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-thoHERALD- Community News Friday July 1991 Harrys coffee club kept pot boiling I once was privy to one of the most exclusive funniest private small town coffee clubs in all the world Bar none Harry Goldham Bobs dad Morning coffee time at Harry found the most creative gang of practical jokers ever assembled behind a butcher s block with meat cleavers You see Harry was a butcher Duke Burrows Sparky Drone Slim Crawford were employees Normie Lockhurst came later Some of the others who could be considered regulars were Vince master of ceremonies par excellence employed by Canada Jack Arnold Ar nold Glove Factory Ray Whitmee cap company Henry Helfant Cpl Joe McBain of the OPP who at that time policed the town and assorted others who were regulars like me A motley crew Harrys son Bob played in the bigs with Toronto Chicago and Detroit of the NHL It was heady stuff to have your boy described on Saturday night radio by Foster Hewitt The back room of the old but cher store was the not stove lounge of today Ballard would have been a regular On very cold mornings it was not uncommon to see a brace of rum or a jig of Johnny Walkers slyly slipped into the coffee It certainly added zip to the conver and even loosened a tongue Why the donut places of today would do a lot better Im sure if they would take a leaf from Harry s book and added a little zest to their coffee We were all hockey fans and would hang on Harry s every word when he lowered his voice to whisper the latest inside rumor of trades at the Gardens A hush would silently settle over us as fa Stones by W Steamer every detail was tossed out for the like me to mull over We took small sips of coffee to make the meeting last But Harry had another side to him Hewasa practical joker Ask Henry and if Ray Whitmee Duke Burrows and Sparky Drone were alive they could roll you on the sawdust floor with colorful funny stones of some of the tricks played on old Main St Get Henry yes Henry s Clothing I talking about to tell you about the little old lady who was attracted by the sign stuck on his showroom window showing a lovely fresh fish and special printed on it The red arrow pointed to inside Henry s Clothing Store Henry was struck dumb by the little old lady s enquiry His knowledge of suits garments to Henry shirts socks underwear and ties was unquestionable When questioned about fresh fish he floundered Back at the butcher shop they were in fits laughing Henry had been suckered by Goldham and Co When you re in Henry ask him and he do a Myron Cohen fish monologue worthy of an Oscar When the OPP took over the policing of the town Joe Bain eventually was posted here and became an instant member Joe used to come into Harry every morning pull up the trap door and descend the rickety stairs to complete his morning constitutional The municipalitys facilities were not up to Harry s standards Before descending the stairs Joe would take off his tunic and revolver and hang them over a chair One morning Henry Harry Duke Sparky and Ray hid his service revolver while Joe sat oblivious to the joke being con and carried out In those days a single 60 watt bulb at the top of a l cast iron conduit high over the municipal building was the beacon that signalled the police if they were not in the of flee at the time of the call As Joe emerged from the base Harry quietly pointed out the light was on Joe grabbed his tunic and amid the coffee drinkers mumblings of maybe a bank robbery perhaps a murder he enraged when he discovered his had been hidden Only the threat of arrest of everyone produced the pistol And finally the story about Henry and Ken on a return trip to the District of Parry Sound The second time to cut ex they didnt bother with the Indian guide They got lost for three days and sought refuge and shelter on a small island Naturally they were pointed in the right direction and headed home A few hours after returning Henry phone rang and the Fire Marshall of the District of Parry Sound was asking if he knew the camp fire Henry and his friend had started had not been ex and who was your friend asked the Fire Marshall Henry in his excitement blurted out Ken Ken The Fire Marshall droned on about the costs of hundreds of men fighting the forest blaze to say nothing of failing to have a f ire permit in the fire season Henry was shaken with such disturbing news He was devastated His business could be reduced to ashes Guess what Goldham had got him again STEVEN FOSTER BA LLB BARRISTER SOLICITOR 37 MAIN ST SOUTH GEORGETOWN ONT L7G3G2 8734961 fax 8734962 FREE DAY PASS Custom Killing Cutting and Wrapping Government Inspected 4168771194 Hours Mon Wad Thura Sat a RR Ont Behind a Cmlom Meats on Trafalgar WIN A PRINT NAME THE ORIGIN AL THE WINNER OP THE TITLE WE CHOOSE WILL RECEIVE A FRAMED PRINT VALUED AT Com vbtt at the salary and fli out your during our regular Friday Saturday buetnss how AB entries must bo submitted by July 31st The winner be announced on our marquee AL MARAH STUDIO LTD 128 GueJph St GEORGETOWN 8734229