The following text may have been generated by Optical Character Recognition, with varying degrees of accuracy. Reader beware!

-T- r2 F || MUBMHIL BA1XAD •» WA8U WKK. Hor voice wa« sweat ae a ban-go-lin> .4 Ht-r month was flma'1 a*the taoad of » J»# if Hfr eye« ran up, hor chin ran down-- 5, Oh,«ahr WM thevelle of Yeddo town., 3 J How lovwljr Wa*kaJ8ingty We®, < H -ft.. *' 80 good to hear, anl sweet to see, § Th« fairest inaiilen in .11 Jim a&d FeU dead in lovefwlth a Turkish ;;7irTv* JS-:.-.»• S$ nil Turkish man a tartan M ' This Turkish man was sly and bad feyx Ha whispered auto Mis* Waska Wee • "Ofiy me to my own Turkefl , "O fly with me to my own TurkMt And robes of gold I'll give to the#-- A girdle of p^arl and love for liffc If thou wilt be my eightieth wife." k How Simple Waska Slngty Wee. & 80 good to hear, ao fair to aw, Reeolrcd behind her bashful fan v4; 1 o be eightieth wife to thia Turkish man; " f But though her h«srl w» fnll of glee, 1- tshe hnng her bead and said to hit: .? .15 " If thou sbouldst die, my Turkish beau," Where would pocr waska Singtv go?" Then this horrid, sly. old Turkish man *•* Declared he'd die on the English plan. 'il " And so." said iie, " my brigis-T.-iuged bird, Thou It have for thy fortune the widow'a thffd.' Then flew the maid to the Mi-ka-do, And told the plan of her rurtti*h bean. " And now," said she, " the wMe thou "at heard, How mttob will it be, this widow'a third?" Now the Mi-k*'rf«waa wendroas wisaj H© opened his mouth and shut bi« eywtj '••liie widow'» »liir4, H doughto;*, wiB bt Whatever tii-3 law will Allow to thee.'* Then flew the maid to the Court of Lord#, v Where avery man wore a braoe of awente, , And bade them name what sum would be hart When her Turk should go to his fore-fa-tharo They sat Jin council from dawn till night. And sat again till morning light-- Fignred and wanted and weighed to aee What an eightieth widow's third would be; And the end of it all, aa you well might know, £.«»>,% hnt grief to the Turkish bean; Tor krvelv Waska Singty Wee _ Said: " do back mkme to your old mrkee 1" --Scribmtr for Jfov. H1LLB HAJETWE1'1/H IWMBIISP* ING. have heard mother MY. That's all, t believe--no, there's the aauoe; there must be some kind of sauce. Shall it be apple or cranberry? For this onoe, cranberry; it's an abominable job to pare apples, and it .stains one's hands so shockingly; and Horace can't endure stained hands. I'll go and make a to. now." And suiting the action to the word, Nellie, after some search, four. * the coal shovel, and put into the stove a peck of coal and aa Ignited • bunch of friction matches, then stood quietly awaiting the conflagration v hich was to ensue. Noth­ ing alarming occurred; there was con­ siderable smoke, and a powerful, strong smell of brimstone, but no great fire. She concluded that the matches didn't get fairly burning, so she tried another bunch; and believing this could not fail of accomplishing her design, slw rewired to the pantry as the next field of opera­ tion. After considerable thought on the subject, she decided to make the pud­ ding firet; it would be the most difficult job, she argued. Well, how "was it to be made? "The Revised American Cook Book and Delicate Housewife's Especial and Valuable Friend in Need " was called in play. TJiere was a para­ graph on the cover to the effect that you would find everything worth knowing with the peatle elevated over her head. The cat, to avoid the impending blow, made a sidelong spring, knocking down a shelf which held several vessels of milk, and this shelf falling upon the egg basket, smashed a chosen dosen of as good eggH as ever a hen caoklfd over. Nellie had quite a mind to sit down in the midst of the ruin and indulge in a good cry ; but she controlled herself,and after mopping up the milk, to the great detriment of her white garments, she went out into the kitchen to see what progress the fire was making. There was not the least vestige of a fire about the premises, and poor Nellie was in despair, .Just then she spied a boy go­ ing by, and called out: " Here, boy, here f 111 give you nine- pence to do a little job for me. The boy's eye glistened at the pros­ pect, ssd he obeyed her call with nlanrity; but, when she told him to make a fire, he laughed in her face. However, he waa a capable lad--aa Nellie thought-- and ere long, by his skillful application of kindlings, a brisk fire *.rras, in progress. The stipulated price was paid, and Nellie considered it a good bargain. The pudding was in the oven, the potatoes in the pot, the steak on the gridiron upon the top of