B2 March Field trips aren t what they used to be went oo my field trip students A field trip a teacher lines up all Lands of base hits and I do mean base and trips over some tiara like six make the bus borne and bow come and what about my little girl and what kind of an educational system do we hate anyways To some a Odd trip is a day or a week off for teachers and a waste of time for students Frills snarls parent Never bad noma that nmstn round in my day seem women and fools Icng underwear and got a good Never out work in my life Says another And theyre right of course Field trips are frittsThey cost mooey which would be far better spent In drilling them on how to spdl receive even though after five years they still it redeve Or to put tosntoo together and eventually wind up knowing what a Tour is But maybe the pinchmouthed lady who refers to frills would be a different person if shed taken a page from Lady Macbeth book and put a little guts Into her old man And maybe the other guy would not be so smug If hed travelled to the East Coast and seen what a fisherman must do to earn a living Mustnt digress though Its tempting Wsitll I retire Boy this paper will burn as the column is being written I said it was my last field trip Good reasons I gave them up about ten years ago and let the younger Idealistic teachers batter their brains and bods out by Bill Smiley gainst the dim of the plan- the endless coping with teenagers the lowerage drinking privilege and the soaring wage and fuel prices that make bus trips to a major centre such an ordeal A trip to the city used to be a delight when I began teaching Always have to use that clause I was never a young teacher Id tell he principal I wanted to take all the Grade Its to see Richard Burton in Hamlet Hed say Sure Ill see about buses Id phone and order 110 tickets at two bucks each The bus would be another two bucks Wed have seats in the orch estra close enough to see the foam flying from Burtons face as he spat Oh most pernicious woman The kids would run around to the stage door for autographs Wed bead home all present replete with culture and inner excitement That was all there was to it Nowadays the field trip has become almost as complicated as one of Rommels campaigns in the Western Desert Its become a microcosm of our society in which the words I come I see I conquer have been replaced by Cover- Today one must apply to the county school board on a form Then must get principals approval usually a matter of course unless youre taking a group to study the latest pornographic movies or the latest development In top less Hawing Then one orders a block of tickets Then one sells them to the students along tfa a formidable price for the bus Then one fills out further forms with the name home rooms and individual numbers of the stud ents Then one tries to collect the money from the students who are away sick or have forgotten or have changed their minds Then one must pay the bus com up front Then one must send a cheque for the tickets Then one must Till out more forms declaring exactly who is going to be on each bus And so on And on Then one roust count and recount the students make sure they get to the theatre on time round them up for the trip home count them again like so many cattle scour the nearby taverns for the stragglers leave behind those who have vanished and return to a torrent of tirades Ive had some great trips years ago to the OKeefe Centre the Royal Alex Stratford before the purpose of the trip became smothered in a paper snowstorm Frances Richard Burton Alex Guineas Great plays students high on theatre Never mind the bus breakdown on the way home It was part of the ad venture Then the troubles began The permissive era Lowered age for young drinkers Bus prices going out of sight Creeping bureau cracy that made It a paper horror Cor the organizing teacher Took my last trip to Expo Students puking beer all over the bus after an evening in Montreal Students acting old maids who had lust tried their first dry martini The hell with that 1 said Who needs if This time I was forced into It by the sudden illness of the teacher who was organising it I think It was the ation that knocked him out I bate to admit it but I enjoyed the trip alter the lastminute hassle over the paperwork The were delightful friendly on time The show was pretty good live Shakespeare the only way to enjoy the bard There was only one hitch I took my wife Every student was in the bus seated ready for the trip home No sign of the Old whod gone shopping I paced up and down outside the bus muttering imprecations and scowling for he benefit of the kids She didnt show After minutes of this here she comes strolling along laden with shopping nags I snatched them from her hurled them into the luggage rack told her I wouldnt sit be side her and generally carried on Shed got the time mixed up The kids forgave her I stopped playing furious We got home on time Maybe Ill do more field trip before I retire But guess woo isnt going Right ShareLife The Archdiocese of Toronto Appeal tor the education of priests the developing nations Catholic Charities and Covenant HouseUnder ShareLife Sunday March 13 1983 5625 SI ShareLife Please make cheques payable to ShareLife of parish Church Street Toronto Ontario MSB 1Z8 416 Christmas Seal fund is short of new goal The Halton Lung Association announced that results of the Christmas Sesd Campaign were far less than anticipated To date the campaign shows less than a three per cent increase over last years a total of Cec campaign chairman the concerns of the board of directors when be states that the shortfall in the campaign will have an effect on programs which are usually offered free of charge to the Community The Canadian economy has certainly had an influence on personal and corporate donations he says However Halton Is dragging far behind others in less affluent areas Ontario as a whole is reporting sub stantial Increases for most of the other 33 associates Mr stated that the campaign does not close officially until March 31 and that citizens who have forgotten to send their donations still have time to do so There is only one Christmas Seal Cam paign per year in the region of Halton and this supports all the Halton Lung tion programs no government grants or any other financial support Is given outside the public commitment ASSOCIATE TAX CONSULTANTS INCOME TAX RETURN PREPARATION OFFICE HOURS Monday to Friday Saturday in toStXJp ST GEORGETOWN 8772217 ANNA DEW REGISTERED MASSAGE THERAPIST TIRED FEET Magnetic Reflexology Insole from China Stimulates your body as you walk Available from AD CLINIC CRESCENT GEORGETOWN ONTARIO Join Us this Spring for a Course in Hills Acton HI Mil Sociology of Educitlon Th Sot lolonv CI 10pm Ju Imlrunor Mr 1 Ccorgf town High 5 Community April In II con ISM MOO April IWlio in n hm- University of Waterloo