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K?IPMN|IP IPEMEKW. ILLINOIS. *teXA*r cATTue MR JDAQURN MUXBH. other SANS*.,..... BR&SRSY RSSG" i he sleep*. t To learn what he night know of lore, j" 35U"', ' ; Behold this day, au storm at morn, . , "" Vaow Ut changed to cltmd and sun. , all tMags cfcange--*to« -heart, tbp head; _d on earth there 18 not one ! *t chanireth nO\t!" T saia. , - i , p I idhad He drew a glass, as if to stswn The plain for 8teer8;.raised i l«i» > J9e craned hie neck, this cattle man, p|#"*v Then drone the oork home and repl **For twenty yean (forgive These tears t • P» twenty year# no word of strife-- .,1. f have not known for twenty yeau |>? One lolly from my wife." , ; "t looked that Texan in the fac?-- , J *1 ' That daxk-browed. bes*rted cstlf* tn#R. t SenaUed ids beard; then dropped in place >Jp 'r & oroad rieht hand, all scarred-and tin, !>And toyed with something shining mere i Prom oat his holster, keen and xiuulU. ... iU $ was convinced. I did not care J •* To Ngae it at all. . , >• *-* . Stat rest I could not. Know 1 rrrtirt The glory of my Texan guide; « dauntless love, enduring triasti ? His blessed, immortal briae. **i ; wondered.^narveled, marveled mi f! ft"." Was she of Texas growth? Was •£•' „ HDf Saxon blood, that boasted such J Eternal constancy? "M could not rest until I knew-- ' i . "Now twenty years, my man.*aa!fl1, ; "*Is a lonsr time. He turned and drew y ' , A pistol forth, also a sigh. 4 , r v.m *Tis twenty years or more," said he. <• Is "Nay, nay, my honest man, I vow -v^- ' • I do not doubt that this may be; But tell, oh! tell me how. • • -**Twould make a poem true and arand; All time should note it near and far; s $vKu»d thy 'air, .virgin, Texan land ^ Should stand out like a winter star, > • • America should heed. And then ,W> ' ,•* The-donbttul French beyoiul the sea--• .. ^Twonld make them truer, nobler men To know how this may be." iv's twenty years or more," uroed he, "̂Nay, that I know, pcod guide of mine; vnt lead me where this wife may b?, Atod I a pilsrim at a shrine. And kneeling as a pilsrrim true"-- > He scowling shouted in my earf, , . "*I cannot show my wife to you; , . 7 She's dead this twenty year.* ' $: r M W: Till NARK TWAIN'S CANNIBAL MEAL. . - The Sing of Easter island, in the frtdfic ocean, and myself, were dining together,, and lie was giving me the jJMrtk^dars of feasting in that region. *Tja the Sandwich islands and the Marquesas, they make poi oat of taro- *oot, only. The native takes the taro- voot, which is much like what you describe a turnip to be, and wraps it in plantain leaves, and puts it in the ground, which he has lined with hot •tones, don't you see?--covers it up, ' i t *MI ea ibsert this dish. It is, par, ex< national dish--no luau without it. A lu»u is *,gr«A4 friend--that is what it meafca. "As I was <Myii«,ih*Kanakas ex- perimented a good deal « mis­ sionaries, in the interest 6f scienob. and the experiments were gdneMuly fatal, though I urged them not t6 waste the missionaries, for we oo^ld not know when we would have another lot. Bui among those that survived was Wil­ liams, and it was lie that sent home those damaging reports to yonr coun­ trymen when he spoke of the treatment of his brethren in a peevish, fault-find* ing spirit, ill-becommg to his sacred rtflllincr " . ? light able. it roast. He takes it out, pounds it iu a great stone dish with a large le; adds water to this mush, from le to time, to thin it. He sets it .-•way (it is poi now) in large calabashes. It looks like so much flour paste. At meals all the family and friends sit -Around the calabash on their haunches --except that the poor common Kana- of course. Ah, no, my IwSatd--because you see me, the great lUng, in shirt-collar and spectacles, you 'gtust not imagine that the common sub­ jects must ape grandeur and put on -clothes. • • "They sit around the calabash, and eat from it with their hands. Each rts his fingers and stirs them ""briskly around until a. portion of the wilpy mass adheres to them--then tilts Mck his head, lets the suspended tail •f pulp descend into his open mouth-- •"then his fingem follow, and he sucks the remainder from them. Now, if the i be thiek, you can use one finger; if be thinner you must use two, or three, or four fingers, accordingly. An Inspired girl invented the method of 'flhickening four-finger with bread-fruit --and also the flavoring it with car- «eesse& of the delicious bird which in ^JTOur tongue you term grasshoppers." , . "Blessed girl!" .^Blessed girl, indeed! But pardon - Jpe--you--you seem distressed." "It is nothing. Poi, even in its native **stines8, is only mildly delicious to me • *-*-tlie addition to it <of the wild game mention --n ^ 'Ah, say no more. I perceive. But "•ry this dish. It is a fry. of bananas plantains, with oranges sliced in it, s*nd just a spoonful or so of the delight- ifol chirimoya added to give it tone. I v conceived the idea of adding the angle- ^ worms." | "It wfm inspiration.". iL BO reSard It i8 so considered W g]feat chiefs. To the common | lierd it is tabu, that- is to say, pro- v ^Mbited. Now, as regards missionaries," k -continued the King, reflectively sera ch- ^ng his head with the forklhadpre- •ented to him, and which he had al- *® dv learned to nse a great deal, "•hough not always in a strictly-legiti- aaate way, "as regards missionaries, I '^11 say that their landing here was un- -«tpected, but I hastened to give them ««rery protection, and I gave tliem full privilege to teach. They were the first whites that some of my people had seen, and of course these simple natives " fcad a natural curiosity to experiment Upon them. I could not reasonably •deny them this little gratification, gh I counseled them to practice as i cruelty upon the strangers as was >atible with a fair desire for in- JBeginafcion and the necessity for whole- *ama» amusement. They removod John- tmpn'a: eftrs, and that was a thing which I regretted seriously, until it was ex­ plained to toe that a* gteat chiefs little >«hild desired them to play with; and, if . 