The following text may have been generated by Optical Character Recognition, with varying degrees of accuracy. Reader beware!

enrg |?l3indcalcr PPBfflWPPPipipSHP I. VAN SLYKC. EMterand P»Wi«he;. McHENRY, ILLINOIS. MY FIRST PAIR Of BBKKCHKS. •few dr«r to ray heart were my first p*lr of breeches, Although now wore oat I remember theia stiil; Hwy'd been in tbe house » year or two pre­ vious. And wre formerly owB«d by my bis brother BUI. Sow my eyes opened wide In great expectation, whori told that new breeches for me wonld „ , be made; ||w I felt in my heart a *' range agitation And laugh d when 1 thought how I'd lock to arrayed. 9&ey were not cut op in fashion, of that IH as­ sure yon; They came to the knees, no snsponders were worn; A 'lratca in those days wonld excite no great -• *'•. notice. If in climbing a fence my new breeches were :.*«i torn. When 1 tir-^t put them on a pecnliar sensation Arose in my bosom that gave me great joy, For now all the neighbors who'd wanl inlorma- tion,. Conld see that no girl I was, but a big boy. "Aad the pockets, how large, how deep, and how roomy; <'f 'Shad a place for my marbles, my top, and my b 11. Z tonnd one behind--why, "was nothing but as pockets! There were three that were largeand'ene that was small. When 1 strutted out proudly, an audible titter From one of t he boys gave me some little pain: When he mid: "can your mother make pants fit no bettor? ' : Isald naught for answer, bat looked with disdain. Sifcxn those days of ear childhood, alas! we've 5 ̂ now parted;' ' Does yorir fir>t i air of b:eeches ne'er give you a thought.;1 Did they not fit you better, at least you did think so, Than thos from the tailor that since you have bought. Hit now when you see that new breeches are T needed # tailor you'll find you must first interview, Afed your purchase of pants will perhaps be impeded. He's not like our mother, he will not trust • you. --of. Louis Republican. THANKS TO THE FOB. "Come over to England to settle down, old man?" inquired Yal Forrest- ej. as be lit another cigarette, and lounging back in his comfortable arm chair, looked contemplatively up at the ceiling. A conscious smile hovered round the yellow tips of Captain Vivian's mus­ taches. "Well, I don't know," he said slowly. "Mean to take a look rouud, and see what is going on. "Whatever you do, eschew good looks. Pleasant enough. I'll allow, if iyou could keep them for your own con- j rotmdherprettyTips. himself, slipping into his overooat as he came toward them. "How do, Dorrington--pretlv fit? "AS tit as yourself. I was just going round to pay my rerpects to Lady Wa- verly. My friend, Captain Vivian" (Sir Guy raised his hat) "is dying to be -- troduced." "So sorry you can't see her; but she's laid up with a headache. Come well have a smoke." With a blank face they turned round, thinking a cigarette a poor consolation for their disappointment. "The fellow can't be jealous of me al­ ready," ruminated Frank, "unless she told him what she is snre to make point of forgetting. I thought she always seemed to want me; but women are queer creatures --prone to beckon one minute, and turn the cold shoulder if you venture to come. I won't have anything to do with them; I'll be banged if I bother myself about them again," he added energetically, as he threw the end of his cigar on the steps. Nevertheless, he was conscious of every movement in the Waverleys* box, and his indignation rose sky-high as he saw man after man admitted during the course of the evening. Patti sang her sweetest, but he scarcely heard her A pretty girl, a great ally of his before lie started for India, looked over her shoulder with a smile which would have induced any other man to take up only too gladly the broken thread of a past flirtation, but he remained as unresponsive as a block of stone. On leaving the theater he refused all invitations to enticing little suppers, such as used to have a special charm for him when he was in the vein for liuiusement, and early the next morn­ ing started for his home in Cornwall, in a pronounced lit of sulks. "So Captain Vivian, the faithful and fascinating Lancer, has returned to the field of his former conquests, and poor Charlie's last chance is gone," said Lady Waverly, looking up into her cousin's serious face, with amischevious twinkle in her eye. "Captain Vivian, to judge from the way his coat sets, is faithful to his tail­ or, but there his fidelity end?. Poor Mary Armstrong, who set just in front of him, nearly dislocated her stumpy little neck in her efforts to look at him, and lie didn't know she was there." "Flattering to you, my dear, at any rate." "I don't see why," drawing up her own neck, which was anything but stumpy. "I was too much occupied with the dear old General to notice him." "Then perhaps he was not so cruel to Mary as you fancied ?" a smile hovering sumption; but an intolerable nuisance, as you can't blind your friends." ! "Humph! A plain face opposite to •you day after day would be deuced .unpleasant" j "Yes, but a beauty is the devil. Poor •Cornwall never got over "it, when his ,"wife had once be -ome the fashion She ttook all the individuality out of him, <aod as Mrs. Cornwall's husband, he jprovided a carpet for other men to [tread on. Have you got any one in jyoureye?" j Vivian blushed liked a girl. "I--I j---don't know just yet. It's five years wince I saw her." i "Time for a woman to be married i«ver and over again; or, worse than thai, she might have had the smallpox lor lost an eye. What's her name, and where does she hang out?" The other leaned forward, and low- jered his voice. "Mind--strict confi­ dence--Mabel Loraine." 