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6- The Oakville Beaver Weekend, Saturday July 12, 2008 www.oakvillebeaver.com The Oakville Beaver 467 Speers Rd., Oakville Ont. L6K 3S4 (905) 845-3824 Fax: 337-5567 Classified Advertising: 905-632-4440 Circulation: 845-9742 The Oakville Beaver is a member of the Ontario Press Council. The council is located at 80 Gould St., Suite 206, Toronto, Ont., M5B 2M7. Phone (416) 340-1981. Advertising is accepted on the condition that, in the event of a typographical error, that portion of advertising space occupied by the erroneous item, together with a reasonable allowance for signature, will not be charged for, but the balance of the advertisement will be paid for at the applicable rate. The publisher reserves the right to categorize advertisements or decline. Editorial and advertising content of the Oakville Beaver is protected by copyright. Unauthorized use is prohibited. Commentary Guest Columnist NEIL OLIVER Vice President and Group Publisher DAVID HARVEY General Manager JILL DAVIS Editor in Chief ROD JERRED Managing Editor DANIEL BAIRD Advertising Director RIZIERO VERTOLLI Photography Director SANDY PARE Business Manager Metroland Media Group Ltd. includes: Ajax/Pickering News Advertiser, Alliston Herald/Courier, Arthur Enterprise News, Barrie Advance, Caledon Enterprise, Brampton Guardian, Burlington Post, Burlington Shopping News, City Parent, Collingwood/Wasaga Connection, East York Mirror, Erin Advocate/Country Routes, Etobicoke Guardian, Flamborough Review, Georgetown Independent/Acton Free Press, Harriston Review, Huronia Business Times, Lindsay This Week, Markham Economist & Sun, Midland/Penetanguishine Mirror, Milton MARK DILLS Director of Production MANUEL GARCIA Production Manager CHARLENE HALL Director of Distribution ALEXANDRIA ANCHOR Circ. Manager WEBSITE oakvillebeaver.com The Oakville Beaver is a division of Lesson learned the hard way Oakville Beaver Managing Editor Some people sure do have a lot of time on their hands. The Wednesday edition of The Oakville Beaver introRod Jerred duced a new feature in the paper -- an internet poll. As a weekly feature, the Oakville Beaver would publish a poll and readers could then visit our internet site oakvillebeaver.com to vote. Our first poll question was "Did the Halton District School Board make the right choice in deciding to build a new school in the Clearview community and close four schools in southeast Oakville?" Selecting a question for an internet poll is difficult. If the question is too innocuous, few people will vote. And if the answer to the poll will be too onesided, it's irrelevant. We thought this was a good first question because the school closure issue had been in the news for the past few months and there was a lot of interest in this subject. Unfortunately, there was a glitch in our polling system. A big glitch. Turned out that users with a certain browser could vote more than once. And they did. By the end of the day the poll had recorded more than 40,000 votes. The poll was obviously being abused by people submitting multiple votes. When we realized something was amiss, our web technicians went to work first isolating the problem and then trying to fix it. However, in order to do this, the poll had to remain open. They have since solved the problem and believe it to be as secure as possible. Overnight Thursday, they removed the results from the previously flawed poll and started a new poll with the same question. However, we have since pulled the poll entirely. At this point, we felt it was a trust issue. Since the first poll was obviously flawed, we felt many people still wouldn't believe the results of the second poll, even if the results were 100 per cent accurate. A new poll with a different question will be posted on Wednesday. Our internet technicians assure us they have solved the problem. Internet polls are not scientific tools. They are intended to be for entertainment purposes while generating interest in topical matters of the day. There was no ulterior motive behind the poll, as some callers suggested. No one put us up to posing the question, as others suggested. Our intent was simply to publish the results from the first poll underneath the new poll question on Wednesday. Next Wednesday, we will try to introduce a question that will still be of interest to our readers, yet not one which should encourage multiple votes. As with all new tools there is a learning curve. Unfortunately, based