Illinois News Index

McHenry Plaindealer (McHenry, IL), 13 Oct 1880, p. 7

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wmmm sff ;;.- •*• }u«t one thing m man can htn I® «I1 this world of woe and itrtfe, ^k«t mmfeos thr business not tws baa. And th*t one thing's an easy wife. •o*t fancy that I love my girl F«r rosy checks or raven hair? ®>e holds my heart because ghe laughs Because she laughs, and doesn't owe. I pet my boot" just where it suitv •And find t.taem where I put than, too; That is a thing, you must allow, A chap can very seldom do. I leave my paper* on my desk; She never puts litem in a heap, ®r takes to light the kitchen stove Tte very one I want to keep. tti winter night my OOIT dame Will warm her toes before the fire; <3h* never aoelds about the lamp, Or wants the wick a trifle higher. On Sundays she is not so tine But what her ruffle* I can hug; * flight my wipe just where I please, And spill the ashes on the rng. The bed is never filled with "shamaT'-- A thing fivmc women rilely plan To worry serranta half to death, And spoil the temper of a man. lets me s'.e«'p to any hour, Nor rises any horrid din If it Just happens, now and then, To be quite late when I come in. ' Itetl yon, Jack, if you would wed, ^ Just get a ^jrl who lets things run; She'll keep her temper like a lamb, Aurf h< lp you on to lots of fun Don't look for ni( n»y, style or si vow, * Or blushing beauty, ripe and rare; Just take the one who laugh? at fate-- Who laughs, and shows she doesn't care. Yo« think, perhnp«, our household ways Are just perchance a little mixed; 1 Or when they get too horrid bad, •We stir about and get things fixed. • What r'naipejisation has a man VVbo earns his bread bv sweat of brow, If home is made a bailb -gvound, And life one long, eternal row ? --Market'« Magazine. "I wonder at hint. In fact, I really I don't see how he could have done it," said he, looking at Sue, and slowly! H(roking his mustache. i She drew herself up with a great as- ! sumption of dignity. "If you will try, sir, you will find how j ,it can be done," said she loftily. ; "And if I-don't want to try ?" J • " Then the other puppy must make i 'you. Here he is, just in time. Here, \ Holla, good dog; bite at him, sir!" : And Sue clapped her white hands to- j getlier, and tried to whistle, as she had j seen her papa do, to the great amuse- ment of the gentleman. j But, instead of gallantly rushing to I the attack at command of his mistress, • Rolla frisked up to the stranger with ! extravagant demonstrations of delight. I "O he knows you," said Sue, con- j | temptuously, "and so you didn't run." j "Yes; Rolla knows his friends. In | fact, he's my namesake--an honor con Meanwhile, Sue and her compwrion leisurely crossed the orchard and the lawn. " Now, m introduoe you to papa," she said. "Only I don't know your name." ( "Oil, perhaps he knows it, and will introduce me to you. Meantime, call me anything you like." So Sue walked straight up to her father, and, putting her hand on his shoulder, said: "Papa, I've had an awful fright I was chased by a raging mad bull, and my puppy away from me, and an­ other with the very same name, saved me; so Tve brought him home with me," nodding in an introductory manner to­ ward the guest. WHAT IS A GENTLEMAN! Ammrnmm. Hw 1 »*««• Qurtltoa. It is almost a definition of a gentle­ man to say he is one who never inflicts j pain. This description is both refined, i and as far as it goes, accurate. He is j mainly occupied iu merely removing the I obstacles which hinder the free and nn- ! embarrassed action of those al>out him ; : and he concurs with their movements ! rather than takes the initiative himself, j His benefits may be considered as paral- ! lei to what are called comforts or con- I veniences in arrangements of a personal I nature ; like an easy chair or a good fire, 1 which do their part in dispelling cold j and fatigue, though nature provides \ make a respectable wheat win for one I shall own." Years passed and James Lick erected in Santa Clara county, Cal., a mill, the wood-work of which is solid mahogany. Shortly after its erec­ tion he had photographs taken of the inside and outside of his mill, and sent them to the miller who had refused him the hand of his daughter. Eh ?" said papa, looking up; and j means of rest and animal heat without catching the expression of the two faces before him, he fell into the humor, and, as he rose, said, with a wave of his hand toward the waiting tea-table, " Very ferred upon me by the admiring par- well, my dear, we'll feed him." tialitv of farmer Hawes.' "He belongs to me now, and I meau to change his name," said Sue posi­ tively. "Pray don't. You have no idea how musically it sounded across the field. I fancied some wood nvmph--or---dryard ] passed off agrwablv, So Mr. Roland Hanley sat down to the table with the family, and with an utter absence of that unpleasant restraint which Mrs. Mellington had remarked in his intercourse with Miss Radstoek; and, despite her vexation at Sue, the meal AIT IMPUDENT PUPPY. "Where is Sue?" inquired Mrs. Mel­ lington, entering the room where her two eldest daughters were employed, the one in reading, the other with a bit of fancy work. " I really don't know, mamma," an­ swered Ada, hx)king np from her work. " I have had scarcely a glimpse of Sue ttince we Came to the country. She ap­ pears to have taken to an outdoor life, and is never in the house except at night.