5<>n could have seen how much more •contented and restful the poor thing • Was after it acquired them, you would ,*"*ve felt how blessed a thing it was to able to contribute to the happiness -«f even a little child." ^ *as the impulse of a generous • K , *ieart it was a spirit of liberality as ^if?i>JKare as it is beautifuL And how did i ji ifr°"naon Kk® it ?" "f- "Oh, Johnson said it was the will of *^3od. It was like Johnson to say that, - But thfe missionaries were right well ^Wrted, on the whole. The natives **teied various interesting experiments ,t vl^on them, such as scorching them and iaa^pihg thew, and all that sort of / thing, and I killed one of them, mvself, ^ s l|lot i* malice, but because I had a'curi- |i>«8 caprice to see how he would go r *iUi onions. He was a failure. Old u*nd tough. Give me pungency and ,tenderness for a combination. Onions V «nd infancy is my idea of comfort. But ^M'ufcere comes a dish oalling. "It was pitiful in that Williams, aftei all you had done for his party." I should say sou But never mind, let's be cheerful, anywav. How ar« you making out ? Let me help you to a fried plantain. Take some more o: the pup. Not ? Try some of the hu­ man charm! You'll like him. He was a Frenchman, a splendid chap--young and hearty, beautiful to look upon. t)< you prefer white meat of dark? Le: me help you to some of the breast. AK me, I have known this youngster for thirteen years--fished with him, sailed with liim, swam with him, gavA a couple of my sisters and four aunts to him. 11 loved' him. He was always good. He is good now." q Taking up a fragment of his late brother-in-law the King took a bite, and then gazed long and pensively on the remainder, until by-and-by the muscles of his mouth began to twitch with emo­ tion, and presently two or three great tears welled from his eyes and coursed down his cheeks. Then, in a choking voice, he murmured: "Alas, they have fried him." I laid down the breast-bone of the deceased and burst into tears also. Such is the sympathetic power of grief. It was nothing to me whether they fried him or broiled him; it was nothing to me how this poor foreigner was cooked; I was only eating him out of vain curi­ osity, and not because I loved him, not because I respected him, not because I wished to curry favor with his relatives. Yet I wept. "They hove fried him," said the King. "Alas, poor Gautier. However, let ua cheer up, let us be content.. But I will have my co6k for bredkfast for this-- and I will fry him and see how he likes it. There is nothing like a sharp ex­ ample to teach a man, my friend. But don't be idle, sir--take some more erf the fried Frenchman. I ought to be ashamed to offer you such a dish, but you see how I am situated. He ought to have been baked--this fellow ought. We always bake a Frenchman--we never think of frying him. But I wish you had known this fellow--so kind, so gentle, so loving, and yott See yourself how tender he is. But that Williams business--I wish you would straighten that up for me when you go to America. . , •wwa-rttttrting pens and peper for elate and slate^penoils. Fatrir may be fipened by the electric but it is said that it is unpalat- Strawberries grown in this way, toder the direction of Prof. Siemens, were* worthless. Some melons ripened *werft of such poor quality that to render them eatable, they would need to be strongly flavored with condiments. A MIM ING engineer accounts for the greater frequency of dust explosions now than formerly, by the far greater number of quick-moving machines now used in flour-mills, each of these caus­ ing a corresponding diffusion of flour- dust, and thus tending to produce an explosive mixture of the inflammable dust with the necessary atmospheric air. . A SMALL reservoir charged with liquid carbonic acid is used in the Ber­ lin fire-engines to make steam liefer the fire is well under way. At the Krupp works, it has been recently stated, liquid carbonic acid is utilized, not only in the manufacture of com pressed steel, but for production of ice and of seltzer water; also to give the pressure necessary for delivery of beer. 1)008, rabbits and Guinea pigs were kept by M. Poineare in an atmosphere resembling that which is usually breathed by persons who use petro­ leum. The Guinea pigs alone suc­ cumbed after remaining from one to two years in this medium. The othfer animals appeared to resist indefinitely. He nevertheless recommends persons employing petroleum as a source of heat or light, or who treat it industri ously, to keep their stock in closed vessels, to attend to ventilation, and to execute operations of rectification, etc., under draught hoods. CAREFUL and apparently unpre­ judiced investigation by a committee of medical men has shown that the free use of alcoholic beverages causes a four­ fold increase in death from diseases of the liver; two-fold increase from kid­ ney diseases; a marked increase in deaths by pneumonia and pleurisy, and Df diseases of the brain and spinal cord; but a decrease in "mortality by bron­ chitis, asthma, consumption and lung congestion. Then there are also deaths directly attributable to drunkenness or chronio alcoholism and resulting from accidents during drunkenness.