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Bill Smiley salty syndicated scribe This newspaper often has enquiries from readers about Bill Smiley Where does he live What does he do What is he like etc This article by Shuley In Town and Country Publications will help to answer many of the queries about Smiley who Is almost a Canadian national Institution among small town and rural people Once a week an Ontario high school teacher hunches over his typewriter and stabs out a saUy little column about things like mortgages kids taxes and the cruel Canadian winter Bill Smiley who seasons weekly newspapers across Canada with hispersonalblendor sugar and spice tells It like it Is He comments on home life It Is like varicose veins or ingrown toenails He talks about family hang Momma tolerance thins with the same rapidity as Dad hair About his Job he says me a teacher in June and 111 show you a character with a crumpled shirt a wrinkled brow and a desperate look in his eye He has this to say about the puzzling business of living The Sixties produced the millions of kids who are now a mystery and terror and bewilderment to the relics of the Frightful Forties readers of his column Bill comes across as a wise irreverent and witty man It a an honest projection He writes the way he talks Sitting In his favourite chair an uncomfortable straight backed Job hell curl one hand around a drink and run the other through his thinning white hair He listens while conversation flows around him then delivers a wry and usually definitive comment in a voice as com fo as a rusty porch swing This wiry unsentimental wisdom is the reason acquaintances from eight to 84 ask him for advice exstudents invite him to their weddings and why every female he meets falls a little bit in love with him And this Is why a clipping from a Saskatchewan newspaper describes him as by for our most popular syndicated columnist Bill was born in Perth and was studying at Victoria College when World War Two began He joined the became a Typhoon pilot and took part in many dangerous missions like hitch hiking 380 miles on a forty hour pass to see a girl He regards this escapade with the same puckish spirit as the time he had to circle an airfield for a couple of hours with a live bomb hanging from his The chaps down below wouldn let him land until they had cleared all the men and machines I landed ho says like a mouse in kid gloves walking on eggs Then 1 ran like a bat out of hell in flying boots with a parachute bumping on my bum The high times were abruptly interrupted in when he was shot down over Holland and Imprisoned by the Germans He came home with a knee disabled by an S S boot and with plans to complete his Honour English course at of T There he met his darkeyed wife and he been announcing ever since that she is the root of all his They had only been married a few mon ths subsisting on love and very little money when biology threw a spanner into the works Ivy Susie to her friends became pregnant and Bill developed After a year of separation he in a she at home in HI art on they both resumed their college careers burning the midnight oil with a baby son as well as a stack of text books Bill had his eye on postgraduate studies in English with a view to teaching but tragedy intervened Ivy brother in law the editor of the Echo was drowned and there was nobody to tike over the paper BUI stepped Into the breach and for years he lived the happy harried life of a small town newspaper editor rushing to get ads out covering meetings and Women Institute met lings In addition he wrote a personal column free from editorial and reporting restrictions The little column caught on Soon other editors were picking it up and some of them paid him as much as cents a week for it fore long over eight weeklies were reprinting Snntcy s Sugar and Spice and the proofreading mailing and billing became a family industry for Bill and the youngsters Hugh and Kim When the Telegram Syndicate offered to market Bills column everybody was delighted No more sticky tongues from licking envelopes and stamps Although he was established as an editor and columnist Ihe urge to teach lingered in Bill OffhewenttoOCE Ivy managed Ihe paper Juggling interviews reports and the management of a home and family with cheerful efficiency began his teaching career in Midland where be Is new head of the English Department of he baa Joined the syndicate The Telegram tried to retaliate by featuring another well known columnist in Smiley formal but his loyal readers werenl fooled As far as theyre concerned Bill Smiley Is irreplaceable Proof of his readers a feet ton and in vehement arrives in his mailbox almost every day When he mentioned a few years ago that his daughter Kim was dangerously ill with a flood of letters arrived with pray for her recovery When he said thai in his opinion cable TV Mas ex flotation he was visited by two officials from a large cable network who suggested that perhaps he was only kidding and would BILL SMILEY like to retract or modify his statement in a later column He wasn t He Last year he wistfully remarked that he d like to get away from it all and enjoy a summer vacation with his wife perhaps in the form of an auto trip across Canada Invitations flowed in offering everything from deep sea fishing in the to dancing under the stars in British Columbia A column commenting on the BAH AI religion inspired a spirited if reply from an irate Westerner For a writer like Bill a colourful family is a definite asset His wife In whom he has referred variously as Old Lady the Battle Axe or the Boss is in reihty an intelligent and attractive lady who gets fan mail of her own is interested in and reading as he is ind plays a mean game- of chess If occasionally she does something like setting the mantle piece afire it it ill grist for Bill mill Daughter Kim beautiful redhead with a blinding smile is currently i student at College where she is earning professorial raves or her writing ability Smiley readers know all about her They have been following her exploits through Bill column from her first music ftstival to her summer hitchhiking adventures Hugh