the stove - erasing ww* en tmine, By-and-by within the lids of that invaluable casket [ the dripping from the fat began to smell of diamonds; and Nellie fondly believed rather unpleasantly ; it wiled the room "My dearest Nellie!" " Dear Horaoe!" " And you will be content to take me as I am--a poor clerk, with only seven hundred a year t Will you be happy to pans life with me in a small house, and attend to the domestic affairs your­ self ?" " Yea, Horaoe." "But, have you considered, my bent beloved, how neat a burden this may sometimes be ! ' " A burden! O, Horaoe, as if any­ thing that I could do for you would be a burden! A sweet little vine-wreathed cottage will be delightful. A cozy house all to ourselves, and no prying housemaids to spy into everything we do, and prate of my faults and failings to the whole neighborhood." "And no burnt steak and black oof- fee ! Doubly delicious the ambrosial nectar that your -lily hands shall pre­ pare, my day-star, my wife--that is to Immediately upon this followed a con­ cussion which made the windows clatter as in the breath of a tempest; and, from what little experience we have had in such promises, we must venture to affirm that he kissed her--which of course sealed the compact. Horace Hartwell was a fine-looking young fellow of twenty-three--a clerk in the jobbing-house of Martin & Turner ; and Nellie Armsfcad was the daughter of a man who, though by no means wealthy, had a wonderful talent for ap- rrmg bo. In this laudable endeavor w»s aided by his wife--a handsome, showy woman, who brought his daugh­ ter up to ornament the parlor, to the utter exclusion of the kitchen. There­ fore, Nellie was well qualified by edu- tion to become the mistress of a house, and the regulator of its domestio af­ fairs. Horace Hartwell had fallen in love with her pretty face at a picnic ; and, on obtaining an introduction, the infatua­ tion had increased, until he came to the conclusion that he could not live with­ out her ; and Nellie was firmly con­ vinced that she should pine away and die if separated from Horace. And hav­ ing succeeded in convincing Mrs. Arm -stead of this fact, that lady informed her husband, and the good man had nothing to do but consent to the marriage which was to be the means of savstg two valu­ able iiv«L On .line,' sun.. ..-nsnj«% in S&vy, Horace and JN,eJJ*v oiwa uct~ frym»n, And after that people called Nel­ lie Mrs. Hartweli, and congratulated her on the happiness which TT&B within her reach. The young couple took up their resi­ dence in a neat, one-story house, a little removed from the bustle of the city, and easy of access from the store where Hor aoe was employed. And here they first came to realize that Longfellow was not far from the truth when he said, "Life is real, life fe earnest." Their house was comfortably, if not luxuriously, furnished, and an ample stock of the good fellings of life waa laid in for Nellie to exercise her skill upon as a cuisinier. When everything 'was put to rights, and Horace had gone to his place of business, leaving many a lover-like Has on the white forehead of his wife8 to­ gether with the intimation that he would expect dinner at three o'clock, Nellie consulted her watch and found that she had full four hours in which to prepare that important meal. She would dress before »he commenced doing anything ^ about the kitchen, she thought; she had read 30 much of untidy housekeepers, it Beyer should be said she went round the house in slip nhod shoes or dingy wrap- pars. O, no ; housework Hhotud never make a s'tovet of her. 80 Nellie went up to her chamber, ar- ncged her hair in becoming ringlets, donned H pretty white caahmere peig­ noir ov^r an embroidered skirt, and with u Mack velvet bracelets on her arms and a blush rose in its own sweet buds and foliage on her bosom, _it must be con­ fessed that little Nellie looked pretty enough to challenge anybody's admira­ tion. *' Let me s»e," qooth she, meditating, " What sh»ll I h»w« for dinner ? Horace is fond of broiled steak; I've heard him ' • so. And pudding; yes, there must that people in general prefer speaking truth to IA lie! So she opened the book in full faith touching its veracity, " Bice pudding., init the rice to soak in luke-warm water, having picked it cleaa of all impaxitxesi; and milk, sugar, and Fait to your taate. A little nutmeg said a couple of eggs improve it." "Goodness me!" ejaculated Nellie, " how am I to know anything about it, 1 wonder ? How much is a little nutmeg f And how much rice, and milk, and sugar, will be enough? And, as I live, if there am't the