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' * ' " \ . * 7 »" + % * • Xi •' • < * - V . -• v*"* %>; - , •""**"•"* * 4 • * - • ~ •"•' •"., J ••• r. *V •* - . it * * ** -* * * * - • v • ' . . • • •irt fc Pledged but to Truth, to Ulberty and Law; No Favor* Win as and no Fear ShallAwe.' VOL. 10. M'HENRY, ILLINOIS, WEDNESDAY. JULY 1, 1885. M ¥• "' ' , ^ J . « • J / Jl^wj piuitaltt. Published Kv-y VtdnaidiT bT JT. VA '̂ SLYKE . sprroa AHD PUBLISH**. ce in Bishop's Block, --OPPOSITB PBRRT & OWIK'fc- J. TERMS or SUBSORIPTIOK. ' '""jSe^eiw(In Arfvilr.e) ...MA If Not Plld within Three Months...... .. 400 Subscriptions received for (three or aix Mouths in the Mine proportion. *r i Kates of Advertising* We announce liberal rates for advertising m the PLAINDEALER, and endeavor to state Ihem so plainly that they will be readily un- iersteod. They are|44t>JJow8; 1 Inch one year - ' - ' . . 500 t Inches one year »' - • . » 10 *0 S Inches one year - . • • -. 15 00 It Column one year , . - 30 B0 )i Column one year- • - 60 Oft Column one year - - - - . 300 00 One inch means tli* measurement of one nch down the column, single column width. Yearly advertisers, at the above rates, have the privilege of changing as often>as they thoose, without extra charge. Regular advertisers (meaning those having •tanaing cards) will be entitled to insortion •f local notices at the rate of 5 cents per line each week. All others will be charged 10 eents per !ine the fl?st week, and 5 cents per line for each subsequent week. Transient advertisements will be charged at the rate of 10 cents pe line, (nonpareil type, same as this is set in) the first issue, and (cents per line for subsequent issues. Th'is, an inch advertisement will cost H.00 for one week, $1.50 for two weeks, 92.00 for three weeks, and so on. The PLAWDKALBB will be liberal in giving •tutorial notices, but, as a business rule, it will require a suitable fee from everybody •eeking the use of its columns for pecuniary gain. BUSINESS CARDS. H. T. BROWN, M. D. PHYSICIAN ANI) SURGEON. Offlce at Residence, McHenry, III. C. H. FEGEliS, M. D- |>HrslClAN AND SUIttfEON, McHenry, I Ills. Office at Residence. O. J. HOWARD, M. D. |»HVSlOIAN AND SURGEON, McHenry, I 111. Offlce one door West of FiUsimmons i Bvanson's store, up Stairs. BARBIAN BROS. CIGAR Manufacturers, McHenry, 111. Or-ders solicited. Shop, la Old McHenry, JB Keiter Block, two doors 'west of PLAIN- MCALER Office. WASHINGTON, D. C The popular palace hotel of the National Capital. Conveniently located and accessible to all the street car lines of the city. Open all the year. O.G. STAPLES, PROPRIETOR. Late of the Thousand Island House. ROBT SCHIESSLE Having purchased the old stand of Joseph Wiedemann, NEAR THE DEPOT. McHENRY, ILLINOIS, Keeps open for the accommodation of the Public a First-Class Saloon and Restaurant, Where lie will at all times keep the|best brand* of Wines, I.lquors and Cigars to be found in tne market. Also Agent For FRANZ FALK'S MILWAUKEE LAGER BEER Beer In I^rge or Small Kegs or Bottles al­ ways en hand, cheaper than any other, if considered. Onjers by mail promptly attended to. ; GOOD STABLING FOR HOUSES. - '4BiPOall and see.us. Robert S<?kl«|a|* McHenmlU.. Kay 15th, 1MB. MARCUS' CERMAN s, BUSINESS CARDS. ASA W. SMITH, ATTORNEY AT LAW and Solicitor In Chancery.--Woodstock, ML S. F. BENNETT, M..I* HYSICIAN AND SURGEON. Also United States Examining Surgeon. Richmond, Illinois. A. 8. CHILDS, M. D-, HOMEOPATHIC PHYSICIAN AND SUR­GEON, West McHenry, III. Calls promptly attended to, day or night*. DR. C. R. WELLS. f PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON, Wauconda, Lake Co., 111. All calls promptly attend­ ed, day or night. Office on Main St., east of Barker's harness chop. MARY (i. BARBIAN. HAIR WORKER. All kinds of Hair Work done in flrst class style and at reasonable prices. Rooms at residence, north east corner of Public Square, McHenry, IIL DR. C. E. WILLIAMS. DENTIST. Residence Dundee. Will be at McHenry, at Parker House, the 10th llth 25th and 26th of each month. When dates opcur Saturday or Sunday I make my visits on the following Monday, and the first (lav of such visit occurs on Friday, I will stay but one day. A. M. CHURCH, Watchmaker and Jeweler NO. 55 FIFTH AVE., (Briggs House). Chi­cago, 111. Special attention given to re­ pairing Fine watches and Chronometers. ~^A Full Assortment of Goods in his line AT THE OLD STAND, JACOB BONSLETT, SALOON AND RESTAURANT, at the Old J stand, opposite Bishop's mill, McHenry, III. Thectioicest Wines, Liquors and Cigars to be found in the county. Warm or cold meals en short notice on application. GOOD STABLING FOR HORSES. J. PBKOVSKY, CIGAR MANUFACTURER, Wholesale and Retail Dealer. HANDLES nore but his own make,and will compare his Brands with the best mad* in the Stale. Store and Manufactory next door to the Post Offlce, McHenry, IIL I have a complete outai|of ENGINEERS' LEVELING INSTRUMENTS fnrttaking levels, locating drains and estab lishing grades for tile, an<t open ditches for Farm, District and Highway- Drainage, and all work requiring accurate leveling. Seventy-live per cent of tile draining done without an accurate survey fails to work to its fullest capacity. Instruments first-class and correct work guaranteed. C. II. TRVOX. P. O, address--Greenwood, III. i. SHORT HAND BY MAIL. Thoroughly taught by practical stenograph­ ers m Rowe'll & Hickcox' Correspondence Class of Vhonegraphy. Tuition t5 a term (12 lessons) two terms in the full course. The most popular, the largest, the oldest, ivott re­ liable class of shorthand in existence. Through it hundreds have acquired a thor- ough knowledge of Phonography. Write tor particulars and ciiculars. R0WELL ft HICKCX, Boston Haas. American agents for Isaac Pitman's Phono­ graphic Books, and dealers in all Shorthand Books And supplies. The American Shorthand Writer. (FOURTH TEAR.) The Cheapest Shorthand Journal In the United States. Each number contains fac-sl>nile reporting notes of eminent stenographers in the various systems of Isaac and Ben Pitman, Graham, Munson, Takgrafy, etc., And all the news in. tcreatlng to the profession. Contributed lo by leading stenographers. 8CBSUIPTION • 1.00 A THAR. Single Numbers, 15 Cents. Row ELL & HICKCOX, Boston, Mass. DO YOU KNOW THAT Plug Tobacco, With Red Tin Tag; Rose Leaf Fine Cut Chew tng; Navy Clippings, and Black, Brown and Yellow Snufs ure the best and the cboleest quality considered. M. IX)LEY, WAGON and CARRIAGE z?r, ~ •"3P*rvr ' ' ' Having leased the Wagon and Carriage Shop tf Simes ft Kelson, opposite the Parker House I am i.ow prepared to do all kinds ol work la this line OY &HOKT NOIICS, and GUARANTEE SATISFACTION. After a locg experience in the Eureka Car­ riage and Wagon Shops, in Canada, I am eon- fldent I can give satisfaction to ail who give me their patronage. Repairing of All Kinds 'v promptly Attended. UN. FOL1Y. West ^IcHenry, June 10,1886. J. C. KARGESp Hause, Sign and Carriage SI for 13 Weeks. The POLICE GAZETTE will be mailed, seonrelv wrapped, to any address in the United Staiea for three months on rcceipt of ONE DOLLAR. Liberal discount allowed to postmasters, agents and clubs. Sample copies mailed tree Address all "orders to RICHARD K. FOX, PRAXKLltf SQUARE, New York. Smdkers Call For ITIOSLB TAGS, OH S CENT STRAIGHT CIGAR. ^ S I L V E R T A G , Or S tor a Quarter Cigar. Soldiers' Department. CONDUCTED BT DR. 8. F. BENNETT. Shop at McHenry House, Near the Iron Bridgo. I am prepared to do all kin Is of Painting on chert notice, and guarantee satisfaction. Sign Painting a Specially. Call and see me if in want ol anything in the Painting line, as I am satistie I that I can please you, both In workmanship and price. J. C. Karges. McHenry, June 15, 1888. HE. W1UHTMAN, Proprietor, First class rigs, with or without drivers furnished at reasonable rates. Teaming ot all kinds done on short notice. J. P. SMITH, WATCHMAKER § JEWELER, HcHenry, - Illinois. H tviug moved into my new store, one door Vast of Mrs. Scarles' Millinery Store lam w»w-prepared to show to the buying public as flne a stock of ffiitfrhii. Monk* y Silver and Plated Ware, to be found in the county, whieh I|offer it prices thai cannot be beat. (finest line of The l^inger Ring^s, A»«r seen in this section, tpulaif Also^Agent .for li ejf» S«f Hoau Sswing 2heUu. A Fine Stock of CHOICE CONFECTIONERY, AND CIGARS. Always on hand. 4^Call In,examine goods an I 'iarn prices. Remember I will not be un lorsold, quality of goods considered. J. P. SMITH. McHenfy. tyl.,Oct. IS, 1*34. fOB BABQAINS IV .nm Manufactured by, p. MARGITS; •DEALER IN- Woodstock, III. Ths best Tonic in the world. Put up in fpftand Quart Bottles. F. MARCUS, Patentee. J|NT YOU FORGET IT! ASA W. SMITH, -OF-- Woodstock, -• - llllnola. Barked by Millions of money, offej you IHUEMNITT against damage by Flra, Lightning, Wind Storms, CYCLONES AND TORNADOES, DROP me a postal card and I will visit TOO; eat! on me and I will write you a policy, and wnen either or any of these destructive ele­ ments devastates your property, happy will you be if you hold one of my policies, for I will surety visit you, and Jminister unto you. ft^sot forsake yon. AAA y. SMtlH, Qm'lJnmumc* Ag Attention Horsemen! I would call the attentfion of the public to my Sta-ble ot Stock Horses, four in number: two Morgans, one 3-4 Percheron, and one Imported Horse. They are all good representatives of their breed. Also a few Merino Sheep 10 r sale. The public are cordially invited to call and examine stock, get prices, etc. No business done on Sunday. N. S. COLBY. lfrj-tf McHKNBY, ILL Culver House, RICHMOND. ILL. <0, K. CULVER, - - PROPRIETOR. HAVIN3 recently purchased the above House, I have put It in thorough repair, with {new furniture throughout, and would respectfully invite the patronage of the trav- eling public and ethers. The tables will al­ ways be provided with the best that can be procured, and polite and attentive waiters will be in readiness atall times to attend to the wants of guests. No pains will be spared to make this a first Class House. Large and commodious barns on the premises. Free Omnibus to and from all trains. Sample Rooms on first floor. BOBIBT C. BSH1I1TT, -BREEDER OF- Liibt Brahma RICHMOND, ILti. Wk t" (rntST REMIUM 4T MCHEKRT OOUXTT FAIR.) My fbwlsareof the celebrated DUKE O# YORK strain, remarkable for their great size and laying qualities. I can show a trio of last season's chicks weighing 31 pounds. Kggs, per setting of thirteen. $1.50, delivered to purchaser in Richmond. Shipped, securely packed, $2.00. MOBERT G BE&NET1• For Coal and Wood CALL OK- E. M. HOWE Opposite Bishop's Mill, 4Tho has a complete line of (lie best stoves in tke market, as well as a large stock of Harivare, Mechanic's Tools, TIM, COPPER & SHEET IRQN WARE, - And, «ln|ftiet, everything-in the hardware 4teve and tin line. HE WILL NOT BE UNDERSOLD. Call at his store before buying elsewhere, lobbinff and repairing promptly attended to *J" lie member, extra good bargains can al- •vftvs be obtained at Howe's. McHenry, Dec. 1, 1883. For "History, Romance and Philosophy of Great --„ American Crimes and Criminals." The most startling book of recent years. Biographical, Pictorial, 161 Superb Engravings with personal Portraits of the <;elobrated Criminals. 059 Royal Octave pages. Low retail price, 50. It is a work of *rt as well as of thrilling historic interest. Is bound to produce a profound impres»ion. Agents sen it by the thousands. A grand chance for canvassers. Send for particulars and lie convinced that this ts --_ .. .----- the most salable and profitable book published; or, to save time, •end 75 cents at once for canvassing Book and State your choice of townships. Address K. D. THOMPSON ft Co., publishers, St. Louis, Mo, ®r ixew York City. 4w Men Wanted. To sell our Nursery products, on salary and expenses paid by us, oi, if preferred, on com­ mission. Work every month in the year tor energetic and reliable men. Business easily learned. Wages liberal. Terms and outfit free. Address, stating age awl inclosing stamp, „ 1 & UHAS1 * Co J (The Chase Nurseries.) wun, V. X OR 1HOCENJ STRAIGHT CIGAR. The Finest Goods Ever Offered FORI SALE BT All First-Class Dealer* "" .