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Classified Advertising: 845â€"2809 Circulation: 845â€"9742 or 845â€"9743 Ian Oliver Publisher Robert Glasbey Advertising Director Norman Alexander Editor Geoff Hill Circulation Director Teri Casas Office Manager Tim Coles Production Manager The Oakville Beaver, ished every SundeÂ¥. Wednesday and Friday, at 467 RAd., Oakville, m of the Metroland r‘nu’ng. h ‘nqc Distributing Ltd. group of suburban newspapers which includes: Ajaxâ€"Pickering. News Advertiser, Barrie Advance, Brampton Guardian, Burlington Post, Colli Connection, Etobicoke Guardian, lown I V Acton Free , Kingston This Week, Lindsay This Week, Markham Economist and Sun, Stouffville/Uxbridge Tribune, MiltonCanadian Champion, Mississauga News, Newmarketâ€"Aurora Eraâ€"Banner, North York Mirror, Oakville Beaver, Orillia Today, Oshawa/Whitby This Week, Peterborough This Week, Richmond HilV momwvalwh:i" hed n the Gand is ied by hi. An material published in t il aver is protect i reproduction in whole or in part of this material is strictly Iorbiddcemn thz consent of the publisher. Advertising is accepted on the condition that, in the event of a typographical error, that portion of the advertising space occupied by the erroneous item, together with a reasonable allowance for signature, will not be charged for, but the balance of the advertisement will be paid for at the applicable rate. The publisher reserves the right to categorize and reject advertising. In the event of typographical error, advertising goods or services at the wrong price, goods or services may b°A sold. Adverti is merely an offer to sell and may be withdrawn at any time. what‘s bugging a substantial number of the business community in her riding....they‘re finding it almost impossible to secure financing of any kind from the mainline Canadian banks. What a surprise. Rookje Oakvilleâ€"Milton MP Bonnie Brown has found out very quickly Brown‘s address to her riding association Wednesday night was very timely because Thursday, the Canadian Imperial Bank of Commerce (CIBC) announced a three month profit, ending on Jan. 31st, of $214â€"milâ€" lion. This represents a 27 per cent increase from the same period a year ago and 12 per cent better than the $191â€"million realized in the final quarter of last year. ue t hi‘ 204000 en esns As a group, the six banks posted a combined $1.13â€"billion profit for the first fiscal quarter or 43 per cent over the same period a year ago and up 289 per cent from a $290â€"million profit in the last three months of fiscal 1993. on y Numbers like these are more than a bit mindâ€"boggling in light of the reluctance of these banks to give small business a break. And what is the federal Liberal government doing about the situation? Well, according to Brown, the government is trying "to persuade" the banks to go easier on small businesses when they come looking for loans. _The same kind of sentiment is mentioned in the Liberals‘ Red Book which says they will "challenge the banks and other financial institutions to develop concrete ways to help small and mediumâ€"sized Canadian businessâ€" es to find the capital they need." We suggest that the Liberals will have to a lot better than that to get our conservative banks to take more risks on domestic business instead of pumping billions of dollars in projects that bomb and see its small cusâ€" tomers paying for bad corporate dec1s1ons " The Liberals acknowledge that about 85 per cent of all new jobs are creâ€" ated by small business. The days of huge manufacturing plants employing hundreds and thousands of workers are gone. There are still a few such facilities still going, like Ford, but others are fighting for their lives. For their part, there‘s not a whole lot the feds can do to "persuade" the big banks to give small business a break and the banks know this. What‘s in it for them? Stuff like retaining a Canadian identity and helping the ecoâ€" nomic recovery, don‘t play too well at the banks‘ board tables. The Liberals have made a lot of promises in their ‘book‘ including the establishment of the Canada Investment Fund that will see Ottawa kick in up to $100â€"million over four years as other groups such as banks, unions, pension funds, individual investors and provincial governments kick in money. But this is for new business. What about existing businesses? Canadian business can perform well both domestically and internationalâ€" ly if it is given