The following text may have been generated by Optical Character Recognition, with varying degrees of accuracy. Reader beware!

•V. -4 â- â- Â«â€¢ 1 <« -4. -4 ^ -* % /« I. < % Ik. 4. V J* I*. 4 i t XI ?». ^ •^ 1 1*. 't (^ t (K f' m ^ 'A X â- A Hk â- A i^ 'A- K J*- .A. 44 ;•»». -A. «. M '*> » T^ a 1^ i ^ X ^ flk. '4 «k. â- ^ > -M! "*. â- ^ J*- M Ik. J4 ♦v >♦ l»~ â- * A ^ •po. t A .41k. M J^ H- â- K sm >^ H- ^ 'A â- K .i». (^ ^ ^ A «. â- 4: 4ft ^ 0^ J$ K K It 'A .Ik J*- 0^ n jT M • 'M % Mr » •* <s ^ ♦- % *. JUST IN FUN Don't Worry The head ot the house was read- ing a newspaper article very care- fully. When he had come to the end he remarked to his wife : "Do you know. dear. 1 thmk there's something m what this article says â€" that the cleverness ot the father often proves a stumbling-block to the son." His wife heaved a sigli ot reliet. "Well, thank goodness," she said, "our Bobby won't have any- thing to tall over!" Pick Another The sea was calm and the cap- tain decided it would be a good time to satisfy the cabin boy's de- sire to take the helm. He pointed cut the North Star to the boy, and gave him e.xplicit directions to steer toward it all the time. For a while everything went well, but finally the young pilot got into difficulty. "Captain," he called "I've passed that star, will you please come and pick out an- other?" Worth Disgrace He was once the black sheep of the family. When he had won success he presented himself at home again. He told his father how Fortune had smiled on him; he was earning np io 150 a week. "What â€" a week?" cried his lather. "A week," was the reply. "Then come inside," said dad. "The family can stand a lot of dis- grace for that." Verified Mrs. Jones was very proud of her son, who showed promise as an athlete. "Yes, he must be a very fast runner," she explained proudly to a neighbor. "Look at this news- paper report of the sports yester- day. It says he fairly burned up the track. "And it's quite true," she added, confidentially. "1 went to see the track this morning, and it's noth- ing but cinders." THE SPORTING THING Please; No Whistling!" Close Anyway "Auntie, were you ever proposed to?" . "Once, dear, a getkman asked me to marry him over the tele- phone, but he had the wrong number." Misionderstood Counsel for the defence was cross-examining a wit ess. "You have accoi.nted for youi movements in the early afternoon and evenii.R," he said, "so will vou riease tell the Court what you were doinj; ii. the interim?" "1 didn't go there," replied the nervous witness. "1 was in the drawing room all the time.' Rather Breezy The admiral was e.\an;iniiig his youngest officer's knowledge of nautical matters. "Suppose, young man," he rap- pet- out, "you were in charge of this ship and steaming slowly up the Ganges when you received a wireless message reporting a cy- clone at sea. What would you do?" The young man, somewhat flus- tered, stammered: "1 â€" I'd drop an anchor, sir." "Supposing you received another message half an hour later that the cyclone was over Calcutta What would you do then?" "I â€" I'd drop another anchor, •if." The admiral looked far from sat- isfied. "But suppose it was ten times worse than that. What would you «lo?" The young man strove despair- ingly to think of something bright. At last he whispered: "I'd â€" I'd ^op another anchor, sir " "Good Heavens!" roared the ad- mii'al, "where the douce do vou fet all the anchors?" "And where the deuce, ' the lun- ior officer flmig at him despcfatf. 1y, "do" you get al^the wind?" X THIS CURIOUS WORLD By William Ferguson CHRISTY ONCE WAUCS.O /4 BAr/JF^S IN A SINGLE GAME... AND ONCE WENT ea /A/A//A/&S WITHOUT WAl.KlN6/4A/>^/ T. M. Rta u. •• PAT. orr ANSWERr It means "creek, river, or stream." In Dutch. U. S. ADMIRAL HORIZONTAL 1 Pictured U. S. admiral, , Jr. 1 1 North Amer- ica (abbr.) 12 Dines. 13 Admit. 14 From. 16 Half an em. 17 Encourage. 18 Interdiction. 19 "Cracker State" (abbr.) 20 Pass. 22 Lesser. 24 Leave out. 26 Over (poet.). 28 Fabulous bird. 29 Monkey. 30 Persian governor. 33 Twisted worsted yarn. 36 Upon. 37 CoUar button. 39 Servant. 40 Us. 41 Alkaline solution. 43 Sell. 44 Age. Answer to Previous Puzzle 45 Ask alms. 46 Street (abbr.) 47 Toward. 48 Entangle. 51 Pound (abbr.) 53 Rifle. 55 Either. 56 'Whirlwind. 57 Cereal grain. 59 South Dakota (abbr.). 60 Period of darkness. 62 Rocks. 64 Circular roof. 65 Singing voice. â- VERTICAL 1 Decrease. 2 He is one of the U. S. naval in the Pacific. 3 Labrador (abbr.). 4 Article. 5 Active. 6 DevastatiorL 7 Affirm. 8 Land parcel. 