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^ ^ JUST IN FUN Had It A man consulted a real estate •gent for a write-up of the prop- erty he wanted to sell. When the •gent submitted his dcscript.ons ot the property, tlie owner exclaimed: "Read that again." After the sec- ond rc.^din^{, the owner said: "I don't think I'll sell. I've been lookinf; for that kind of place all my life, but until you read that description I didn't know I had It." AND NO ONE WAS HURT Still Going Round "Well, did you get any surprise presents for your birthday?" "Yes, rather. I got a book from Bill I lent you last year." Which? "Could you pay for an operation if I thought one was necessary?" "Would you think one was nec- Miary if I couldn't pay for it? Extravagant "Weel, Angus," said Donald, 'I hear ye've got married?" "Ay, Donald." "An what kind of wife hae ye got? Can ihe cook?" "No. I don't think so." "No." "Then whit can she do?'* "Man, Donald, she's a grand •inger." "Ach, mon, ye'rc daft," eaid Don- ald in disgust. "Widna it canary hae been cheaper?" Animal Crackers Sure, pin-slTipes are (he latest things." High Finance Little Mrs. Xtwcdde was still rather, stiy aliout asking her luibby for more money, hut the time came when she simply had to. "Jack, dearest," she said at break- fast time, "will you please lend me £l, but only gire me half oi it?'' "Yes, darling," said her husband, puzzled. "But why only half of it?" "Oh, well, don't you see, then you'll owe me ten shillings and I'll owe you ten shillings, so we'll be aquare, won't wc?'' Keep It Up "Now that I've told you about ny past, do you want to marry me?" "Sure." "1 suppose you'll expect me to live it down?" "No!" I'll expect you to live up U. it." Understand Now Visitor: Why is the church bell ringing, Sexton? Sexton: 'Cos 1 he pulling this 'ere rope, mister! In Expectation "What is a debtor?" "A man who owes money." ".â- \n(l what is a rrodilor?" ".\ ni.in who lhi:ii;s he's Roing |i i;i I il i.^i'V " Just That Wife (sorrowfully); "I've just received a letter from poor, dear mamma. She says she is feeling Tery seedy.'*- Husband (with a grunt) : "I sup- pose that means slic Is going to plant herself on us." No Hoarder The banker's daughter threw her •rms around the neck of her bride- groom-to-be. "Oh dear," she e.xdainied, "dad's going to give us a cheque or a present!" "Excellent 1" exclaimed the happy young man. "Then we'll have the wedding at noon instead of two o'clock." "Why, dear?" "The banks close at three!" Froi.. Him "I want something really nice loT a present," explained the shop- per to the assistant. "Tor your husband, madam?" "No, from my luisband," came Ihe reply, sweetly. MP^ 'â- '\tl ii/ifl .-.u' PP^ . i-Knif.tj.i-. •-W .1 jiUliiU.-. .j)i«: ai:..,. i<A !)iiii»> -..oqo? (M ,»ioa -iiii uU .*/. -i' -â- (â- >'. ,jii, jf.U'.iUit.< .....: A':, Know Your Hockey Stars -1 iut.'e, .ti'ixfi hui> ''C This big Dakota plane sits suspended at a precarious angle on houses In Northolt, England, wher« it crashed. Neither passengers of the plane nor residents of the houses were injured. MARY STILL INTERESTED IN PICTURES Despite the fact that she has not been seen on the screen for some years, Canada's own Mary Pickford is still vitally interested in movies^ On the occasion of a recent trip to England. Mary demon- strated her interest by visiting the set of "Great Expectations", the movie that is now delighting audiences throughout Canada. She is s^en above with David Lean, director, and John Mills, who plays the part of Pip in the picturization of Charles Dickens' great novel. RISE OF A NEW STAR Voice of the Press .^ How It's Done There are two ways of acquiring old furniture. You can buy It or raise a family. â€" Hamilton Spectator. A Question of Shape The winning team in the cross- cut saw contest at the Royal Win- ter Fair â€" a couple of the boys from old Kebbec â€" sliced through a 21- Inch log of green maple in a min- ute and 47 seconds. It was nice . going. We knocked one oH last summer in an hour and 47 min- utes. But the saw wasn't in good shape. And neither were we I â€" Ottawa Citizen. Button Collector In his thirty years in the minis- try, an American preacher has built up a world-famous collection of buttons. Somehow this seems a reflection on his congregation. â€" Edmonton Journal. A young gentleman of Great Expectations is fourteen-year-old Anthony Wager, of London, England, who was chosen from a field of over 700 aspirants for the part of Young Pip in the Cineguild adaptation of Charles Dickens' novel "Great Expectations'' which is now being shown in theatres across Canada. An average boy, young Anthony had no previous stage or screen experience but gave such a tremendous performance that he has already been assigned to two other pictures. He is one of the young stars being brought forward by J. Arthur Rank, the British cinema mogul. "What's in A Name?" The modern trend has reached even into the realm of that age- old fraternity â€" the junkmen, says The Vancouver News- Herald. No longer may they be designated as junkmen, for at their convention in San Francisco this month they will be known as the National As- sociation of Waste -Material Deal- era. Aluminum Houses British factories soon will be pioducing an alumininn house every 2!