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leader •cooUn\ B mtla^ i r! looks* Wlaay Jeetor, Bow easnlle, eii--"so en «a" 5^ BMaaeaail! Kow, don't gitlasy, _Kj anmn'en tar yo' shirt, fltompdem feet, but don't go crazy Skw samebody alio'git hart. tsMM Qm riof jpiO dii mnslct eettin' sorter i . tombstones m de night, .! I'olar'tograotonS; -- Med de like bete'; : lllgpere «bo'ly dance on'dwolaas ttdrin' dronthan' oberflo'. ; j Heb'nly Kingdom! look at *'*; Bofe eyes Bhinia" like de "Don't git w'arjf, don't K<t w*i Dat's de my to change da ol T*i Now, dat comes handjfc HuntiSr Seats en take a res*. Oentermene wtil psaa de ond| __ To dsgalsdey lore do ben*. " RATHER SMALL FOR HIM. • tlTAlOLEir HfTKTliSV.' <•' %y; dear," said Mr. Spoopendyke, as he surveyed himself in the glass, with a preternatnrally solemn countenance. *_My daar, how do yon think those clothes fit me?" "Splendidly!" emphasized Mrs. epoopendyfce, walking around him so as to tike in all the glories of his new garments. "If I hadn't seen you dressed for a funeral, I should say yon ought always to wear black?" "Think the crape on the hat is the right height for a pall-bearer?" asked Mr. Spoopendyke, shaking his hat on his head and regarding his wife with a steadfast eye, as though he expeoted to catch her in a lier" about the hat. "Just exactly right." replied Mrs. Spoopendyke. "And here are your black gloves." "Don't want any gloves," growled Mr. Spoopendyke, turning again to the glass. "How'rn I going to catch hold tight of those handles with a pair of gloves on?" "But you must wear gloves!" pro* tested Mrs. Spoopendyke. "All pall­ bearers wear gloves, and I want you to look as nice as the others. This is a real nice pair, and I bought them for Jou myself. Put them on, that's a ive P Mr. Spoopendyke yielded more to the argument than to the entreaty, and held opt his hand for the gloves. "jLre these mates ?" he asked, as he ttlrhei! them over and scrutinized them car'efully. "These things both go on the same hand. Where's the thumb of this off glove?" "They are all right," said Mrs. Spoo­ pendyke, smojth them out. "Now they sre all ready, and all you have got to do is to put them on." Mr. Spoopendyke jabbed his right fist into i fee glove and commenced to tag. "Where'* the steam derrick that goes with this ?" he demanded, stopping to eye his progress with some misgiv- M to his ultimate success. "When you get your hand in, you want to take it by the fingers and push ft on," suggested Mrs. Spogtendyke, rather inclined to think she iflglit have made a mistake and bought a size too small. "They'll slip on easy enough if you'll onlf have patience. Now try." "Then it wants a pile driver," grinned - Mr. Spoopendyke. "I had an* idea that a demck was the proper thing. That tile way you mean ?" and Mr. Spoopen­ dyke caught his fore fingers in an iron grip and bent them double. "Is that lone on, from your standpoint?" Are those ends sticking out there intended to represent anything particularly con­ nected with a funeral ? What's all this bare place down here for? Is that the - way the rest of those pall-bearers are going to look ?" and Mr. Spoopendyke pointed disdainfully at the fluttering fingers and his naked palm. "Perhaps the rest will paste the other glove over * this bare spot! Is that the way it works ?" V, "No, dear," murmured Mrs. Spoopen- tke, not exactly seeing her way clear, d wishing she had said nothing about the gloves. "I would give them a gen­ tle pull, now. Just see if they won't on that way." Mr. Spoopendyke caught a grip, and , hauled until he was red in the face, but the glove hung fire. Then he braced his foot against the side of the bureau and gave a tremendous wrench. "It is a good, strong glove, anyway," f mmented Mrs. Spoopendyke, who had en watching the experiment with an •ilixious interest. "What d'ye think I'm going to do?" . demanded Mr. Spoopendyke, tempor­ arily letting up on his performance. "What do yon think this is the funeral Of, a gymnasium ? Got any kind of no- , tion that I'm going to bury a circus ? Why didn't vou get some gloves more renowned for their going on a man's hand, and less for their durability? Strong, eh ?" roared Mr. Spoopendyke, going back to his avocation with re­ newed appetite. "Tliink they are pret­ ty strong, do you? Just you keep an ^eye on these iron-clads now, and yon •will get some new notions about strength!" Mr. Spoopendye bent all his energies on the gloves.ancl ripped it from the thumb knuckle to the wrist joint. "That tho way you mean it to go?" lie yelled, considerably dissatisfied with his Miocsss. "Think this style adds any­ thing funeral to my appearance? Is this the latest thing in pall-bearing?" "Never mind, dear," cooed Mrs. Spoopendyke. "I can take a few . stitches in it. and it will do for to-day." "What's the matter with it now?" howled • Mr. Spoopendyke, giving