<• 1. "S RETAILEKS ATTENTION. We advertise the above brands in the lead ing St. Louis dallies, and your name will ap pear among the list of agencies once a week for 60 days from date of last purchase. >Vith flrst order we send 3 neat and (prettv signs. We have one price for these good's from which there is noderiation, natnelv: Nii'kle Tag. 935.00; Silver Tag, SGS.OO; Gold" Tag, *70.00 per 1008. We also carry the most extensive line of Domestic, Key West and Imported Clears in the country, at bottom prices. Sample orders solicited. Goods guaranteed. Address, „ „ TAYL0B MF Q CO., 8t- Louis, Jto. n. P. Hull, Manager. TESTED*A EED0 TA&B.NR&MKGFTP'A WCS& KNIFE »;SS.VF^JELPPS HIRAM SIBLEY & CO. ROCHESTER, N. V. CHICAGO, ILL. ^a3-33tiE.M«inSt 200-I06R.NDC^PHSL WI l\|S LOW'!» ^"VineyardlRollerJ Skates. For the best, most durable and easiest run nlng Roller skates get the -'VINE VAUl)." VI the principal Rinks are using the "V iNKYARl)" Roller. Put up in All Clamp, Half Clamp and Strapped Complete. The demand for these skates is so great that they are kept in .stock by all principal har I ware dealers throughout the country. MikHwi-ifttuied by the Inventor and'Patentee SAMUEL WINSLOW, WORCESTER, MASS, P. HAUPERISCH, MoHeiirj, Illinois* <Veui I Inform the farmers of McHenry and surrounding country that he is prepared to sell them a FIRST-CLASS PLOW, Ann warrant the same,at a lower price than stn be purchased elsewhere in the county, Al< Hinds-of BLACKSMITH ING, MAGOS Mi I' ARRIAGE work promptly attended to. IIEPAIRING, f ai> kinds on short notice. WGive nsa tat land we will please you both in quality m < > rice of work. P. HAUPERISCH. M-tlenry, IIL. Oct. 7th, 1884. SALOON and RESTAURANT Buck's Old Stajcul, McHENRY, ILLINOIS. Fine Kentucky Liquors, French Bitters, McHenry Lager Beer, F&ika' Uilw&ukes Btsr, By the Bottle or Case. We buy none but the best and sell at Reasonable Prices. Call and see me and I wilt use you well. ANTONY ENGELN. McHenry, ill., 1884. w \ . .. - - Important to Ruptured Persons The Excelsior Rupture Cure M'f'g Co., ot Ogdensburg, N. Y.. guarantee to cure any case of reducible Hen ia with tj,elr Remedies. THE RUFTITRE PLABTES AND HEALING COM FOUND. This trnatment is endorsed by our best Doctors', Druggists, and the general public. Send Sets for free hook on Bupture or »sk your druggist for the Remedy. County C. A- R. Directory. RICHMOND POST NO 286. Meet6 the first and third Fridaj evenings of each month, i • > DB. S. F, BENNETT, Com. . WOODSTOCK POST, HO 108. morith!\ th<l Monday evenings of each ' B. N. SMITH, Com. M'NDA POST, MO- . iJSRSSSsar' *** V*. BUTLER, Com. , UARVAUD POST, NO 255. in**^t^h*mCo°nna»anii f°U"H MOND^ EVEA- DR. H. T. WOODRUFF, Com. Tlis number of pension certificates issued end signed during the week eiuling June 15, (Inclusive) 1886, was as follow#: Original, 97*2; increase, 612; re-issue, 13i; restoration, 43; duplicate, 27; accrued. 00; act of March 3 1883, 45. Total, 1,889. ' I he old soldiers will be glad to know that the bill appropriating $200,000 for the erect!en of a home In this State for disabled soldiers, passed the lower house of enr legislature. As the meas nro has al-endy beon passed by the senate. Gov, Ogle^by will promptly sign II. « The Conxion Committee. Events have strongly commended the National Tension Committee G.A.R., appointed at Denver two years ago. as well as the one of last year's Encampment. Their recommenda­ tions were reielved with great attention by Congress, and most or th«in «in- bodlid In bills which passed both Houses, and were only defeated by fortuitous circumstances. The rush of business l ite in the ses­ sion was all that prevented their flnal enactment into law. The National Encampment should stand (irmly on the ground m irkcd out by these Com­ mittees. No eflort should be spared to make up the Pension Committee for this year of< .•equally good meu. The thanks of all soldiers are due them for the ir eminent services. Appointment of Can. Rodgers. Last Saturday Gen. G«o. C. Rodgers, formerly of Illinois, now of Kansas, was appointed Chairman of the Board of Pension Appeals. Gen. Kodgen hardly needs any introduction to the soldiers of Ihe West,and especially those of the Army of the IVnuessee, of which lie %fie • t ̂ Torm* soldiers. He had just begun to practice law at the outbreak of the war and promptly enlisted in the 15th III., ot which he rose to he Colonel, and then was promoted to the command of a brigade, and was one of the very youngest Brigadier-Generals in the army. No man in the army had a finer record for gHllaiury than he. After the war lie re I timed ro the practice of the law and distinguished himself as a brilliant and lasci'iating stump- speaker. He Is a generous, warm- hearted man, and a favorite with all who know him. The soldU rs can rely ii|)on their interests being safe In his hands.