^ minutes; 54, .100 will be completed by next fall; and families can move in with their furniture five hours after the house sections arrive on a vacant site. John Wilmot, Minister of Supply, gave these facts as the lO.OOOtli aluminum house was delivered. Surely Not An expert says we must produce eggs "the way we produce automo- biles." Does that mean the hens must go on strike periodically? â€" Brandon Sun. Wide Highways Modern highways are the kind wide enough for five cars to sniasli at the same time. â€" Quebec Chronicle Telegraph. Costly Sneeze A sneeze, which some would ra- ther have than their breakfast be- cause of alleged benefits to the human system, cost a West Vir- ginian some $1.2J0. He lost con- trol of liis car and smashed into another. There's a time and place for everything â€" including benefi- cial sneezes. â€" St! Thomas Times-Journal. How To Make Fortune A chemist declares that 87 dif- ferent things can be made from coal. There's a fortune for some ingenious fellow who can make a decent fuel of it. ,\ ., â€" Chatham News. Let Her Go .An F.nglish war bride returning to the Old Country because of dis- satisfaction with life in Canada de- clared that .she was "homesick for the siglit of an English dance hall and an English pub." That type won't be missed from this country. â€" Nortlurn Daily News. Secret Is Out A man in \'irginia is !)7 and has never consulted a doctor. Bet he's sick of apples! â€" Peterborough Examiner. Only Time For Action Old men dwell in the past, and young men look to the future, lint wise men know that the present is the only time for action. â€" Fort Erie Times- Review. It has been said that ah earth- quake wouldn't rufile W'alter (Turk) Brodaâ€" and that isn't far __ from the truth. J The happy - go - 1 lucky Leaf n e t - ! minder, who was 1' away . , from the N.II.L, for two â- , scasofis and mcrst I of a third, is back I as large as life I and determined to , regain possession W. (Turk) Broda ,f „,^ V e z i n a Goal Trophy. He's the only Toronto netminder to ever win that award. :» If • Broda, who was born at Bran- don, ^fanitoba, May 15, 1914, got his hockey start in and around that section of the province. Like nine out of ten goalies, he had the net- minding assignrrient thrust upon him. He wanted to play defense but he was too small and it was goal or nothing. So Tafk' guarded the hemp. That was around 1920 and 19.30. By 1933 he had m.ide such strides that he had migrated to Winnipeg to play for the fam- ed Monarch juniors. He was also placed on Detroit's list and in 1934-35 he was workout goalie for the Red Wings. Chuck Gardiner, then acclaimed as the greatest goalie in hockey, was Turk's ido! and he gave the chubby Polish boy some pointers that helped his play considerably. * • * ii'': In 1935-36, the hockey 'fates started to work for Turk. He be- came regular nelmrn^er for- De- troit's minor pro team, the Olym- pics, and it was during tha,t sea- son tliat Conn l Sinythe in(^•&â- ^I<^4• Windsor Arena en a scoutiri.a-i(*- a'giPal-ii mi'ssfoit. Siin'tlie was' there to. look over Earl Robertson â€" but he, wound up with Broda, who stole'^th^ show.' The Turk became Tblronto's custotfran in 1936-37 and remained as such until he. joined the Canadian Arrily in the summer of. 1943. idil-aJ;.'!! oi'T His most snde^s'sful sbason was 1940-41 when fie Won the N^ezina Trophy in rather dramatic fashion. The Turk saemed to be sitting prettji .fori', thfe.inctniinding award ,\yith'pnly four gaiiiefr left to' play that season. He had yielded only 87 goals and .was seven up on Hjs closest rival, .Johnny^. Mowers of the Detroit Tied W'lKS- But . ,^. in the next game, played in Ne\y; York, Broda had one oi those^^ nightmarish experiences. Rangers started throwing pucks past him early and often and the Turk couldn't do anything to stem tb»^, avalanche. Rangers won the game 8-5, and instead of having the Ve- zina Trophy tucked away, Broda was one goal behind Mowers, with each having three games left. * * • Turk yicklcd three goals in his next game. Mowers twcj. ThaA,. put Johnny ahead, with 96 goalS' against Broda's 98. In the next game, Turk held Chicago to one goal, while Vowers was allowing Boston Bruins two. So with one game left. Mowers was ahead, 98 to 99. The Leafs' final game that season was in Chicago â€" and Turk rose to the challenge to blank the ^ Black Hawks, 3-0. . , . Detroit's final game was i not played until a couple of days I later â€" in Boston. Mowers, with' one •' game to go, still had a one-goal edge on Broda. That night the whole Leaf team â€" including a fin-^ gernail-biting Turk â€" watched the » duel for they were in Beantown waiting to start their playoff se- ries with the Bruins. And that night the Bruins smote down tlie Wings, 4 to 1 . . . and .