awfulest smut spot upon my skirt! I must wash that out the first thing!" And, forgetful of pudding and dinner, she flew to the wash bowl, and serabbed the soiled cambric till its gap­ ing thread® cried eloquently for quarter. By the time thia was cleansed she espied a second spot, located on the sleeve of her dressing-gowBp and this must undergo the same elaborate pro­ cess as the former blemish. When this much was gone through with, she saw that the rose on, her bosom was in a dis­ abled condition--the rose itself being among the missing, and the two delicate buds broken and wilted. So Nellie had to go up staim and get a fresh blossom. Horace admired flowers, and thought Nellie became them amazingly. "Now the pudding must be mixed, for oertain," said she, assuming an air of pretty importance, which, unfortun­ ately, no one was there to see. " Let me read that recipe over again. 1 Pick it clean of all impurities.' I wonder if that means the water, or the rice. It can't mean the rice, assuredly, for that is as clean as it possibly can be ; it is the double refined--no, double distilled-- mercy I strange that I should forget label on the box! Well, it is purs rice, that don't need any picking, anyway. How much rice will it take ? Goodness! I wish the cook book was a little more definite. Some time, I'll write one my­ self, that will give all the particulars to a teaspoonful. Well, we shall want the large white dish full; 111 measure it, and see how much it holds." And away flew Nellie to gauge the pudding dish, in order to calculate the quantity needed for the pudding. She found the plate capable of containing two quarts, and from this alie concluded that two quarts of rice would be quite enough. The extravagant item was measured out, and committed to a tin pan full of water to undergo the soak­ ing process, and Nellie surveyed with dismay what remained in the box. " Dear me! it must be a terrible ex­ pense to koep house--here's every bit of that rice gone for a pudding; and Horace only having $700 a year. I must try to be very saving. I won't use as much sugar as I intended to; and the recipe says a little nutmeg--and I much as that. Economy be padding; a rice one, I guess will be fees!. And then there must potatoes and bread. That will eatables; now for. the Aunt Keziah says, coffee, chocolate, or doesn't feel very well, tea; tea helps •office for the driakahles, as tea, ead be won't put in so is a real virtue. Soliloquizing thus to herself, Neliie mixed the rice, water and all, with s cupful of milk, a teacupful of s«gar, two unbeaten eggs, a half a cup of salt, and a few grains of aiutmcg. This ^--Lous compound she put into the OV6S1 of the " 3ve wid ^ pr~cccded to examine the Sra. Thia ms not ao e^Ily doiiti, ̂ there 173S no fk© to be ossi^med. Nel­ lie thought she nover did see such a con­ trary stove in her life; and by way of improving its contumacious disposition, she poured two or three spoonfuls of burning fluid on the ooai, and then touched a Inciter to it. The effect was astonishing; the covers of the stove were blown off like a beaver in a nor'wester, and the fire proved to be a mere " flash in the pan. " Never mind," said Nellie, in a con­ solatory tone; MI guess it will kindle; there seems to be a small blaze under­ neath." The potatoes were brought next, and baring carefully peeled them, t»he placed them in a kettle with some water and put them over the stove. Then she cut the steak--and her finger at the name time ; and the extraordinary gyration which she made under the influence of the pain upset the flour bucket into the slop-paM and entangled her crinoline in the nooks of the steelyards which de­ pended from the wall. It was a long time before she could break clear from these tenacious intruders; the steel frame-wwrk of her skeleton held on like true metal, and the hooks of the steel­ yards were bound not to let go ; go a compromise was made, and Nellie di­ vested herself of the warlike garment and disengaged the oombatants at her leisure. Nellie had heard her mother's cook say that pounding meat made it tender and, in pursuance of this knowledge, she put the pieces of steak into a mortar and pounded them until the perspiration streamed down her face and her arms ached with the exertion. As for the meat, it is best not to say much regard ing the appearance ; but it more strong ly resembled a poultice than anything While she was thus engaged the cat a family^pet---had taken possession of the remainder of the steak, and waa en joying it to her feline heart's content, in the shadow of the piokle