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1 i •> << : ^\ ^- ^ I Sam Stackpole's | Adventure i "You never heard tell of my mer- lasses caudy a/lventure, did you Sam?" said Slackpole to me one day, when I called at his house to take the census of his family. I shook my head and he proceed- -ed: "I speculate it was raythur a won- derful afliair, and if Sally there VJould toll it, you would appreciate it, certain. I was courting Sally at the time and was in love up to my eyes. But her old daddy was opposed to me out and out. And he was a stupendous man â€" the â- crossost, ugliest old man that ever wore spectacles; sind I'vo often won- <lered how Sally could bo such a â- charming: little creature, with such a crusty old fellow for a fatlier. She was a bonuni mag^utn gal, sure, at that time; a little faded now, you see; but that is to be expected. Beauty is but knee deep, but ugli- ness goes to the bone. Well, one day I went to town and bought a whole heap of fancy do- ings, ribbons, bea,ds, goose-grease foi the hair, etcetre and so forth. I was determined to coax her up; and putting my purchases anugly in a bundle, I locomioted towards her daddy's house, true as a rifle. It was rather late when I arriv', and old Scraggs was bilin' some merlasses candy for Sally to peddle next day â€" there being a show â€" Sally arfd her mother having re- tired. The first thing I done, however, arter enterin, and old Scraggs had stared at mo a few, was to set right down in a pot of hot merlasscs he'd put on a cheer to cool, which, made mo jump and howl amaisin'. Ginger bread! how it burnt! but as he didn't see the accident. I squatted on Sally's bandbo.x which contain- ed her Sunday bonnet â€" not notic- ingâ€"and went to rubbing like sixty- six. Well, arter I'n sot there a spell, groaning for myself, and wondering haw ntuch damage I had done, the olii man gave me another such ter- rific If ok, and said: "Si«n Stackpole, what have you come here after, say?" "Mr. Scraggs." says I. not daring to stir for fear he would discover my predicament. "I have come to you on very important business. (Oh, how that morlasses smarted! ! And if you'll just keep your ebene- zer dovm about five minutes, I will endeavor to inform you with that degree of accuracy that I'm so pre- iminently amd conepicuQusly develop- ed." "The old fellow didn't understand that ar powerful language, and in course he did not say nothin. "Perhaps," says I. "you've notic- ed that I have been paying numer- ous attention to your daughter, and am gratified to state with infinite poplarity. Now ef you will give Sally to me, I «-ill vote for you for reeve, and leave my country if you ain't elected." Well, arter I'd delivered myself in that are benevolent style, what do you think that codger's reply was? VVhy, instead of saying, "Take Sal- ly, and welcome," ho actually point- ed to the door, and toM me to scat- ter. I vow, I got out of patience, then, sure, and didn't care wihat oc- curred!â€" if Sally's bonnet was smash- ed. "IMt. Scraggs," scz I, "I should be very happy to oblige you. but the fact is. I sat right down here, and can't leave nohow, unless you cut a hole in my trousers." When the old man seed how I was stuck fast as I sot. he just catched up the whole pot of hot candy off the fire and enyjtied it all over ra^y ^ead and shoulders, true as I'm alive, Jehu! how the stufi made me Cavort and holler! But I was so nad that I grabbled a great bog md let him have it, biff! rTght be- Iween the eyes. "There, tako that," sez I, "you old flap-eared piece of deformity," Uid then I started for the door, di- rect. I just got it open, ready to dart, when old Mrs. Scraggs burst Into a loud laugh, and Sally spoke lor the first time. "Sam Stackpole," sez she, "hold! My bandbox and your pantaloons are annexed." " Jomsalcm," sez I, and I leaped. I must have been awful skeered, for I landed at least twenty feet out- side the hou.se and run like a prairie fire. I never looked behind me un- til next mornin,' and when I did the kiver of the band box was stick- en fast to my trousers. That was my mcrlaswes candj' cd- venturc, Squire, and right hot work it was. But I married Sally at Itist. The old man gin in arter a while, and now you can reckon up the family in your siacus as soon aa you please. GENEROUS FOES. ' BUNCH OF ArHORISMS. Charity uncovers a multitude of Mn»ers. _ Some men impress us as being too good to be true. A frieze on the wall is worth two colds in the head. A man of mettle must bo one who has plenty of brass. â- W'lhen aerial navigation comes we'll bo all u[> in the air about it. T'he longp^ you keep a secrtft the less iniporj^aut it seenie to toll it. •'Now 1 realize that richai tako unto thi-ni.solves wings," mji.siji the najrio-l man as' he noticed the pluui- ICe on his wife's hat. Story of Mrs. Delarey and XiCi'd Methuen. The wife of the gallant Boer sol- dier, General 15elaroy, unlike some of her compatriots, is a woman first and a partisan afterward. llor gentleness and good humor appear most agreeably in a story of a par- ticular foe. Lord Methuen, which she tells in the simple narrative of her trials and wanderings during tliu Anglo-Boer war. Mrs. Delarey met Lord Methuen twice, the first time after he entered Lichtenberg, when her horses had been commandeered, and she went in person to protest to 'the general. "What can I do for you ?" he asked. "For me you cannot do much," she replied, "for as far as my cattle are concerned I have lost nearly every- thing. I have still two horses left, and one of these belonged to my son, .vho is dead, and I hope you will not tako it away from me." General Methuen put out his hand and the Door woman took it. ""Vfour son's horse shall not be taken from you," he said. The next time Mrs. Delarey saw Lord Methuen was wht'n ho was lying wounded and a prisoner in Dolarey's laager. "I went into his tent," she says. "There lay the great. strong man. wounded above the knee, right through the bone, and I pitied him." When Mrs. Delarey had come in. Lord Methuen begged her to forgive him for all the annoyance he had caused her. and ho asked her it she had sulTered much discomfort from "all that running away." ' "No." she replied, "it all wont much bettor than I had expected. I did not have to do my beat to es- cape from falling into your hands !' "Oh," said he, "I have done my -best to catch you !" And so they "chaffed" each other But it was a diflicult position for both, so Mrs. Delarey asked him if his leg was hurting him much. "No, not very much," said he. "It won't be a good thing for us," said she, "if your log gets cured so quickly. Then you will come and shoot us again !" Lord Methuen laughed. "No," said ho, "I am going away. I shall not shoot at you any more." "I had a fat chicken killed," says Mrs. Delarey, "and I took some biscuits and sent thorn with the chicken to tho wounded lord. People kept asking how it was possible that I could bo kind to such a man "T said that .so far I had never learned to hate any one, and that therefore I could still do good to my adversary ; as when God gave me grace and strength to prove to my enemy that in spite of all the de- solation and destruction ho had wjought, there still remained some- thing over for me." â€" f KING SETS STYLE IN PARIS, His Visit to Longchamps Revela- tion to Frenchmen. The King of England has invaded Paris and sot the style for the arbi tor of style for all the world. It wa.s carrying coals to Newcastle with a vengeance, but the men of Paris seemed to like it. During his visit to Paris King Ed- ward went to many places, but at none of them was it so easy to study him as at the races at Long- chaiups. There ho walked about whore all could see and observe. This is the impression he made up- on one who saw him: "A better dressed man I never saw. One might have taken him for a smartly dressed member of the Jockey club, as well as for the King of Eng- land. I have seen the Czar, the German Kinpcror, the Kings of Bel- gium and Sweden, and many other royal personages w''h the reputa- tion for good dressing, but never any one with the 'chic,' as the French say, ,of the former Prince of Wales; and, ' while His Majesty is portly, he actually looked jaunty at Longchamps, with his well turned up silk hat. tilted just a suspicion over his right eye. a more nothing, but just enough to give him a de- bonair look, just tho thing at the races. "All the members of the Jockey club quickly imitated the tilt, and a fashion in wearing a silk hat has been set. Tho King's overcoat was a marvel of tailor' skill, a dark mixed cloth with a velvet collar and jaunty vel- vet cuiTs. rolling back from the wrists and slit up in Louis -XUI. fa.shion. The form was the now sack niodol, and all overcoats now shown have velvet cults, shaped like Hiis Majesty's, exceedingly dressy in effect. "His tie was another revelation of dark blue faille, with a tiny tur- quoifso blue enamel pin stuck through it and contrasted strongly in ele- gance with good President Loubet's stiff black cravat, and they tell mo there has been a positive boom in blue tics and enamel pins. "As for His Majesty's gloves, they have been widely copied. 