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Bills daughter Kim writes just for the helmet I have been under the weather hare a columnist this week my daughter Kbn So the Bill Smiley column wert is by Kan Smiley who better than I da anyway by Kim Smiley Some people actually pay money to their brains teased Compilations of quizzes and men Lai challenges can be found in any large book store usually under the Games section next to Humor In smaller establishments brain leaser books which always assure buyers that correct solutions signify genius are lumped together with Humor a connection that escapes the MENS A hopefuls who buy them But why pay money for what can gel free horse sense inquires The following brainteaser free of charge was recently seen in the window of a Variety store in a small Canadian town Please do not wear helmets inside store Weve heard of having to wear certain Items of apparel in stores like shoes but not being allow to wear something This new and almost as inventive as a sign currently adorning a gas station in that same small town Free hat with exhaust system inspection In my day not so long ago it would have been a simple Free glass with fill up But what nch opportunities for the flex ing of the imagination this gas station af fords lucky passersby What land of hat one wonders One size and color only or a smorgasborg of hat choice A hat you wouldnt be seen dead in cynics will con clude reasoning that the use of the term hat rather than cap means the bonus offer couldnt be some variation on the tunelessly fashionable baseball cap The speculative on even this modest but free brainteaser could keep one mentally Fonda fit for a week How much more so the intriguing Please do helmets in store I put my brain on the wrack Here are the only reasons I could come up with for the nohelmet rule In the Variety store They range from dumb to really dumb Hardness of helmet causing potential damage to perishable goods and persons Potential theft there being room to tuck stolen goods In space between top of head and helmet 3 Managerial prejudice against motor cycle drivers as opposed to say construc tion workers Notice the sign specifics helmets not hard hats Related to above simple helmet phobia on the part of the store manager Isnt there something frightening about the partially disguised face and overly- protected head of the helmet wearer Store managers plan in event of holdups is to club be keeps behind counter on thiels bead Manager lacks imagination to devise alternate plan and therefore forbids helmets store Potential use of helmet as weapon helmeted customer enraged at rising costs charges bull like at store keeper Store manager is in league with gas station owner offering free hat with ex haust system inspection Hats offered are in fact cheap Taiwan- made helmets While motorcyclist leaves his helmet draped on handlebars to dash into store for a Coke gas station owners thug steals helmet and fouls up exhaust system My own mental system exhausted I of fered the list to my family for inspection Discussion settled chiefly around possibili ty Number Two potential theft They decided that the purpose of the sign in the window must be to prevent someone from entering the store with a helmet tucked nonchalantly under his arm then furtively placing a can of beans or a pound of bacoo on his head quickly donning the helmet and walking through the cash coolly buy ing a pack of gum just to cover up you understand Against my protests that allowable purses bags or large pockets would serve just as well and be less pain they stood fast Well I finally just asked went down to the store and under the pretext of coolly buying a pack of gum asked the burning question How come you cant wear helmets in the store She laughed a little Well they garble you know But they Just have those mouth guard things dont they I made mouth guard gestures thinking of kids hockey helmets of years ago No she explained they have face visors A lot of people keep their visors down and we cant make out what theyre saying