--Dr. Foote's Health Monthly. Do NOT empty the boiler nnder teams pressure, but cool it down with the water in it; then open the blow-out tap and let the water pour out. To quicken the cooling the damper may be left open and the steam "Slovin oft' through the safety-valves. Do\ot, on any ac­ count, dash cold water^on any of the plates. But in cases of e: ,iergency pour T. - . ~ , ,, j cold water in before the hot water islet If your people could only know the , out, and mix the two together so as to facts m the case, they would not blame Cool the boiler me. It is a little hard, after I have spent all these years in building a good name, to have it all knocked in the head by t.lna shabby adventurer. Now, what he called a 'hideous revel,' and a 'feast of demons,' and all sorts of vile and wicked names, was nothing in the world, I give you my sacred honor, but a simple bocue--seventeen old crippled natives --no account under the sun, just an.-eat-, pense to the community, and I fricas­ seed them to give a little treat to some visiting town chiefs (Aldermen you call them in your country), who were here for a day Or two from Wonga Island. 'Feast of demons,' indeed! Feast of dried-up, skinny old rapscallions that the island is a thousand times better ofl without, and I am sure it was honorable in us to be hospitable to those strangers. Though, between you and me, it was an awful swindle on them. Tough? Oh, don't mention it. More cholera morbus and indigestion and general suffering among those chiefs, you never saw the like of it in your li*e. Now, Twain, you see what truth there was in Williams' statements--all that row about nothing. You can set this thing right in your country--you can do it easy; simply just explain the facts--and anything I can do for you 111 do it--you may de­ pend on me. Send me a copy of vour weekly. I can't read it* but a iittle literature can't hurt a man anyhow. Caesar's ghost!" "Oh, heave?, what if^ftmatter, your Gracious majesty T* "Oh, misery; Oh, murder; Oh, des­ peration." "Oh, what u it,your Imperial Majesty ? I beseech you." He had sprung to hi#. and his fixed eyes were staring wildly at the fried meat before him. "Oh, my brain reels. This hair is not a Frenchman's hair. There must be some lhistake. A horrid suspicion bursts upon me. Ah, what is this I see ?--this thing ?--this accursing mark ? A. strawberry mark on the left arm?-- it is, it in, toy long-lost brother!" Alas, it was even so. It was his long- lost brother--what was left of him. Poor, poor fellow; he was fit only to be shoveled into a basket and given to the poor now. ThejKing fell to the floor insensible. He grew worse and worse, and the next day his removal to the country was ordered. Many sympathiz­ ing relatives and friends followed the palanquin in and did what they could to alleviate the sufferings of their un­ happy sovereign. It turned out afterward that the sweetheart of the Frenchman had made a surreptitious exchange of marneting in the King's kitchen before daylight on that fatal day. She had bought the King's brother from a wandering tribe that belonged to the great wilderness at the other end of the island. She bought him purposely to make that ex­ change, though, of course, she did not know who he was. The Frenchman escaped from the island in a canoe that very night. I would have liked to taste that Frenchman. 1 "• which you will 1il»> ggy pood liaole--baked dog and yams!. it- your teeth in this direction and TMMJP this slice from the contrivance ••4? *wrhich you call a fork. A man, if he be of an excise. M bound to like • . ' " - V?1/ i : ;,;5 •' Inland's Original Tongue; The report of the Society for the Preservation of the Irish Language states that at the commencement of the present century probably not more than 400 persons could read and write Irish, whereas fliis society alone has disposed of over 62,000 elementary Irish books. The number of persons in Ireland who speak the old language is nearly 950,- 000, as against nearly 818,000 in 1871, although the population has, during that period, diminished in round num­ bers 252,000 persons. This, as pointed out, is nearly equal to the Welsh people speaking Welch. "Not only," it is ob­ served "has Leinster increased its num­ ber of Irish-speaking inhabitants, but Dublin has made a considerable ad­ vance in this respect, partly fulfilling the old Irish prophecy." WE seldom find people long ae we are in a condition "to tl.em service.--Kochefoucauld. down gradually and generally, and not suddenly and locally. If a boiler is blown off under steam pressure the plates and brick-work are left hot. The hot plates harden the scale, and the hot brick-work hurts the boiler. Cold water dashed on to hot plates will cause severe straining by local contraction, sometimes sufficient to fracture the seams. A STRONG alloy which attaches itself so firmly to the surface tif metals, glass and porcelain that it can be employed to solder articles that will not bear a very high temperature, can be made as follows: Copper dust obtained by pre­ cipitation from a solution of the sul­ phate by means of zinc, is put in a cas! - iron or porcelain-lined mortar, and mixed with strong sulphuric acid, spe­ cific gravity, 1.85. From 20 to 30 or 36 parts of the copper are taken, accord­ ing to the hardness desired. To the cake formed of acid and copper, there is added, under constant stirri»g, 70 parts of mercury. When well-mixed, the amalgam is