--National Tribune. Gen. Rodgers was formerly a citizen, we believe, ef Lake County, this State, and there are many of the e.'d 15th III. boys residing In this and adjoining Counties that well remember their old Colonel, and are pleased with his pointfueut. ap. OBN. GRANT «T IIKLMONT.- 8TORT. .% aoon We were steaming down the Missis* sippl river. Opposite us was a low, yellow, muddy b*nk. Back upon the flat field was a log cabin or two, ths dreariest, muddiest, most mosquito- haunted spot in Christendom, it looked to us. "That," said the captain, "that's Bel­ mont. That's where Gen. Grant came so near being captured at the begin* uing of. the war." "How was I.? I've forgotten," said oue and all. " Well," said the captain, "it was ear ly In the war, Nov. 7, 1861. Grant was only a brigadier general of volunteers then. He had a few thousand troops with him. They were very green. They had only played soldier so far. Knew no more about, a real light than the boys who fired oft shooting crackers in a barrel «n the Fourth of July. "Ihe Confederate forces had their camp at Belmont. It was"on the river bank then, the town was, but th£ Mis­ sissippi river has gone away and left it now and cut into the opposite bank and made a be J for itself there. The old river dees that kind of thing fre­ quently--seems to take a dislike to a certain spot and leaves it. "A battle took place soon ftvrGrant and Ills boys readied Belmont. It was their first brush of war. and they fought furiously and captured the Confeder* ate camp. The enemy were routed. Grant always did everything h-i under­ took, you notice. 'But his new soMieis thought the work was all done, and, after the fight was over officers and men began to be­ have like a lot ot foolish bovs all to­ gether. The soldiers began plundering the deserted camp, and the officers made patriotic stump speeches to them. "Gen. Graut was disgusted with his new soldiers and ordered the enemy's camp to be set on fire to stop the plun­ dering. 'But in the midst of the fun some re-enforcements came up and joined the routed Confederates. They turned r- about, formed in order again and at­ tacked the soldiers who had just whip­ ped tliem. An officer rode up hurriedly to the genera] and told him the Con­ federates were after them. Then the geaeral said a very'good thing, which I hope you will remember. He an swered: "Well, if that ts so, we most cut our way out as we cut our way in.* "They set about in a hurry, for there was no time to lose )ust then. He gathered his forces and charged the enemy, routing them for the moment. But he knew his men must get aboard the steamboats In the river with all haste. He ordered them to the landing as fast as they could go. Some had been wounded, for it was a hot fight. He sent one band of soldiers out to gather these up and bring them Is while the rest were going aboard the transports. He had set a guard In the rear to look out lr, case of a renewed attack. These soldiers were so green th^n that they did not even lsnow enough to wait for order* to withdraw. When they saw that the main body of troops had nearly all embarked they just started to the river themselves, like free and independent citizens who knew It would be a good plan to get out of those'quarters. "Gen. Grant had everything to at­ tend to himself. He was the only one of them all who had ever seen a real battle. He rode over the ground as fast as he could, giving orders here, there and everywhere. It was just like him, doing everything tor himself without calllug on other people. He tries to do that now, even when he Is 111 and almost dying. The rear guard that he had set to watch