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the HERALD Page 12B Community Wednesday September 18 Abusive male requires help for his behavior By PALMER Herald Special A few days ago I overheard a conversation in which some young adults were discussing assaults A young man com mented that when police are call ed to intervene in an assault inci dent they ought to cart both par ties off to jail He went on to say that assaults are results of arguments because each person pushes the buttons of the other person That is wrong A man beats up his victim because he wants to control her He needs to dominate her and if his attempts at psychological control dont work well enough he resorts to violent acts Most assaults are not preceded by verbal arguments The abusive male requires help for the uncontrollable rage that demonstrated his hostile per sonality If you know or suspect one of your neighbors is being abused you have a legal respon sibility to report your suspicions to police Just as important a responsive neighbor should help he abusive male to obtain help A recent Arnold arti cle in The Toronto Star discussed the hostile personality It stated that hostility lowers life expec tancy and has definite moral emotional and behavioral com ponents Although anger may be a normal reaction to some cir cumstances the anger expressed by the hostile personality is in dicative 0 the cynicism suspiciousness and contempt which pervades much of that per sons life Psychologists studies have shown that hostile behavior is linked to heart disease Probably a corollary compounding the pro blem is the fact that hostile per sons have fewer friends and therefore a greatly diminished support system Whether this is because the hostile personality is mistrustful of others or people dont wish to be around a hostile person is another matter Studies also show that hostile people dont learn to adapt and effectively solve their problems This often leads to more conflict in the lives of those around them HELP US HELP OURSELVES The male abuser is a danger to his own physical wellbeing as well as his own mental health The abusive male by not receiving the help he needs is shortening his own life Wife bat tering is an epidemic in our socie ty and until we all take some reponsibility in recognizing and ensuring abusers get proper counselling it will continue to manifest itself across the cultural and economic fabric of our na tion The discussion I referred to at the beginning of this article is in dicative of public misinformation and misguided perceptions Alt too often the public en courage abusers by reinforcing the perception that the victim deserves the abuse or did something to cause the abusive incident Some counsellors over a period of time and through lack of appropriate training in dealing with abusive mates may actually reinforce the abusive behavior by placing some blame on the vic tim A counsellor may also ter minate therapy prematurely These actions may ensure physical violence continues with at least a diminished intensity Psychological warfare may in deed increase Victims may feel comfortable and optmistic because their partners are receiving counselling and may be expecting a miracle This cna leave their physical health at risk GEORGETOWN JAPAN KARATE ASSOCIATION IS OPENING IN GEORGETOWN Call 8770771 PUBLIC INFORMATION CENTRE STEELES AVENUE RECONSTRUCTION FROM SIXTH LINE SOUTH TO TRAFALGAR ROAD TOWN OF HALTON HILLS REVIEW OF THE PRELIMINARY DESIGN A Public Centre will be hold DATE Thursdoy September 1991 TIME pm PLACE Hornby Community Centre Ave West of Trafalgar Road Town of Halton Hills This Information Centre is being held to provide the public with the oppor tunity to review the preliminary design drawings for the proposed recon struction of Ave from east of the Line South to west of Trafalgar Rood Interested persons are Invited to drop in time during the above hours to view and comment on the proposed works staff and the Consultant will be available to answer your questions For further Information regarding this presentation please contact Ms K Btom P Public Works Department Regionat Municipality of Halton at the following telephone numbers extension 7612 From Burlington Milton and From Georgetown From Acton From Aldorshot Joan A EagTesham Regional Clerk to an abuser who has not received the right kind of treatment Better counselling with more stringent long term followup is necessary to ensure abusive males have altered their behavior At the same time bet ter public education surrounding issues of abuse must ensure that stereotypical viewpoints on why abuse occurs are shattered Feci free to contact Jade by directing letters to her attention at The Herald All cor respondence will remain con fidential Should you wish to speak to call the Distress Centre at and your call will be returned If you ore a woman or child In crisis or an abusive male wanting help call the Distress Centre or dial BE READY FOR THE NEW SHOWS WITH SAMSUNG eg SAMSUNG 28 Diagonal Stereo Color TV 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