jar. "Seal, scat, you beast! Shoo, scat, there! Shoo, I say!" cried Nell, drop ping th ̂mortar, and making at poesy •M* with smoke so dense and stifling that poor Nellie's eyes grew red and tearful; and the tortured meat siszled and hissed, and turned black as a bear's skin. Nellie threw open the doors and stuck to her task of turning the grid­ iron, resolved in vulgar, though ex­ pressive, parlance "to grin and bear it." The pudding boiled over a oontinued stream ; the potatoes bounoed up and down in the kettle like cockle shells in a stormy sea; the steak groaned and spit, and in the midst of it aH the dock struck three. Punctual to the hour, Horace's step sounded in the entry., the kitchen door was flung open with a lover's impetuosity, mid that individual invaded the smoky room. " Good gracious, Nellie! in the house on fire? Come here this moment, dar­ ling. What under the canopy ails your face f It's blacker than the aoe of spades --begging your pardon 'for the compari­ son. Do look into the glass, Nell I He wheeled her round toward the mir­ ror, and surely the picture there pre­ sented was not tiie most attractive one that a young husband might wish to look upon. The ashes which had been evolved from the stove through her unremitting attempts to make a fire had settled on her hair, until her head was as white as that of an ancient militia captain, pow­ dered for training day. One long curl had dipped itself in the hot water, over which she had been standing in vain effort to scrub the Btains from her clothes, and it was straightened out as perper dicular as a candle, and hung, dripping with water, down her back. To finish the tout ensemble, a streak of smut ex­ tended from, her left temple across her nose to her right cheek, and at- sight- of the ridiculous figure sho made poor Nellie burst into tears. This only made matters worse; but Horace, like a true hero, kissed away the teurs9 s#ot and all, transferring by far the larger portion of the latter substanoe to his own face. Then he off coat, turned up sleeves^ and announced himself ready to assist about the dinner. In this respect Horace was a jewel, and his wife blessed him for the generous heart which prompted his ready sympathy. ' But his abilities a&a cook were in no wise equal to his He turned the steak, and lost half of it in the fire through the bars of the gridiron, " set" the table with the olotn wrong side out, the knives in the spoon-holder, the butter in the preserve bowls and mistook the pudding dish foe the meat plate. The potatoes were fished out of the pot, boiled to a complete mash ;' not one particle was left upon another; and Horace, to his wife's dismay, insisted upon straining potatoes and water through the dish-oloth, in the hope of saving the remains. At last they sat down to dinner--ba­ ker' brand, suspicious-looking butter, meat, and a pie from the confectioner's. The pudding was to answer for the des­ sert. Is ttiere tea or coffee, dearest?" 3S]&D '©>r.xe, looking <--"D^IOUS!Y OTBT the table. " Good&ess, u I 'uldii't Wot it !" ollie, ^lioging up with such force k> Bpsst tlso oasto-r, end send the wegar tc ilijp iloor. "How much tea will it take for us?" " I don't know, I'm sure," said Hor­ aoe, slowly. "What does your cook­ book say ? ' Nellie consulted the work. " It says ' a quantity proportionate to the size of the family^ How much would that be for us? " '• Well. I don't know; abdut a cup foil, I should think." So a cup full was put into the urn; hot water was added, and the two house­ keepers sat down and waited patiently for the steeping to be finished. At last the tea was drawn; Horaoe sugared and creamed it, aad put the cup to his lipa. " Good heavens! " cried he, in dis­ may, it is strong enough to bear up a long-boat; and black, too. No more black ink needed in this house yet awhile. We must drink water to-dky. There, them, never mind; II was all my work." Nellie's tears had begun to flow agarn, and Horace leaned over the table to kiss her forehead, upsetting the tea at the "Why, Horaoe!" in alarm, " what is the matter with the pudding?" "Salter than aalitnAa»l Do Hole, Nell!" - One mouthful was tmfictaat, N«lli«*a pretty face was screwed up into a him- dredjraekers. "Why, Horace, who would have thought it? I only pat in half a cup­ ful." Dinner passed off rather soberly. Nel­ lie was mortified at the ill success of her hard work. Horace was obliged to unit the table hungry, and we all know that a man with an empty stomach, and tho prospect of that organ's remaining thus, is a a formidable animal. However, his good humor returned