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Lonely people have unconstructive attitudes ByJOHNEBERLEE Lonely peoples attitudes may be preventing them from forming satisfying relationships Bays a Thunder Bay psychologist Ken an associate professor at University suggests lonely peo ple are less trusting and more cynical than lonely people Moreover theyre less accepting of people who escalate the level of intimacy during casual con These traits would appear to stand in the way of them establishing and maintaining friendships he says People who assume others wont fulfill pro mises to meet for drinks or a movie for example may be pro ne themselves to avoiding such social situations Similarly people who dislike others for baring their souls without an invitation may lack the necessary skills to make close friends out of casual acquain lances Lonely peoples unconstructive attitudes were revealed in a survey using subjects selected from among introductory psychology students Rotenberg identified the most and least lone ly individuals this group by having everyone fill out the UCLA Loneliness Scale a questionnaire that measures peo ples satisfaction with their rela tionships In one study he compared the behaviour of lonely and lonely female students while playing Prisoners Dilemma a twoplayer contest which has elements of cooperation and com petition in it In each round op posing players separated by an opaque glass layer pushed either a competitive red or a cooperative green button If both players pushed the green button they won 15 cents each explains If both players pushed the red button they won only cents he adds And if one player pushed the red while the other pushed the green the competitive player who took 25 cents was the only winner Clearly one person can sue ceed at the others expense But if everyone cooperates then they all come out ahead To determine how trusting his subjects were Rotenberg paired each student in turn with a confederate disguised as a dent He also provided an inter com so players could state their intentions beforehand When pressing the buttons his subjects always went first Confederates were instructed to press any button regardless of their stated intentions during the first few rounds For the rest of the match they copied what their opponents did playing tit for tat Thus each subject was pit ted against someone who became increasingly predictable as the game unfolded It turned out the lonely sub jects responded more positively to their partners says They were more like ly than lonely subjects to cooperate to press the green button if they said they would By comparison trusting behaviour was far less evident among the lonely subjects perhaps because of very negative events in their past he speculates In a future study well pursue this by examining to what extent feeling of betrayal can lead to loneliness also intends to ex amine in detail the ap of lonely peoples conversational behaviour If I sit down and tell you all my pro blems we have a norm which prescribes that you should reciprocate Society believes its desirable to do so During a preliminary study he found that lonely people approve of others who adhere to this convention This means they particularly disapprove of people who disclose too much when the initial level of intimacy is low They feel that someone who follows up current events gossip with news about their love life is committing a serious gaffe The problem is this attitude dooms relationships from the start Rotenberg argues So long as no one escalates the level of in lunacy in a disclosure a relation ship will always be stuck at an unsatisfying level Canadian Science News The litSIl Store THIS LIVE LOBSTER LB FflESHATLAHTK SALMON STEA LB J STEAKS LB MOORE PARK PLAZA N Georgetown Dnl 4168736122 FREE DAY PASS Drop by lour our dub Diy Put tlw me of out Itctlttei Mutt In IB flit WORK THAT STEVEN C FOSTER BA LLB BARRISTERS SOLICITOR 37 MAIN ST SOUTH GEORGETOWN ONT L7G 3G2 8734961 fax 8734962 PHOTO SPECIAL Passport Photos WE KENT VIDEO CAMERAS R775Q45I Fried Community Service Bulletins Register Your Hero And Receive Your Purchases EMERALD ISLE BEDROOM GALLERY SHOAL If you are a non profit or service club or chant or church group and would like us lo publish your com unit service announce ment of community interest call us at during regular office hours There is no charge for this service to Hills com mum tv groups The deadline for submissions is at Noon for publication for the following Deadlines mil not be extended Although we do our best to print all announcements space is limited and there are no guarantees of insertion Happenings Credit Valley Artisans Spring Sale May a 4 pm Cedarvale Cottage Cedarvale Park Georgetown Lioness Club Kllomclre of Coins drive or Kidney Dialysis Vacation Camps We will be holding a May 10 a m 3 at Georgetown Miracle rood Mart Plow Hills Ambulance Service Is willing to provide your school club business or other group with short or long presents on the nature and history of the Service For tion call Phil at 1615 leave a message Summer school of the Performing Arts at Nelson High School July Deadline for registration May tor Information contact St John United Church presents a comedy evening with the Se cond City louring Company May 14 at the John Elliott Theatre Tickets available by calling The Kennedy Connection presents Recycled Toy Sale May at the rear doors gym of George Ken