things re­ treated to the boats. They actually went on board the steamers and left their general outside of his own troops on the battlefield. It was a pretty trick for soldiers to serve their com­ manding officers, but they did not know any bet ter. "The Confederates had rallied, and were advancing rapidly. Gen. Grant saw he must be getting out of that in a hurry. If the enemy knew he was the general they would capture lilra In spite of all he couid do. But they did not recoguize biro as an officer because lie wore a private soldier's overcoat. He wore just that same kind ot over­ coat all through the war. After Rich­ mond was taken, and after the surren­ der of Lee, his common soldier's over coat had become very Miabbj dingy, but lie wore It still. Here at Belmont Grant rode slowly over the fields down toward, the steamboats. He did not wish to appear to he tn such a mortal hurry, you know. It wasn't dignified. But presently the enemy pressed hhn DO hotly that he had to throw his dignity to the wind and rldo to the steamers as fast as his horse could gallop. The Confederates came very near captttring|him as it was. "He had no time to pick his road down the bank. He just rode lo the edge of the blufi and slid his horse down the bank upon Its haunches in the mud. The steamer's men saw thilr general come slidiug down the bank. They remembered what they were about enough to put a plank out for him. The enemy were by this time firing a shower of musket balls about him. In the midst ootids rain of bul­ lets he trotted his horse across the plank and barely saved himself. It ts not very common to see a man trot a horse across a plank on board a steamer But Gen. Grant did It that day. The plank was withdrawn Instantly and the boats steamed out of range of the enemy's fire. It was Gen. Grant's nar­ rowest escape during the whole war." Written for the Plat <. D8BHBIT8 DR( Now 21. BTL.L D., ST. LOtrijpjj DEAR BOB:--While staj tltie at the Briggs House, ia l made the acquaintanje of Mrs.| Johnston, a widow, who wat|? seated directly opposite me breakfast table. She was very ; conversing on nearly any sttbji late hnsband especially, and wi me no opportunity either to mi observation, or ask to be exc the plea of an engagement. saying that conversation polisl mind, and. If such ts the case, mf i must have been polished to a oil ous extent. One morning we wertoi ting at breakfast, being the onlf j sons seated around the little tat Mrs. Johnston commenced a coal tion that detained me about flf minutes longer than I could wish, »i which came near sending me to a dli honored grave: Lor me!" said she, "I wish you eouI^| have known Mr. Johnston.. lie was so'; funny. He said he wanted me to haitl engraved on his tomb-stone, 'Here llee | the humorous dead,' and when I did tfc|| folks was so scandalized I was most afeared of being lynched. I wi really. I well remembedli story Jol ston told of a blind man who was absent minded he one day commenced reading, entirely forgetting that hi could not see." "Stella," says he to me, one evening# I am sure you prefer* the lyre to ail other Instruments." 'Pshaw,' says 'I don't know as I ever heard ones:' What makes you thiirk I prefer it] "Oh,' says he, sort of winking 'because you chose me us your cempauion for life.' He went down cell tr just as quick j as he could run, and me after him with the broom, for I wac raring mad. Well, maybe he was right In calling himself a lyre, but I don't think so. During his last sickness he was a trifle out of his heat], and during one of these spells when we attempted to give him a rum sweat he thought we Intended to cro* mate him, and he acted like he hadn't j got no sense. He threw poor old Dr» Highly out of the window' onto * heifer, and the critter dashed oil wltti ; him down the road al a lightning gatt. I think she finally got rid of the Do0- tor by scraping him agin a tree. I surprised to see Johnstoi fanily Bible at Ike Fox. ay, AHIjar jHii It still. Here at vears. hut. as it u Sli-: Hints For School Director*. . Aii article In the New York School Journal, entitled an "address to Direc­ ted of Ungraded Schools," closes with the following sensible suggestions: 1. Fix a liberal compensation for teachers so as to ofler an Inducement to the best; then secure the best you can get for the money without regard to age or sex. 2. Keep a good teacher as long as you can. 3. Acquaint yourself with the best methods of teaching and school man­ agement, so that you will be qualified to judge of your teacher's ability. 