IlsisS88ol GEORGETOWN 8775266 ACTON 8532219 ow charge your classified to your Charsex Account Ask for details DAD LINCOLN mercury Georgetown Acton Wednesday Aug 29 1984 Check Your Ada For Accuracy On The First Insertion The Georgetown Independent and ihe Acton Free Prat cannot be responsible I or the coal than on incorrect Insertion Any errors In the Classified Sections thou Id be to the attention of the Classified Department attar the tint insertion menta to the degree the error reduced of ad Call 8776266 or 8532219 pm Monday to Friday I Births DADDY LITTLE Brian and Donna thank God for the happy and safe arrival of their frit child Danielle born Wednesday August 15 at General Hospital weighing lbs Proud Grandparents arc Paul and Martha Leu en and Nancy Special to Tony Lopes Robin Ewort and the entire OB staff Maurice and Gall nee Savage arc pleated to announce the birth of their daughter lbs born August at General Hospiial A baby sister for Jeffrey Proud grandparents are Simeon and Helena God In and Bruce and Pearl Savage all ol Georgetown HUNT Peter and Carole are very proud to announce the arrival of their first child Bradley Peter born August weighing lb Second grandchild for Brian Maureen Saxon of Acton and sixth grandchild for Cecil Dorothy Hunt of Milton Thank to Kumar and the staff at Georgetown Hospital and a very special thank you Dr Ford I LEE Millar would like to announce the birth of our new bom daughter Rose weighing at birth lbs 9 given to me by my wife Penny Rose born Sunday August at a a Is the first grandchild Mr and Mrs Stuart Millar and the 3rd grandchild Mr Charlie We give love to the new member the family LOUTH Gary and nee are pleased to announce the birth of ihelr son Ryan William weighing a lbs on August ISM A for Brendan Proud parents are Mr and Mrs George Louth of Georgetown Mr and Mrs George St Thomas Special thanks to Thompson and the OB stall of Georgetown and District Memorial Lynn and John ore pleased to announce the arrival daughter Amanda Louise born on August 14 19M weighing lbs Proud grandparents are Mrs Bessie Fisher Bramalea end Mr and Mrs Manuel Acton Special thanks to Paul and the OB stall at Georgetown and District Memorial Hospital WE Mark and Kelly Inoo Sm lay are delighted to announce birth their third child Bridget Helen on Saturday August at weighing lbs on A new sister for Matthew and Erin A pec ml you to Panabaket and the great OB staff Georu and District Memorial Hospital SPEAKER Bob and Donna ore thrilled to announce birth their first Child Kyle Robert born August at General Hospital weighing 4 lbs 13 on Proud grandparents are George and Betty of and Elmer and Joan Rosiell Acton WAKEFIELD and ere pleated to announce the birth of their first child a daughter Elliabeth born August 23 at Georgetown and District Memorial Hospiial weighing lbs 4 Proud grandparents are Ed and Jean Wakefield and Lome and Ethel Draper all Georgetown Special thanks to Richards and the OB staff of and District Memorial Engtfltnuntt and Doug Harrington of Georgetown are pleased to an the engagement of their youngest daughter Kim Elaine to Cory R adder son of Mary and Jack Windsor Coming Marriage BAXTER Mrs Patricia Baxter is pleased to announce the forthcoming marriage her daughter Lynn Baxter to Patrick Joseph son and Wedding will take place October a at Grace United Church Brampton MR MRS Fred Gordon are pleased to announce forthcoming marriage their daughter Patricia Anne to James ion Mr and Mrs Roy Wedding to September 4pm at St Josephs Church Acton MR AND MRS Hugo Schmidt Gueiph are pleated to announce the form coming marriage their youngest daughter Angela lo Robert Bob Davidson son of Mr and Mrs Alec Davidson Wedding will take place September It in at al St Pauls Lutheran Church In Cornell and the late Gerald pleased to announce trie her daughters Ruth to Roger ion of Rev and Mrs Ronald Toronto and Diana to Mr Edward Francis Gardner ton of Mrs Edith Gardiner Welsh and the lata Francis Gardiner Double ceremony to take plat Saturday September I at George Anglican Church in