'ITiey were of yellow glace kid, with heavy black silk stitching ornamenting the backs, and whole glove factories have remained open all night adding black stitching to .vellow gloves. "Another fad tho King has start- ed, or, rather, revived, is tho carry- ing of- a gold headed cane, which was conspicuous at tho races, the only occasion when tris Majesty appeared OS ail ortllnary man, desirous to make a good invliression by his smart clothes." ]RIT1SH ROYAL CHILDREN TH3 GRANDCHILDREN OF KING EDWARD. They Are Charming, Unaissuming Cbildliko Youngsteia â€" Are FiiU of Fun. Being a royal child "isn't all it's cracked up to bo." In fairy stories, the prince has everything his own way. He can commandeer all tho plum jam he wants just ou the strength of his being prince. In real life, it is slightly different. The children of the house roj'ul of Englandâ€" the first children of the world, so far as rank and estato go â€"are very ordinary folk. It is a very polite fiction to assume they have everything their own way, writes a London correspondent. At the outset, lot one thing be made plain : The children of the pre- sent Prince of Wales, grandchildren of King Edward, are charming, im- assuming, childlike youngsters, who put on as little "side" in connection with their manner of living as it is possible to imagine. They have no more uso for ceremoEV and geegaws than Tom Sawyer bad for a tuxedo. One of the causes Of King Ed- ward's widespread popularity in England is his great allection for his grandchildren. It is a phase of his character which every one admires, and which makes him lovable in tho eyes of tho people. He is always making his grandchildren happy in some delightfully unexpected way. Not long ago, he presented Prince Edward with one of tho finest of bicycles, and the boy almost forgot, for the nonce, to ride his many lino ponies. The first day Prince Edward went cycling, he nearly rode himself to death, .and had to be reprimanded for his imprudence. KEPT AWAY FROM SCHOOL. Up to this time the royal children have had very little schooling, as the principle of modern education re- quires that children should be first assured perfect physical health bo- fore the brain is developed. Play, pure and simple, has filled up the lives of those little royalties; and they have got playing down pretty fine. Every visitor to Sand- ringham, Portsmouth and London who is the least acquainted with the royal children knows that they are full of fun, and tlieir capacity for being entertaim-d is remarkable. Tho only education received so tar by the younger children â€" Princess Mary, Prince Albert and Prince Henry of Wales â€" is of the kindergar- ten kind. At each royal palace visit- ed by the children there is a nursery fitted up with instructive elementary maps and designs. Toys used bjf the royal children are of the "useful" variety. Of course, Prince Edward â€" who will be 10 years did on June 23 nextâ€" has already begun his education proper. He was taught his alphabet by old Admiral Keppol, an intimate personal friend of tho King, who has been for many years the "guide, philosopher and friend" of the royal children. In fact, he taught all tho royal children how to walk. PRINCE EDWARD THE STAR. The children now principally in the public eye arc. of course, those of tho Prince and Princess of Wales. They are known as the royal child- ren proper ; although tho children of the present Duchess of Fife â€" the King's eldest daughter- are popular- ly considered members of the royal famil.y. The Duke and Duchess of Fife have entirely of recent years abrogated tho title of royalty, beir.g content with tho rank of Peers, llioir child- ren, Ladies Alexandra and Maud Dull are not addressed as "Your Royal Highnesses." One would think that the King's own daughter would of all people, be entitled lo all the circumstance and pomp of ro.yalty ; but such is not the case, owing to a private arrangement