upon names it : Here Uee the body of Solomon Podd. Who abulled oat bis soul and went up to God hven more irreverent is the following : Here lies the body of old Cregter. Wbo bail a inouth from MT to ear. Htranitar : Hep lightly o'er the sod. For il be y ani you're gone by ! Here lies tbe Smith to wit Tarn Gouk, His father, and bis milber, W Tarn and Jock, and J .u and Nool. And a' tbe Gouks IbailUwr When on ths yird Tarn and bis wife Greed desperate ill wl liber. But without n dm or strife They take their uap tbesjilher Tht above taggeitt the ditoord that only died out with tbe ttrain of life. Hen- lies John Meadow, Who passed away like a abadow. N. B. His name wai Field, but it would no rhyme. Tbii wat intended to be solemn, bu tome way it iin'l. Wield, shield or yiei< would have rhymed with Field, but evi dently Ihe poet wat " stuck" on shadow. Here rests In silent clay Mils ArabelU Young. Who oa tbe tUst uf May Began to hold ber taogne. Arabella should rite and haunt thit poet Hers lias Hanarst Bexton. Wbo never did aught to vex one; Not like the wuuian under the next ton* Margaret must have fixed thit up b if ore the died. The " ruling passion " is apparent in the lollowiog : 1X09. Alexander UeOeu, Chief Constable. Burling. Oar life is but a winter day. borne only hrrakfast and away; Others to diuovr stay And an full fed. Tbe oldeet man but saps Aud goes lo bed. Lane i bis dsbl That lingers out tbe day. He that goee soonest Has tbe Teaat to pay. i-. i . i ot -,.!>, Mr. Peter MoGlsshan, a well known hootch reporter, wai run over by a train and killed near Perth on the 90th nit. The Cameron Highlander! celebrated tbe anniversary of Tel-el- Ktbir at Edinburgh ~a>itle on Saturday, tbe lath alt. At a special meeting of the Town Conn ^il of Glasgow on the 19lh alt., it wai reeolvsd to confer the freedom of the city upon Lord K jstbery. The Rev. John U'Neill.of Regent Square bnrch, London, preached to abont S.6XK eople in the Grand Hall of the Edinburgh inibiiiop on the 14th nil. A stained glais window hai been placed n St. Giles' Cathedral, Edinburgh, to the memory of the late Mrs. Cameron Leei. L he inbjtot it the Christian virtues. Mr. Thomas Nelson, of Friars' Carte, >amf nee, died there on the I'.'th oil. in hit I th year. Mr. Nelson had a lusceatfnl mtineei career ia Carlisle, where ha owned arge marble works, and wat for several ears Mayor of the oily. The late Rev. Or. Robert Slevanaon, Dairy, Ayrshire, bequeathed 2,500 owardt the endowment of Watt Church here ; 3 500 to the fnndt of Keralend Barony Church and school ; and 1,000 to he 1'niversity of Glasgow, besides smaller tJMatJb Tbe death il announced of Mr. Oeorge 'ousio, formerly one of the Magistrates of :dinburh, whioh took plaoe on tbe 17th ill. at his retidenoa, 5 Branlifield Terraoe. Ir. Cousin wat born in Leitb in 1907, and tad jail entered upon his 84th year. 1'atrlak Allan Krater, of Hotpitalfleld, ear Arbroath, died on Ihe 17lh nil after a long illness. He for many years took a rominent part in public bmineas in the xmnly of Korfar, and wai known ai an irtist tnd a patron of art. He wat a native f Arbroath, and wat born in 1813. In Dundee Mr. W. E. Baxter's will hat iern published. Mrt. Baxter gele the in- ereit of 50,000, Ibe contents of the ansion houses of Klnoaldrnm, love- eighty, Kilmaron or Atboliff, and poaaet- ion of Inverarity or Atholiff. The herita- le property goee lo the ions, and there fa legacies to the daughters and several servants. Headers will regret lo hear of tbe death n tbe 1Mb. alt., at Edinburgh, of the Rev. Lailet Rogen, IX O., LL. D., wbo in bit atriolio labors lo perpetuate the memories f Booltitb heroes had made himaelf nown to all Boatohmen both at home and broad. That be had constituted hit life itsion, and in connection with it he about welve yeara ago spent several montbt in lit country and Canada. Ha wat a ton ot le Rev. James Rogeri. and wai born in pril, 1836, at Danmo, Kifeshire. A PreeslBf Invitation. He - I tee yoa are fond ot autumn leaves, [its Breezy. She -Yet; there it a world ot romanoe me in the colored leaf. He Can we not share the romanoe be- ween us ? Bhe -Yet. Mr. Kreihly , I should be de. hiivl. Come around this evening and til n the family bible. Judge. -Long haired children are not at ubiqni- oat at formally. Tangled curia and rimped treaaei have oome to be regarded rnoag Ibe loxnrite and vamtiee thai amper oomfort and oonvsnienoa. A IALB AKO HABTABD OAeXBV ow a HatebeJI M.tch Wee UM Waw. Of all games in which I have played, the) meat remarkable for a audden revulsion ot feeling wat one between Harvard and Yale plaved apon Jarvis Field, ia June ot 1882. Yale went first to Ihe bal bat failed to toore. Harvard followed suit. In tbe> second inning, a muff by the Harvard tiret- baae man followed by tbs Yale catcher 1 ! making a " two-bagger " hit gave Yelt a ran. Oar happiness wae snort lived, bow/- ever, for in the third inning Harvard madsj two runs, followed by another ia the fifth. Yale scored one in the seventh, bnt Har- vard matched it with one in tbe eighth, ao that we began, the ninth