upon the phone calls and e-mails we received Thursday, our first lesson caused a lot of grief for many of our readers. For this we apologize. IAN OLIVER President Media Group Ltd. Canadian Champion, Milton Shopping News, Mississauga Business Times, Mississauga News, Napanee Guide, Newmarket/Aurora EraBanner, Northumberland News, North York Mirror, Oakville Beaver, Oakville Shopping News, Oldtimers Hockey News, Orillia Today, Oshawa/Whitby/Clarington Port Perry This Week, Owen Sound Tribune, Palmerston Observer, Peterborough This Week, Picton County Guide, Richmond Hill/Thornhill/Vaughan Liberal, Scarborough Mirror, Stouffville/Uxbridge Tribune, Forever Young, City of York Guardian RECOGNIZED FOR EXCELLENCE BY: Ontario Community Newspapers Association Canadian Community Newspapers Association Suburban Newspapers of America THE OAKVILLE BEAVER IS PROUD OFFICIAL MEDIA SPONSOR FOR: United Way of Oakville TV AUCTION When you really should be running through the sprinkler You would think that two people as young and groovy, as hip and happening as my wife and I, upon suddenly finding ourselves with a (mostly) empty nest, would be going wild. Bonkers. Completely crazy -- you know, wearing sandals without socks, running through the sprinkler in our underpants, lighting sparklers in the back yard, imbibing appletinies with abandon, missing breakfast (the most important meal of the day) altogether and eating dinner with our fingers (and with our elbows on the table), snacking on soda crackers in bed, that sort of thing. But you'd be wrong. And I'll tell you why. Well, first I'd best explain how we have miraculously come to find ourselves with a (mostly) empty nest. Our two sons, you see, are at the ages (22 and 18) where they are rarely at home, save to refuel on our food, or borrow our cars, or get their insatiable laundry needs satisfied, or to just hit us up for some spare cash. Further, we recently found ourselves careening across our fair province, delivering our 12-year-old daughter to a 10-day summer camp just a mile or two north of Nowhere on Lake Whatever It's Called. Upon returning from this epic road trip and finding our usually overcrowded abode suddenly anomalously empty, you would expect the hijinks and shenanigans and tomfoolery to thusly begin in earnest. But you'd be wrong. Upon returning from delivering our daughter, my wife and I crawled off for a little nap. But not before my wife wondered aloud: "Is there anything worse than coming down with a summer cold?" "How about getting caught in the gears of a combine?" I replied. Andy Juniper While I'm sure her question was rhetorical, in my feeble, feverish state I could not help but respond. "Or, itching powder in your underwear? Or, how about someone slipping laxatives in your brownies?" Yes, friends, my wife and I are ill. Sick. Devoid of decent health. But it's summer, we whine: don't we deserve to be healthy all summer long after being sick all winter (and autumn and spring)? Apparently not. Because just before school ended our darling daughter came home with a bug that incubated, hatched and, around our house, came to be known as The Mother Of All Colds. Our daughter missed a few days during the final week of school as this bug bowled her over. Turned out the bug was not only beastly, it was also unrelenting (lasting forever, if not longer), oh, and as contagious as cooties. Darling daughter generously passed it on to her mother. Who then charitably passed it on to me. For 14 days now the whole house has been one big sneeze and wheeze and one horrendous hack attack. To boot, for the last few days I've been living under the cloud of a threat. It's true: my wife has threatened to murder me. Not in my sleep, mind you (because with this insidious influenza that grips at your throat and makes you cough, sleep is unheard of), but murder me in my bed nonetheless. Why? Well she claims that in my current sick state I keep her up all night by, ah, unwittingly honking. Like a goose. Naturally, I deny the charges. Naturally, she threatens to record my alleged nocturnal noises and then murder me ­ insisting that once a judge hears my horrible honking she'll be exonerated with a ruling of justifiable homicide! Honestly, the whole thing is out of control. Kind of like this cold. And all this at a time when, by rights, I should be running through the sprinkler in my underpants. Andy Juniper can be visited at his Web site, www.strangledeggs.com, or contacted at ajuniper@strangledeggs.com