carefully rinsed with warm water to remove all the acid, and then set aside to cool. In ten or twelve hours it is hard enough to scratch tin. If it is to be used now, it must lie heated so hot that when worked over and brayed in an iron mortar, it becomes as soft as wax. In this ductile form it can be spread out on any surface, to which it adheres with great tenacity when it gets cold and hard. Rice and Beans. Half the people of the world live al­ most exclusively on rice. It contains 88 per cent, of nutriment, while roast beef contains but 26. There are countries where the almost exclusive diet of the masses is beans; these contain 87 per cent, of nutriment. The best and cheapest food lor the dense populations of Asiatic countries, therefore, is rice;, and since, from the general poverty of the people, varieties of food are out of the question, bounte­ ous nature has given them more freely that kind which is among the most nu­ tritious of all foods. With the rest of the world, rice is more of a side-ilish, and is served most frequently in the form of pudding. We venture to affirm that when the cost, the percentage of nutriment and the wholesomeness of beans are con­ sidered, there is not iu the world a sin­ gle article of food that can compare with them. There is no other Vegetable food that answers so well as a substi­ tute for meats. While they have so much to recommend them in other re­ spects, they have no rival in economy. A quart of beans, costing 10 cents, will furnish a family of five persons with food for a day. Much of the value of beans as food depends on the manner of cooking. It would be difficult to cook them too much. They should he first boiled until soft, and then put into a baking dish and baked until they are brown. A little salt pork or butter, but not enough to make them taste greasy, Bhould be put in the baking pan, and cooked with them. If beans are not thoroughly cooked they are difficult of digestion; still there is not one hotel or restaurant in a thousand that serves them sufficiently cooked; and, as a rule, it is not well to call for them in such places; but at home, when prepared under the supervision of a good cook, they make a dish that is wholesome and palatable: -- HalVs Journal Health. of American Tea. Mr. H. "W. L. Lewis, formerly Master of the Mississippi State Grange, finds tea-raising profitable. A gentleman who visited hi** placc writes* "His tGft slirul>8 grow luxuriantly. Two plants throw out side branches enough to covei space of ten or twelve feet square. They are loaded with green leaves. He can pick the leaves four times in one seas without serious injury to the plants. The first pickings make the best tea. Mr. Lewis from two plants can make enough tea to supply his family a year, I By wilting, rubbing and beating the , tea than of the g ̂ftean China. The verr t*as ium «ai4 to be kept in Ctt»*ai»<t «re not «eet to other countries, luunr people who never a tea-plant Mte ratlculed the former Commissioner of Agrioulture for at­ tempting to enoourage tea-culture in these States; but we have never yet been able to understand why good tea may not be made where the plant grows to such perfection, as it does in^tlie <3nlf States.*--^Chkfagb Times. ' f •••! . - I Malaprojiisms. No malapropisms are commoner than the often misused words "circumstance" and "incident," both being written in­ differently as signifying mere matters of fact. Whether a circumstance" is in any case an allowable expression may be doubted. Circumstances stand around; and any one thing that stands around, unless it be a ring-fence or a fog, is hardly conceivable as a possibil­ ity. But the gravity of the error lies in a distinction less captious. A quarrel or accident in the street is not a "cir­ cumstance;" but it may be explained or excused or accounted for by circum­ stances. A fire breaks out in a build­ ing and burns it to the ground. This is not an "incident," it is a fact. If anybody were to jump out of a window, while the fire was raging, that would be properly described as an incident. And, again, if the supply of water were to fail, if the turncock were slow or quick in coming, if the engines were early or late, any of these things would be cir­ cumstances, for they would surround the fact and modify its results. "Efflu­ vium," with its plural, is a noun often misapplied, and yet more frequently re­ stricted to one of its 'many applications. By "effluvia" is vulgarly meant evil odors, and, of course, an effluvium may be an outflow of foul air. But it may just as well be a stream of pure water. Many writers employ the adjective "sumptuary," as if it belonged exclu­ sively to dress, whereas it may relate to all matters of luxurious living; and if the old sumptuary laws should be re­ vived they might reach the epicures who waste their patrimony on pate de foie gran, opera boxes, horses, carri­ ages, jewels and rare wines, as well as the extravagant wearers of costly attire. "Decimate" is a verb which, with its adjective participle, "decimated," is lu- dicrotisly mistaken. Its original sig­ nificance was grave and often terrible; for it meant no less than taking the tenth of a man's substance, or shooting every tenth man in a mutinous reg­ iment, the victims being called out by lot. _ This appalling character of de- cimination lay in the likelihood that in­ nocent persons,, slain in Cold blood, might suffer for the guilty. But the peculiar horror vanishes when we alter the conditions; and a regiment which has taken part in a hard-fought battle and comes off the field only decimated, that is to say, with nine living and un­ scathed for each man left on the field, might be accounted rather fortunate than the reverse. We come now to holocaust," the use of which noun often l>etrays ignorance quite as gross. Thus the dreadful loss of life fcy the sinking of an excursion steamboat on the Thames was recently spoken of as a "holocaust," by which remarkable mis­ prision of etymology the Thames was set on lire indeed.