1 "By Jove!" and Val Forrester sat jbolt upright, an expression of dismay jpassing over his pleasant face." j "What are you looking like that for? {Xou are not hard hit. It's not a case jof 111 have her--or die. I "No, no, nothing of the sort," the jwfciteness of his cheeks belieing his /Words. "I was at her wedding last month." : _ Frank Vivian stooped to pick up the jcigar he had dropped. "Her name ?" ;His voice was calm but hoarse, i "Lady Waverley. Her husband's •Sir Guy. He ran a horse for the Der- jby, but it fell dead lame before it .reached the corner. Have a B. and S ?" •as Vivian rose in a hurry. < "Thanks. Can't stop. Forgotten an appointment. Ta, ta." With his hat drawn over his eyes, lie hurried down •the steps of the Army and Navy, up St. James' street into Piccadilly, not car­ ing in the least where he went, only* anxious to get away from the continual greetings of his friends. Knowing that romance was a thing !to be sneered at, that true love "He bowed to her once, but that was all" "How could you tell if you didn't look at him?" "I couldn't help looking at him to a certain extent, when he was just under TJXJ nose." "It must have been a disagreeable necessity." "It was. I used to think he wasn't bad-looking. Last night he looked hideous." "But you are short-sighted, and he kept at a distance." "I am thankful he did--old friends are such a bore," her cheeks which were as soft as velvet, coloring like a Jacqueminot rose. "Then I won't ask him to dinner." "Pray do, if you feel inclined.". "Not if you don't wish it." "Oh, I can talk to somebody else." "I suppose I must wait until I have made his acquaintance." "That can be easily managed. Char­ lie, as you call him, would introduce him." "Rather hard on Charlie--asking a man to sign his own death warrant." "Major Wentworth wouldn't care if he had to." 1 "My dear, is he so far gone as that." "I mean that he would regard it as waste paper, and live contentedly ever afterward." "You'il have to decide between the two before long." "I have decided--long ago." "And which is it to be?" lifting her head in sudden eagerness. "Neither," and she hurried out of the room, saying that she must go and put on her habit. In spite of her protestations, Mabel Loraine kepther lovely eyes wide open, in case an old friend might be inclined to make himself a nuisance--and found the Bow empty, because he wasn't there : » ' • • -* * * * . * The season was over, and one of its S^TTE^FF^D^XHEU ZDOABT?D BELLE8 HAD>-bnriprl his in ,1 Jfi,„ i* !th® w,hole campaign, and reached the end desired of many--and given to buried his dream in the depths of his heart, and flirted with the Calcutta bells as gayly as the rest of his brother officers. Now it was all over--the dream as ,well as the hope of realization. He had thought that even in this prosaic ace he had found one verse of poetry; but the page was a blank,and the verse, if ever written by any other pen than bis own conceit, had been most care­ fully erased. Unless to pull a wry face for other men to laugh at; better to grin and bear it, telling himself that matrimony was ever a lottery and the greatest prizes had a knack of turning Out far worse than blanks, i * * * * * ' It was the first night of the pearl of taj»era singers after a lengthy absence, land Convent Garden was crammed from the stalls to the ceiling. The second act was over, and Vivian stood bp in the third row of stalls to let his (glasses wander round the house on a hroyage of discovery. A friend tapped ibim on the shoulder. "Look at Wa- jverley. He doesn't look much amiss, none. She shrugged her shoulders in answer to Lady Waverley's expostula­ tions. "Even in the marriage vow you have to take a man 'for better or worse,' and with the 'worst' alternative before my eyes I cannot turn my back on sin­ gle blessedness. Let me be, my silly old May; I might be happy as an old maid, hut miserable with an unsatisfac­ tory# husband." "I wish that tiresome Captain Vivian had kept out of the way." "Just what he has done." An invol­ untary sigh escaped her. "Six months in England, and we have never met. I wanted to see him to ask after the liawlandsons." "Why didn't you -write him a fcote and tell him so?7* -I "Ask him to come up to Cornwall, or down from Scotland, to tell me if Mrs. Rowlandson's last baby had cut its teeth!" "At least it would have broken the ice." "If there is any ice I should be the last woman on earth to break it. You though he's just passed through that ought to know that by this time." jgrave of affections, a honeymoon. His ^wife's a stunner, and not a bit stand- joffish, BO they say. Couldn't see her on frer wedding day, her veil had such a beastly pattern; but to-night, by jGeorge, she repays you!" A pause: She s smiling at one of us," excitedly. J"You don't know her, so it must be me. &et us go up; I'll introduce vou." t A bitter smile hovered around Vi­ dian's mouth, but he said nothing. She idhose to smile at him with the prettiest lips in the world, with the same blush as when they parted so miserably under trees, but his face was grave and impassive. Looking over his shoulder, .before he disappeared through the doorway, he saw that an old man with ^ray hair had taken Sir Guy's place in the front of the box. WithDorrin ton ©n one side, this stranger on the other, Ifcere would be no opportunity for pri­ vate conversation, but he felt it was Worth the journey from India