between the royal family themselves. The child- ren of the Duchoss of Fife are class- ed merely as tho children of peers or lords. Nevertheless, any account of royal children in which those of tho Duke and Duchoss of Fife were omitted would bo peculiarly incomplete. Ladies Alexandra and Maud DulT are among tho most popular of "Little Royalties," and those is never a palace juv.jnilo function in which thoy do not participate, and, fre- qui>ntly, carry off the honors. Though little Prince Edward, son of the Prince of Wales, has attract- ed most public attention so far, tho other children of the Prince of Wales are extremely interesting. Princess Mary â€" or, to give her her full title. Princess Victoria Alexan- dra Alice Mary â€" was 7 years old April 25. and a more lively, mis- chievious little bu.sybody it is im- po.-isiblo to find anywhere. She has always been a groat companion of her brothers, and her very quick wit and clever head for games have made her a popular favorite among all the children of her "sot." ALL CHILDREN DRILL. Last .vear tho ro.val children took a very great interest in military exorcises, and not tho least interest- ed was Princess Mary, despite the fact that her brothers gravely in- formed hor that "women didn't go soldiering properl.v." Who knows nl' the drill rrgulations, and, on" fim afternoons, puts hor In others through true military discipline, to | the delight of visitors to tho palace grounds. Usually the drills are conducted under tlu" supervision of some otJicer who knows .something of child-lifo ; but, not infro(iuently, tho services of some man servant about tho palace are required. The royal ihildn.-n are strictly forbidden to take any sor- vaiit away from his or her regular duty lo "play" ; but those are not tho kind of children to fail to find plenty of help in tl\eir games. The expressioo "Your Royal High- ness" is not used in addressing any of the children of royalty. They are merely spoken to as "Prince," with the given name. They have been taught to bo considerate and kindly to those around them, and never to use any expressions or adopt any mannerisms inconsistent with tho uses of polite society. Thoy know the moaning of the word "please" better than most other children, al- though their rank and title would permit them to "dispense with such formality. Probably the favorite of tho royal children at present is little Prince Henry. He is very "cute," and his sayings and doings afford no end of amusement, to tho royal circle. Tho baby born to tho Prince of Wales a few months ago is. of course, much talked of ; but, as yet, is not known to the public. Prince Edward, now considered a "big boy," is very fond of tho so. cioty of his grandparents, ilio King and Queen, lie travels much with them, and when "on tour" takes the keenest interest in all his sur- roundings. He makes Queen Alex- andra take him all ovor the ship when he is at sea anywhere, and, with the ordinary boy's lovo for machinery insists on inspecting tlio "engines" of all boats on which thoy chance to be. When he iS in the carriage driving with the King, Prince Edward al- ways gravely returns the salutes of the multitude ; doubtless imagining that he, too, is sharing in tho de- monstration. Not long ago he was attending a function at Birmingham at which he was retjuired to jjlant a tree. In- advertently, ho placed some of tho loo.se earth that should have gone around tho roots of the tree upon tho shoes of the mayor of Birming- ham. Looking up, with a quick smile, he said to tho King : "Look, I'vo planted tho mayor." E\erybody laughed heartily, and tho King told tho .story wherever ho went. FIGHT LIKE OTHER BOYS. Prince Edward is a fine horseback rider ; and most of his time is spent out of doors. He enjoys. ei;icket, ton- nis and football â€" on a miniature scale â€" and is one of the healthiest childi'on imaginable. Prince Albert of Wales, one year younger than Prince Edward. is somewhat jealous of the older child; though this jealousy is never in a moan spirit. The two princes have had one or two pretty hard "sot-to" fights, concerning which tho King has been rather inclined to let thorn settle their own difficulties. Not loiiff ago, thei'o was a rough-and-tumblo "scrap " between tho two princes in the stable yard of SandWngham. Queen Alexandra was for separat- ing them at once and punishing