it another jerk that carried the tear around to the whole back of the hand. "What it wants is a few stitches taken eat of it, and the proprietor is going ligbtinto the business of getting them oat. How does that strike you?" and Mr. Spoopendyke, having pulled the disintegrated part over the wrist, stuck out the fingers for his wife's contempla­ tion with the air of a man who was Bet­ ting the fashions. "IH tell you what you can do," said lira. Spoopendyke. "You can wear the 1 carry this in your hand. No i will notice the tear, and I think the vl&goffiieangt. he howled. «d plam on the sifter hasflxedm* toooold to keep ! This style of far « dollar r and fee told np his hand and air. "Come onl" be »g«n. "You're the __ an.easy, and the other is th® o®e fin to cany ? Don't make any mistake hi your functions on so solemn *n occasion as this! Come on and be oaved!" and le $arked it over his thumb and then tore the thumb out. "Got any more gloves?" lie demanded of his shrinking wife. "Think I am going to bury a brother Mason with one thumb and a split hand? Got any kind of a notion that this is a tramp's funeral, and I am to go pall-bearing around m rags?" "Never mind, dear, maybe the rest won't wear gloves, and if they do, vou can s?y you forgot yours," said Mrs. dyke, soothingly. ant me to stand over that measly coffin and lie about it, don't you?" he squealed, as he saw that even his wife had given up the last hope of gloving him appropriately. "Want me to stand over the man's grave, and assure him that I'll bring along a pair of gloves when I die, perhaps!" "C&n't you stop and buy a pair as you go along?" asked Mr. Spoopen­ dyke, as the easiest solution she could think of. "That's it!" howled Mr. Spoopen­ dyke, to whom this idea had just oc- cured, and was righteously indignant- that his wife had thought of it too. "I can l«an out of the window and yell for the hearse to stop, while I go to market and fit myself out for the ceremony! It took you to capture the only means out of this difficulty, and as a' reward of merit, I'm going to fit you out with an ice-box and a brass band, and start an undertaker's establishment with you as soon as I get back from this pall-bear­ ing. You hear! With your ideas of a funeral, all you want is 'Hie Jacet' on your back, and a row with the other de­ nomination to be a first-class cemetery!" and Mr. Spoopendyke put on his hat hind side before, and started for the funeral, to find that while he was mak­ ing up his mind as to what improve­ ments his wife needed, the cavalcade had left, and another pall-bearer had been appointed in his place. "I don't care murmured Mrs. Spoopen­ dyke, as she picked up the torn gloves and inspected them with a view to mending them for her own use. I don't care. I suppose they will have gloves at the funeral for liim. They always do; and if they give him any, it will be a pair that will reach from the calf of his leg to his shoulder blade, and I wanted him to have a pair that would fit him nicely. Anyway, I can use these to go to market in during the winter," and Mrs. Spoopendyke put them away carefully, and sat down to the paper of two days before, to store her mind with useful knowledge on the freshest topics of the day,--Drak§s\ Travelers Magazine. Wealthiest States. . According to the census of 1880 the four States showing the highest assessed valuation of real estate and personal property are: New York, $2,651,940,- 006; Pennsylvania, $1,683,459,016; Mas­ sachusetts, $1.584,756,802; Ohio, $1,534,- 360,608. Assessed valuations are so far from being the true values of property, and there is such divergency in the practice of the various States--some as­ sessing at nearly the true value, others at scarcely 25 per cent, of it, and most of them at rates ranging between 40 per cent, and 50 per cent, of it--that there is no great amount of satisfaction in a comparison based on these valuations. For example, the total assessed valua­ tion of personal property for the State of New York is $1322,057,647, when it is generally believed that four men, Mr. Yandehbilt, Jay Gould, Russel Sage and Augustus Belmont, together, own very nearly this amount in bonds, mort­ gages and other personal property. As to the value of their* chief pro­ ducts, the States holding tliflhighest rank are as follows: ' In manufactures: Number of of States. establishments. products. New York 43,739 $i,080,ca6,w» Perinaylvanis 31,232 744,818,445 Massachusetts 1MM £31,135,284 Illinois 14,549 414,864,678 Ohio... 2U,tiM 348,298,390 In agriculture: Value of States. ^ \ jive stock. Illtnot* Jl32.437,7#2 New York........-.. M,S!»,3M Ohio 103.7ttT.730 Iowa 124.715,108 Pennsylvania.... .. 81,242,8T7 In mining: Value of product of Value of non- States*. precious metals, precious metals. Pennsylvania $55,590,576 Colorado 174 1,041,350 California 18,*>1,8M - Nevada 17,318.909 Michigan 25,858 H,r#3,437 Illinois! 