-.n ecstatic Broda left the rink as winner of the Vezina Trophy by the dra- matic margin of 99 goals to 102. In addition to winning the covet- ed cup, Turk was also picked as the league's all-star goalie for 1940-41. He had five shutouts that year. * * ♦ The season before all that hap- pened, Broda had given indication that he had become a big league goalie ... for in 1938-39 he finish- ed the 4S-Rame league grind with a 2.289' goals against average, yield- ing 107 markers all told, and pro- duced eight shutouts. In 10 play- off games that yeai, he kept up hil stellar puck' fending and was beat- en only 20 times. He also came up â- with another pair of shutouts to make \^t total 10 for the season. After winning the Vezina in 1940-41; Tutit kept up his good work in the ensuing season. In 43 games he conceded 130 goals and was runner-up to Frank Brimsek and also the second .all-star team's goalie. In the memorable playoff battle witli Detnoit that year, Turk proved his mettle when he stepped into the Motor City and blanked the Red Wings in the sixth game of that epic series. He had racked up six shutouts in league gamesâ€" bi)t:t^ \T<»«;tbe only one he notch- ed, in the playoffs. It couldn't^ have coVn<i*4t'^'fflore propitious timeâ€" £oB i^f^!<i9',y;t:pf, on from there to take the Stanley Cup in the ereiii'A-'corilfhicV: of all time. Turk was runner-up to Mowers during the 1942-43 season, giving up 159 goals in 50 games--an av- erage of 3.018 per game. That sum- mer he went into the Canadian Army and the same year wound up overseas. He served in Eng- land and Holland and came through unscathed, his only inju- ries emanating from sports com- petition. Playing in a roftball game, he tore ligaments in his ankle slid- ing into third base and spent con- ' s'iderable time in the hospital. Then, just before returning to Canada, Turk stopped a puck with )iis rpp\)t]\ ip a hockev game, lost '"revei'aT"'tee't'!V."- In England, he piayrtHiocfccy wfth the 23rd Field Artillefv. <i,nd later with the 4th ' '"'DivisiSnrArtiltcrv team which won â-  ''?4fle mfipiow.""''"''"'"" 8«^''fn"-hiP''HrbÂ¥- f» feSft'ft. â-  Broda scored nine shutouts, and in an 11- game league schedule hc_^conced- ed only two _gi»a1s. ",â- ] > 1 Broda ifr-'mj^rripd aj^^ has three daughters./. fi;>'BM6ara, Bonnie, and B'eiiX- I ( /. ' He <vorTc£ci..it Conn Smythe s sand pit during the past summer and also, polished up on his golf game, which is the envy of his mates. Rural JourlM^l Says Communism . Enemy of Farmers About Comnu^;ll^!n there is mucn that Americans do not know. We ''do know tjiat. Communists want to â- ', destroy our form ot government. They hate our way of life, says The Farm Journal, Chicago, Why they desire so intensely to uproot a-systeitt t^at has accom- plished so much, and w'hy they are willing to work so furiously to crejite copfusion and disturbance, are mystiries to most of us. \ Communists, persistently worm tKe»i«way into farm organizations, push into radio and publishing, sneak into government jobsâ€" evcry- v;here with the same vicious in- tent. Always the purpose is to create and fau discontent and dis- satisfaction. Whatever is against a' stronger I'nited States they are Tor. , , „ vail"' .(!':i? locY ,• . . The Communist takes advantage of ev^rj; crack in tj|)(i^,^rmor of AiwerKahism. H»- is -forrstrikes be- cause they slow iip production. He is for big spending because it weakens tlie nation. He agitates ..for go^erivmeut to take.. care of everything, because he knows that government bungling gets discon- tented groups to play his game. He never iiests..^,^^,^^^,,.^,,,. He will even support some things that are right, because he specializes in fooling well-meaning honest Americans into aiding his effort to make chaos. If you catch him at any of his tricks he screams that you are a red-baiter and a dirty Fascist, plot- ing to fool the common people. One thing .\mericans do know about Comnuinism. It is a treason- ous enemy for which there can be only one treatment. That is to recognize its ideas and acts, and stamp them down ruthlessly. 1 4 i â- V \ ^'