** " I saw her about two hours ago on her way to the orchard," remarked Rose. " She said she was going to feed the pigs, and would afterward take a lesson in milking." " I wish I could find her,"'resumed Mrs. Mellington. " I am sure that Col. Hanley or his son will call this afternoon, and it is proper that Sue should be pres­ ent She did not appear on their former visit.** "She will shock the Colonel by her hoydenish manners, and, as to his son, I hardly think he will particularly admire her. He doesn't fancy female society, I've heart!, and prefers his dogs and horses. And wasn't he a little wild at college, manuun^?" "A little t<x> fond of wlisit is called fun --nothing more that I have ever heard. He is a clever young man, will be wealthy, and is, next to his father, the best match in the neighborhood, though, as you s«*y, he don't appear to care par­ ticularly for ladies' society. I fancy he looked rather bored while talking to that stately Miss Radstoek, clever and hand­ some as she is. And then he must know that all the girls are trying to secure him, which naturally makes him shv of them." These remarks were clearly intended as hints to her daughters, for Mrs. Mil, lingtou was a genuine match-maker, and had already married off two daughters advantageously. Finding that the remaining eldest daughter had failed to make the doeired Impression *>n either Col. Hanley f)t hia "Ion, she had bethought herself of pro­ ducing Sue, hitherto, as the youngest and prettiest, carefully kept in the back­ ground. But, meanwhile, where Was Sue? She had filled a basket with apples for flie pigs, strolled around the orcliard, ad­ mired the trees and the fruit, and climbed a low plum tree, in order to gather an especially fine one for her father. In this position her eye was caught by a loW line of green willows, bordering the sloping meadows beyond the orchard. "It looks as though a stream were there," she thought, "and I do so love water. I dare say it is so lovely under those willows. Come Rolla," calling to a little half-groWn terrier, " you and I will go on an exploring expedition together. " Rolla, after coaxing, rather sulkily •beyed. He was an ugly little, crooked- legged, hairy-muzzled pup, which Sue Itad, on her arrival at the farm, begged •f the fanner for a pet. Yet Rolla, despite all the petting, did not take to this pretty young mistress, but |>ersi»ted Hi evincing a decided preference for the barn and kitchen, and low life in general. She was not disappointed in her expecta­ tion. She found a clear, shallow stream, which ran rippling and murmuring £leasantly beneath the willows, between licketof wild rose and blossoming elder. She seated herself on tho grassy bank, took off firHt her hat and then her shoes and stockings, and allowed the cool rip­ ples to dance about her white feet. Then she became interested in watching some Insect. life on the surface of the water, and when satisfied with this, resumed her shoes and stockings and lay back on the «ool turf, dreamily reciting snatches of poetry. A stray sunbeam glinted on her rip­ pling brown hair, and the eyes that looked up tlirougli the waving foliage were as deeply Mue and clear as the snmmer sky overhead. Pity that there was no stray artist to gaze upon the picture. Suddenly Sue awoke to the fact that Bolla had disappeared, He had been anelling abont the bushes, and had now stolen off on the track of some scent, per­ ceptible only to his own keen olfactories. Sue lifted up her voice, and called in ker sweet, clear, girlish tones: "Rolla? Rolla!" In answer there -was presently a rustl­ ing timid the elder bushes, and forth stepped not the culprit Rolla, but a very . handsome young man, equipped with a gun and game-hag. Sue sprung up. Each stared for an nstant at the other; then the gentleman, gracefully lifting his hat, said: v " May I inquire, Miss, what you want with me?" " Want with you ?" responded she, in surprise. " Yee; I was crossing the field yonder, wlieu I heard you call me," he replied, with a slightly demure expression about his mouth and eyes. " I called you ?" said Sue, indignant- V "Yes; you called 'Rolla,' very dis­ tinctly and earnestly," replied he, biting the corner of his mustache, " and I, of •ourse, obeyed the summons, and am at your service. My name is Holland, or Bolla, AS I am familiarly called." Sue surveyed him from head to foot "Oh," said she, coolly, "it was a mis­ take on your part It was not you, but fee other puppy, I was calling. His same is also Rolla." "Indeed! where is he?" inquiredJte gentleman, looking around with a gnjft •«xpm«ion of interest " He has run away from me," --was calling to me. Belongs to you now. does he? Happy dog!" And he stopped and patted RoUa's head. She turned sharply. "Are you going away sir, or shall II" she demanded. "Oh, I would not for the world in­ commode you! And I beg you to re­ member that I came only because I fan­ cied you were calling me, having prob­ ably seen me passing. I saw you from the bank above. Pray excuse the mis­ take, and allow me to wish you a good evening." And with a courteous bow, he disap­ peared among the bushes. She stood looking indignantly after him until he disappeared. "The impudent puppy!" she murmur­ ed; "I never heard oi such assurance." And then a slow smile rippled over her face which she remorselessly biting the corner "Come, Rolla, dued voice, "come, sir, and go home; and see how you get into scrapes again." She climbed the bank into the meadow, the, dog followed with a subdned and culprit-like mien. But suddenly he gave a short, sharp bark, and at