Georgetown a Coming Marriage EDGAR and Doris MacDonald of Georgetown are pleased to announce the coming marriage ol daughter Jean to Douglas Albert En man son of Albert and Ada of ol Georgetown Wedding to fake place September 1984 at 3 p m Knox Presbyterian Church a Deaths COUPS Josephine on Wednesday August the Peel Memorial Hospital Brampton Josephine Park formerly London and Brampton Wile the late Verdun Coups and loved mother Carole Mrs Peter car ter of Georgetown and loving grandmother Christine and sister late Stan and Harold Glailer Rested at the J S Jones and Son Funeral Home 34 Edith St Georgetown where funeral and committal service was held Friday afternoon at clock Cremation followed in memory contributions to the Canadian Cancer Society would be ap Michael at General Hospital on Tuesday August 1984 Michael years Beloved husband of Maria Dear lather of Bill of Georgetown and Mrs Ranger Acton Rested at Shoemaker Funeral Home Acton on Friday August u at Interment Cemetery Acton GRAHAM Lynne passed away as a result a motor accident on Sun day August the age IS years Beloved daughter of Thomas and Carol Graham of Dear sister Ann end Julia Lee both homo Loved grand daughter Charles Thomson of Acton and Mary Graham Ireland Funeral service was held at The Shoemaker Funeral Home Acton on Tuesday August all pm Interment Cemetery ILTS Alice on Wednesday August the Georgetown and District Memorial Hospital Alice Patterson Glen Williams late Harold Hilts and loved Douglas of Georgetown Karen Mrs Michael of Glen Williams Hal of Georgetown and Colleen Glen Williams Loving grandmother Adam Jeff Jason Lindsay Dear sister Dune Patterson Ann Robb Lilian Rosle and the lole Patterson and Rested at the J 5 Jones and Son Funeral Home St Georgetown where funeral service was held Friday August 24lh Interment Glen Williams Cemetery In memory contributions to the Canadian Cancer Society would be HUTCHINSON William James Cheltenham it is with deep regret the announces his passing at Tho Toronto General on Wednesday August alter a brief illness Dear brother of Betty Mrs Anna Mae Mrs Eric Mrs John Georgeiown Claro Albert Beloved son of the late William and Mae Hutchinson Fondly remembered by his nelces and nephews Funeral services were held at the Ward Funeral Chapel Saturday August Interment Dixon Cemetery IRELAND Roy M on Friday August at and District Memorial Hospital Roy Ireland Glen Williams In tils 58th year beloved husband of Dorothy Foster and dear father Larry Karen Brown Sherry Stephen Dale Gall Campbell and Wayne Dear John Ireland Edllh Phyllis Gould Helen Dion Edna Wilson and Agnes and the late and Joe Also lovingly remembered by his Six grand children Rested at the J S Jones and Son Funeral Home 34 St Georgetown where funeral services held Sunday Interment Glen Williams Cemetery In memory contributions the Georgetown and District Memorial Hospital Foundation would SOROS Julius Joseph- Suddenly at Toronto on Thursday August 1984 Julius Joseph Soros of Acton aged years beloved husband Nina Bcresiovcnko and dear father Connie Brolher Leslie and Betty Rowen both of Brentford Steve ol Ottawa and Louis Germany Rested at the Shoemaker Funeral Home Acton where funeral service was held on Monday I p m Interment Greenwood Cemetery Georgetown Cards Thinks IRWIN The family the late Bernice Irwin would like to thank all their friends relatives and neighbors for flowers cards and charitable contributions at the time her passing Also thank you Georgetown Volunteer Ambulance Georgetown and District Memorial Hospital Landry Thompson and nurses Also Rev Jim Boyies lor his comforting words J Jones and Son Funeral Home tor kindness to our family Frank Irwin and I would to thank my family lor the wonderful birthday party they save me and to my many friends tor coming with their cards and best wishes to help make it a great day i and God Bless you Dora Kennedy LEUENBERGER Mr and Mrs Brian Leuenbcrger would Ilka to give special to the excellent and care given to both my wile and our child by the entire Ob naff Including the