4. Be cautious in listening to chil­ dren's complaints. p Sty nothing until you hear both sides. Presume that Ihe teacher is right in the absence of proof. 5. If you are compelled to criticise the teacher, do so with kindness an J discretion, but not in the hearing of the children. 6. For gross immorality dismiss the teacher promptly; if you have doubts give the accused the benefit of your, doubts. 7. If your teacher is lazy and Incom­ petent to teach or govern a school, that is sufficient cause for dismissal. It-be is dead, bury him. 8. Never shrink from defending a good teac'ier when, as will frequently happen to even the best; he U blamed for doing right by his Ignorant patrons. 9. See that vour teachers have good school apparatus; also see that school property Is carefully preserved. 10. Require every teacher to receipt for property and its condition at the commencement of the term. 11. Impress upon the mluds of the pupils the object of a school. Expel promptly the wayward and unruly who cannot be managed oy the teacher. 12. Whatever is necessary to be dotio for the good of the school, do cheer­ fully without procrastination. years, hut as it was, scriptures, which flattened a pan-cake. We finally got him to bed and tied him down >vith a clothes lino* . He said, when he got his senses back, that he was guarded by a lion, and$ tired as I was, it tickled me into tho amuse, and even the old dog's ceuter of gravity was shaken, and he joined in the chorus of merrimeut until his bones shook like beans In a can. I welfe- may say that my late Johnston waa funny. He started a little poem oueo - which was agoing to tell about somo boys stealing apples. But somehow ho never got no further than the first ;: verse, which 1 thought imbued with much poetic richness. I think It r; follows: The d ullest dog that e'er was bom, f Will quickly learn to tumble to The reason why the fence is worn Where small boys nightly issue thro*. He never go» no further than that, ! and he declared that even that efior|^ brought on an attack of measles, which' laid him up for nigh three weeks. But --oh. Lor, Sir!'* I looked up to scs what had caused this exclamation to ' which Mrs. Johniton had given utter­ ance. Her features were expressive of lerror and surprise. "Am 1 awake,'* t. said she, "or am I a nightmare? Tell ' me at ouce, for something 8o strange ^ has just happened to me." "Well," said' 1 I, "it's my impression you're awake. *: You're net given to somnambulism, aro i you?" "Yes," she replied, "alas, I am, But a moment ago my teeth were alt / solid, and I have just discovered thai { one of them is missing, and I don't ^ think I'm awake. I iuu?t see If I'm sf? i nightmare. I'm a going to throw thia platter at you to see if things Is what they seem, which I believe they ain't."1 "'« And before I could escape the heavy meat platter crashed dowu upou my ^ head, and I was shortly afterward con­ veyed to the hospital. I learned this ' lesson:--be careful how you fool around ^ pretty widows. ^ Yours Exactly, i „ Lomu.v <\ A Possible Danger. * He locked like a dude and apparent* :, ly had not enough strength to hurt a | fly; but he got lato a dispute with a"* *t sireet-sar magnate. The magnate bo- 0;| came abusive, and the augfy patron of the company suddenly shot out hi*; right hand and landed the magnate on his back. Teo much amazed to get angry, tho official ploked^hiassolf ap and fcumblf asked: How under the canopy did you got such strength in your arms?" "Hanging for twenty years on your street-car straps," was ||if chi^. ing reply. No charge for the m orat.--PMlxMt phia CalL Large crowds of ladlas visit Mrs.H» H. Nichols' daily, and most every one - carries away a box of goods. It p«f IN to keep a good stock aid sell nhtip.