--'MacMillari's Mag- azine. • • Diphtheria in the Milk Can, The dangers to which dweller* in towns and cities are sometimes exposed, in' consequence of the gross careless­ ness or ignorance of their country pro­ viders, is strikingly shown by a recent outbreak of go:mine diphtheria in Hen- don, England. Fifteen residents were violently attached the same day. On investigation it appeared that all of them had milk of the same dealer, and that there were no other cases of the disease in the town, excepting among these suppl ed from this dairy. On pi shing the inquiry further it was found, not that there was diphtheria in the family of the milkman, but only that the cans wea-e rinsed with water from a foul and dirty stream that ran by the house and yard; and a micro­ scopic examination of the water revealed the presence of living organisms, sup­ posed to be the cause of diphtheria in general. The person who could use such water for such a purpose, and call it washing milk cans, was responsible for all the suffering and danger thai came of it. This is said to be the first time, at least in England, that the dis­ ease has been directly and unmistaka­ bly traced to infection by milk, although there litis before been good reason to suspect it.--Nev York Tribune. She Was Faithful* Mrs. Cramsie wanted a cook. A edl- ored woman, named Malvina Strtmk, called on her. "Iso a fust-class washer an* iner, but I doesn't like to wuk at dat now, I'M mo' parsliul ter cookin'." "Well, it's a cook I want. I presume you can give references or bring testi­ monials tj show that you are faithful, a;:d not inclined to change about as most cooks do?" "Yes'm, Ise faithful fur a fae'. Is* had the same colored gemman visitin* me for mor'n six monfs, an' I've no 'spectation of changin', at leas' not till cotton-piekin' time. I've never been 'cused'ob not l>ein' faithful, an' I hab been married lots ob times."--Texas Sift ing a. The Other Fellow Builds the Home* A moon-lit evening is good for build­ ing houses. No money is required, only talk. Two young lovers discuss the future---after they are married. They sit down, with their arms around each other, and say they will build as soon as they are married and the season has advanced a little. They will have a two-story house with an attic. They Avill have a three-story house, perhaps. It shall have this or that number of rooms. This convenience or that con­ venience will make it much more de­ sirable than any other house. Hun­ dreds of little point? are discussed. The season advances. The season passes. No house built. The other fellow builds the house. LABOE quantities of beef are used to make beef tea in the London hospitals. The beef Ijeit after the tea is made is a stringy/ indigestible substance, and has, until recently, been sold at a low rate to feed pigs. But the Vicar of the village of High Roding, in Essex', writes to the (Juardian saying that the laborers in that district think it deli­ cious, and are anxious to obtain it. He has made arrangements to have the meat sent from the London hospitals to feed these poor creatures, who would otherwise scarcely ever taste meat. A PHILADELPHIA paper suggests: "If over-production makes a ~ ket, under- dull A itr » , tfon olf chromic times, by means of » camel's-hair pen­ cil, to be the most efficient and easy method of removing warts. The warts become black, and ultimately fall off. DR. REKLAM considers that headache and other consequences of sleeping in rooms containing flowers do not arise from any special properties of the flow­ ers themselves, but are due to a strain­ ing of the nerves of smell in the pres­ ence of perfumes for an unwonted length of time. The effect is ana'agous to that produced upon the eyes by an unusual exposure to light, or on ears by long-continued sounds. IN The World of Science a physician laments the too-frequent habit of drink­ ing strong tea and coffee after a hearty breakfast or dinner. For hard-work- ing persons, if they are not too oorpu- lent, he recommends thick-flake cocoa as a healthful and nutritious drink. "For those who do not want fattening drinks, and who cannot drink cocoa, I should say drink hot water at break­ fast. In cold weather warm water is by far the best drink at dinner and in hot weather a draught of warm water is more wholesome and cooling than cold or iced water."--Dr.Footed Health Monthly. THE use of the low bedsteads, with the trundle-bed, ignore a great and im­ portant principle, that relating to the fact that near and on the floor will be found, the most poisonous gases, the carbonic acid of the sleeping room, since this is heavier than the air, falling and flowing into lower parts of the house, like water. It is cruel enough to put the children in a room which is already occupied by a sufficient number of persons--two are enough^--without putting them at the time when they are growing, and need every possible far vorable condition, where they continu­ ally breath the worst air--all of it be­ ing filthy enough--malaria I--City and Country. As THE unpleasantness of the taste indicates, when in the extreme, ajpoison, so offensive odors reveal the germs of disease--poisons. These foul odors are in our sleeping rooms; remove the Causes, open the doors and windows, and let them become so diluted in the air as to be comparatively harmless, and at the same time utilized by sustaining vegetable growth. The air is such a diffusible element that all odors soon disappear, so that it is one of the most available means of purification. They are in the cellar; open the windows, after the offensive matters have been re­ moved, and let air circulate through. They are in the dark, damp rooms; let the all-penetrating sunlight in, con­ suming and dissipating the foul gases, producing motion. To breathe them is to invite disease.