the same moment another and stronger sound smote upon Sue's ear. It was a low, hoarse, sobbing murmur, which seemed to swell into an angry roar. "If I were in Africa, I should fancy that a lion's roar!" thought Sue, curious­ ly looking around. In an instant her cheek became deadly pale, and she stood breathless and trans- j fixed, as a huge animal, with lowered i head, and eyes gleaming through shaggy ! forelocks, emerged from a thicket at some distance, and came slowly toward her, tearing up the earth with hoots and horns. Rolla, after a burst of obstreperous barking, turned and ignominiously fled. She strove in vain to follow his exam­ ple. Her limbs felt paralyzed, and she turned faint and sick. The bull came slowly onward, now Of course this was not Mr. Hanley's last visit to the Millington's--of course there were frequent calls, with walks and rides, in all of which lie fuh filled his ja-omiso of taking care of Sue; and when, at length, he asked the priv­ ilege of taking care of her through life, she did not say way. Lately, when Mr. Hanley wa.s lx>asting that his wife had accepted him on their ! very first iuterview, by referring hiiji to j papa, Sue looked around and said: " You were an impudent puppy that | day, Rolla, as you tire stilL" I A Romantic Incident. Oac of the most striking incidents that | «rer occurred in my experience here was j at one time that I had prepared l>o\es of i fancy paper with a fancy initial, or pet I name embossed in it, and put this up at j a dollar a box aud advertised it widely, j One d-iy I had an order from California ' irom a Miss Susie --. ; The box was done up, addressed to ! her and lay al»out here, when a young j Englishman came in and wanted to j write a letter. I gave him the materials j and a pluee, when his eye caught the ad- ; dress on the box. "Have von the order that came for : that inix of paper?" he asked. i "Yes," I replied, "it is about here ; somewhere." j "Would .you mind sending it up to my i hotel ? If it is what I think, I shall , leave for California to-iright. i I found it and sent it around, and . heard no more about it for perhaps three 1 months^ when one day the young man, : with a lady on his arm, walked in. , "Mr. Loriug, I want to present you j to my wife," he said. "We could not. I leave this country till we had thanked j you for your part in bringing us to- | gether." ' The denouement was quite a romance. He is never mean or little in his disputes, ! *VaS 8011 ,of never takes unfair advantage, never mis- I ' rWr „f I£? ,5° them. The true gentleman in like man­ ner carefully avoids whatever may cause a jar or a jolt in the minds of those with whom he is cast; all clashing of opinion, or confusion of feeling, all restraint, or suspicion, or gloom, or resentment ;'liis great concern being to make everyone at their ease and at home. He lias his eyes on all his company; he is tender to­ ward the bashful, gentle toward the dis­ tant, and merciful to the absurd ; he | guards agaiust the unseasonable allusions or topics which may irritate ; he is sel­ dom prominent in conversation, and never wearisome. He makes light'of fa- [ vors while he does them, and seems to I be reviving when he is conferring. He j never speaks of himself except when | compelled, never defends himself by a j mere retort; he has no ears for slaiider | or gossip, is scrupulous in imputing m ? ! tives to those who interefere with him, j and interprets everything for the best. Care of the Eyes. The most serious trouble with read­ ers and writers is, as might be predicted from their peculiar work, weak eyes. We find that engravers, watch-makers and all others who use their eyes con­ stantly in their work take extra care to takes personalities or sharp sayings, or arguments, or insinuates evil wluoli he dare not say out From a long sighted prudence, he observes the maxim of the ancient sage, that we should conduct ourselves toward our enemy as if he were one day to be our friend. He has daughter of the gardener. But love I levels all distinctions, and the young j man felt the girl to be the chosen' com­ panion of his life. To break off the at-' i taehment, his father had sent him to the j continent, and dispatched the gardener j and his pretty daughter to America, where the youncr man had followed ie rem°rselesslv checked by J preserve them by getting the best pos- ner of her under hp. | sible light by dav and using the best ar- fL® olf?' I. ! tifloial UKht rtt "'Pht. The great army """ " "" of readers and writers are careless, and most of them, swuer or later, pay the penalty l>v being forced to give up night work entirely--some to give up reading, except at short intervals, under the best conditions, and now and then one loses the eyesight entirely after it is too late, to take warning. Greek, German, short­ hand, or any other characters differing from the plain Roman type, make a double danger; The custom is to laugh at all warnings till p;un or weakness makes attention imperative, and then it is often too late to avert the mischief. Few comprehend the vast number we flippantly call a million, but it takes a million letters to make np a fair-sized volume of 500 pages, forty lines to the page, fifty letters to the line. A reader makes an easy day of reading this, but his eves must go over a thousand thou­ sand letters ! We can do no better ser­ vice to readers and writers thau to call attention to this great danger of failing to take the l>est of care, which is none too good, for the eves. Every tyro knows that he should have the best lowering his head, then uplifting it, and j light for reading, should shun carefully too much good sense to be affronted at j ; U n.ian j'ml followed insults, ana is too well emploved to re- in-* ° then address, and at member iniuries. He is f„r. I I™1 fi»duiS through the chance, of the meml*er injuries. He is patient, for bearing, and resigned on philosophic^ principles. He submits to pain because it is inevitable ; to bereavement, Ixvause it is irreparable ; to death, because it is his destiny. If he engages in contro­ versy of any kind, his disciplined intel­ lect preserves him from the blundering discourtesy of better, perhaps, but less educated minds, who, like blunt weapons, tear and hack, instead of cutting clean, who mistake the point in argument, box of paper.