labour and delivery staff at Etoblcoke General Hospital Special thanks to Tony Lope and Robin Thanks IE HENDERSON Mathilda Jane Tilly In mother and great who passed away August 1976 Our hearts still ache with sadness And silent tears stilt How Whet it meant to lose you Mom No one will ever know When a day Is sad and lonely And everything goes wrong We seem to hear you whisper Cheer up and carry on Every time we see your picture You seem to smile and say Dont cry Im only sleeping We will meet again some day We love you Mom Sadly missed and lovingly remembered by all her family LEUENBERGER Mrs I wish express my appreciation to all my and friends tor all the gills prayers an company during my lengthy stay In hospital OUR sincere thanks to relatives neighbours St Joseph CWL Legion Ladles Auxiliary Acton Firelighters Assoc Rolling Room at lor cards lower boxes and home baking we received time our recent surgeries Special thanks to and Wong Hobson Sincerely id Helen Fowler Gone but not forgotten I Lovingly remembered by and Michael Vickie Jenny MYERS In loving memory a dear mother Margaret Though her smile Is gone forever And her hand we cannot touch Still we have so many memories Of the one we loved so much Her memory is our keepsake With which we II never part God has her In His keeping We have her In our heart remembered by Brian Lon and Jill Myers In loving memory Of my dear wife Lydla who passed August 1933 Sadly missed along life way Quietly remembered every day No longer in our life to share But In our hearts she always there Always remembered by husband Monica and Sheila Sue Desmond and grandchildren STUTTARD Bud in loving memory a special dad and granddad who passed away August 28 Passing time Our love for him Love Bonnie Linda and Clark and family Allan Kill Coming DOG OBEDIENCE CLASSES Starting Sept 20th at Stewarttown Hall ftagiiterMy Course 8772465 HUM OF norm cams of Supply Teachere Meetjig A meeting of supply teacher serving Mil ton ActonGeorgetown School llM Coming HALT0H HILLS CLUB Do rou warn id lira it Dub our guut en Sept 10 Glen Town fill Come torn it lire meeting of the yen a Break lei more tfifDrnimon KEY CONCEPTS OF SMALL BUSINESS the Federal Business Development Bank will sponsor four weekly sessions at the Georgetown Public Library beginning September from course fee is end you can register at the Georgetown Library 2nd ACTON Trinity Beavers Cubs Scoots Registration One evening only Thurs Sept Acton NEW season beginning have a ball meat new newcomers welcome bowling Icaoues to suit everyone from years old to years young tree Instruction special youth C program tournaments national championship crests awards prizes parlies ladies afternoon and evening mens mixed young adult golden age leagues register now at Georgetown Bowl Soulh Vm REGISTRATION for Glen Williams Brownies Guides Pathfinders Beavers Cubs and Scouts September St Albans Hall Glen Williams REGISTRATION for Beavers Cubs Scouts Venturers Rovers Hall Thursday Septi THE ACTON YMCA Registration tor fdll programs Tuesday September a m to m Thursday September a m to Saturday September 10 a to 2 p For Information about programs call 1070 Tuesdays and Thursdays between 10 a m d2pm in ACTON SENIORS RESIDENCE NEW SERVICE DAY CAKE taSBHOR Hour to suit Good TV 1 3 now interviewing now people lor Special TV Studio training to act In TV SonosTV Part time All ego For your Studio call dial BOWLERS WANTED lor Monday Night Bowling League Weekly raff I Strike Pools Please call at Bill at 877 fall is the best time to plant Double a second annual per cent off tale All trees and shrubs mites west Acton on FAMILY neighbors and friends bid farewell to Joan and Elmer as they leave Acton to take up residency at Forest Estates Woodstock May you both many years of good luck good health and happiness Please return visit us regularly Family friends and neighbors THE SALVATION Army pick up of appliances In working order end good used furniture Phone Tuesday to Saturday from am for arrangements ANTIQUE AUCTION SALE for MARY MAX STOREY at their farm on