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the HERALD WednaiUy July 17 latl Community News Plgell Victims of child abuse never forget the trauma stays with them forever This is one In a series of articles which will Inform readers on issues surrounding violence against women and children Family violence whether physical sexual verbal psychological or economic even tually affects every member of the family Whether it Is direct or indirect the result is the same Victims must have community help not only for support when they recognize their need but also to help them Identify the abuse to which they are being subjected By PALMER Herald Special This past week in the Tuesday edition of the Toronto Sun there were two headlines which peaked my interest The first one read Molested girl man 20 gets 1 days in jail This account told of a man whod sexually assaulted a 14yearold last January and received two years probation and must undergo psychiatric treat ment The headline directly above it was Judge Rips Church Sex Choirmaster and told of a man whod victimized a 14yearold girl 20 years ago He received six months probation and must do community service work In reference to the latter Justice Patricia German said in part that the abuser had taken advantage of her youth and in nocence and that Shes had to pay the penalty of that over the years and has had a great deal of stress and This woman is now in her 30s and still pays the price for the events which occurred during her life over 20 years ago Those two 14yearolds were molested by men Those men they will never be able to forget those men they may never be able to truly forgive Both these womens lives have been altered at a very early age and at a time when they should have been hav ing fun with kids their own age Instead they had their sexuality stolen from them and their lives unmercifully torn apart My heart goes out to both of these women Sexual abuse is devastating and the decision handed down by Mme Justice Patrica German accurately reflects her concern for the in dignity the victim continues to endure She has recognized that the trauma of 20 years ago is con tinuing to have an affect on the functioning of this woman today We can only wonder how the other young girl so recently traumatized will fare in the long- term Yet wc must recognize that for every charge going before the courts there are many that never make it to the police much less the court system Many women want their personal tragedies hidden in their own homes Young girls whove been assaulted may never receive ap propriate counselling Sexual assault is most often inflicted by a father stepfather or a friend of the finally Parents may not be able to handle the sexual assault and may blame themselves for not being there for their daughter or may deny the occurrence of the assault All of this can mean a young girls scars will not have an opportunity to heal And what of these abusive men Will they recognize they made an error in judgement and committed a crime Will they recognize their deviant behavior for what it is Will they accept the help theyve received Will they realize the devastation theyve meted out on the women theyve violated A man who recognizes and ac cepts his responsibility in an assault can obtain help and suc cessfully be rehabilitated Un fortunately all to often he does not He sees the woman as invok ing his behavior as in asking for it He is wrong A woman does not want deserve or ask to be assaulted She gains no satisfaction from being assaulted Our society has chang ed in the past years Now we recognize all forms of abuse and the impact on victims Policing has improved Victims com plaints are taken more seriously and acted upon The court system is slowly changing Male abusers should be con victed They should be required to obtain counselling They should be monitored for the long- term to ensure appropriate changes in behavior occurs In the situations documented above the court system has helped these women through convictions but we as members of the larger community must continue to sup port these women so they may in tegrate back into society as men tally healthy human beings When we see a woman or child in a potentially abusive situation we must Intervene to ensure the victim is all right We can do that by calling the police by calling an appropriate agency such as the Childrens Aid Society or by being a good friend and neighbor and opening our home in friend- ship to victims Does your pool look lite a pond If your pool is murky green or has black or yellow spots you probably have an algae problem And algae is not only ugh its not good tor you or your pool It clogs your filter and makes a hearty meal for all kinds of bacteria BioGuard has a cure Because were algae experts No matter what type algae you have we have the solution So dont swim in a pondbring your pool to BioGuard We make swimming a heavenly experience j Bring your pool to BioGuard ACADIAN POOLS 1 34 Guelph Street GEORGETOWN 8733320 8779562 WIN A PRINT NAME THE ORIGIN AL Come visit us at the gallery and out your ballot during our regular Friday and Saturday business hour All entries by July 31st The winner win be announced on our marquee ALMARAH STUDIO LTD Guelph St GEORGETOWN 8734229