--/ntervu ic with Loring, JioxtoH J'ubUHhrr. - A'Bodie Snake Story. G >ovge Finney, driver of the Virginia and Bodie stage, says that snakes of several sjieeies, including hoops and rat­ tlers, are getting to l>e so plentiful along the road at his end of the route that it is dangerous to leave Jhe coach, and it is a great wonder he hasn't lost his team he- staring fiercely and threateningly at the figure in the center of the field. Suddenly a voice shouted: " Don't be afraid ! Throw away your red shawl! Now run--run to the nearest fence--while I keep him off!" The assurance of help at hand in- , r'ed her. She tore off the light zephyr j tint as easiest for the eyes, wl, which had attracted the attention pers, inks that show little ( of the bull, and ran as fast early dawn or twilight, should always assent; he honors the ministers of reli- waste their strength on trifles, miscon- i h>re this. In coming iu the other day ceive their adversary, and leave the 1 question more involved thau they find it. He may l>e right or wlrong in liis opinion, but he is too clear headed to be unjust; he is as simple as he is forcible, and as brief as he is decisive. Nowhere shall we find greater candor, considerat ion, in­ dulgence. He throws himself into the mind of his opponents, he accounts for their mistakes, he knows the weakness of human reason as well as its strength, its province and its limits. If he be an unlveliever, he will be too profound and large minded to ridicule religion or to act against it ; lie is too wise to be a dog­ matist or fanatic in his infidelity. He respeets piety and devotion ; he even supports institutions as venerable, beau­ tiful, and useful, to which he does not i as hertrem* bung limbs would carry her. How she got over the fence she never knew. Indeed, she knew nothing dis­ tinctly until the gentleman she had characterized as an " impudent puppy," lightly leaping the fence, threw himself, rather breathlessly and heated, on the ground near where she had sunk the moment she had found herself in safety. "Oh,"said Sue, half sobbing, "lam so glad you came ! That awfid creature would have killed me ?" "I fortunately heard him l>ellowing, and, remembering you, cajtne just in time to keep lrini off. " Weren't you afraid ?" stop at the first signs of pain or weari­ ness, etc. Most know that the glare front a plain, white surface is very try­ ing, and that the eye is relieved by a tint- Recent experiments in Germany are reported to indicate some yellowish Dark pa- color on first writing, faint lead-pencil marks that can l>e read only by straining the eyes, are fruitful sources of mischief. So is bad writing. The bad pnper, ink and pen­ cils most of our readers will have too good sense to use. The intelligent pub­ lic should so clearly show its disgust at the fine type, solid matter, poor paper and poor printing which some publish­ ers and most periodicals, except the best, are guilty of offering, that no pub­ lisher would dare attempt the experi­ ment a second time. The modern news­ paper, which so many read in the cars and by gaslight, is* one of the most fruitful causes of poor eyesight. We can­ not coutrol this at once, but owe it as gion, and it contents him tov decline its mysteries without assailing or denounc­ ing them. He is a friend of religious toleration, and that, not only because his philosophy has taught him to look on all forms of faith with an impartial eye, but also from the gentleness of feel­ ing which is the attendant on civiliza­ tion. """ "• • ^ •' A Rf Biinl>rcnfi of 1874. [From the Jack«on Patriot.] In 1874, Ih". Jacob Meyer, Saint Louis Mich., gave the following opinion: The Hamburg Drops deserve lo be recommend. e<i. I have prescribed thein for irregular­ is s of the liver, disorders of the stomach and diseases originating from these disturb, ant es, and have observed the most satisfac­ tory results. The Drops also cure consti­ pation in a short time. "Oh, no! I used when a boy to bait | a duty to protest stoutly against such these animals for my own amusement. But you see I can IK1 of more use to you than ' the other puppy.' Where is lie ?" "Gone. Deserted me in my hour of need," she replied, smiling faintly, as she dried her tears. "But I've* had enough of him. I'll give him away and printed matter, and, if possible, to re­ fuse to buy or tolerate it in any form more than absolutely necessary. Print­ ed matter ought to be leaded. A size smaller tyi>e with this extra space be­ tween the lines is easier to read than the size larger set without it. As the leaded get a lietter and bigger dog to accompany f smaller size will contain fully as much * * ' matter to a given space, there is no rea­ son why publishers should not adopt it, because it is quite as cheap.