COUNTRY ROAD mete Eartof Harris St extension on MONDAY Labour Day EPT3t1h30aun Include Flat Back Dry Sink Blanket Soxes Tablet Chain Wicker Doll Buggy ScooterWagonetc GLASS CHINA Include Cranberry PlcM Cruet and other pace of Cranberry Ho water pitcher aaveral piece of Royal Carnival Red White ate I Flo Blue etc etc OIL LAMPS Include Cranberry Lamp a Cranberry Bracket Lamp CROCKS Include Goold Brentford C W Pattin Co Toronto C A Co Gueiph Stratford etc etc ALSO Watches Com Ore MA Toyi a Large Selection Primitive Usual Terms DON COLLING AucttonMr ID Notices Ess Would anyone witnessing an at me Ion Main and Mill Acton on Saturday August 25 between a bicyclist and two ladles or have any Information concerning the cyclist please contact Mrs Fred Acton 2353 Auction Sales CENTURY FARM AUCTION SALE For Doris Lewaon Sept 3rd ft Location At farm cornet of Stoelos Ave Line ton east ol Furniture Ornate solid walnut pc dining room suite choirs out toble bullet door chine cabinet C 1905 arm chair 5 choirs matching table 3 mat prossback chairs pine wardrobe with brass pulls 18G0 pino corner cupboards C I860 pma spool bed pine harvest 36 X pine open pine flour bin pi no bench Boston rockers rocker Vict walnut rocker armchair walnut china cabinot china cabinet maple dresser with wicker at bottom minor Vict oak drawer dresser Vict meplo dresser with brass pulls Commode drawer doors walnut desk custom made from old oak school desk 2 drawer desk table small parlour bookcase with shelves doors about of best pic lures I have in one homo include picture P Robertson Co lion 11 Leaf frame perfect framed sampler ate modern drawer filing cabinet typewmer child s eloctnc Silvartono organ Find lay stove with thermostat love seat davenport Now Haven 8 day striking shell clock Unit I hanging lamps of Ataddm lamps is brass lamps 3oillamps wooden paddle lib prints 2 rolling pins Sums 1 gal floral jug Welding gal jug 15jugsff crocks venous sues Bestovor crockery bod warmer ciockoiy bod pan chamber basins soap dish water pot china salt box a largo often old sealers includes h gal Mason 1658 gal Boover gel Lightning wire top Atlas wire top or Vi Fruit old milk bottles Milton Da etc sad irons handle partial string of boils set of brass chimes good horse collars liar new charcoal cutter heater brass bell old cameras cards 10 or old tins Ocean Bland tea Macintosh toffee chow tobacco etc largo brass kettle Fairbanks store Kales with brass scoop small large iron sugar kettles iron implement seat ping bushel moasura wooden bucket of pine tool boxes wooden clamps log tongs tongs largo adze wooden wagon joci old barn lanterns hey kmFe pr cant hooks 3 gall sticks pr crosscut saws circular saw blades hayfork cars 2 coal utiles pi neck yokes sals doubletrees 3 sets hemes row turnip 21 walking plough ox well pump map Cenadn C 1916 X map of Br Empire Ontario partial spinning wheel collection of licenso plates to China etc Royal water pitcher fancy cups t saucers Prussia shaving mug 1937 Coronation plate Gorman china toothpick holder egg cup pes Blue Mountain pot tery Shalbourno milk glass tray milk glass dresser box glass hen on nest very old goblet covered comport with dove covered candy dish with dove tin ml opalescent candy dish syrup jug vases cruets glasses juicers glass pieces pc silver tea or 8 other good silver pes curling tongs hat pins straight raior 5pc set etc Item 197G Capri with covet good blade for tractor good old blacksmith forge coal accessories anvil blacksmith made hinges Mil of beam scale crate tor weighing sheep or hogs large insulated heated dog house wringer washer humidifier pr of panel doors with hardware several pine doom various sues It good picket fencing pino shutters ex Owner or Auctioneer not responsible or chlent Sale day Auctioneer Note- The family became owner of this farm in It hat been sold Mr Mi Lawson have puichased a house in Milton Term Cash or Cheque with I Lunch a liable Auctioneer Ward Brownridga Phone GRAY tabby cat tost in area Line Sunday August II very friendly Reward Wanted Scrap Iron Can Tmdti or a