8,911,279 Ohio 8,077,488 From the above it appears that in the aggregate' value of their agricultural, manufacturing and mining products, New York leads all the other States with <i total of over $1,381,000,000; Pennsylvania follows, with $1,024,000,- 000; Illinois marches third, with over $760,000,000: Massachusetts fourth, with over $676,000,000; and Ohio fifth, with nearly $617,000,000. -- Inter- Ocean. ^ On Colors. "I see Mrs. Shoddy is going to put on colors again," said Mm Crimsonbeak to her neighbor, Mrs. Yeast, while they were hanging out their washings in the back yard. % "It can't be," exclaimed Mrs. Yeast, dropping the clothes-pin from between her teeth. ' "But it is so," replied Mrs. C., mov­ ing nearer the Yeast reservation. "How long has her husband been dead V came from the other side of the fence. "Only three months next Saturday." "It is impossible that that Shoddy wo­ man would come out in colors so soon. But how did you hear of it?" "Well, I met her in Daub's store last week, and she was baying some of his Value of all farm products. $203,980,137 178,025,695 156,777,152 136.103,473 129,760,476 face Mint, and, would you believe it, Mrs. least, it was the same that oolor vou have bean using!" The feet thatttis. Yeast was unable to climb thefonee saved Mrs. Crimson- beak from total ambulation. F*ATO generally lights a --for Jtttitte* to get a lot* at it; and a corse's of tho erfe, this Mi Use tepid, slightly •twmner* njnirol of cold.r QKIAKaaheB are said to be an invalua­ blyremedy for the bites of mosquitoes ju^ottuar insects. Wet the ashes and tptllW on the affected part and the stibging sensation will be relieved al­ most immediately. The reason for this is that the ashes contain an alkali neutralizes the acid of the poison. DB. JOHN CHAPMAN, who has some­ thing of a hobby in the idea that ice ap­ plied to the spine is a good cure in many nervous affections, regards cholera as a nervous disease, and he has treated it by general application of warmth to the l>odv together with sim­ ultaneous application of cold by ice bags along the spine. He claims to have had unusual success by this method--Dr. Foote'is Health Monthly. CARE OF THE FKET.--When the feet are damp and cold it is impossible to keep well. There will be a cough or sore throat, hoarseness, sick heahache, or some other annoyance. If cold and dry, the feet should be soaked in hot water for ten minutes every night, and when wiped and dried, rub into them well, ten or fifteen drops of sweet oil; do this patiently with the hands, rubbing the oil into the soles of the feet partic­ ularly. On getting up in the morning, dip both feet at once into water as cohlj as the air in the room, half ankle deep for a minute in summer; half a minute or less in winter; rubbing one foot with the other, then wipe dry, and, if con­ venient, holding them to the fire, rub­ bing them with the hand until perfectly dry and warm in every part. If the feet are damp and cold, attend only to the morning washing, but at night al­ ways remove the stockings and hold the feet to the fire, rubbing them with the hands for fifteen minutes, and get immediately into bed. Under any circumstances, as often as the feet are cold enough to attract atten­ tion, draw off the stockings and hold them to the fire; if the feet are much inclined to dampness, put on a pair of dry stockings, leaving the damp ones before the fire to be ready for another change. Some persons' feet are more comfortable, even in winter, in cotton, others in woolen stockings. Each must be guided by his own feelings. Some­ times two pairs of thin stockings keep the feet warmer than one pair which is thicker than both. The thin pairs may be of the same or different materials, and that which is best next to the feet should be determined by the feelings of the person. Sometimes the feet are rendered more comfortable by basting half an inch thickness of curled hair on a piece of thick cloth, slipping this into the stocking, with the hair next to skin, to be removed at night, and be placed before the fire to be perfectly dried by morning. Persons who walk a great deal during the day should, on coming home at night, remove their shoes and stockings, hold the feet to the fire un­ til perfectly dry, put on a dry pair, and wear slippers for the rest of the even­ ing. Boots and gaiters keep the feet damp, unclean, and noisome by pre­ venting the escape of the insensible preparation and odor which are con­ stantly emanating from healthy feet; hence the old-fashioned is the best for health for the strengthening of the ankles, by habituating them to support themselves. Pieces of. newspaper wrapped around the feet over the stock­ ings keep the feet remarkably warm. Cold feet arise from the want of vigor­ ous circulation in them; this is often remedied by putting them in hot water