--Literary Journal. me on my walks, if they are to be as dangerous as tliis one." "Am I big enough?" inquired the gentleman. "I'll take the best care of you." "O, I don't know you yet, you see. I will ask papa," she answered demurely. "Certainly--by all means ask papa!" said he eagerly. "I'm going home now," she said, rising. "Won't you j»crmit me to see you safe? There may be more cattle around, to say nothing of snakes and owls." "Well, I think you may tome, though wo are near home now. I can see papa sitting on the verandah, reading; and there in the orcliard i^ my basket of ap­ plies, which I gathered for the pigs. If you won't mind. I'll feed them now, and carry the basket back." " I'll enjoy it of nil things." he asserted. Lifting the basket he c;u*ried it for her ! to the stv<>. where -»he amused herself • with tossing the fruit, one by one, to the i eager, pusliang crowd within. | "Soyou take an interest in those poetic j animals ?" remarked her companion, as ! he stood curiously looking on. "I feel sorry for them, they are so ugly and dirty. Nature wins to have treated them unjustly, poor tlungs, in making them so inferior to other animals. How They Capture Hyenas. ! The following mode of tying hyenas in | I their dens, as practi -ed in Afghanistan, I is given by Arthur Connolly in his Over- j ' land Journal, in the words of an Afghan I I chief, the Shirkaree Syud Daoud : j I " When you have tracked the beast to 1 his den, you take a rope with two slip- ' ! knots upon it in your right hand, and, ; j with your left holding a felt cloak before I I you, you go boldly but quietly in. The J j animal does not know the nature of the danger, aiul therefore retires to the back ! j of his den, but you may always tell j where his head is by the glare of his i I eyes. You keep on moving gradually | | toward him on your knees, and when j you are within distance throw the cloak i over his head, close with him, and take j i care he does not free himself. The beast | j is so frightened that he cowers back, | j and, though he may bite the felt, he can j | not turn his neck round to hurt you; so j • you quietly feel for his forelegs, slip the j ( knots over them, and then, with one i strong pull, draw them tight up to the i , back of his neck and tie them there, j The l>east is now your own, and you can j do what you like with him. We gener- Rliymcs of Animals. A correspondent Of the Cincinnati Gazette writes: I strung the following lines together to tickle the ears of my little boys, 4 and 6 years old. They tease their mamma to read it over and over again, and they fetch the big illus­ trated dictionary to have her point out the animals with such strange names, and tell what she can about them. This fancy for rhyme and rhythm is, I sup­ pose, a characteristic of nearly all dul- dren, aud perlinps the publication of this will amuse a wider circle than my little household. The aim has been, after eu­ phony/ to have the most incongruous an­ imals in juxtaposition : Alligator, Beetle, Porcupine Whale, lioUilink. l'antlier, Dragonfly, Snail, Crocodile, Monkey, Buffalo, Hare, Dromedary, Leopard, Mudturtlc, Bear, Elephant. Badger, Pelican, Ox, Flvmgtihli, lU iiuleer, Anaeenda. Fox, Guineapi^', Dolptiiu, Antelope, Goose, Hummingbird, Weasel, Pickerel, Moose, Ibex, lthmoceroH, OWL Kangaroo, Jackal, Opownni. IViad, GiK.-katoo, Kingfisher, JVa«xk, Anteater, Bat, Lizard, Ichneumon, Honeybee, Hat, Mockingbird, Cauiel, Gratwhopix-r, Mouse, Nightingale, Spider, Cuttletisli, Grouse, Ocelot, PheaKant, Wolverine, Auk, Periwinkle, Ermine, Katydid, Ha>vk, yuail. Hippopotamus, Armadillo, Moth, Kattletnake, lion. Woodpecker. Sloth, Salamander, Goldlineh, Angleworm, Do" Tiger, Flamingo, Scorpion, Fnjjj, UnicorD. Ostrich, Nantihw, Mole, Viper, Gorilla, Bat*ili»k, Sole, Wliippoorwill, Beaver, Centipede, Fawn Yautho, Canary, Polliwog, Swan, ' Y-eli.nvhaiuiner, Eagle, Hyena, Lark, Zebra. Chameleon, ButUufiy, Shark. [From the Detroit Wct-teru Home Journal.] St. JACOUS OIL is an excellent medicine. Have u>ed it iu enr household with ^real 'jenclit. he drove in a lot of snakes that literally covered the road for abotit 500 yards. He couldn't turn but, so he sent the silk into the horses and dashed through on a dead run. How the team escaped injury puzzled liim. One big lioopsuake, about ten feet long, that was lying in the eentre of the road, as soon as it heard the coach eomijig, uncoiled itself jnst. as the team was passing over it and made a vicious strike with its spiked, lwny tail at the belly of the nighwheeler, but missed him and struck the pole. The force of the blow was so great that the tail was driven into the hard wood some three inches. The snake, being unable to withdraw it, was dragged along for alxmt 100 yards until it was killed by one of the wheelers steppiug on it and breaking oft' the spike. The venomous reptile gave a frightful yell, denoting pain mingled with rage, as it expired, and before reaching the next station the wagon pole was swelled np as big as an ordinary sawlog, while poison was drip­ ping out from under the irons at each end like green sap from a freshly-cut salping. ---Jiodic Standaj d-Ueuw. t A Hupp) Restoration. I c^ii truly say that I owe my present exist­ ence and liappy restoration to the hopes and joyn of lite to the une of Warner's Safe Kidney and Liver Cure, aud I nay to every one nutTering from any manner of kidney,' liver or urinary trouble, " Uae thin remedy and