only to a&and within sound of her voice, within •each of the glance of her eye--worth * large sum in pounds, shillings, and rnce although to hear her was torture, see her, madness. Love must be Uery bad for Us when it turns the • Jfisest among us into fools. On their way they met the baronet Don't freeze me in order that I mayn't forget it," laughing softly. "Put on your prettiest gown to-night." "Why V" covert eagerness in her tawny eyes, "Because Guy doesn't care to go out with dowdy women." Pshaw ! I really thought----" She paused, her level brows drawn togeth­ er, as she felt an inconvenient blush in the act of convicting her. "That Captain Vivian would be there?" with a mischievous smile. "It would make no difference to me if he were," with great decision. "Of course not; so I shouldn't have thought of mentioning it" In order to please Sir Guy, Mabel Loraine seemed to have taken immense oare with her toilette that evening; and when she entered Mrs. Forrester's crowded rooms more than one pair of eyes followed her movements with fer­ vent admiration. Her eager glance had told her that her old friend was there, and her heart b»jat tumultuously, when, for the first time after many years, she found her hand in his. In her struggle fojr outward composure she fell into the extreme of appai ent coldness. Her long lashes drooped nervously on the velvet of her cheeks, and her lips parted in a chilly smile Unable to judge by anything but out ward sight Vivian drew back, dis­ gusted and disappointed. "Let me introduce you to my cous­ in." she said hurredly," and before she had mentioned her name Mrs. Forrester bustled up and asked her to take a place in the upper row, which Major Wentworth had been keeping for her all the evening. Wishing the amateur theatricals at the bottom of the sea,Ma­ bel obediently followed her hostess and found herself, to all intents and pur­ poses, a prisoner, with the faithful Charlie by her side, and bent on mak­ ing all the running now that he had distanced his rivals by the craftiness of his maneuvers. Frank Vivian, savage as the typical bear with a wound in his ear, dropped into the seat beside Lady Waverley, determined to show his faithless love that, although she had chosen to go off with another, he was by no means "left lamenting." When she smiled on him he fled to the Land's End; now that she didn't smile on him, with the perversity of man, he felt aggrieved, and resolved to call in Chesterfield Gardens on the first opportunity. With no less than three objects in view--to Btab Mabel to the heart, to allay Sir Guy's fancied jealously, to gain an in­ vitation to the baronet's house--he en­ tered into a desperate fliration with the pretty girl, who was, as he supposed, Lady Waverley'8 cousin. He vase so good to iook at, that she could not help raising her eyes to his faoe with a bewitching smile. He was Mabel's particular friend, so of course it was only kind of her to be civil. She wanted to get him on her visiting list, for Mabel's sake, so it would not do to begin with a snub. And these reasons combined to make Lady Waverley as charming as possible. An arrant but harmless coquette, she was accustomed to flattery as the natur­ al source to conversation, but Captain Vivan, with the fair, frank face that seemed to mean no harm, went further than any other man on so brief an ac­ quaintance, except Sir Guy, and he had meant to carry off the prize from the beginning. A thrill of pleasurable ex­ citement darted through her heart as she listened to his musical voice, grad­ ually sinking till little above a whisper, as she looked into the earnest eyes which seemed to express in their fer­ vent glance all that the audacious tongue left unsaid; as she felt that she was flirting, really flirting, but only for Mabel's sake. "You have noverbeen to Chesterfield Gardens to see your old friends?" and she threw a laughing glance toward that ill-used maiden, who knew very well what was passing behind her back. "An old friendship after the interval of years is apt to grow musty. I prefer going in for the new." "Very rude to my cousin," with a shrug of her white shoulders. "Is not tbe fault yours if you make any other answer impossible?" "Mabel is the dearest woman under the sun," she replied with sudden ir­ relevancy. "I agree with you," was the quiet an­ swer ; "a capricious woman is dear at any price." "You do her gross injustice. If you don't believe me, ask Sir Guy." A look of amusement skone from his eyes. "Hardly; you are told not to trust your dearest friend about a horse." How does that apply?" raising her eyebrows. Perfectly. A man is bound to tell any umount of lies about his wife . They are moving toward the supper room--before anyone else claims you, let me," standing up and offering his arm in the moat empresse manner, ba- cause Mabel's eyes chanced to be turn­ ed in his direction. Eight undei Sir Guy's nose he led his wife out of the room, bending over her and asking for a flower from her boquet before they were quite out of sight. His last chance of being asked to Ches­ terfield Gardens was ruinnd before they reached the bottom of the stair­ case, even while he was priding him­ self on his diplomacy and attempting to throw his handful of foolish dust in­ to the baronet's eyes. "I thought of asking Captain Vivian to dine with us on Friday," said Lady Waverley, sweetly, toward the end of the evening. "I 'want to be civil to him for Mabel's sake." "Mabel be hanged!" growled Sir Guy, in a pet. "If he puts his foot in­ side my