Bill handsome son wis also it university and Smiley remember columns about his piano recital his summer working on the boils and the time he broke a finger in Mexico Bill attitude to his kid is a typnil blend stilish orals look after Ihimsclvts 1 m going life without worrying about a pair of rotten ingntcs he writes out to lulp with expenses a Ls writing column says Bill It has lo in Hit Tuesday night and minute writing it is hard work I ill it whin its finished Then I either fill the glow of knowing it came off or a small work of eating away it mi and I tin t il until the column Will he Hie it l mad in Novel Then quid of them around iln 1 l flllWS llkl and lone 1 m wont have time to thtre art hours in day Bill of in turn in vitations to it writing Thi he has proven be memorable for his ItsUniri a high school graduiting diss he slid Tonight I sjm 1 good reading habits Thi choice of was a hilarious piece miscasting In 19 he opened a speech to the top of the lanadnn Union this must wonder whit a piddling little onetime flightloot is doing addressing such an august And I wondered the same He has served on the panel of judges for the Stephen Award for several years a role he because it kept him abreast of dev elopements in writing a subject in which hi is intense interested His are stated in this snippet from When I H5 be known in the Nursing Home as that old devil Smiles who pinches bottom every time you pass his wheel chair In the meantime every Tuesday night returns to his century old brick and dumps the day s crop of unmarked essavs or exams on the kitchen table He settles himself at his typewriter with a drink anything wet Coke coffee beer lea land a smoke 111 smoke till I croak and percolates his weekly ration of wry com ment Then he starts rapping with the folks in Colling wood and Seat and High River and about hundred other very important places in Canada OUR READERS WRITE says nuts to taxes TAXES NO Peanuts from Tins peanut shore Is for your mayor peanuts grown in Nassignvvcya hey rt small as you can see But match our Income he 11 t need to dig them up with axes nicy don row huge to match the taxes little things we get for sure For Hie Lord said we should not be poor The things we grow and place in store Don even pay the bills no more It seems to be our human lot To want the things we haven t got We wish that we grew dollar bills To pay for all those fancy frills Wed never bo in all this muss We Just create a huge surplus Our whole technology lacks in sense Some folks rich selling us defense Hut the would bless our humble needs If would only plant the seeds Th Ado Free Pros Wednesdiy Indecent charges A district man has been charged by Acton O P following an Incident of Indecent reported lo police last week man was apprehended on Saturday Acton have also laid another charge ayiinst the man in connection with similar incident at the Main laundromat several weeks ago Other charges from another police department are also pending 1 jist week an Acton woman had informed police of the offense witnessed by two girls These peanuts prove that kindness grows While hatred kills the lovely rose We should never have to fear ruts Or take our pay In small Peanuts Use Bibles as spiritual guide It I I should write a reply to Mrs Marthment letter In last weeks Tree I have always taught my children how the facts of evolution and the story of can be inter related and the have no Iri with what is taught in school Nor do they wince the term evolution I have seen ft in the eyes people who say evolution is nonsense It is fact that mankind has existed during the last Ji million years Also a known fact states that dinosaurs lived over million years before this How cm wc firmly believe in a seven day creation But if we lake Genesis myth a that tells a truth scientists will agree that the world probably came into being in the order mentioned there statement about students being taught they are on the same level as animals is not true I have to get our thinking out of Dark Mrs Use our Bibles as a spiritual guide and not a a science text book or a crystal ball and you will find little conflict with information taught high schools Purpose to inform public By now many of your re iders will be of petition to Premier Davis requtstini i public inquiry into the proposed hydro corridor 11 is not the intention of the Co illtion of Concerned Citizens to impede progress Neither is the intention to ive the dorimposed upon others The purpose of the petition is simply to Inform the public as to the reasons behind the proposed route and what further plans for expansion lie In store thus dispelling the rumors and fears that always surround situations like this It should be stressed that all concerned persons may sign this petition regardless of where they reside of Ontario NASSAGAWEYA NOTE5 SUPERMARKET MILL ST ACTON At their retuhr meeting on Mondjy 7 NihsaMiwcya lownslup Council loan to the treated i librarv Board in order lo pay Ihe expenses until April when the expects to receive i rant from the He id a letter from the Woman Institute which said the Institute would support any township by regulating noise The letter sold til it noise was a form of pollution and that noise is extremely bad in wintertime coming from snow vehicles Council remarked dial snowmobile control was the responsibility the province AND CAMPBELL Ml High all Who Si Hon Choose it mCjnUHHi I PC of a trucks TILDEN ANDREW MURRAY MOTORS GEORGETOWN MEAT DE SPE Can No Fresh ALCi LOIN PORK CHOPS 85 BROWN SERVE CHOPS 99 SMOKED SAUSAGE Schneiders SANDWI SPREAD SANDWICH ROLLS 3 BOLOGNA Can No Fresh Smoked Our own SIDE BAG0N 59 Pantryshelf TOMATOES Save 3 Pantry Shelf PINEAPPLE l3dVe tf I CORN OIL 2Sc 89 Robin Hood 9 Pkg CAKEPUDDING MIXES Crown lb Bottle CORN SYRUP Save 10c 39 PEAS oz Tins Save 50c 6 COFFEE Save 30c Pantry Shell Tins Save 23c I ORANGE JUICE 3 FROZEN FOOD FRESH PRODUCE DAILY CABBAGE 2 Fancy 5 lb Bag Macintosh Apples 59 Cabana BANANAS 11 I PRICES EFFECTIVE Jars WINE SAUERKRAUT 3 KERNEL CORN Leo ONION RINGS 29 EVAPORATED M MILK 39 Carnation 16 Tin COD FISH KRISPS 2 Crusty Bread BRISTOLMYERS PRODUCTS I JAVEX BLEACH Christies Old Country 4