--Dr. J. H. Hana- ford. IT is now many years ago that the author, while engaged in some investi­ gations as to the qualities and effects of the alkalies in inflammation of the skin, etc., was fortunate enough to discover that a saline lotion, or saturated solu­ tion of the bicarbonated soda in either plain water or camphorated water, if applied speedily, or as soon as possible, to a burned or scalded part, was most effectual in relieving the acute burning pain; and when the burn was only su­ perficial . or not severe, removing all Eain in the course of a very short time; aving also the very great advantage of cleanliness, and, if applied at once, of preventing the usual consequences--a painful blistering of the skin, separa­ tion of the epidermis, and, perhaps, more or less of suppuration. For this purpose all that is necessary is to cut a piece of lint, or old soft rag, or even thick blotting-paper, of a size sufficient to cover the burned or scalded parts, and to keep it constantly well wet with the sodaic lotion so as to prevent its drying. By this means it usually hap­ pens that all pain ceases in from a quarter to half an hour, or even in tnuoh less time. When the part of the limb, such as the hand and forearm or the foot and leg, hps been burned, it is best, when practicable, to plunge the part at once into a jug or pail, or other convenient vessel, filled with the soda lotion, and keep it there until the pain gubsides; or the limb may be swathed 3r encircled with a surgeon's cotton bandage previously soaked in the satur­ ated solution, and kept constantly wet with it, the relief being usually imme­ diate, provided the solution be satur­ ated and cold. What is now sold as bicarbonate of soda is what I have com­ monly used and recommended, al­ though this is known to vary much in Duality, according to where it is manu­ factured ; but it will be found to answer the purpose, although probably How- ird's is most to be depended on, the fommon carbonate being too caustic, ft is believed that a large proportion of ttedical practitioners are still unaware Df the remarkabla qualities of this easily-applied remedy, which recom­ mends itself for obvious reasons.--F. Peppercome, in Popular Science Monthly. A Peculiarity of New Jersey* . a® "It is only in New Jersey," sftys^he Detroit Free Preen, "that the papers speak of a widow woman. All other States grant the sex without dispute." Yet New Jersey has good precedents for that form of speech. It follows the old Eastern fashion. It was«about 3,000 years ago that a woman of Tekoah came to King David, saying to herself: "I am, indeed, a widow woman, and mine husband is dead." Possibly, in Detroit, all widows are women whose husbands are dead, but down East there are girl widows whose husbands are not dead. The Bible tells us also of the "widow woman" in Zarephath who fed Elijah in the days of famine. Bible language seems more familiar to dwellers in New Jersey than to those in Detroit. But when Mr. George Wash­ ington Moon has his new Bible com­ pleted, that woman of Tekoah's state­ ment will be cut down to "I am a widow." , The World's Railways. „ Inhere are now in the world 258,000 miles of railways, distributed as fol­ lows : Miles. ...113,000 ,..109,000 ... 8,000 ... 7,000 ... 8,500 ... 3,200 ... X.200 ... 8,100 ...853,000 United States........ Europe Asia .....1.1. South Americs...;... Caiidaa. Australia Africa Mexico .......... In its first year, according to Geyelin, the hen produces only 15 or 20 eggs; in its second year 100 or more, up to 120; in its third year from 120 to 135, and here the climax of fertility is reached; in its fourth year it produc from 100 to 115; in its fifth from 60 to slowly JEsdas to its disappearance hi the ten&^tr of life.--Gaillard'# Mpdical These Did Not L<*« An Oregon youth, aged 19 loved his cousin and siaot himself through the heart after inscribing on a visiting card the words: "My Fannie, no man ever died for you." A market gardener in Hluiois hung him­ self because his corn was rotting in the ground. Another Illinois man shuffled off this mortal coil because he had lost his best boy and best cow, and didn't want to live any longer. A supersti­ tious merchant in New York cut his throat because a customer sent hiw a letter asking for the- latest quotations in looking glass. An extravagant wife of a poor Colorado doctor swallowed arsenic because her lenient father, who had supplied her with money for many years, had resolved to draw the string of his money-bag closer and not send her any more money, as he was de­ sirous of her becoming more economical in her ways. A Missouri father was overcome with shame on learning that his son had stolen a watch, and ended his woe by a dose of poison.. A New Jersey inventor devised a corn-husker, which was a failure be­ cause it only worked satisfactorily on large ears; therefore he suicided. A San Francisco