in a wooden vessel, so as to cover the toes; in about ten minutes put both in cold water, the colder the better, of the same depth for half a minute; the ob­ ject being to produce a shock, calcu­ lated to draw the warm blood to the soles; this may be done on retiring and rising. Nothing should be considered a trouble which can even have a slight tendency to keep the feet warm, be­ cause there never can be recovery from disease or substantial good health with­ out it. Josh Billings on Good Old Days. How I dew long (once in a while) for them good old daze. Them daze when there was more fun in thirty cents than there is now in seven dollars and a half. Them daze when a man married 145 pounds of woman, and less than nine Smnds (awl told) of anything else ow I dew long for them old daze when educashun konsisted in what a man did well. Them daze when deakins were as austere as horse-red­ dish ; ministers preached to men's soles instead of their pockets. Them daze when polytvks was the exceptions and not the rule. Them daze when lap- dogs and wet-nurses wan't known, and when brown bred and baked goose made a good dinner . Them daze when a man who wan't bizzy was watched, and when wimmin spun only that kind of yarn that was good for the darning of stockings. How I dew long for them good old daze when now and then a gal baby was called Juru- slia, and a boy wan't split if he was named Jerrymier. And ye who have tried the fether and fuss of life, who have had the eddfish of wealth without sense stuck under your nose, cum be­ neath this tree and long for an hour with us for them good old daze when men were ashamed to be fools, and wimmin were afraid tew be flirts. A few years a«a, from harbor, tfaroat of passencets twanft for a foreirn shore. Bite never eatBvM port The mystery of her untimely end crows deeper as the yeats increase, and the Atlantic voyager, when the Jlaree winds howl avoua* and danger is imndasnteo era? hand, shud­ der* a« the name aod Miftef tfatt magnificent vessel are alhWsdto. Our reporter, on a rccertt vtsltto New York* took lunch with Capt. George Siddons Mur­ ray. on board the Alaska, of the Golan line, t ap. Murray is a man of stalwart build, well- knit frame, and cheery, g«nial disposition, be has been a constant' voyager for a quarter of a century, over half of that time ha.ing been in the Iraaft-Atisntic service. In the course of the conversation over the well-spread table, the mystery of the City of Bwtim was alluded to. "Yes," remarked the Captain. "I shall never forget the last night wo saw that ili- iated vefS 'l. I was chief oBoerof the Ctty of Antucrj'. On the day we aigthed the OBy of BokIou a furious southeast hurricane set in. Both vessels labored hard. The Bern seemed determined t "> sweep away every vestige of 11.e. When day ended the gale did not abate, and everything was lashed for a night or un­ usual fury. Our good ship was turned to tho south to avoid the possibility of icebergs. 1 he City uf Boxhti, however, undoubtedly went to the nort'a. Her boats, Hfe-preiervers ttsatWOhai ttemerdecer, i by the amairia. Vhe event was by nervous prostration, which ,_myB Senator Harris, of Albany, j which, growing *.. . ^ Sn 016 lMt ten years. Anally produced "blues' and periodical brain disorder*. He %a^a modsl husband, but dyspepsia made i ^ -n *VVi> The (iamc of Baccarat. " At Baccarat, half-a-dozen packs of cards are put before the banker. Not to enter into details, the game is this. *The banker takes two cards and gives two cards to the players; both banker and players have the right to draw one card. The winner is he whose cards approach the nearest to a certain value. As the banker may see the card drawn by the player before electing to take one or to remain with his original two, he has an advantage of about 5 per cent. Nothing is more easy than to cheat at this game. The banker may l>e, and, of course, often is, a profes­ sional swindler as well as an adept at sleight of hand. This latter talent is, however, not necessary. The table at which he sits is surrounded by a crowd, every one of whom can see the cards dealt to the players. One of them has only to make a sign to the banker in order to tell him what is the value of the players' cards, and thus to indicate to him whether he would do well to draw a card or not. That sane human beings should be induced to stake their money under such conditions is proof that human credulity is an inexhaustible fund. --London Truth. CaicKET-PiiATCTa is traced back to the fourteenth century, when it was in­ dulged in under the name of "cinb hpU." ^ and rar.'ts were all securely lashed; and when s'.e went down, everything went with her, never to reappear until the sea gives up its dead." "What, in your opinion, Captain, was the caufe of the lots of the City of BmtOnl" "The "i?H ttf Limerick, in aimost precisely the same latitude, a few