doorway, be gad! I'll stop at home to kick him out." After this the subject was dropped. Tiie two lovers were as hopelessly separated by an unfortunate mistake as the palm-tree and the pine of Heine's verses. Finding that his presenco was not desired at Chesterfield Gardens, Vivian made up his mind to leave Lon­ don. Although he had been foolish enough to angle for an invitation, in his calmer moments he was forced to ac­ knowledge that it was better refused than given. The mere sight of Mabel's loveliness was enough to incite him to madness, and one word of kindness might have tempted him to try if the fire in his own breath could not have melted the icy barrier between them And then the end must have been sor­ row, and might have been dishonor. Before starting for Paris it was nec­ essary for him to pay a visit to the fam­ ily solicitor, Mr. Prendergast, in Lin­ coln's Inn. Val Forrester, who hap­ pened to be with him at the club when he announced his intention, with a tired, dreary yawn, said: "Take the brougham. I only came out in it to­ day because of this horrid fog, and it will be a charity to give the horse some exercise, instead of keeping it at the door." Seeing the wisdom of this sugges­ tion, Frank accepted, and feeling rath­ er like an eminent physician on his way to a patient, was driven at a cautious pace to Lincoln's Inn. By a curious coincidence, Sir Guy Waverly happen­ ed to have paid a visit this very alter- noon to his own lawyer, who lived in the same house, though on a different floor, as Mr. Prendergast His wife had agreed to come and call for him, but when she saw a nasty pea-soup fo^ obscuring the view of her neighbor's window her courage failed her, and she willingly consented to let Mabel no in­ stead. The fog was denser than ever as she sat patiently in the carriage at the door of No. 33; but she was in no hurry. Every object in life seemed to be taken from her, and there was no use in hur­ rying when there was nothing to be lost by delay. A letter from Charlie Wentworth was in her pocket. The poor fellow pleaded his suit in an hon­ est, manly manner, but his words brought no flutter to her heart, no tears to her eyes. Lost in thought, she did not look up as somebody came rap­ idly down the steps, jumped into the brougham, and shut the door after him. As he dropped onto the seat, he almost bounded out of it in his di^uuyr. Ten thousand pardons! Mabel 1 O God! it's not my fault! What are you crying for?" He caught hold of her hands and held them tight "You don't care--you can't care"--his chest heaved, his eyes fastened upon her, as if he Would devour her. "Youhate me; you hate me, you know you do, or you never would have married him." 'Married I What, do you mean ?" her heart beating fast, hei cheeks as white as death. "Of course, I mean Sir Guy." "My consin's husband! What has that to do with me?" ; "Your cousin's! For God's sake, don't trifle with me. He married you, Mabel Loraine; they told me so at onca" "He married Mary Annabella Lo­ raine, who sometimes goes by that name. But you know her," drawing back. "You are laughing at me." "What a fool I have been!" as the scales dropped from his eyes. "I thought you were Lady Waverley all the while. Oh, my darling!" as* he caught her in his arms and pressed a shower of kisses on her lips* "it seems almost too good to be true." * * * * * ' " " j j * • ' The coachman, meanwhifo, imagin­ ing his master was in the carriage, pur­ sued his way westward tilt he drew 'ip 4at the door of No. -- Chesterfield Gar­ dens. "Very glad to see you, Captain Viv­ ian," said Lady Waverley, with a mis­ chievous twinkle in her eye. "But where is Sir Guy?" The two'lovers looked at each other in dismay. They had quite forgotten him.~-Whitehill Review. Caleb Cushing's Inconsistencies. Caleb Cushing voted for every bill which John Tyler vetoed, stoutly de­ fended the vetoes which came from the White House, and then again voted for them. This prompted Mr. Granger, of New York, to say in debate that Mr. Cushing's course reminded him often of the reply of an old woman who was asked what she thought of one of her neighbors by the name of Jones--not the editor of The Madisonian--aad with a very knowing look replied: Why, I don't like to say anything about my neighbors; but as to Mr. Jones, sometimes I think, and then again I don't know, but, after all, I rather guess he'll turn out to be a good deal such a sort of a man as I take him to be." The gentleman himself, said Mr. Granger, makes me think of a smart fellow I saw in a circus the other night; a very sprucely-dressed, active young man, who was equally ready to mount every horse that was brought within the ring. The first nag the honorable gentleman mounted was the Bank poney; and round he went mer­ rily to the sound of the music. Pres­ ently the stout horse Veto was brought out, when, giving tbe Bank pony a cut or two with his whip, up he sprang on Veto's back, and round the ring he again went with still more complacency than before. Then came the second bank bill, the gentleman voted for that; then what was called the little tariff bill, he believed the gentleman voted for that; and last of all followed the great revenue bill, he voted for that Yet, toting in succession for all these several bills when they were on their passage in the house, this same gentle­ man got up as soon as the vetoes one after another came in and defended the President's rejection of the meas­ ures he had himself supported by his votes with a servility which the gentle­ man from Accomac, Mr. Wise, would have scorned.