hunchback left word be­ hind him that blood rushed to his head* which seemed to be shrinking through his shoulders, and that his bones were tangled one with another, rendering him wild with pain. The force of ex­ ample is often remarkable; a St. Louis shoemaker shot himself because he lived within a block of a shoemaker who sev­ ered his jugular vein, and this deed preyed on his mind. A sailor tied a rope about his neck and leaped over­ board; his body was towed into port before being discovered. A Vermont widow hung herself with a skein oj yarn. A_ Virginian made four attempt? to take his life, and finally committed suicide by shooting himself through the head with a shot-gun. The muzzle ol the weapon was placed against his right eye, and discharged by a string fastened to the trigger and tied around a toe of the right foot. A Pennsylvania wheel­ wright used a hatchet, a knife and a rope. With the hatchet he struck him­ self three times on the back of the head, with the knife he severed his windpipe^ but missed the jugular vein, and with the rope he strangled himself.. An Illi­ nois mechanic hung himself to a ladder in the bell-tower of a church, and was discovered by a frightened sexton. A Californian spread a blanket on the floor by the side of his bed, tied a small rope around his neck so as to draw through a loop, and tying the other end around the top of the bed-post, less than two feet above the floor, had lain down with his right arm under his head, and strangled to death. An Iowa farmer cut his wrists with a plane, and afterwards hung himself to a fence five feet high. The distance was so short that in order to produce death he was obliged to draw his knees up even with his eyes, and hold them there with his elbows. An old man of 80 years, living in Western New York, foretold the day of his death, and to fulfill his predic­ tion, cut his throat from ear to ear with a razor which he held in one hand, and which he had tied with a string so it could not move when doing the deed. A California powder-maker made his exit with giant-powder, and was blown to shreds.--Insurance Chronicle. s&T Mrs. Stowe «g a Novelist, -tl Mrs. Stowe was brofight up alriftist the "divinity" of New England, and was as much the product Is not honest tiM«ue h* is poor."* He is more liable to be < because he is honest. ONE of the laws of Hosw: 1 j Sell a sand per < cious!" "DE downfall ob a Uncle Mose, "is enjoyed by all . a© ter de same church.' hypocrite," crites demselves--ef <iey ioan b'Gng faculty as any divinity ' • " i of its clerical ty student. Both her associations ana her sympathies sent her to the front of the anti-slavery agitation; while her social advantages and her early migration to the West gave her an opportunity of studying our society in its widest range. Thus she had in her the Puritan in its loftiest reach--the New England clergyman. She was in the forefront of the broad­ est Puritanic movement--the anti- slavery reform. She developed amid the finest culture, and ripened in mind when the times were ripest for action. These were her opportunities. Her gifts from nature were of the Walter Scott pattern. Her mind was mascu­ line in its perception of humor, in its broad, healthy common sense. She ab­ sorbed, like Scott, everything that gets to the fullest expression of human ac­ tion--incident, gesture, dialect, feature, tone, inflection--both the peculiar an the general. She could generalize an individualize --- her individuals being both types and distinct personages-- warm, full-blooded, alive all over, and characteristic. She had such a large intellectual endowment that she could give a fair fund of mind to each of her creations; such a wealth of humor and bonhomie that she could warm the coldest blood; such a wide possibility of the sinner and saint ini her nature that she could endow a double-headed procession to march with Eva heaven­ ward, or with Legree in the other di­ rection. In "Uncle Tom's Cabin" she was lavish This book contains her- whole range of characters,, and every­ thing combined to make it her great work. "Dred" is but a sober variation on the anti-slavery theme ? "The Minis­ ter's Wooing" is. but a study in early New England life. "Uncle Tom's. Cabin" alone places her with Walter Scott. It is more intense and zacrally fierce than anything of So©it, and more- dramatic. The background, though not so historically full as. Scott's back­ grounds, is nearly as rieh. Except in the negro element, there is no distinct­ ly humorous character in its pages, but a sense of humor irradiates the whole, flashing from black Sam, or Phineas Fletcher, or Topsy, but more from the author's management of incident, and binding every person into the human family. Humor is the sunshine which warms everything into life.