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ar. 16, 1994 A sign of the political correct times es in a good light. Retaliatory covens damn "Hansel and Gretel" for depicting their ladies in a bad | _ time for remembering. A Pondering. Our 53rd . anniversary together. Our 1ckmo clock. Family drop ins last week for chuckles, tears, sighs. And the perennial poser for this occasion: "Tell us, Mum and Dad, in all the years, what‘s been the biggest change around you?" Ordinarily, no easy pick for us seniors, don‘t you agree? Except this time, somebody else rang a quick bell for us. An outfit called International Fund for Animal Welfare. Did you catch their two fullâ€"page paid graffiti in next day‘s papers? "How do you get away with exporting seal penises to China? Leave the seal attached," their ad broadside blared. "Ban the trade in seal penises for once and for all." Alongside, a pageâ€"deep shot of one in fullâ€"length display. That bellâ€"ringer promptly tko‘d other contenders in our grapplemaâ€" nia for our past halfâ€"century‘s ‘biggestâ€"changeâ€"forâ€"seniors title. When we embarked together in ‘41, such claptrap would have won its giggling originators a quickie rickshaw oneâ€"way to the zany compound. Stuff like that, we confess, not our era‘s incredible lab and shop initiatives, most mark the frontier between our then and now. Wonder drugs we embraced with ready facility. Jumbo jets, too. Satellite phones. Laser surgery. The catscan. Cablevision. PC‘s. Lubeâ€"free Vâ€"6‘s. Much more. Big, really big changes. Unheard of that sunlit morning we joined our lives at St. Stephen‘s altar. Treasures to marvel at and adapt to. Not so, however, that latterâ€"day newcomer, the hooded rascal "political correctness". Of which IFAW‘s seal penis pitch is the ultiâ€" mate mutant. Toâ€"date! We‘re damn near unhinged; we confess, by curâ€" rent lunacies bubbling in the "politically correct" brew. Make good use of your spare time {S pare time is not always easy l to find in our dayâ€"toâ€"day 2 schedule. However, once volunteering is part of your schedâ€" ule, the two to three hours once a week, biâ€"weekly or monthly will fit ‘mto your life easier than you think. ’.4 b"" * _ QOalkville VOI.IINTEER CENTRE: To get started choose one of the following agencies and give them a call or contact the Volunteer Centre for information or an interview at 632â€"1975. Q Anyone that is committed to proâ€"life issues can become part of the support volunteer team offering , compassionate assistance to teens }and women who suspect a pregâ€" nancy or know they are pregnant. Provide alternatives to continue the pregnancy and continue with their plans. Volunteers answer telephone calls during office hours. Contact Birthright: Maureen Murray at 825â€"1216. | Q There are opportunities availâ€" ‘ able at the Oakville Humane Society for anyone 18 years of age or older. An Office Assistant volâ€" unteer requires Word Perfect expeâ€" rience and excellent communicaâ€" tion skills (oral and written) and be available Thursday or Friday ’ morning or afternoon. Dog lovers can give the dogs a 30â€"minute walk | twice a month between 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. or Sundays from 10 a.m. to 12 _noon. Contact heather White at 845â€"1551. Q If art is your passion or you have always wanted to learn more about art, why not volunteer in the Studio Gift Shop at Oakville Galleries. The gift shop offers handcrafted pieces by artisans for sale to the public, art rental, etc. Volunteers visit potters, crafts perâ€" sons once a month to get to know the artists and their work. The gift shop is open any afternoon, seven days a week. Contact Ann Last at 845â€"5966. Q Would you prefer the conveâ€" nience of volunteering from your home? Enjoy the pleasant task of thanking first time blood donors for their donation and support of ithe Canadian Red Cross, Oakville Branch. Volunteering can be done anytime through the week or Saturdays. Contact Brenda Dunedon at $45â€"5211. light. lurking Coalition for Phenomena of change which, for us, eclipse all others of earlier vinâ€" tage. Ban "Of Mice and Men" from school libraries, demands an antiâ€" porn Alberta MPP‘s private bill. "Wizard of Oz" draws fundamenâ€" talists‘ scowls for depicting witchâ€" grants. Mary Boite Finn and Bjossa â€" Vancouver Aquarium‘s coddled killer whales â€" face exile to hostile tides and predators, No Whales in Captivity. "The reason for not putting whales in prisons stems from our own nature as moral beings," gushes CNWC‘s Bob Chorush, pitching for free publiciâ€" ty and, we presume, taxpayers‘ heralds Alliance for Nonâ€"Violent Action‘s THE OAKVILLE BEAVER pugnacious Bay Street showâ€"off march: "This area represents exploitation of Third World peoâ€" ple, exploitation of women for profit." Is there no end to this cocky shrillness, abetted by free soapâ€" boxes thanks to compliant newsâ€" rooms and politicians? Once; 33 â€"years past. our records how, Siameseâ€"carrot growâ€" ers were the fashionable headlineâ€" hunting eccentrics. Plus, gasâ€"savâ€" ing carburetor inventors. And forkedâ€"stick diviners of elixirâ€"ofâ€" life water wells. QOusted by The New Breed. Ah, what change time hath wrought! Now at Lilianne‘s Color Instructor courtesy Reg. $35 First visit only Expires March 31 her 11 NEW YORK, LONDON, ROME COLOURS/HIâ€"LITES 00 108 j Reg. from $65 [ First visit only * Expires March 31 M _A R C H 16 2 O . BORDERS BORDER *Reg. book price $19.99 to $30.99. Patterns may vary from those shown. PAINTER‘S CHOICE _ _ INTERIOR EGGSHELL LATEX * Available in 18 decorator whites ‘IP 3.78L While supplies last. CANADAS BEST PAINT WALLPAPER VALLE % IF YOU: are not satisfied with our product quality we‘ll replace the product or give you a refund; find a lower price within 30 days we‘ll refund the difference; are dissatisfied with our service we‘ll send you a voucher equal to 10% of your purchase. See inâ€"store for complete details. Sale effective Mar. 16 to Mar. 20, 1994 (Where stores open ce "**~" Sunday). Not all items available at all stores. 510 Speers Road 845â€"0848 STORE HOURS: Mon to Fri. 8:00 A.M.â€"9:00 P.M. Saturday 9 A.M.â€"6 P.M. Sunday 11 A.M.â€"4 P.M. 5% off Classique Custom Real Wood Blinds e 30 colors and finishes. e Available in 1" and 2" slats. * Guaranteed not to warp. * Custom Mini Blinds ouUrRr BEST QUALITY * Available in 120 colors. * .008 gauge aluminum. * Striping and special shapes available. * Limited lifetime warranty. *Del Mar Custom Blinds Suggested Retail Price. Toppers not included. *Del Mar Custom Blinds Suggested Retail Price. Toppers not included. ¢/" AC D FRANCHISE OPPORTUNITIES AVAILABLE CALL 1â€"800â€"387â€"7311 3105 Dundas Street West 828â€"7070 STORE HOURS: Mon to Fri. 9:00 A.M.â€"9:00 P.M. (7:00 A.M. for Contractors) Saturday 9 A.M.â€"6 P.M. . Sunday 11 A.M.â€"5 PM. Grand Classique U