days later, found the sea full of floating ice; and I have no -doubt the City of lUtsUm collided with the loe, and sunk immediately." Capt. Murray has been in, command of the Alatk* ever since she was put in commission and feels justly proud of his noble ship. Sac* carries thousands of paasaiigei-s every year, and has greatly popularized the Williams & Guion line. Remarking upon the bronzed and healthy appearanoe of the Captain, the reporter said that sea life did not seem to be a very great physical trial. "No? Bur a person's appearance is not always a trustworthy indication of his phys­ ical condition. For seven years I have been In many respects very much out of sorts with my sell. At certain times I was f o lams that It was difficult for me to move around. I could scarcely straighten up. I did not know what the trouble was, and though I per­ formed all my duties regularly and satistatu­ torily, yet I lelt that I might some day be overtaken with sume serious prostrating dis­ order. These troubles increased. I felt dull, and then, again, shooting pains through my arms and limbs. Possibly the next day I would feel flushed and unaeoountably un­ easy, and the day following chilly and de­ spondent. This continued until last Decem­ ber, when I was prostrated soon after leaving Qtio; nstown, and for the remainder of the voyage was a helpless, pitiful sufferer. In January last, a friend who made that voyage with me, wrote me a letter urging me to try a nev.- course of treatment. I gladly accept­ ed his counsel, and for the last seven months have given thorough and business-like attention to the recovery of my natural health; and to-day, I have the proud satisfac­ tion of saying to you that the lame back, the strange feelings, the sciatic rheumatism, which have so long pursued me, have entirely disappeared through the blood-purlfytng In* fluence of Warner's Safe Rheumatic Cure which entirely eradicated all rheumatie po son from my system. Indeed, to me. It seems that it has worked wonders, and I therefore most cordially commend it." , "And you have no trouble now In exposing yourself to the winds of the Atlantic)1" "Not the least. I am as sound as a bul­ let, and 1 feel specially thankful over the fact because I believe rheumatie and kidney dis­ ease is in the blood of my family. I was dreadfully sho&ed on my last arrival in Liv­ erpool to learn that my brother, who Is a wealthy Cfeina tea merchant, had suddenly died of Bright's disease of the kidneys, and consider myself extremely fortunate in hav­ ing taken my trouble in time and before any more serious offsets were possible." Hie conversation drifted to other topics, and, as the writer watched the face before him, BO strong In all its aatlfaios and yet so genial, and thoughkof taeinnuiherableex­ posures and hardships to which its owner had keen exposed, he Instinctively wished all who arc suffering from the terrible rheu­ matic troubles now so common might know of Capt. Murray's experience and the means by which he ksd been restored. Fain is a common thing in this world: but far too many endure It when they might Just as well avoid it. It is a false philosophy which teaches us to endure when we ean Just as readily avoid. So thought the hearty Captain of . the Alaska, BO thinks the writer, and so should all others think who desire happiness and a long life. A Sanguinary Pirate. "I recently heard that the engage­ ment bdMfcen you and Miss Pinfeather was broMn off," observed an Austin so­ ciety swell to a compatriot in the same line of business. "Aw, ya-as," replied the party ad­ dressed; "we meet as strangers now, and never speak as we pass by." "What is the cause .of the estrange­ ment?" "Why, don't chew knO|ir? Her is a pirate." 1* - " A p i r a t e I "Aw, ya-as." "Why, what are you talking about? Old Pinfeather is no pirate." "Why--aw--ya-as. He's a regular freebooter. That's the reason that I quit going to her house."--Tevas Sifting#. The Meadows of Xaryland« SPRINGFIELD, PRINCE GEORGE'SS MD.--Mr. Charles G. Addison, of thea; place, states : "I sprained my right causing intense suffering, and the ui crutches for several weeks. I found no re­ lief in other remedies, and finally tried the miracle of cure, St. Jacobs Oil. In a short time I conld bend my knee--which had been as stiff as an iron rod--laying aside my crutches, and was able to walk as well as ever." • The Het Water Cnre. Hot water as a curative agent seems to be having a "boom" now. Hot water internally, externally and eternally is the cry not alon.5 from the Aunt Betsies but from the regular, gilt-edged, full- fledged profession. Dr. G. It. Shep­ herd says he has used it for six years in cases of inflammation of the throat and tonsils--as a gargle--and he recom­ mends moist heat for inflammations gen­ erally, and of mucous membranes in particular. We once beard Dr. Parker remark that there