--Boston Budget. Rum-FillfdWalking-Sticks. "There is a cane," Baid a well known dealer in gentlemen's furnishing goods, "that I have just patented. It was sug­ gested to me by the habit very young men have of wearing the heads of their sticks in their mouths. It is of bamboo, and lined with a thick covering of por­ celain. The head may be of whatever shape the purchaser desires. A crab's claw, a dog's head, or simply a straight ivory handle, but running through it is a fine tube, guarded at its outer end by a spring valve. You see at once the immediate advantage of such a cane." "It would be very light," observed his customer. "My dear sir," returned the haber­ dasher, "it can be filled with any liquid. If the young man who carries it is very young he can carry a supply <Jf milk with him, and as he strolls along Fith avenue refresh himself with cooling draughts of that harmless fluid. Think," he continued, enthusiastically, "of be­ ing able to carry with you to the thea­ ter a dozen whisky cocktails or a few brandy smashes. As you sit gazing abstractedly into the eyes of your fair companion, you can imbibe inspiration from here and rum from the cane at the same time. Besides, my patent doe3 away with those intensely harrassing excuses about 'going out to see a man,' or such statements as 'the gas makes me faint, I must get a breath of fresh air." "It's a wonderful idea," observed the customer, as he grasped the possibili­ ties of the invention. "Make me one big enough to hold a quart of ice-cream. I'm awfully fond of a girl and she's awfully fond of cream, but she prefers it mtflted. When I next, walk out with her I won't have to dodge around tlio corner from 'Freezem, the confection­ er,' but I can had her my stick and tell her to help herself." "That's a use for it that had not sug­ gested itself tome." concluded the pat­ entee, "but I assure you that I have already received suilicent orders from local option towns to insure my for­ tune."--N. Y. Morning Journal. The Problem of All Time. After the Concord School of Philos- ophy gets through discussing Emerson, it might add something to human knowledge if it would discuss this sub­ ject, vis.: Why is it, that when two young men and two young ladies, who are drifting toward an affectionate ac­ quaintance, set out for a walk in pairs, within speaking distance of each other, the young lady behind feels herself in duty bound to speak to the young man in front, and the young lady in front considers it equally her duty to speak to the young man behind; and why, if the young men should change partners, this peculiarity would still be observ­ ed ? It is strange that this should be so, but it is so, and perhaps the Con­ cord School of Philosophy can tell why it is so, if it will devote its powerful mind to it.--Somerville Journal. A Brief Interruption of Business. Scene--A Texas barber shop. Ber­ ber--Next! Customer--I believe I'm next. Other customer--I believe I'm next. Customer (grabbing a razor)--I'm next. Other customer (grabbing a razor) --I'm next A short but no;sy interval in which both customers are killed. Barber (to quiet stranger in tbe cor* , ner)--You're next. sir. AGRICULTURAL. VAWULATION in the dairy should be done at night or early in the morning, when the air is the coolest. BE careful not to grow potatoes near the peach trees, is the advioe of one who is familiar with peach growing. IN experiments made at the Wiscon­ sin Experiment Station with sorghum for fodder the Honev variety yielded best, White Mammotn next, and Early Orange third. THE want of pure and fresh water accounts in many instances for the lack of eggs during the winter season. Fowls require a constant supply of wa­ ter, and without it will not lay. A BOX 10x10x10} inches will.hold just half a bushel. Such a box may easily be made, and is very convenient to have on the farm. It is cheaper and just as good as a more expensive measure. CANADIAN cheese factories refuse to receive the milk of cows which are al­ lowed to feed on slough-grass or drink stagnant water, claiming such milk will always prevent the manufacture of good chese; that it is almost if not quite im­ possible to make good butter from the milk of cows fed on such stuff many a pioneer house-wife can testify. A MASSACHUSETTS farmer who raises asparagus extensively says that an ap­ plication of salt is of no use whatever, being only a practice that has been handed down for several generations. Perhaps the necessity for salt is less­ ened when asparagus is raised near the sea, where the soil and atmosphere are both impregnated with salt COLIC in horses may be quickly re­ lieved, as a general rule, by promptly covering the region of the stomach and sides with a horse-cloth or woolen rug, wrung out of boiling water, and cov­ ered with other cloths enough to re­ tain the heat. An equally effective remedy is a bran poultice as hot as can be borne; this retains the heat longer than the wet cloths will. B. F. JOHNSON writes from Illinois to the Country Gentleman to the fol­ lowing effect of a matter which certain­ ly should bring a flush of shame to the faces of owners of stock in a state which is supposed to be among the fore­ most in prosperous agriculture: "Great storms and severe cold are here regarded as of ten times the conse­ quence which they have in old and well-improved sections, for the reason that from 85 to 90 per cent of the en­ tire live stock' is without adequate shelter." A FARMER who has grown the Alsike clover