School Acton Parent Child Resource present a Mothers Day May a m 30 at Acton Citizen Band Hall Wallace St tables featuring local artist and craft people AliveMature Driving and In novatlve classroom re training program for mature drivers to improve driving skills Starting In May and June Available through Ac ton Social Services and In formation Centre Call Sue The Kennedy Connection a Recycled Toy Sale r day May the gym at the rear of George Kennedy School St John United Church St is holding a yard sale silent auction and car wash on Saturday May from Bom lo Pro ceeds to local community outreach programs Historical Society presents Eleanor and Will Mclean will recall the history of Balllnafad Wed May at the Balllnafad Town Hall For more Info call Karen Hunter at Rotary Club of Georgetown Garage Sale May Call for pickup of Items that you want to donate for a worthy cause Georgetown District Memorial Hospital Auxiliary is holding a Country and Western Dance at Holy Cross Auditorium Sat May 9pm to 1 a per person includes lunch Call Bev or at Milton and District Horticultural Society holds Its popular plant auction Monday May in Pint Street Union Hall behind the Public Library Sale starts at 30 Meetings Attention lawn bowlers Annual Spring Meeting May at In club house Please try to at tend Georgetown Figure Skating Club annual general meeting at Joseph Gibbons School pm Friday May3 Credit Valley Artisans general meeting at Col Wednesday may at Crime prevention seminars for all Hills businesses at 11 Div community room St Thursday May and Wed May at Contact PC Laurel Burnett or Dave at est to reserve a Holy Cross annual general meeting May 15 at Ho ly Cross School gym Speaker Shirley educator at the Parent Child Center For Info or tickets call 8730123 or Adoption Disclosure Information Forum May 9 00 pm at Public Library Dixie and Mlsslssauga No charge For info call the Children a Aid Society at 4184561352 Open Door Teen DropIn Centre and The Young Parents Pro gram general annual meeting Sal May at am at St George Anglican Church For more Info call Ann at or Cindy at Hills United Way Annual General Meeting Wednesday May 15 SOD at Acton District High School 21 Cedar Refreshments Everyone welcome volunteer appreciation Wed May B at St Albans Church Hall Willow St Acton Wine and cheese at All welcome Rotary Club of Georgetown meets Mondays at pm at the Chateau Restaurant For more info call Ian Walker at 8779181 Acton Lions Club meet the 2nd and 4th Wednesday of the month at 8 at Legion Branch Acton For information contact Dave at Lioness Club of Georgetown meet at the members homes on the 1st and 3rd Wednesday of the month For Info contact Louise Glff In at Meetings of the Region of Peel Support Group held the 1st Tuesday of each month and offer post sup port and discuss birth options Call 8289467 or I Parents in Need of Sup port meet at Trinity United Church Mill St Acton 3rd Thursday of every month For more Info call Club of Georgetown meets Wednesdays at the Halton Golf and Country Club for a noon luncheon For Info contact John Schatjo 877 Hills meet Mondays 7 pm Glen Williams Town Hall For Info call Don at or Paul at Kinsmen Club of Georgetown meet every other at the Hotel at p For more Info call Ron at Lions Club of Georgetown meets every Tuesday at the Lion Hall Mill St behind the arena at 7 p m For info con lactBill Mason The Rotary Club of Acton meets Thursdays at pm at the Wooden Hearth Restaurant For more info call Brian Robertson at 8531653 Georgetown Branch 120 Royal Canadian Legion monthly meeting 4lh Thursday of each month at the Georgetown Legion Branch Mill St Georgetown For more Info call Optimist Club of Georgetown meets 2nd and Tuesday of the month at 7 pm at the club For more contact Sandy Booth at Living With Cancer Group meets every second Thursday at the Canadian Cancer Society Milton Branch Main St at 7 For more info call or 8781878 La League of Georgetown and Ac Ion meet the 2nd Mon day of each month at to talk about breast feeding and parenting Preg moms and nursing babies welcome For more in call Sandra at Volunteers Volunteer training session to celebrate Mental Health Week Open to everyone Mon days at p m May 13 June 3 at 341 Kerr St OakvtUe Call for more Info Multiple Sclerosis Society of Ac ton and Georgetown needs volunteers to sell carnations for on Sat May In Acton and Georgetown If In terested call Jane at or Doris at Georgetown Vintners are looking for amateur For Info call B77 Red Cross Georgetown and District requires volunteers to assist In Finance and Pub id driving and First Aid In For more info call Bernlce 8775233 Alcoholics Anonymous can help Coll for more in formation Canadian Mental Health Associa lion Region Branch needs volunteers for recrea Hon programs on Tues Wed and evenings Burl Ington Oak He and Acton For more Info call Laura Mc- at 8455044 The Salvation Army will pick up appliances In working order For more Information call GRAND RE OPENING NEW LOCATION MYGENEDYITON 61 MAM ST S 8732851 DOWNTOWN GEORGETOWN OUTSTANDING SELECTION OF TOP QUALITY BRAND NAME FURNISHINGS AT WHOLESALE PRICES Ontario Chesterfield Wholesalers Behind Guelph Auto Moll Guelph BRING THIS COUPON BUY 1 DOZEN DONUTS GET DOZEN FREE j DONUTS 118 Guelph St Normandy PI j Guelph St Krtolcrest Ore J COUNTRYSIDE BUTCHERING Custom Killing Cutting and Wrapping Government Inspected 4168771194 Hours Moo Wad RR2 Oil Thura Fd Behind ATs Custom noon Trafalgar