is much truth in the old Thompsonian aphorism that "heat is life and cold is death," and we are glad to know that the common sense views of the founder of the botanical school are being received far and jpfUfai. --Dr. Footed Health Monthly. > \ • Healthful Stimulation. Diffusible stimulants, provided they be abso­ lutely pure, are among the most nseful medici­ nal agents employed by physicians. When the tone of the system is lowering by the depress­ ing influences of disease, or there is an inherent want of vigor in the constitution, they serve to counteract weakening tendencies, and choer the mind of tbe desponding invalid. But when, as la the case of Hostetter's Stomach Bitters, they possess tonic and alterative properties, their effects an rendered permanent, and they accomplish a trebly beneficial result. The Bit- ters not only relieve nervous debility and men- tal depression, by their healthful stimulative action, but iarnse abidhtgvlgor into the depleted system, and rectify those internal dis­ turbances which are the real causes of weak- ness. The purity and the wholeeomeness of the alcoholic baste of the Bitters greatly in- crfaaes the tffl.acy of their botuiic ingredients, I a fact wbtah the completeness of their curative i effects snfBatoatly demonstrates. him a monster! Experts tell us that the brain fs the sound­ est of all organs, and they credit the ajtorm- ing inciea<e of insanity to derangements Of' the sto.uach. What the stomach is the blood will be, and bad blood has a very evil effect on the bruin. Dyspepsia is a dangerous dis­ order, and yet It is far too often neglected when It might be checked or cured. H. 8. Benedict, for thirty-live years express agent up in Troy, has often related how tor a long time h:s life was an unbearable burden. He says he wouUtjrathor die than go through his old dyspeptic experiences. And John Btting, the widely known t dd Fellow, of Hudson, in­ forms u j that What b:-pran in sour Stomach, heartburn, lumpy sensations, and occasional constipation, resulted in confirmed dyspepsia, intense heat and distress in the stomach, belching of wind, hard anJ • bloated bowels, loss of appetite, constant constipation, sick headache, and a despondent, irritable condi­ tion of mind. These gentlemen can realize, sands of others, to what violence dyspepsia may drive a man! Hafflty for them they escaped mental frensy by the timely use of Dr. David Kennedy's Favorite Remedy, of Kondout, N. Y., a pure vegetable, non-alcoholic compound which in tbe past twenty years has cured In SO per cent, of caees. It has a very large sale, and is regard­ ed by physlcliins as most valuable for stom­ ach, malarial, liver, kidney, urinary, female and blood disorders. If we would escnpethe full penalties ot dys­ pepsia, we must arrest it before it becomes chronic and sets the blood and brain on Are. of erode ail are so It Is uattMSSsary to ©srboiine la made from Oil devoid of smell, and IS guaranteed to rtaaoro aeurf and dandruff. Was afflicted with Catarrh and Cold in the Head. I tried many remedies without any beneficial effects. At last I used Ely's Cream Balm, which effectually cured me.--W. H. L HUUSD, Dentist, Bordentown, N. J. Mfenaan'a FBHOSGBED BEEP TOXIC, tbe only preparation of beef coataining its en­ tire nutritious properties It oontainsblood. foroe-generating and life-sustaining j invaluable for indigestion, dvs> nervous prostration, and all forms Of "general debility; also, in all enfeebled conditions, whether tL« result of exhaustion, nervous prostration, over-work, or acute disease, particularly if resulting from pulmo­ nary complaints, Caswell, Hazard ft Ca, proprietors. Mow York. Hold by druggists. "Bough on Rats" clears out Rats, Mice lSo. Mother Swan's Worm Syrup, tasteless. 25c. "Roughon Coughs" Troches, 15c; Liquid,50c. Watxs* Mav- Apple (Liver) Pills, 10c. "Rough on Toothache," Instant relief. 15c. "Buchn-p-iiba,™ Great Kidney and tTrinuy Out*. SI. "Rough on Corns," tor Corns, Warts, Bunions. Mo. WELLS' Health Renewer cam Dyspepsia, Impotono*. The "Rough on" Tr.o'h Powder, elegant. 15c. "WK always keep Plso's Cure for Consump­ tion In tho houfe." A Terra Del Fuojro Water-Scape. "While seated at their midday meal, they have before their eyes a moving world of nature, such as may be found only in her wildest solitudes. All around the kelp-bed porpoises are plowing the water, now and then bound­ ing up out of it; while seals and sea- otters show their human-like heads, swimming among the weeds. Birds hover above, in such numbers as to darken the air; at intervals individual birds dart down and go under with a plunge that sends the spray aloft in showers, white as asnow-drifiL Others do their fishing seated on the water; for there are many different kinds of water-fowl here represented: gulls, shags, cormorants, gannets, noddies and petrels, with several species of anativas among them the beautiful black-necked swan. Nor are they all sea-birds, or exclusively inhabitants of the water. Some of those wheeling in the air above are eagles, hawks and vultures--the last, the Chilian jota. Even the gigantic condor often extends its flight to the Land of Fire, whose mountains are but a continuation of the great Andean chain.