the past season for the first time reports himself well pleased with it Cattle and horses eat it more readily than red clover, both as grass and hay. It is destitute of the slightly bitter flavor that detracts from the "value of fresh green clover. In an Alsike field cows will eat the new seeding in­ stead of waiting until starved to it, af­ ter knawing bare the old sod in fenoe corners. The crop of seed varies from five to as high as ten bushels per acre, but if the Alsike is left for seed its hay is much less valuable. Its superiority is manifest as compared with the chaff from red clover that has been thrashed for seed. TWENTY-FOTJB years ago, says John J. Thomas, we had three or four inches of sand carted on part of a garden, the soil of which is too clayey for the suc­ cessful or convenient raising of garden vegetables. When this sand was well worked in the whole became an excel­ lent sandy loam, just the soil for agree­ able working. The labor of drawing on the sand was considerable, but it was done in winter when there was lit­ tle else for the man and team to do,and the fine condition of the soil remains as good as at first, and probably will for a century to come, as the sand' does not evaporate, wash away, or become consumed in the growth of plants, as with manure. THE VALUE OF STRAW.--Straw is re­ garded as valueless on the majority of farms--it is accused of robbing the soi) of mineral matter in excess, and the conflicting claims can hardlv be recon­ ciled. Straw really takes from the soil valuable fertalizing material and also returns it to the soil when composted or fed to stock, allowance of course be­ ing made for that which is used in tho increased growth of the animal. In every one hundred pounds of straw there are from four to five pounds of ash, the ash containing potash, soda, magnesia, lime, phosphoric acid, sulr phuric acid, silica, chlorine and sulphur. No nitrogen is found, as it is driven off when reducing the straw to ash, but when the straw decomposes in the com­ post heap the traces of nitrogen, with a portion of carton, are absorbed and partially retained. Of wheat straw the proportion of potash is 0.40 per cent, while bean straw contains of potash as large a quality as 2.59 per cent; but whileythe bean straw is thus richer in potash than that of wheat, the latter contains seven times as much silica, which, though not really considered valuable as a fertilizer, as it always ex­ ists plentifully, is in a condition to be more readily appropriated by plants when returned to the soil in the straw. Barley contains a larger proportion of potash than oats, but oats require a greater quantity of soda, and yet those two minerals are very closely allied. Corn fodder contains 1.66 per cent, of potash, while peas contain 1.07 per cent. This indicates that corn fodder requires more potash than peas and less than beans, which contains more than double the proportion in peas. This is con­ trary to the general supposition that peas and beans feed alike on the same matter, as they are shown, in noticing the proportions of lime required by each to be rather dissimilar. Bean straw, which excels in potash, is considered a lime crop also; but while the crop of bean straw per one hundred pounds contains 1.35 per cent, of lime, the per­ centage of lime in pea straw is 1.86, thus demonstrating that the one prefers potash and the other lime. This differ­ ence between peas and benns exist in the seeds also, as the beans contain more potash than peas, though the lime exists in each in nearly the same quantity. Oats are supposed to be ex­ hausting to the soil, but while the straw is really richer in potash than that of wheat, the gra n of wheat exceeds the grain of oats largely in nearly all the mineral elements, while the grain of buckwheat s deficient in nearly everything that composes the ash as compared with wheat. As straw thus possesses value according to the soil, it is plain that wnenever it is sold or removed from the farm it carries away a certain pro­ portion of the elements derived during the process of growth, and a farm can be improvished as easily by the removal of products that are considered value­ less, as by the removal of those that find a ready sale in the market. It may correqfly be claimed that ihere is nothing preduced but which mny be put to some purpose. Straw should be utilized fox f*-ti^niTi m it is excellent when fed in conneetion with gram; and when used for bedding, it should be cut fine, in order to admit of rapid decomposition. The whole stalks being composed largely of silica, do not become fit for plant food until after a great length of time, but when cut into pieces the moisture and heat act quick­ ly, and soon disintegrate it. All kinds of straw are therefore valuable, and if several kinds are mixed together in the same compost heap, abetter fertilizing material will be obtained than from any one kind separately. HOUSEKEEPERS' HELFFE IJOILED FBESH COD.--Sew up the fish in a thin cloth and boil in salted water allowing fifteen minutes to the pound. CUSTABD PUDDING.--One pint of milk, three eggs, three-fourths of a cup­ ful of sugar. Beat eggs and sugar to­ gether, pour on the milk and bake in a slow oven. FEICASSED SWEETBBEAD.--Cut into slices and simmer in gravy one hour; add a well beaten egg, two tablespoon- fuls of cream and one tablespoonful of chopped parsley. SCRAMBLED EGOS.--Heat one cup of sweet milk; then rub a tablespoonful of butter with a tablespoonful of flour and stir into the boiling milir Into this put six beaten eggs. PICKLED HALIBUT.