--The Cen­ tury. _______ It Cannot Be Dene. The Germantown Telegraph truth­ fully says that a young man who thinks he can lead a reckless and profligate existence until he reaches the middle term of life, and then repent and make a good, steady citizen, is deluded. ^ He thinks that people are fools, destitute of memory. He concludes that if he repents, everybody will forget that he was a dissipated fellow. This is not the case; people are apt to remember the bad deeds, and forget the good ones' Besides, it is no easy thing to break off in middle life bad nabita that have been formed in youth. THE Indians taught the white men the art of making maple sugar, but white men taught themselves hqw to adulterate it, , ̂ -- * - ' " * 1 * WHEN you write a political letter, i it contains a political secret, be and use violet ink, for tins the a will be kept inviolate. UNCLE REUBEN---"Yaw, Ephrim, yo should do as yo is done by." Eph "Yass, Uncle Beubeiv but hain't never been done by 1* SMASH, smash, smash, Oh, china, rich and Kay, " * '«• *or the pitcher will never be whole KM --J*u i* ^ Wa" 8naa8ked on moTigf A*f | A PINT of whisky put in a fruit will keep it for six months^ and the same amount put into a mim inll ke< him down until 2 o'clock in>the mer ing. A LAW prohibiting whistling m graveyard has been passed by the Pen sylvania Legislature, and now what is a man to do to keep up his courage and frighten away spooks in that State ? "My son," said an American father,, "how could you marry an Irish girl?" "Why, father, I'm not able to keep two* women. If I marrv a Yankee girl I'd have to hire an Irish girl to care- el her."--Household Hints. '"THE difference," said Twistem, re­ flectively, "between a young married couple and an old gentleman rabbit, appears to me to be just this: One's a happy pair and the other is a pappy' hare."--Pittsburgh Telegraph. WILLIE has a 4-year-old sister, Mary, who complained to mamma that her button shees were hurting her. "Why,. Mattie, you've put them on the wrong feet." Puzzled and ready to cry, she made answer: "What'll I do, mam­ ma? They're all the feet I've got."--- Harlem Times. A TEACHER defining a transitive verb • as one that expresses an action which is "passed over" from the doer, gave for illustration, "The dog wags his tail." Whereupon a youngster arose with the criticism: "Please, ma'am, the action don't pass over; it stays in the dog.-- Boston Transcript. HO A LADY WITH HER BACK TO I know thy face is fresh and bright, Thou angel-molded erirl, X caught one elimpse of angel white, I saw one auburn curl. Oh, would the whisperinsr ripples _/Ihe thoughts that vainly strive! She turns--she turns to look at me-- _ Black, cross-eyed, seventy-flvel --0. W. Holmes. '-.v.';/ - •? -V ;.v,rvv A POOR woman applied to a gentle­ man for alms, and when he put his hands in his pockets she exclaimed, "Ah, my good sir, I perceive you feel for us!" "Yes," replied the gentle­ man, "but my circumstances will not permit me to do more than that."-- Carl PretteVs Weekly. AN Austin man has been thinking seriously of running fQr Mayor of the city at the next election, but he has given up the idea, upward of sixty voters having said to him: ."cfi Colonel, if you only knew how much respect yow!" "What then?" "Well, then, you would say: ' Can't I lend you $5 ?'" On reflection, the Colonel nas come to the conclusion that he has serious doubts about being the man for so responsible an ol Texas Siftmgs. proper fflce.-- % TBIOLET&. Banana peel, • With upturne Waits for a heel So take a deal, | Dine one to feel' Its iron grip. I 9Bght-clothe8 young genl* •^Intent on mash, S peeling went, i feet were seat award firmament--An awful crash, Sight-clothes young a ' Swears bluish streal A garment rent, A'dollar spent, For ulster lent, • i r His home to ,,2 * scnooimasier --Philadelphia Press, THERE is a story of a who, on every available occasion, elo­ quently denounced cruelty to animals. One day, when out with his class botan­ izing, he saw at a distance one of his scholars catch a bird -and immediately let it go. Radiant with pride and de­ light atrthis proof of successful moral teaching, he pointed out the noble little lad's goodness to his school-fellows, and hurrying up to him patted him on the head and said: "So you restored the poor little captive to his native free­ dom, my dear little child?" "Yes, and so would you, too, if you'd been me,? returned the boy. "Look here where the littfle beggar stuck his beak into me." The Corn Crop far Twenty Years. The following figures show the an­ nual; production of wheat and corn off the United States for the past twenty y e a r s f f s f j • . ; • . Wheat, bushels. .... ..m,BTf,900 160,61*5,800 .... ..148,552,800 191,990,900 .... ..212,441,400 .224,036,600 Year. u ,V"; 1864.......... 1865.„ 1866..i....... 1867. B68........... 1869;. 260,146,900 235,884,700 230,722,«» 249,997,100 281,254,700 ...;. .309,103,700 ......292,136,000 289,:t56,500 364,194,100 420,122,400 448,756,630 498,549,MS 383,280,090 502,789,300 1870 1)871.. i«7a..... 1873.. 1874..:...... ....v.. 1875......... 1876 1877.......... 187 8 187 9 188 0 1881 1882 Average wheat. Average oorn to,. 397,880,200 • 630,451,400 704,427,800' 867,946,200 768,aj0,000 906,527,000' 874.320, (>0», 1,094,255,00l>< 991,898,000' I,092u719,p00i 932,274,000' 850,148,800' 1,Ml,069,000 1,388,827,000' 1,942,058,{>00 1,388,018,700 1,647,®01,7W l,7174M^ft 1,194,916,009 l,994,917,S0e The Dangers ef lee. It has been repeatedly pointed eat that ice is destroying the American race. The ice-water that is universally drunk by Americans who believe them­ selves to be temperate, ehflla the stomach, renders digestion impassible, and makes the consumer a napeless dyspeptic, even if it is not responsible --as many persons believe it to> be--for that almost exclusively-American mala* dy, Bright's disease of the kidneys. But there is another evil wrought by iee in this country, of which no notice has yet been taken. The practice of preserving food on ice is. rapidly demoralizing the American palate, and rendering us, as a nation, incapable of dining like civil­ ised beings. ~~New York Times. EXPERIMENTS in draining roads with tile, it is said, will solve the problem of securing good wagon roads for the Western prairies. . WE sometimes meet an original gen­ tleman, who, if manners had not astr*: . <'.v .. 1