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12 THE NEW TANNER THURSDAY, AUGUST 24, 2006 + * . ` 4 3 & 1 " * 3 4 ) 0 1 105 Alma St. Rockwood Tel: 519-856-2564 Fax: 519-856-9657 1-888-537-7953 ??????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????????????????????????? ?? ???? ????????????????? ??????? Second Hand Shop ?????????????????????????????? ?????????? ????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????? Open Tuesday - Saturday 11-5 CASH OR CHEQUES ONLY PLEASE. LOTS OF DESKS Everything you need for a new school year! ????????????????????? ??????????????????????????? ??? ????? ????? ????? ???????? ??? ??? ?????? ??? By Rebecca Ring This newspapers office has been receiving an in- creasing amount of police reports where the victim of spousal abuse is the male partner. Earlier this week, Wellington OPP reported an incident in Erin where a where a 46 year old male was allegedly assaulted by his 44 year old female part- ner. Charges were laid. This paper recently print- ed an article on resources available to female sur- vivors of spousal abuse. Where do adult males go who are in the same boat? The short answer is they seem to be on their own. This reporter could find no services anywhere near Wellington County dedi- cated to male survivors of spousal abuse. In an emergency, a man fleeing domestic violence could go to a mens shel- ter such as the Stepping Stone in Guelph or House of Friendship in Kitchener. These are all purpose shelters for men. They do provide caseworkers to aid individuals in their unique situations. There are several counselling centres where a man could get one-to-one counseling, on a sliding fee scale based on income, such as Family Counsel- ling and support Services in Guelph. Ron Flemming of House of Friendship said that they offer assistance in finding housing for low-income individuals and families. Fleeing domestic violence is a high priority situation, regardless of gender. He said that most men do not talk about why they are in the shelter and cannot guess at how many are fleeing abuse. He guesses that there are a lot that feel ashamed and never tell. Problem under reported Of all the community services contacted, there is a consensus among the work- ers interviewed that this problem is under reported and under serviced. Many had anecdotes of men be- ing abused but not wanting to come forward. There is no government funding to create awareness, provide counselling or emergency programs and no safety net for these men. Elizabeth Bresnahan of Victim Services said they are seeing more and more cases where the victim is male. Police are specially trained to handle domestic violence without judgment, and are taught to treat all cases seriously, regardless of the gender of perpetra- tor or victim. However, Bresnahan said that many men do not come forward for help because of cultural stereotypes of men as strong and in control and women as weak and vulnerable. Many men do not speak up for the same reasons as many women. They are embarrassed and afraid that nobody will believe their story. Bresnahan said that men are certainly able to use a program called DVERS (Domestic Violence Emer- gency Response System). It is provided by the Rural Womens Support Program and Guelph Wellington Women in Crisis, the OPP, ADT Security, Bell Canada, Guelph Police, and Victim Services. If a person is in a high-risk situation, where he or she may be hurt or killed, DVERS will install an alarm system that he/she can set off. This alerts the OPP who will arrive ASAP, ready to deal with the situa- tion. This service has so far never been used by a man. To reiterate the past article on spousal abuse, there are four main types: physical, emotional (including verbal and psychological), sexu- al and financial. Physical abuse includes hitting, slap- ping, restraining, pinching, tripping and confinement. Emotional abuse includes name calling, extreme irrational jealousy, con- trolling everything from how to dress to associa- tion with friends or family, threatening family or pets, ignoring him/her, destroy- ing property, especially favourite items, threatening deportation for an immi- grant, threatening to out a person in a same-sex relationship, using vulner- abilities as put-downs or threats, not allowing or forcing religious practises, and threatening suicide if the person leaves. Sexual abuse includes forced intercourse or other sexual acts, harassment, leering or any sexual behav- ior that the abuser knows makes the person uncom- fortable. Financial abuse includes controlling access to money, including the persons own paycheque, not allowing any financial decisions or discussion, and denying funds for normal purchases. This severely limits the persons access to transpor- tation, including owning a car or hiring taxis. All support workers who commented agreed that this gap needs to be ad- dressed. Abused men need to be reached out to and validated, supported and helped. They should have the same services available to them as women do. Most attribute the lack of services to cultural stereotyping, lack of funds and the fact that the need continues to be greater in numbers for women, as they still repre- sent the majority of abuse survivors. Many men dont come forward for help due to masculine stereotypes Domestic violence against men growing, often ignored problem Wellington OPP, assisted by fellow officers from the OPPs drug enforcement section and aviation services lo- cated eight outdoor marijuana grow operations in cornfields and bush areas of Guelph-Eramosa, Puslinch and Pilkington township last Wednesday, August 16. Officers said they located 1280 marijuana plants, some up to nine feet in height and mostly in the budding stage. All the plants were collected and sent off for destruction. Police estimated the street value of the seized marijuana at $1,280,000. Police raids get 8 outdoor grows