recover.'" W. E. SANFOliD. Bolley, N. J*, 25, 1880. THE date of the earliest eclipse of the sun recorded in the annals of the Clii- nese, when "on the first day of the last month of autumn the sun aud moon did not meet harmoniously in Fang," or in that part of the heavens defined by two stars in the constellation of the Scorpion, has been determined by Prof. Von Op- poiser, of Vienna, to have been - the morning of Oct. 22, 2137 B. 0. Shall We Meet Again t The following is one of the most brill­ iant paragraphs ever written by the la­ mented George D. Prentice : " The fiat of death is inexorable. There is no ap­ peal for relief from the great law which dooms us to dust. We flourish and fade as the leaves of the forest, and the flow­ ers that bloom, wither and fade in a day have no trailer hold upon life than the mightiest monarch that ever shook the earth with his footsteps. Generations of men will appear and disappear as the grass, and the multitude that throng the world to-day will disappear as foot­ steps on the shore. Men seldom think of the great event of death until the shadow falls across their own pathway, hiding from their eyes the faces of loved ones whose living smile was the sunlight of their existence. Death is the antag­ onist of life, and the thought of the tomb is the skeleton of all feasts. We do not want to go through the dark val­ ley, although the dark passage may lead to paradise; we do not want to go down into damp graves, even with Prin­ ces for bed-fellows. In the beautiful drama of 'Ion' the hope of immortality so eloquently uttered by the death-de- voted Greek, finds deep response in ev­ ery thoughtful soul. When about to yield his life a sacrifice to fate, his Clemacthe asks if they should meet again, to which he responds : I have asked that dreadful questiqn of the hills that look eternal--of the clear streams that flow forever--of stars among whose fields of azure my raised spirits have walked in glory. All are dumb. But, as I gaze upon thy living face, I feel that there is. something in love that mantles through its beauty that cannot wholly perish. We shall meet again, Clemanthe." " GOT any Kids 1" the census man said, To tue woman from over the Rhine ; She hit him a belt on the side of the head--and excitedly answered^: Du hoelilsehes, unvercnaems ausgedortes muster einer froehen liarren, verlass me in haus, oder ich maelie l>olognischer wurst aus deinem leeren kopfe mit eineu stein .' You t'iuk I vas a goat?"--Qui mi/ Mod­ ern Argo. * THE SWEAT GERMAN REMEDY FOR RHEDMATISI, NEURALGIA, SdATicA,. IU1BAM, BACKACHE, TOUT, SORENES8 OF THft CHEST, SORE THROAT, QUINST, SWBLLIIICHI SPRAINS, FROSTED FlfT A.TD •"4 "\ EARS, Btmigra AND scAXiDs, mnwjm TOOTH, EAR HEADACHE, 15D mown PUB KO Preparatiom 011 EARTH EQN&IA SR. JACOBS OIL M A UN» BOSK, SIMPLE (HEAP External Kemdy. A tmleitiUi but the comparatively triftinp outlay of SOCkhts, &M ewy OM Buffering with pain ca.n have vtveap and positive pro*?«f ttsaUlW. M&CCT10K9 M BUTRM UMC1CIS. Mltn Ml NNttSYS MiKUEiS M MCOtffe A. VOOELER & CO Baltimore, Mil.. V. S. i, CCC* week m row own town. Term* and OntSt vOOfM. Addraaa H. HAIXXTT A Co„ PortUad.ll*. Y KAR and •zpeaaa* to agents. Outfit Fra*. Address P. O. VlOJtKRY, Angoata, **•*•«» COUGH Perry Davis' Pain Killer 18 R KCOM N r.x »t:o By rJbflWfln*, by hy by JVur»'®i in Hosjiitatt, MV EVERYBODY. DAIM Vll 1 ro S isi'RECiJHEiw rHIR nlLLtlf Sore Th oat. Chill*, Diurfaca, D)mcniii>rf, <Traiiip*>, CM* a* and all Bowel (iioiiiplaiutk. PAIN KILLFR World (or Sick II l« THE BEST REM- I'lDY known to (lie Headache. Pain In the Back, Pain In the Side, HheuuiatlMtii and Neuralgia. VN(|i'miO>TBl,¥ THE Peat IVIadel J9p e-qtasl ha~*in$ been found. a» For Sale bjr all Medicine llealorws tC 4.. AQfl per day at bome. Samples worth $5 Im 9010 9a U Addreaa UTIKIOM 4 Co, Portland, Me. • flCn A MONTH ! Ag*wta WnatM I A.i fill ^ Baat-Selliiut Article* in the world - a n» fWWw ple./'r««. JAY BRONSON. Detroit, Mich. ft in «r<>M(rt'ven away. Send 3c. stamp • •• •• •('< r imrticulara. "The Mesaen- Vwter, Lawisburgb, Union Co., Pa. Tnrritoir given 1AGKOO.' BUGGIES But then, the little ones, with their pink i UQ,ses and funny eves, do look BO chubby | !U1> ,uu"\ "lose we C and innocent " ; kraal, and hunt them on the plain with She tossed some apples to the little ; ones, and looked thoii^htfixllv. Why a Woman Cannot Shoot Htiaigrhi. A tramp gave a woman living in the ally take those we catch home to the ! ™kurbs of Galveston some impudence. "They remind me ol" :i picture I saw lately--Ciree, SUIT, muled by a herd of swine, into which .^he lnvd transformed her admirers, mid would never have im­ agined how much e'Npiv^sioii there was in the way that they wri^gltd and fvvov^l<Nl f i,, .r »', '• " 1 see that picture liow, at least some­ thing like it," the gentleman remarked, looking from Sue to the pigs. And again Sue repeated to herself, "What an impudent puppy!" as she dropped more apples into the stye. And this was the spectacle which greeted the horrified gaze of Mrs. Mel­ lington as she stepped on the veranda where her husband was reading, and looked across the lawn to the orchard. The tea table "was ready, and she was expecting Sue. " Mercyon me !" 