directly. He kissed Nellie good- by, and left her to the task of washing the dishes--no easy duty, by the way. The dinner and its accompaniments were but the prototype of many another dinner. It would be infinitely amusing to the reader to follow Nellie Harwell through the four weeks following her removal to a house of her own. She invariably forgot to make the bed until she went up stairs to retire ; the lam^ were never filled till the mo­ ment they were wanted; the carpets were swept after she had dusted the furniture ; she boiled the calico clothes and the white onen tMgeiher, made starch of cold water ; ironed Horace's dickies wrong side out; sewed up the fingers of his glomes; mistook salt for saleratus and tartar emetic for salt; burnt the mear» forgot to sweeten the Xnge cake, and made a hundred other nders that eveiy inexperienced housekeeper can imagine for herself,. A month of this kind of existence passed away, and Nellie broached a plan to ner nujsbaud. Hossc© was only soo delighted to consent. Their house was shut up; the young man went to a board­ ing house and Nellie went to Aunt Martha Chase, a widowed sister of her father, whe resided in m country town some twenty miles away. Aunt Martha was a lady mora oele- brated for the exoellenoe of her pies and preserves than for the number of her flounces, and under her tutelage Nellie became, in time, what every woman should be, without regard to her station, a good housekeeper, And when at the end of three months she went back to her own house, there were no more salt puddings or burned steaks. Little lady, think well beforehand, if the adoration of your accepted lover will live after marriage if fed upon bad bread and black coffee. The Influence of Newspapers* A school teacher, who had been a long time engaged in his profession, and wit­ nessed the influenoe of a newspaper upon the minds o! a family of children, writes as follows : I have found it to be a univer­ sal fact, without exception, that those scholars of both sexes, and of all ages, who have access to newspapers at home, when compared with those who have not, are: 1. Better readees, excellent in pronunciation, and, consequently read more understandingly. 2. They are better spellers, and define words with ease and accuracy. 3. They obtain prac­ tical knowledge of geography in almost half the time it requires of others, as the newspapers have made them acquainted with the location of the important places of the nations, their government and do­ ings on the globe. 4. They are better grammarians, for, having become famil­ iar with ©very variety of stylea in news­ papers, from the commonplace adver­ tisement to the finished and classical oration of the statesman, they more readily comprehend the meaning of the text, and constantly analyze its construc­ tion with accuracy. 5. They write bet­ ter compositions, using better language, containing more thoughts, more clearly and more correctly expressed. 6. Those young men who have for years been readers of newspapers are always taking the lead in debating societies, exhibiting more extensive knowledge upon a greater variety of subjects, and expressing their views with greater fluency, clearness, and correctness. IV MlMlnMppl Mound-Banders. A went writer upon this subject hu grouped mtme farts oonoerning the notuid builders. Front these facts we my reasonably iuf«ur: 1. That tbemouiul bnllders had an or- (FMiiaed autocratic government, in whioh tlw individual was merged in the state, and thus their rulers could undertake and complete the great works, the re­ mains of whirh are found in tins age. 3. The mound-builders wew* a latM»i> Nothing but the united labors of many thousands of men could accomplish such £reat works as have survived the leveling influenoe of time through thousaii'Js of y»»ar«s il. The mouud-builders were not no­ mads, but had fixed habitations. 4 . They were numerous and gregari­ ous, dwelling in populous cities, m at­ tested by the groupings of the mounds. 