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41 | O akville B eaver | T hursday,F ebruary 24,2022 insidehalton.com Seems like more and more people are say- ing "It is what it is" these days in a number of situations. Grocery store out of your favourite bread? "Well, it is what it is." Boss overloading you at work? "It is what it is." Dinner overcooked? "It is what it is" (while eating burnt chicken). Things will happen over which we have no control and can't change, and "It is what it is" is likely intended to acknowledge and not dwell on this fact. Getting upset over the out- of-stock bread is not going to make it magical- ly appear, so we're better off accepting that that's the reality of the situation. While acceptance rather than opposition or denial can be helpful to keep our stress lev- els down, it's important to draw the line be- tween acceptance and resignation. Sure, "it is what it is" can be helpful when our favourite dark rye is nowhere to be found, but there will be other situations where ex- ploring options and responses may be more helpful than deciding there's nothing to be done. So what about adding an "and" to make "It is what it is" into "It is what it is, and?" It can actually help us cope better by mak- ing the statement into "situation, acceptance, strategy." It may be simple, such as "The bread is sold out. It is what it is, and I'm going to buy another kind," or it may be more com- plex, which will encourage us to think about how we can respond. Let's take the workload example: your boss is giving you more and more to do and you're having trouble keeping up. Saying "It is what it is" shows that you acknowledge the situation, but if "It's not what it could be" is what's really on your mind, move on to your strategy. There may be times when a heavy workload is something we have to accept -- those cycles are common in many jobs -- but the "and" can lead to many helpful ideas, such as "I'm really busy at work. It is what it is, and ...": • "I'm going to talk to my boss about prio- ritizing these tasks." • "I'm going to ask a co-worker for some help." • "I'm going to ask for some flexibility on deadlines." • "I'm going to see what I can delegate." • "I'm going to make sure I take breaks throughout the day to stay focused." • "I'm going to get some extra sleep to help with managing my stress." In terms of the overcooked dinner, might I suggest: "The chicken is burnt. It is what it is ... and where is the takeout menu?" Melanie McGregor is the communica- tions and advancement specialist at the Canadian Mental Health Association Hal- ton Region Branch, which provides mental health/addiction community support and education. Visit www.halton.cmha.ca for more information and follow @cmhahalton on Twitter. DON'T MISTAKE ACCEPTANCE FOR RESIGNATION BE SURE NOT TO GET CARRIED AWAY WITH 'IT IS WHAT IT IS' MINDSET, WRITES MELANIE MCGREGOR MELANIE MCGREGOR Column The Oakville Beaver values the opin- ions of its readers, and the community at large. With that said, we welcome your let- ters to the editor on all matters that impact area residents. We ask that letters be no more than 275 words, and include the full name and town of the writer. Your address and telephone number must also be included for verifica- tion purposes only. We do not publish anonymous letters. Letters will be edited or rejected for offen- sive content, factual errors, legal issues or space restrictions. Send your letters to in- sidehalton@metroland.com. 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