6lie gasped. "Why, Mr. Millington, only look! There is actually Sue with CoL Hanley's son feed­ ing the pies. Mr. Mellington chuckled. "Well, my dear, I donl seo the harm of it, if they like it. Thongh where she could have picked him np I can't im­ agine." bridles in their mouths, that our dogs may be taught not to fear the brutes when they meet them wild." Hyenas are also taken alive by the Arabs by a very similar method, except that a wooden gag is used instead of a felt cloak. The similarity in the mode So nlie rushed in aud came out with shot-gun. She did not see the tramp at first, but he rushed out into the street in plain view, and told her to shoot, which she did, and missed him, of course. He went up the street smiling, and remarked to his confederate : "That was a close call. If si ie had fired without seeincr of capture in two such distant countries ! where I was, she would have plugged j as are Algeria aud Afghanistan, and by j certain, but as soon as she drawed | two races so different, is remarkable, j down on me I felt that my time hadn't j Prom the fact that the Afghans consider | come yet I ve been there five times that the feat requires great presence of | bt^ore. mind, and no instance being given of a j It is singulai that it is impossible for j • • 'a woman to fire off a gun without shut- I ting her eyes and turning her head j away. --Galveston News. j A Lover's Revenge. When James Lick was a young man man having died of a bite received in a clumsy attempt, we may infer that the Afghan hyena is more powerful or more ferocious than his African congener. The Dying Year. " My dear," said a sentimental maiden to her lover, "of what do these au­ tumnal tints, this glowing baldrick of the sky, this blazing garniture of the dying year, remind you?" "Pancakes!" he fell in love with a miller's daughter in Pennsylvania. Young Lick faced the stern old miller and asked for the hand of his daughter. Now, ,James was a _ f poor young man, l ut honest and indus- lie promptly answered. And then she i trious, and withal full of pride. The FOK Consamptives. Delicate Females, Nur«- ing Mot hern, Sickly Children, iirnl the i)e! ilit.v of Afie, Malt IlitterH, prepared br the Mall Bittern Company, are the purest mid richest uouruliing agent iu foods or inedu-ine cv<u compounded. NEAR Deadwood a bull leisurely en­ tered a house, probably to get away from the tlies. The woman fled ip ter­ ror and summoned several men, who found the bull in the bedroom quietly chewing his cud, and so well satisfied with his surroundings that it was neces­ sary to twist his tail until it kinked be­ fore he would vacate the premises. Wonderful Effect*. E.JR. Dawlev, of Providence. It. I., nays : " Having witnessed the wonderful effect* of Ilunt'b lteniedy in luy own cu^e, mid in a j;reat mnnlicr of others, 1 recommend it to all other* afflicted with Kidney Diseases. Tlione afflicted hy disease Khould secure the medicine \vi i.-h will cure, in shortest lxmsibk time. Hunt's Remedy will do this." 'lYial MZC. 75 centc. Arc You Xot in f>eod Health > If the Liver in the source of your trouble, you 1 can find an ai solate remedy ih DR. KAXFORD'R LIVKI! JwiiioitAToR, the only vegetable cathartic which acts directly on the I aver. Cures all Bilious diseases. For Book address DR. SAS- FOBD. 162 Broadway, New York. DR. C. E. HHOEMAKF.R, the well-known aural surgeon of Reading. Pa., offers to send by mail, free of charge, a valuable little book on deafness and diseases of the ear--especially on running ear and catarrh, and tlieir proper treatment-- giving references and testimonials that will satisfy the most skeptical Address M abort. S'lie Voltaic Belt Co., nanhalj, HUcki \ViI! scud their Electro-Voltaio Belts to the af- lictod upon thirty days' trial See their adver­ tisement in this paper, headed, "On Thirty Diiys' Trial/] VF.OETINK v.i'L regulato tho bowels to healthy action, by stimulating the secretions, cleansing mid purifying the blood of poisonous humors, and, in a healthful and natural manner, ex­ pel* all impuritios without weakening the body. AMUSE t he children with the Puzzle Cards. See advertisement in another column of this paper. ALL respectable dealers sell Frazer axle gre se because it is the genuine and gives per­ fect satisfaction." ^ WHO does not know that H. B. Bryant's Chi­ cago Business College stands at the head of the business colleges of the country ? ^ _ . READ the Puzzle Card advertisement in an­ other column of this paper. W'ILHOFT'S Fever and Ague Tonic. This old reliable remedy now sells at one dollar. PUZZLE CARDS, new and novel. See adver­ tisement in another column. THE habit of running over boots and shoes corrected with Lyon's Patent Heel Stiffenexs. for the TRAPE. ElfTKRPRISK (-AKR1. Cincinnati, O. C'ltalogM FRKfi' 1 flo TVTTTSTP O"" ' price*. Nflnd furot-XvV/ ill. w Oil; alogue o w iiiectw. vocal and in­ strumental. Uirjje sheet*. WH1TTKT, <91 6th Ave., N.V. Alfi s wffk. ®12 * day at taom» easily made. Costly 9 i £. Outfit Iree Ajltliets l'»PK & Co., Augusta, lis Mail us a l*<w(«l with yonr ad It will |>,%y you. A. t JOKTON " Co.,Ml Commerce8t.,Phiiu.,Pa Book Agents,! SEND 1V» write at CMS Sot hi paiMst- $ 7 7 7 s AGENTS WANTED flWlkBlV • ̂ 9 J».?s MHMiernln Extraordinary Offer! STANDARD BOOKS. A MU M A K IK, On our ln> FAMI1.T aproT Htfe and othur fast-sellii Aildri'Rs 1M Weill riAk »(., CMelasaU.Qhls. DAN 1 Kk R BKATT V>8 ORGANS! 14 8TOM, NUB.BASN Sr OCT. COVPUW. LI-ONLY $65 Hf»l on Trial* Warranted. Catalogue Free. Address DANIEL. F. BEAIIV, Washington, New Jersey. Showing Portraits of the Candidates for Pre«t<teat and Vlt* rrckldrnt. N«w and novel. A set of fowseot by wail for tltit r ii«cst nliintw. Address «-Jk-K D 1) Kl'OT, HO Fifth A**., Chlcaga. Ul. NATRONA'S8 b the bwt in the World. It to shaotateiy pare. U is lbs best, lor Medicinal Purposes. It is th® tost for B-tiil| •ad all Family Uses. Sohi by all DraggtBti and Groom PEIM'a Salt Manniact'lns Co., Piila. 