both ; but tho King insisted on their being loft alone. Half an hour after- wards, both princes wore the best of friend.s â€" far Ix'tter companions than tiiey would have boon had thoy boon permitted to cherish their resentful feelings under punishment in separ- ate rooms of tho palace. Tho place in England where tb" little princes like most to be is Sandringham palace. This is the country homo of royalty. Here tho children have a great number of pets to tako care ofâ€" birds and animals â€" and each child old enough to know un.ything about agriculture is given a little patch of ground whereon are planted various flowers. MUST BE CONSIDERED. Altogether tho little princes have a OOLLIN&WOOD 1^' WITH THE mi rvEBJASKABLE CURE OF A CITI ZEN BY DODD'S KIDNEY PILLS. Valentine Fisher's Terrible Sci«« tic Pains Speedily Vanished Be- fore the Great Kidney Remedy. Collingwood, May 25.â€" (Special)â€" Every city. town and village iD Canada is reporting remarkable !urcs by Dodd's Kidney Pills and Collingwood is not behind tho rest, There are scores of people here wh« have used tho great Kidney Remedj and who are not slow to tell of tij« splendid results. Valentine Fis|jjjr, well known in the town and sur rounding country, is one of thom. "I was troubled with Kidney. Dis- •luso for thirteen years," Mr. Fishei jays in telling of his euro. "It do- I'oloped into Sciatica which located In my side so that I could not walh without a cane. 1 had to use hyp- )dormic injections of niorphrine to sase the pain. "I tried diirerent medical men an< nediciues with no good results till 1 .va.i persuaded to try Dodd's Kid- ley Pills. Three boxes effected t jerfect cure. I can recommend Dodd's Kidney Pills to all who an iufltering from Rheumatism or an] â- >thor form of Kidney Disease." very enjoyable, childlike, simple sor of time. They have, of course, per sonal servants ; but these servant do only such thing's for tho childre' ^ as the little ones aro incapable c doing themselves. I The royal children aro brought ui with the idea of shifting more o le^s for themselves. Prince Edwari always dresses himself in tho morn ings, and goes to bed by himself a night ; while Prince Albi;rt i equally proficient in tho manl.y ar of self help. Possibly, Princess Mar gets the largest share of personal at tention ; but even she is kindly an considerate to those around her. an only oversteps the bounds of prin cessship when she is playing som prank on hor comi)anions. The royal "kids" â€" to uso an o> pressive term which seems to (it th case â€" arc very much like otho. youngsters. Both Prince Edwar and Prince Albert aro pretty gooi in a "scrap," and if any one trio to impose on them simply becaus ho thinks thoy aro "not up b much," said adversary usually find his hands full. Taking everything -into considora tion, tho children of English royalt; are to be congratulated. Thc.v ar not spoiled or pampored. Thoy ar true "out-and-out" children, in ev ery sense of tho world. And thcf know what "fun" is with a bi| "F." FACTS .A.BOUT LONDON. A child is bom every three mia utes and a death is registered ever five minutes. Daily a million pei sons travel on the underground rail ways. 7.000 hansoms, 14,000 caba and 7,000 tram cars. Four thou ' sand postmen deliver 10,000,00* letters weekly, walking a distanq equal to twice tho circumferenco o the globe. Si.^y thousand letten aro written a day, consuming thirtj gallons of ink. Ten thousand mile of overhead telegraph wires almosi shut out tho smoky canopy whicl spreads above the same Londoi streets, and the number of tele graph messages received in Londoi/ last year was over 6.000.000. Ninety million gallons of water an consumed daily. -•^.:, WORTH IT. Mrs. H. â€" "Mrs. Catterson drossoj e-xtromoly well. df>e!?ii't s,he?" Mr. H'. â€" "Yes; but she keeps h'usband worried to death all time." Mrs. H. (admiringly) â€" "Well worth it I" hoi till it's Jim Dumps' young wife while yet a bride Soma biscuits made with greatest pride. Jim looked with fear upon the food, But to a bride one can't be rude. "Let's eat ' Force ' first, dear, 'tis my whim," "^ It saved the life of " Suaay Jim." Force ^^ The n«»dy-to-B«T« CerMi when in doubt, eat it ^9 An "Sttixny J^tm" Kow. "In our household 'S»rce'.U.ft«.-*i- miUsr and welcome as ' Sunny Jim," and Ibat'a Baytug a good deal, for wo are all •SiiimT Jlma' now. "B. L. »TOiw." W-d