the chance to prove what it can do. But all too often small business entrepreneurs run up against massive problems in dealing with banks and then with government bureaucracy. The feds have also said they‘re going to try and ease the paper burden to small business but we‘re less convinced of their belief in the incredible importance of small business. The government is willing to shell out billions of dollars on shortâ€"term construction projects to get people back to work. But why was this a prioriâ€" ty over helping out small business that create permanent jobs resulting in more taxes and less social benefits. That‘s a question Bonnie Brown might kick around with her Liberal cohorts in Ottawa. Begging for dollars 467 Speers Road, Oakville, Ont. L6K 354 the word Miami? Chances are, quicker than I can say ‘kneejerk‘, the word "crime" pops up on your mindâ€" screen. There was, after all, a hit TV show called Miami Vice. Just about every edition of your daily newspaper bristles with headlines about cocaine cartels, heroin busts, and tourist homiâ€" cides. And an awful lot of those headlines are followed by stoâ€" ries datelined ‘Miami‘. Shouldn‘t be too surprising. Miami is a nice warm place, and crooks, like the rest of us, prefer to be nice and warm. We are talking about a country in which 38,000 people get shot to death every year; a country with the highest percentage of its citâ€" izens behind bars in the world. A country which boasts 200 million handguns stuffed under pillows, in underwear drawers, and in glove compartments. And those are the legally owned handguns. Nobody knows how many illegal ones are out there, waiting to go off. America has more than its fair share of criminals, armed and otherwise. Thank God, they‘re not too good at it. What? You thought American crooks were shrewd and ruthless and competent? Hardly. Not the ones that make the papers anyway. Such as Vernon Lewis, wouldâ€"be:bank holderâ€"upper.> When it comes to criminals, Miami is a real hot spot hat‘s the first thing that pops into your head when you hear Vernon entered a bank in Perth Amboy, New Jersey, one afterâ€" noon recently, and proceeded to conduct himself in classic bank heist fashion. He handed a note to the teller which read â€" "I want $100s and $50s. You have 60 seconds. I have a gun." A fine specimen, as stickup notes go. Clear, succinct, no spelling mistakes. It got Vernon $850 in hundreds and fifties. But not for long. Good as the note was, Vernon‘s choice of writing paper left something to be desired. He wrote the note on the back of an old warrant for his arrest. No points for brains, Vernon, but full marks for recycling. Then, there was the case of Michael Foster and his under age pal, who almost pulled off the perfect theft of an electronic dart gcame from a tavern. A rather...heavy electronic dart game. The lightâ€"fingered lads managed to hoist it on to the back of their pickâ€"up truck in the tavern parking lot, but when they pulled away, the truck sank up to the axles in the soft parking lot mud. Which is when Michael had his bright idea. He called Jim Paape and asked for a tow. >>Ah; thatâ€"would be Sheriff â€" â€"in her home town...Miami. BOSNIAN StAND â€"OFF Paape. In a triumph of underâ€" statement, Sheriff Paape observed, "The boys didn‘t put a real lot of thought into this." One could level the same charge at the thieves who knocked over two music stores in Kansas City a few weeks back, getting clean away with a truckload of CD boxes worth hundreds of thousands of dolâ€" lars. If they‘d had any CDs inside. They didn‘t. The boxes were for display only. How about one story in which the crooks don‘t trip over their own feet? I give you the sad tale of Mina Mullins, a young millionairess driving home alone one evening when she was suddenly rearâ€"ended. Mina pulled over, got out of her car, and found herself faceâ€"toâ€" face with two men in balaâ€" clavas. Ah, yes. The classic bump and rob gambit, in which thieves ‘accidentally‘ bump into a car, then rob the passengers when they pull over to check the damage. They took her purse and the $100,000 worth of jewelry she happened to be wearing. They also took her Mercedes. Later, a rueful Mina confessed, "I forgot all the safeâ€" ty rules when I got out of the » Car. ID° Ironic, that Mina of all peoâ€" ple should forget the rules. After all, the robbery happened in Surrey, England. Which is where Mina moved to get away from the rising crime rate back