--Take a piece of cold boiled halibut, put it in a bowl and pour over it hot vinegar in which has been boiled a little red pepper and one blade of mace; let it stand two days before using. FRIED BEEFSTEAK.--Beat the steak with a rolling pin; flour and season; fry with a sliced opinion until brown; lay the steak in a stew-pan and pour a cupful of hot water over it, and stir in tablespoonful of flour mixed with cold water. CHIPPED BEEF.--Heat together one and a half pints each of milk and water and thicken with a beaten egg and a little flour; when it has boiled five min­ utes add a quantity of chipped beef; stir in well and remove at once from the fire. MUTTON AND RICE.--Chop fine cold boiled mutton, and to each cupful add a cupful of boiled rice, butter a sauce­ pan, pour in four tablespoonfuls of water, add the meat and rice, season and add two beaten eggs. Stir until all are cooked. " APPLE PUDDING.--One quart of milk, three eggs, three teaspoonfuls of bak­ ing powder, two tablespoonfuls of melted butter, flour to make a thick batter; fill a dish half full of sliced apples and pour the batter over them. Bake two hours. CODFISH BALLS.--Wash and cut in small pieces about a pint of codfish, removing every bone; put on to boil with twice the quantity of pared pota­ toes ; when the potatoes are done mash well, adding a large lump of butter, half a teaspoonful of pepper and one or two eggs well beaten. Drop from the spoon in boiling lard and fry like doughnuts. LAMB'S FRY.--Take two pounds lamb's fry, cut tbe liver into slices, dredge all with flour and a little salt; fry tho fat first to a nice brown, then put in the liver, heart and pieces of sweetbread; fry gently until they are a light brown; put on a hot dish; pour a little water into the frying-pan, dredge in a little flour, pepper and salt, and let boil three or four minutes; pour over the fry. The Broadway of Bangkok. , It is quite a relief to turn from theso horrible iantasies--which look more frightful still in the ghostly dimness that surrounds them--to the fresh air and glorious sunshine that attend the crowning treat of our morning's work. For now comes the ascent of the pago­ da ^itself, to the farthest accessible point. The stair is so deep and slip­ pery, that I feel as if scaling the Great Pyramid once more. But a view from the highest platform would well repay a much greater exertion. All along either bank of the wide, smooth stream, which amply deserves the name of "Mother of Waters" (Menam), there start up from the dark foliage of the tropical fcrest the peaked roofs of bam­ boo huts, and the white walls of stately houses, and Tthe spear-pointed pinna­ cles of Buddhist shrines, and the gold- green roofs of Siamese temples. Boats of all sizes "from the tiny canoe pad­ dled by the doll-faced .woman with a basket-work hat, to the gilded barge with the gilded flag and white elephant of Siam fluttering at her stern, flit like fire-flies over the mighty river, which is the Broadway of Bangkok, as the creeks and canals are her side streets'; and beyond, far as the eye can reach extends a shadowy perspective of the low green rice fields, tangled thickets, stately cocoa-palms, slim, graceful are- cas, pillared banyans, shoo:ing down innumerable suckers into the earth from their vast spreading boughs, plumy fan-palms, tall, tapering bam­ boos, and broad-leafed bananas, with­ out order and without end.--David Jier in September Manhattan. He Asked a Blessing. Lew Campbeli, the "One Spoon Baking Powder" man, who travels South, was invited by a lady to dinner. The guests were all seated, and the lady, turning to Lew, said: "Mr. Campbell, will you ask a bless­ ing?" "Wha--wha--wha--I beg your par­ don, madam," he stammered, dropping his napkin. 'Will you please ask a blessing?" she repeated. Then she bowed her head, and so did everybody else, and poor Lew looked down at his plate and stuttered: "Lor--Lord, have mercy on these poor vittles. Amen."--Merchant Trav­ eller. A Sound Opinion. First Buiglar--Bill, I guess we'd better make arrangements to crack that bank in Bugleville. Second Burglar--But I thought we decided six months ago that it wouldn't be worth while to attempt the job. • First Burglar--Well, I've changed my mind. I'm pretty well satisfied now that there's money in it Second Burglar--Why, what have you heard about it? Got onto some­ thing new. First Burglar--Yes; I've discovered that the cashier has been sick at home for over four months. They must have accumulated some surplus by this time.--New York Sun. NEVER sit down and brood OTer trouble of any kind. If you are vexed with yourself or the word, this is no way to obtain satisfaction. Find your­ self employment that will keep _ your mind active, and, depend on it, this will force out unwelcome thoughts. A LONDON bill-poster goes about on a tricycle with brush and paste pot, at* Mr POINT. PITH AND "FWETTCH watering-places ? Anabo#* ination, sir! Why, I've been told of people bathing there 'in puris natural!- bus 1'" "Ah, I dessay! and some nop* even that!"--London Punch.- - ' YOUNG LAIRD (to newly-appointed footman): "Well, Donald, how do yon like trousers?" Donald (heretofore a gillie who has never worn anything bqfc kilts): "Aweel, sir, I fin' them veij|£ oncomfurtable about the sleeves, "-i.1 Scotch paper. LITTLE boy (st the front door)--"Is the doctor in ? 