9 His planes to attack Jap ships. 10 Ascetic. 11 His headquar- ters are in Zealand. 15 Obese. 21 Negative word 23 At this time. 25 Miaow. 27 Degree. 29 Operatic air. 30 He won victories in the Islands. 31 An 32 Kind of dog. 33 Vehicle. 34 Female sheep. 35 Tales. 38 Perform. 39 Myself. 42 Is (Latin). 45 Morass. 49 Dry. 50 FestiVcJ. 51 Missing. 52 Diminish. 54 One who uses. 56 Electrical unit 58 2000 pounds. 61 Proceed. 63 Negative 16 wA Ml Via 30 31 36 41 f8 55 60 T!^ ^ â- S.5 49 IS-* 42 Ab (Z W 37 i^-^ iiS 54 ss 27 45 22 I Z8 m W 38 WW: 33 18 â- M- 33 5V 62 8 i 24 23 *«'.!:•;' (;Sw «*7 ?:??S-5 38 f* 19 ,+s 53 63 3^^ 35 40 54 15 VOICE OF THE PRb^ Definition A boarding House has been de- lined as a place where hot vater conies out of tlie cold tap, and cold water comes out oi the hot tap, and nobody ever comes out jf the bathroom. â€" Peterborough Examiner. Good News for Stingers Mosquitoes, bees, sand flies and just ordinary house and horse flies, were no doubt delighted with tho style announcement that bare mid- riffs were to be the vogue for young ladies a* summer resorts. â€" St. Thomas Times- Journal. Smart Fellows A Tokyo paper reveals that the average Jap makes $120 a month and spends $200, which shows how darn'd clever those people are at catching onto the white man's sys- tem. â€" Ottawa Citizen. Heel Marks We all make footprints in the sands of time. But some leave th imprint of a great soul, others the marks of a heel. â€" Edmonton Journal. A Good Kule Another good rule for motorists to observe is that pedestrians should be seen and not hurt. â€" Kingston Whig-Standard. Sure Bet Ten-foot spinach is prophesied by an expert grower in Wyoming. And even at that height, there will be sand right to the top of it. â€" Windsor Star. Kurds and Way The office punster wants to know more about these Kurds in Iran, and their whey of life. â€"Stratford Beacon-Herald. Wrong Method You can't straigliten out the guy by hammering at him â€" that only flattens him out. â€" Edmonton Journal, Chance for 8,000 We read that 8,000 Ontario farms are vacant. .'Vnd yet there are people who say that this is no longer a I^nd of opportunity. We should be interested to see what immigrants from Belgium, Nor- w y and Denmark would do with those farms. â€" Peterborough Examiner. Kilts Remain We e.xpected that to happen. Defence Minister .A.bbott has an- nounced that the kilt will continue to be authorized for walking out purposes, but that battle-dress will be used for operational duty; so the picturesque dress will remain to please all Scots and those who like it, â€" Niagara Falls Review Slap Them Into Jail .K black-market butter dealer hi Montreal was fined $1,000, That is all very well, but a fine alone is not enough for those who make a dirty profit for themselves our o' the butter shortage and obstruc: o'ficial efforts at even distribution. â€" Ottawa Journal. Keep Thnro Busy Judge Joseph Wearing says need today is i sane, nioderil method of dealing with luvenile crime. Greater use of the strap and shorter prison terras wen- sug- gested. The sugge^tion may be all right from a prison angle but the real way to "curb juvenile crime is to start with the parents and then keep the youths so busy at con- trolled activities they will not have time for crime. â€" London. Ont., licho. Not To Be Caught The young politician stood flash- ed â- ^ th pride and happiness as his friends gathered about him to congratulate him upon his nomina- tion to the state legislature. "Were you surprised when they nominated you?" a friend inquire<i. "Was I?" exclaime-^ the not-so- dumb vote-seeker. "I was so sur- prised that my acceptance speech nearly fell out of my hand." â€" Wall Street Journal. Faster Than Nylons A Newark woman wouldn't come out of a burning house be- cause she couldn't find her stock- ings. The firemen, though, had plenty of hose, so she was rescued. â€" Guelph Mercury. And Find It Some men go about looking for temptation to yield to. â€" Brandon Sun. TO BE POPUl hostess, serve Ma House Co£Fee. It contail choice Latin-Americai coffees . . . the finest ob- tainable. It's blended by- experts with traditional knowledge and skill. fROn^^ Instaniine #J TABIETS 7*<» All . •* ONIT *«''' Di KUGSTORES ) MACDONALD'S t Ga^jccda's Sia4ic£cJiGl fmcf^z THE SPOfiTINQ THING / "Hmm â€" guess he got tired of bangin' around!'' REG'LAR FELLERS â€" Alarming Symptoms By GENE BYRNES 4 POP â€" Wrong Audience By J. MILLAR WATT NOT A BUNKIN6, PEKNV IN THREE f MILES OF 'EM/ ML A Sa . 0* 7 wf rJrS ^M j^y^^ f .a!Ct^0&