5. The mound-builders were acquaint­ ed with many of the practical arts of civilized life. They smelted copper, wrought stone, molded clay into useful forms, built houses, reared mounds, which, like those of Otolum, Uxmal, Palenque and San Juan Tectihuacan, were no doubt temple-crowned in the distant past. They manufactured salt, made cloth, and had vessels fitted for many uses,, rney cultivi»t«l the soil, lasaed com. melons, ptunpkiiis and squashes, and subsisted in a large degree on the fruits of the earth. We know not how many'emfroies may have rolled away since the most- recently built of their cities became waste and desolate. Many centuries,' we know, must have elapsed Bine© the last mound- builders were expelled or exterminated from the Mississippi valley. Only relics of the most durable character have been fom«dv Yast and splendid cities built like an­ cient Sardis of canes and rushes and other perishable materials may once have covered the plains around the temple mounds and about the citadel walls all traces of which have passed away. In the construction of some of the pyra­ midal groups of mounds in the xazoo oonntry the labor of many thousands of men must have been called into requi­ sition through many years to complete the work. There is no evidence that any of the mounds were ever constructed as the foundations of dwellings for the people. The pyramidal mounds of the Missis­ sippi valley are similar in form to the teooalis of the region further south. On some of those we know that temples were erected. In the ruins of Chi-Cbea,, Yucatan, there is a pyramid of hewn stone surmounted by a temple which must onoe have presented a splendbd appearance. In th© valley of the Mis­ sissippi materials were atraixdant for the construction of light buildings. In many of the localities once densely pop­ ulated by the modnd-builders, no stone could be had. Of course no structures of wood could survive the lapse of so many ages* 80 the cities and habita­ tions of the mound-builders have all vanished, and in the imdisturbed quiet of many centuries giant trees and tan­ gled vines usurped the spaces once worn smooth by the pattering feet of throng­ ing myriads of men who have utterly perished from the earth, leaving no me­ morial of their arts behind them. Opening of a Remarkable Bailway In London-, The London papers announce a further extension of rapid transit in that city by the ••completion and opening for public i&21c of the East London railway, which is' another of these ^jgnntic underground ente*pil3es f :•? i?hich .the '.mefcwpolis of Eagl&Ed is so distinguished. The most reMasitiblo fcatur© of this new work is' the fact that a considerable portion of the line is built under water. The com­ merce of the worLl may be said to float and navigate directly over a part of the roof of the tunnel, whioh extends south­ easterly,, from the Liverpool street sta­ tion of the Great Eastern railway, pass­ ing directly under the warehouses and water basin of the London docks, thence under the embankment, across and un­ der the Thames river, to the New Cross station of the Southeastern railway, thus connecting all the roads named, and also the Loudon and Brighton and South London lines At Shadwell Mid White- chapel, magnificent stations, each four hundred and fifty feet in length, have been erected. The total oost of this new line, whioh is a little less than six mijflu in length, has been £3,200,000, or sixteen millions of dollars. OWN ORDER OF HOBIUTT. Site potent «f nobility farther back than history, Or any parchment acroll, Or ooat» of arma of ancient Orsnyntlc aigiw, or aelphie Tto written In the BOUL ,V . ^ • __ 1 blood la that which never Wfcen emr'i «word the right It liahti like a Same, tnnoocnce i» trodden down: « whiten* no* before the crown vf laurel worn by fame. KU SSKliL'45? blo®d>when be«rli an taw f; XoproTe the paining current bW®®*'""* w?iT."5m*.*nd date, and birth, «*«<» when left alone; Heia the king upon the throne Who hw trne moral worth. ooat *f arms he aeeda MM*':. OM Pedro's Country. All intelligent travelers who have vis­ ited Bmal speak in the most glowing terms of the country. Prof. Agassiz re­ garded it as the most productive and in­ teresting country on the globe, and the one in which it is easiest to obtain a live­ lihood. Some wfeo have sailed up the Amazon declare that a vessel can be loaded with Brazil nuts at an expense of of only a few cents per bushel. These constitute a valuable article of com­ merce^ while the oil extracted from them is very desirable. All the tropical fruits are produced in Brazil almost without cultivation. The soil in many parts the country will produce twenty succes­ sive crops of cotton, tobacco,, or sugar­ cane, without the application of manure. No country in the world approaches the land oi Bom Pedro in the -variety of its forest productions. Prof. Agassiz etatpe that he saw 117 different kinds of able woods that were out from a piece of land not half a mile square. They rep- and many d them were capable of re­ viving a high polish. Ono fur- siiJL~3 vrax feat ia asad ; fa- other a pith which is used for food, and still another yields a juice