with Harvard four to V ale's two. I think we bad not tbe leata* bopeof winning. I remember feeling, ae we came in foe Ihe ninth inning, that this defeat would settle our chaiiaesof tbe ohampionahip, anal thinking bow the crowd of boys who, at I knew, weie sitting on the Yale fence await- ing the newt, would hear it and dwindle) away in silenoe to their rooms. Oar ftrsjk man at tbe bat in the ninth inning went oat quickly , and oar catcher followed. with tbe same result. Wiloox, tbe laot man on our batting list, oame to tht be,!. Two men oat, two rune to reach even a tie, and three to win! I noticed that the crowd wai leaving Ibe field, and that the; young raioal wbo bad charge of our bate was putting thorn into the bag. Here, yoa ! stop that '." cried I, for we all were superstitious abont packing up the ball before the latt man wai oat. Besides, I wat) the next batter, if WUoox should by any chance reach hit bate, and I wanted my bat. " Two strikee," I beard ihe umpire call, and then at the next ball, io my great joy, ' Take your base," aad Wiloox trotted away to first. I remember ibinking how much I would <<ive for a jome run, and then there oome a good ball oet off my thonlder, and I hit it with aJl my power. It went between third and short slop on a swift drive, bat bounded aigb, at I afterward learned, for I weal meanwhile running at any beat ipeed toward! Aral. Wbeo I wae ufteen feet from that base, I aaw the baseman give a tremendous amp up into tbe air and I knew somebody lad made an overthrow. How I ran then I for every baee I pa seed I knew wai OB* nearer to tying the score. At I oame daab- ng patl third-bate, I taw Wiloox joat ahead of me, aad we orotmd the home- plate within three feet of each other. Oar icxl batter took bit baee on poor pitching and ttole second , the next fallowed with a -bit paet second which brought the irst runner home with the winning roxu rVe then went into the field, pal three harvard men oat and won the gam* probably half tbe seven thousand were already on their way home) with a victory for Harvard in their mind*. Walttr Camp.it St. Ntelulat for Octobtr. A Cabman Oplaloa of Woiurn. Said an old cabman : " 1 have standing in Forty second street here sinoe 867. and never have I had an extra tan ent piece from a woman. They an all alike and their name U olota. I never dri re one that she doesn't want to go like an mgineer. and if I demand extra pay for the) ime made over the road tbe will bold baofc and fight with her month every time. They all want thetr money's worth. If thejy agree lo travel at mile rales and doubt my elimate of tbe distances I have to wait rhile they go into a drag store or telegraph ffioe for points, and then I loee more tune baa the difference amounts to. If theij lire me by tbe hour they will bold Ihe cab ill the full hoar ii up. I never knew oom t them to cheat in the time, and never net one who paid for a fraction over. A maa ill allow me half an hour or half a dollar jooasionally to gel bacck to the stand, but a woman never payt for anything ahe doesn't et. XToDleea ahe it with a man I doa't, re muoh about carrying bar." New York World. How la Bat Pearaea, " The art of eating a peach" it. it aav one of tbe questions of Ibe day. Lccording to one authority on the etiquette) f the dinner table a peach should be licked with tht fork, quartered, peeled and aten piecemeal. Bnt at to much manipul- ation would evidently leave all tbe juice f Ihe frail on the plate, this method, to be lalatable. requires the courage of ihe yeans] ad v in the story who, al ber first appear - noe at a dinner parly, raited ber dessert Jala with ber two handi and calmly drank he sweet joioe of tbe nectarines. The 'rench rule of eating p : K JI will, there- are, be accepted witb much favor, and bat rule it, " D'y mordre a pleinea dealt)." Pall Uall Budget. A Fool e>t Large. The following letter, dated St. Paul, hat een received at tbe Ifrtt Pm$ offiae, \Vm- ipag: " ST. 1'u i., Ootober. 1890, Dear Sir, ave beard abont Wiompeg, and I am oiog to be there on Ootober 16lb. I am ill known at Jack the Kipper, and I MSI oing lo do tome work there. I am going o kill three women and one man. Look at for me. and don't forget Ootober llith. ACK-THI RjrrKa. Good bye until yon tee It t)tau<l. Much Murdering. Do yoa know what tie dead Willie 7 " asked Ihe minister. Yep. Latin, Greek and Eogliab." K.nnlish T " Yep. Knglish it dead, too. Pa laid yoa murdered il ia your sermon last Sunday." An Alxurd Burlington t'rer Press . Ht (reading) _ - 'hen their lipt met, and She (interrupting) Wai it a protracted eeting, I wonder? Bo great ia the proeperity of the Fint reeb) terian Church al Cleveland, O., that employ! three hard working clergymen. Tbe ol lest man in England, wbo hat j net led at Elgin, attributed hit good heath aad ongevity to oatmeal, whiskey, tobaooo aad reeh air. Justice MoMabon opened the Hruoo ssizes at Walkerton yesterday. A girl of 7, named McDonald, brought an action or ted notion agaiosl a married man named V'illiameon and secured a vsrdiot with f 500 The parties reside in Booth-