--From m The Land of Fire," by Capt. Mayne Reid, in St. Nicholas. Twvnty-fiT* Per Ont. Stronger than Any Other Butter Color. BURLINGTON, VT., May 8,1888. I hereby certify that I have examined the Butter Color prepared by Wells Richardson * Co., and that the same is free from alkali or any other substance injurious to health; that 1 have compared it with some of the best of the other Butter Colors in the market and find it to be more than 26 per cent, stronger in oolor than the best of the others. 1 am satisfied that it la not liable to become rancid, cr In any way to injure the butter. 1 have examined it after two months' free ex­ posure to the air in a plaoe liable to large changes of temperature, and found no traoe of rancidity, while other kinds similarly ex­ posed became rancid. A. H. BABIN. Prof. Chemistry, University of Vermont. A MAN may not want to buy tbe eat. but when be runs it out of the pantry he becomes a purr chaser. Health Is Wealth. It Is worth mere than riches, for without it riches cannot be enjoyed. How many people are without health who might regain It by using Kidney-Wort. It acts upon the Liver, Bowels, and Kidneys, cleansing aiM stimulat­ ing them to healthy action. It cures all dis­ orders of these important organs, purifies the blood, and promotes the general health. Sold by all druggists. Sea advertisement. MANY a woman who does not know even the multiplation table can "figure" in soci­ ety.-- Yonker# Statarmm. In 1876 David Kennedy, M. D., of Rondout, one of the best known physicians and sur­ geons of New York, began to put his "Fa­ vorite Remedy" on the market, and It has had a wonderful success. He discovered and proved it in his practice, and knowing it was of great curative value he put it on the market. He has just completeJ a fine four- story building at Kondout and proposes U> push his business to the front. He has associated with himself Mr. George W. Elliott, who for eight yyars was associate and managing editor of the Rochester Dem­ ocrat and Chronich, and who for the past throe years has been at tbe head of the publishing department of H. H. Warner & Co. of Roch­ ester. He Is one of the beet posted men in newspaperdom, and has a natural capability in the advertising and publishing line. We congratulate Dr. Kennedy on securing so ex­ cellent a coadjutor.--Albnii!/ (JV. T.) Journal. Jps a drove of cattle get to bellowing "sou can't get so faraway from them that ytney will not be herd. ABXTREME TIRBO FSEI.INO.--A lady tells us "tne first bottle has done my daughter agreat deal of good, her food docs not distress her now, nor does she suffer from that extreme tired feeling which ebe did before taking Hood's Sarsaparilla." A second bottle effect­ ed a cure. No other preparation contains such a concentration of vitalizing, enriching, puri­ fying and invigorating properties as Hood's Sarsaparilla. Sold by druggists. 100 doses SI. GRAY is to be the fashionable color, and Spicer says he's a head of the fashion.--Bow- ton Bulletin. E^"Dlamond Dyes oolor anything any color, and never fail. Easiest and best way to ooonomize. 10c at all druggists. Wells, Rich­ ardson & Co., Burlington, Vt. Sample card, 32 colors, and book of directions for 2-cent stamp. THE horseshoe is a shoer si jn, and the only one we know of.--Boston Transcript. AT the dawn of womanhood, or In tbe change of life, Samaritan JXervitte Is the 1 ad­ dles' friend. •» .Ml ft, Jtisa Dr. cl CHwtuact, lok*telte rsif J&g ntm. We i *.v CONSUM ' >•%* Wm. c. m®*., Mrr-chut, of Kcwiing Green, WktltMd* afto lb tkjr- itctan luul circa Wr n M iuctirabW. H« aa» oUm <4 "»•!' "'vsi Sk-Ud MEN UM nutt Rheumatism,Ctfeiiralqi&, Sciatic*, Lunrtisjfl, Bsduuht, tlsaiiBM, TtliMkt. in 4t4* OVUKS soatLv riiss AMI UFLB> SMkr Dmlwiii Da«lmmrt«km. rUlf OMUakMSh Dlraotkoua la It l^agmtn. THE CHAKI.KS A. VOUKLRK Of. . . n«l. VOUELSHtCO.) tUlltaMT*, a<inC.S.l« ABERDEEN INK. Best Writing Fluid. Sample pack- llage, 15C; 10 for |l, FIBEY k HAOKBIT, AberdeenJ)«k. $250 IFFIISSS? Young Meni; Circular* free. VALEHTDOt B tustkm. Wis. LARGEST Dollars/ear. Best Paper for Farmer* and Hooae- WWi. Juliet Onraon'a Original Recipe* every week. 37th year. Specimen* froe. 25 Park Bow, NTY. ^ IF YOU WAHT TO MMCE MOIEY writ* to OABBXTXH* OO. Banket*, Washington. D.O. yantAMi (J\ MWKL8aa« ew fcoaMtafea* daratapaia XWnagr aadXM- nagr trTB11,","', VWM IHwdwaand aU Hawaii Omiglatrts. gracmnfoor or «a& » wn nnur oou OOMmPATION, nut, and MWUMATIMI, » ---tug na f i-i mi ii mi in CLBAN8INNBtheBLOOD •hanormalpoiwi