which is used in the place of intoxicating liquor. There is a single variety of palm from which the natives obtain food, drink, clothing, bedding, cordage, fishing- tackle, medicine, and the material they manufacture into dwellings, weapons, harpoons, and musical instruments. Doubtless the day is not distant when the valuable woods of Brazil will be used for various useful and ornamental pur­ poses. Brazil is not only " a wooden country," but a country that produces the moat beautiful woods in the world. Manufacture of Amerleaa Silks. At the annual meeting of the Silk As­ sociation of America, held in New fork city last week, reports were read show- ing that the American silk manufactnr- same time into tfie bosom' of his white J ers are prospering, and rapidly meeting vest. The amount of eaiorio contained the demands of home consumption. The in the fluid was decidedly unpleasant, ' " " " and poor Horaoe, under the influenoe of the pain, kicked over his chair and broke the looking-glass with the flourish of his elbows. Then he begged Nellie's par dwi, picked tip th© ohair," removed the fragment- of the mirror, kissed his Ni- ob© of a wife, Mid'sat down to finish his dinner. Alas far Ms appetite J The steak was nothing but a biixni cinder--- outrageously detrimental to molars and incisors; the potatoes were non est; and Horace saved all his powers for the pudding. And he had need of them. The dessert was brought on and poured into its appropriate reoeptacle, and Horaoe helped himwlf and his wife to bountiful portions, ^ " Turk's island t and crystallized limestone! " cried he, dropping his first mouthful back into plate. " JMJI'S wife must have been imported in the last steamer." total value of American silk goods manu­ factured in 1875 was $27,158,071; Amer­ ican sMk ribbons manufactured were valued at $4,807,985, and the value of imported silk ribbons was only $2,984,- 271. American manufacturers of sewing- silks and twist we stated to b@ compet­ ing successfully with the English manu­ facturers in fh@ Canadian market. A marked feature of the increased activity in the silk trade of Paterson, N. J., last year, has been the immigration of a number of so-called master silk-weavers from France and England. These men individually own several looms, whioh in some instances they have brought with them. They mmy on weaving _ at their homes, one or more room® being fitted up for that purpose. BABBITS killed 300 apple trees for a Minnesota farmir recently, by gnawing the bark off. Clvilteed In TS. the Savages. In regard to the relative strength of men in different places, investigations s.iow that of twelve natives of Van Die- men's Land the mean sbength of their arms was 50.6; of seventeen natives of New Holland it WM 50.08, and of their loins 10.2; of fifty-six natives of the iaUnH of Timor it was 58.7, and of their loins 11.6; of seventeen Frenchmen it was 69.2, and of their loins 15.2; and of fourteen Englishmen it was 71.4, and of their loins 16.3. The causes of this weakness on the part of savages are suf­ ficiently obvious in their poor and scanty food, want of clothing and shelter, and the various comforts which tend to nour­ ish and support the human frame* Wherever man is found in a state of na­ ture he is n«!oessarily surrounded by dronmetanoes unfavorable to existenoe, ,\nd certainly to physical development and prowess--immense tracts ©f forest oover iue land, large masses of water stagnate on the earth, noxious and pes­ tilential vapors remain unrelieved, fero­ cious and venomous animals have con symily to be guarded against, and, o course, the lack of means to efficiently combat these and other disadvantages te id to weaken the vital forces. Most of those who have traveled in barbarous climes unite in saying that they seldom some across an old man ; and the same causes, apart frcm violence,, whioh tend to shorten life, may be reasonably ex­ pected to diminish strength. fee title roringa from noble dftNfct ;*'* ^M^crowned and tail, ^ ̂ ® •**»d«, like stane high tower that SiaH • *^*dow on tne petty kings. Like the anointed Saul. • "n • Atfrown may be a vacant show ..