20 (Vnti for one month** trabscriiition to the liroat Illustrated Story Paper, Tlie \\ «»rkiy i :il(. liiUa N. Y. I.*Htir»*r. AD«M*SN T. U. MORIIOW. IVIA 157 Dearborn Learn Tetoffrnphj am. earn HMO u> > KIO a KradtiatR guaranteed a payiiu; aitu* 1 4I.IST1SK, Manager, JaneovUle,Wis. YOUNG MEN a north. Every milnatp m tion. Addiess R. V >F THE Atai IheiiistAS STOnV PArth xxr W i and fl AlTKll-igwtt namilnn to sau oir (Not by sample, to families. We give attractive presents iirst-oiasg goods to your eustomet?; we give you good •rofltsjjrs prepay all express obarxss; «• rurnlata ouUlt nsa. Writ* (or partioularB. PEOPLE'S TEA CO., Box M95, St. Louis, IU. 20 YEAR'S USE |ip-vedonr C«>lcbruUHl No. MO Naples Ktrtugs to be the most duraMi?, produce the fiatrifc quality of tunc nud at o tbe whitest.most .'uutiful uu'l tratisr>ar<Mjt strings in the orld. Bet players an.l £W*t arti«t9 so ihcm exclusively. Introduction lily, firap!** nrrine 25 otn. Poll wt for ujiin for Banjo 90 eta. for Quitar I.ft), mailed prepaid. Money refDndtd ' un-»ati«fseiory. LYON & U£ALY, 152 »ute Street, Chloac^ X0> A0EXTS wishhic to canvass for the Livstsf GARFIELD! HANCOCK Should write at once for Circulars and tanas of agency ts roUhBBE A McMAKIN,OinotawatLO. FOR PE¥IP CHILL8 AND OAUSKB BV Malarial Poisoning OPTHE BLOOD. A Warranted Cart. Price. $1.00. BT ro* IUI •* ui. iMimim J| , A MUSICAL WONDER tkctii i« Mtoirrrt ViA •!«, ksi|Kt, tuitr ef «t« u| 6J1 yea? falara et evil the Lin* «l ©iii cfea r i«r. Hess* S^te « es I Do yots want a perfect Mum«^al InfftromeDt, rinfiof the piano and organ, upon which at yuu cap pay. form as i^rfectly as any professor upon the instrucMkls mentioned ? Then sand tornur iliudtraUni c the jrrvatest musical inventir.n of the rl'hr Uc> chun csil whioh r*ny rn tn. w^Hnaii or child can play correct'y all tho popular, classic, opw- atic, «tcifd, dance and other music. Amuse yourself, your family and y^ur trl^iida *90.00% i?&00 and «126.00. 1*V0214 HKALY; Stili mil it«mroe Chicago. BEFORE BUFIN& OR RENTING AN Send {or our LATKST II I.I'KTHATFD (.'ATALOUVB (33 pp. .Ito). with NEWK6T (iTVi.EB, at #51 and upward: or #6 38/)'r quar/fT. atvl up. Srnt,r'r<e. MASON A HAM­ LIN ORiiAN CO , IMTiemont. St . BOSTON; M Kaat Uih 8t„ NEW YORK ; 149 Wabasb Ave., ('HK'AOO. ON 30 DAYS' TRIAL, W© will aend oar Kloctxo-Voltnic Baita and olhfi (Cleetrlo Appliances upon trial for 30 d y* to thoa# ifflicted with A« ipf I t atur0. Paral; THE ONLY MEDICINE That Acts at tbo game Time oa THE LIVER, CIDN THE BOWEI and the KIDNEYS. Debility and realized, for the first time, that two hearts did not boat as one. PREVENTION excels care every time. Always keep Dr. Bull's Cough Syrup couvenient; take it in time and you will be free from Coughs, Colds, etc. Sold everywhere. Pnce 25 cents a ~b«ttle. ' _ man refused to grant James' re \uest, and advised him not to marry until he had a competency to support a wife. Those remarks were rather humiliating to young Lick's pride, and pith empha­ sis he replied : " Sir, I shall see the day wh<m your blasted mill would not Banktrn, Wlvrt Mri Mstfcn* DR. MARCH ISPS UTERINE CATHOLIt 'OJF WO positively cur© Female W eakm'S . su- b &- r ailing or thn Womb, Whites, Chronic lntlammalion o Licer tiou! of the Womb, Incidental Hemon or I loodin«, PainfuL Suppr»*Bse 1 and Irregular Menstrtiatiun. Ac AYI oiss reJia le remedy. Send i osial card or a prnnphlft, with treatment, cure- nnd ce. titic i es from phnicians ana patients, to HOWAHTH A BAD AUD, wiXGi, Y. Soid bjr all Drucgists--$1.SU per bottis. . . ' </ a *>**• Also of the JAfi-T, K'dntys. Kh.'umaUsm. rr tm«ra Urd »r HO pfllf. leit Co., Ilimkull, Hleh. BANS INSTRUMENT CAT ALOOXTS. ^ ,,/GO Cap*, Hcjta, POUCIM?*. K S;J- pons. Pram M:.:.-ftnd KpPUir-'P, ('BJ - Lamp*, S:&nd«, and Out­ fits eouUina 86 pa***# of irtfortnntiM* fflf wtiwetuJM. MaiUd Ad Ires* iVX A" EEALY, SUW bl., Ut IF TG01BE SOFFEEIKG From CATARRH 0TJ 1 information of a Sure Cure." Thousands of . have been cared in the List ten years bj his plan. cfh«M (rrrat orpins ar« tlio natural rleaae- . fri of Ui« evstuiu. If l hoy work welt, health ".ill bo pcrfcct: If thoy become clo® druautul diseaaos aro turo to follow \ RED RIVER VALLEY 2,000,000 Acres Wheat Lands beet 1b tho WoHdlj for mi© by th* St. Paul, liuiiGiiplis & Hauitotia R.B.CO. Thna doUais k^si- mem aliow«4 the tattler for b««stb k| and oltlTaitoa. For particulars apply to D. A. McKINLAY. InA CwuUssisaer. kt, rani. na» TERRIBLE SUFFtRINO. BilioaaacM, Het<Mk«, Dyapepaia, Jnn> 41oe, Constipatloa aa<l riles, or KM> •if CompUiuta, Crai«I, DUlntii, S«dliaMt In tlM Vk lae, Hilk]r « Ecpj VHM| M BKea« ' aiatte Pains iwl Ackta, are dsrelop"J beoanra tbo b:iwd Is |*tfaeee< i.u'1 t'ltj \urr.ori tuat should 'oat* naiurinliy. KiDNEY-WORT will Tfstcra the H«".l'HY JH'U'OH svA A;! thesa Joswov:t 3 ev.ls will.M fciiriviiol; oeslcct tix-tn £:ul *M'.i nil: >•> b-'tt to lu-.Tcr. TboosariUs BSocactiiwU. Tryitanayoj will add ono riore to th« aumlwr. la^e It and health wtllonce J Why suffer Ions®rftotn the torment ofanaoMngback? _ _ Why bear MMh dMiw» f*»o«*Co«*- etipatton awdPHga ? Why be so ftsarful beeewe m* ordered urine ? •_ KiDssr-'Worr wUl cure yee. "T agd at onc« and be satisfied. It U a drf i<sa« r»ckas«"i«kw'* <iaart»©f3l«iletee, I Your Drttwi* * «r * ** I XB£S, * C9., ftvtote* ORO. > te thim »m»fr

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