'Cause if he is I want ||i; see him right away." Servant--"He's not in." Little boy--"Well, just aa soon's he gets home you tell him to come over to our house and take baby off he left there last week. It In the way." MILKMAN--"Two quarts ? Yes, mum. Here it is. Only 26 cents, mum.* Housekeeper--"But stop. Isn't the% something the matter with this milk ?* Milkman--"O, no, mum. Perfectly pure, mum. Don't it look tempting now* mum?" Housekeeper--"Well, I mudt say it does make my mouth water." ~ "WHERE are you going pet?" asked* Brooklyn woman of her husband, witli whose relatives she was not on a very friendly footing. "I am going to call bn my folks," he replied; "but is not this coat rather shabby ?" "Yes," rf; plied the wife, turning up her nose; ° "but as long as you don't go among d4€ cent people it is good enough." "I THINK it is a burning shame," sligk- said, leaning on her croquet-mallet and gazing over the fence at a butcher who was driving some lambs to his slaugh­ ter-house, "that the dear little oreatnrei should be killed by those great, heart* less men. Just look at the poor, innd^, cent little things, Cicely. Isn't it brut­ al?" At dinner that day she was helped three times to lamb. "I AM sorry to inform you," wrote a son to his mother, "that I have been ar­ rested for grand larceny." "Ah, dearif me!" sighed the old ladv\ placing tha letter on her lap and wiping her spec­ tacles. "Poor boy! I was afeard suthin* would happen to him when he went West. But I am glad it's grand lar-; ceny. There allers was suthin' noble 'bout Charles, even when he was a boy ?" ISOLATION--off the Orkneys: South­ ern tourist--"Get any newspapers here?" Orcadian boatman--"Ou,~aye, when the steamer comes. If it's line she'll come once a week; but when it|t stormy, I' winter, wo dinna catch a glint o' her for three months at a time." S. T.--"Then you'll not know what's goin* on in London?" O. B.-- "Na; but yfr see ye're just as ill aff i' London as wa are, for ye dinna ken what's gaun oil here!"--London Punch. A LOOK AHEAD. Sins a song of nonsense. Silly Marry Ann; "Haw" is in th • kitchen Working like a man. "Paw" is in the countlntrhotis® Tolling bard for money; You are in the pnrlor. Don't you think it funny! Sing your sonar of nonsense; Some time, Mary Ann, You'll be in the kitchen, Working like a man. Husband in the counting-honsot Earning little money;. Daughter in the parlor. Then it won't be funay. j A SOUVENIR. f iis burn on my cheek, tall I tell how it came there? ease don't lisp a word, For 'tis reallr absurd. This burn on my cheek- Shall I tell how it came Utate* His face was so near. And the night was so da When he for a kiss pleai JliKt guess what I said- And the night was sodant. My answer was no. But he thought it meant "yes."' He forgot liis cigar- Well, here Is the Rear. My answer was no. But he thought it meant "yes.1' ;,;a How to Kill a Craving far Alcohol. While it is true that many who at one time indulged in ardent spirits have abstained later in life, it is not believed that there is any real cure for the thirst * created by alcoholism. But a person that claims to have cured himself gives a remedy that there would be uo harm in trying. We reproduce it in the res­ cued person's own words: "I was one of those unfortunates given to strong drink. When I left off I felt a horrid want for something I must have or go distracted. I could neither eat, work nor sleep. Explaining my affliction to a man of much education and experi­ ence ho advised me to make a decoction of ground quassia, a half ounce steeped in a pint ot vinegar, and to put a small teaspoonful of it in a little water, and to drink it down every time the liquor thirst came on me violently. I found it satisfied the cravings, and it also gave a feeling of stimulus and strength. I continued this cure and persevered till the thirst was conquered. For two years I have not tasted liquor, and I have no desire for it. Lately, to try my strength, I have handled and smelt whisky, but I have no temptation to take it. I give this for the considera­ tion of the poor unfortunates, several of whom I know have recovered by means which I no longer require.--Ex­ change. He Practiced. "What is that drab object hanging from the lower limb of that apple-tree?" asked a dude of a freckled country boy. "That," said the boy, "is a sort of foot-ball that wo strike to make our 'muckle' big." "May I try it?" asked the dude. "I guess so," replied the boy, as he moved off a good distance. So the dude drew back and drove his fist right into an old fashioned hornets' nest and got his sleeve chuck full. Send a 2-ceut stamp, with your n&me and address distinctly written, to the boy if you want anything like a true picture of the tinale. We are not equal to the task. --Puck. Uncle William on Rents. "Uncle William, how's rents up your way ?" he asked of an old colored man who was sauntering around the market. "Bents, sah--rents! Does you mean rents of houses ?" " Y 08.*' "Wail, sah, I doan' keep *no track of •'em 'tall." "But you live in a rented house?" "Yes, sah; but, when de landlord be­ gins to percolate aroun' fur his rent, I pulls out an' finds anoder cabin. It's a heap cheaper to move dan to argufy wid a landlord about wheder rents am up or down."--Detroit Free Press. SOME wicked fellow got iato a church vestry after the deacons and clergy held a meeting there, and left four beer bottles, a whisky flask, all empty, and two packs of cards under the * table. When the sewing society met an hour later and discovered the articles, they held a long and whispered conversa­ tion. THE world is a picnic to which every one takes his basket,to carry back what-