•A scarf of atars, a blind in* do* Cold the embroidered "«if • ' A title, not a title deed, The acepter but a broken reed. A dunce Vi block the throne/ At home, in school, let youth be tinafil To win nobiMty of thought; Thought# are the fruitful feeda, 8o«m broadteant in our daily walki Thfiy bud and blossom on the ataali ^ Of dally life in. deeds. ' ' Pltis sr»i Lrnro in wait.: .False soaleik'.' ; A MAM who has nothing to seize is m eaqy circumstances. TSQEBB is plenty of game in the Blade Hills. ^Seven-up " and " poker " pre­ dominate. "TH* last galoot's A. Shore," who was arrested for cruelly beating his wife, in Louisville, last week. Ax exchange has an article headed, "The latent agony at dinner parties^** The editor must have been luxuriating in fresix cucumbers. TOMMI (suddenly, on his way home from church)--" Wh*t did you oufc of the bag, mamma f I only got six­ pence ! Look here!" " WHAT isoenscienoe) "askedasohool- 6 master. "An inward monitor," replied! a bright little fellow,, "And what's a monitor!" "One of theixon-oiads." A COMPOSITOR, setting up a report off a horse race, said " the fool-sellers were busy," instead of " the pool-sellers," but it did not alter the sense of the para*, graph much. A mttls boy, whose oonduot made his mother say that she feared he did not pray, replied : " Yes, Ido; |pray, every night, that God will make you and pa Ike my ways better." PUBMCAN--" Your dog's very fat, sir. Pray what do you feed him on f " Trav­ eler--"Well, he has no particular meals; but whenever I take a glass of ale I give him a biscuit, you know ?" IT would do some of the first settlers of Jamestown, Va., good to come to life and take a peep at that town. They would find everything about as they left it, only looking a little older, with more knot-holes to be seen, A PAST youth asked at a Trisoo res­ taurant: "What have* yon got?" "Almost everything/' was the reply. " Almost everything ? Well, save me a plate of that. " Certainly. One plate of hash!" yelled the waiter. A xvmx tall man was in the streets of Boston, when an old lady who admired his gigantic stature, thus addressed him : "Mister, were you large when yon were small f" "Yes, marm, I was- considerable big whoa I was little.".. "Mx boy, tell us what you know about rattah t" said the committeeman. " It is sometimes called the 1 Calamus* Bottang ; comes from Penang, Samar- ang, and Padang,' and is used by the master in this school too dang often." As Pat up the ladder waa climbing one day, Hie hod filled with bricka, the usual way, A fresh landed brother from over the aea, Half seas over, or at least seemed to be, Called up from the street, with a oomioal wink, "Oome down, ye spalpeen, and let's take a> drink." "Bedad and I will," says good-naturad Pat, " Then I'll carry my bricks inside o' my hat." " MONDAY was on© ' of those dreary, rainy days when & man stays at home all day and pulls out all. Ms private papers, with a view to straigthemng things, and after looking them carefully mm$ leaves them in a heap on the table lot.1 Ms wile to pat away." IK one of Beethoven's letters, in which he gives Ms publishers the cor­ rections of some proofs of a stringed •ijuiulot, la ' concludes by -.racing «h»s "It is four o'clock; I must post this, and I ion quite hoarse with stasupiag and swearing." A NEW YORK lawyer employed anew boy the other day, and when the lad asked for instructions, the attorney re­ plied : "Your instructions are to be taken in general Keep the office clean, borrow ootd whenever you can, and under no oiroumstauea must you ever lend my umbrella to a lawyer.'1 A BOT-RKFOBMBB, in a speech a few evenings since,, made this remark ; "I have three good reasons for keeping the fledge not to use tobacco ; first, because am to have $5 at the end of a year _ second, because I have pledged my self I not to use it; and third--the strongest motive of all--because IH get a licking if I don't keep it!" It is unnecessary | say to that the speech was applauded. A DWRUIINO house on Clifford streetl look fire in one of the chambers the I other night from an exploding kerosene I km p. 'The flames were extinguished I after a sharp struggle by a woman of thel house a who had her hands pretty badly I burned. She was relating her adventures! to a neighbor next morning, and thel womaa asked s "Why didn't yon mise| an alarm--where was tieesye f " Bessie and her beau were oourtmg in the par­ lor," was the calm reply. "And yot never called to theml'r "Not a wOrd.| I have known of cases where a suddet alarm has upset a young man just as he was about to propose and changed the whole future of two lives."--Free OK the 18th of Jane, 1776, the to of Sheffield, Mass., voted that if th Continental Congress would declare th oolonies independent, its inhabitan would solemnly engage with their li . and fortunes to support ^them in the: measures. This event will be eelebraf on the 18th, 19th and 30th of June, year, Bishop Janes preachmg^tbe -- pinl sermon on the first day. A TUBUS* in Howtnc, (I*., kid eggs the other day.