to tlaow off dlaa--. THOUSANDS OP CASKS P1BPCOTLY OURIO. raid, «t. uqtm oa DKT, SOW SY wnxam, Pry ean be aant bar n»H WSXJ4, miCHJJUDSOir m, Co., BurUsrtao, Vt. S M itaaa far Diary <lm«na« lor ltM. K I D N E Y - W O F . I HOP PLASTER Crick In tlie Baek, Mda or Hip, Thla purou* planter la famoua tor it* quick aai houtj action ia earing Lame " ' Keonlgia, TrooUe* i Joist* aadanpaiaa and Muaclea, Soto Cheat. Kldaey XrraMea and or aoheaeitherloealordeepeeated. ItSoothea.f en* and BttanMasth* part* The Tlrtaea ot kopa cota- blned with gam* rlaan and ready to apply. Saperturte and aahm-Friee K cento or » Car |L<t Sold by 4nr andeoantry " an re­ ceipt of prloa. Bop Flatter Ctaipaay.Pra- la t̂ora, Boaiten, Umm. A GREAT 8UOOE88 ( I " W The beat faatfly *111 Ltrcr Pill*, fc Pleaaaat In action aadeMy to tahe. ELY'S CREAM BALK raaaon. THE man who was kicked out of a seaside resort was caught by the undor^toe.--Mara­ thon Independent, Piso's Remedy for Catarrh to oonveaientto aae and eairy whan onajoucttf; -f " • IT * * ~ It \nS , <J4*. *j V'-V THE height of gluttony--to devour the wings of time. FROM North Hampton, N. H., Mrs. L. B. Tarlton writes: "Samaritan Nervine cured my eon." BASHJUX proverb--A run in time eaves the nine. | A Remedy for Long Dlaenaea. Dr. Robert Newton, late President of tho Eclectic college, of the city of New York, and formerly of Cincinnati, Ohio, used Dr. Wm. Hall's Balsam very extensively in his prac­ tice, as many of his patients, now living, and restored to health by the use of this Invalu­ able medicine, can amply testify. He always gald that so good a remedy ought to be pre­ scribed freely by every physician as a sove­ reign remedy in all cases of lung diseases. It cures consumption, and has no etjual for all pectoral complaints. ' Indorsed t»y the Clergy. We take pleasure in recommenfflfnf thr. Warner's Whtta^MTlne of Tar Syrup to any public sreake«H§ may be troubled with throat or lungaHpie. Rev. M. L. Booher, pastor Prestyterian church, Beading, Mich. Rev. J. T. lddinga, Albion, Mich. Rev. V. L. Lockwood, Ann Arbor, Mich. CHRONIC CATARRH.--I have suffered for years from Chronic Catarrh. Six weeks ago I was induced to try Ely's Cream Balm. Re­ lief was instantaneous, and continued use has resulted in an qjbnost complete cure -R » ? • A ' mrdwilw. Price SO rents, brmail ELY BUOTHTOB. DregKfrS. Owago, H.Y. paaaagaa ft nopal oolda. oomplete- ly heals the aorM.and watoras sense of taate md smell. KOTU^roor A tew applications relieve. A thorough treatment %dtt curt. Agreeable to nae. Send • mail or at draggiite. •WATS CURABLE BY MEXICAN1 MUSTANG LINIMENT. Frost end all external diaeaas*. and *Teryfcnrtor i Zhrt«uml neain Hastily, atafaleand etock yaidttii LINIMENTS Ia hararieas to the naoat da eontaJaa am Option K i I by I I! 1* i any Same! -*•» BtaMataasi Sanaa, ta tatty everybody who hu given itagnd aU. U !Unr Mb S Maa BcKet. ^ As an Expectorant It has no Ifipial SOLD BY ALL MEPICIXE AGENTS WANTED for tho best undtaataafceeUag Pictorial Booksmi<l Prieesn4Nced ® Oereent NATIONAL PUBLISHING CO» Chicago, UI. T1MUE- MAltKS, I'KJNTS, LAltDi.S, uonr Intention. I. KIXGBAM, Patent Lawyer i on Patent* frtt), Wimkingtmt, D. C. people hare become rich woridag tor us. we oSSer jrou a botir which la eaay to ieam-aae i yaltfpwi of iiiaeey h»j tvwy eaa who it ̂ rtlmig to i PATENTS A. No capita] rwpiired. You run no risk whatever. - home. Full partk-ularafroe. eaaget rich. Ha, • laatia, a*M >»i m ievejr. You need M* from Ifakdclph *St, SSm. Ul. *0 fAlSSl, 10 P •C S* I|1W able. Don't buy any Heeda Write for my splendid Bin --FKEE. H W. BUOKHBB. v.i-w ;! 1.... '^sM .1 ,W lii or the IJUIIL. atlmaaaSta eal mr». J fa er PAULINO remedy to «... MM la ae raaaon Mr set now leeaMag ei eaea foe a traaUae art a Piee paifiret remedy, otee Bigwiart Peat Ottea. . . Tt SPECULATORS. ORAIH * • 5>i it f w ,v, usauat THE KIT, ,.l . J :J ed to tfve aaMa&glpa. Bwe niin«wi».cwii|fc SEEDS Warranted. 1 CHEAPEST and beat la ths world. Stmt « good, and purr, direct from the Ctowwer. or Postage paid to yon., ienera buy and plant my My new befcattfhTillnsti-a- ted Garden Guides eoat SMtaOOU. FBKK to everyhodr. Seeds at Sc. . , nor pkt Cbeap aa dirt l>v oa. A ». Send your address for prettiest CntEMNHE riintiHt. u. H. sHvvnrAT, Bedusvd, m. Introdacinfr the **1 cutting. TIM? simploat profit*. Quick return*. out/It only Sl.OCL 8**lan retail* at I territory at once. Every lady who i _-- dreaamaker will buy one ondght. IbahlWll Be Bret in tbe Held. Dontho^dbet* aadlatacail ana else (Kt in aheed. lncloae atawn tor woaapt SM>r. Addreiw HON TOM CThe Oldest Medicine hi the laHa Dr. Inue ~ •IABRAM EH TTUaartidela a carefoBy ] i',V «l>- '•v, 7 ̂ RI ILVJ cenrary. and notwi ations that have beea C. K. C. lections are touoweo K win never falL larly invite the attention ot phjrwciaus ' **s i" Tkompmtn, Ham* « Oa. i . v l '« !, .V.. S * • k