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V ' " f t ^ - *'« •?3Sl2 AT tHk sWICCtt. ?T/;̂ BT OEOROK HOKT, ,4» v Hi firat tiling I remember was Carlo tugging *w*y, With the sleorx of iiiv oont fart in tola teeth Vallteg *8 mutcfa a« to »HV : *^Oo«ie, master, awake, «t to UN switch, ??(. lives now depend upon von ; 3%i»k of the souls in t iie coming train and the n* • graves you nro sending fheni to;, •],:! Tluiik of the mother whose bulio is at l»«t, think of the father and kou : ; Hiink of t he lover ami loved one. too; think Of | tbem do.-mod everyone uo,,Bes -•V' ' *6 fall (as it wero by your very hand) into yon ') fathomless ditch, | Utrdemi by one who should guard them from • % harm, who now lies ttt-leep at thtj ewi ch." I hardly knew what facial expression #0 assume. I dared not look angry or annoyed, lest he might encircle my throat with his maniacal clutches. I thought it wise to put on a serene, good- natured look, feeling sure the manly arm of Norman Leonard would protect me when I stepped from the car, for it was his custom to meet me when de­ tained till night, as there were but few and many vacant lots in the vicinity of our home, which rendered it extremely, gloomy a'.ter dark. As wo neared F--- avenue where I should leave the car, I 'Mi - .» *^gg3SXZ2S3?£Z?*n'm"< «"» »»<» V»* toto Ike totem •r* 2could near the wind dinmaUy uowUng and tbe j to see the familiar form I expected. The » ' * - i«„„ .v. nivsterious, unknown personage arose |>r I 4ould hoar the forest lt»ftY4<* rustlinc as the I _ 1 -- r ° •d . ... rustling *9 tbe K > • trees by the tempoat were fauttod. Bat what was that noise iti the distance! That I could not understand. , 1 iheaicl it at lirst indistinctly, liks the rolling *'of some muffled drum; * , nearer and newer it e4ni<* to U»e, till it made my very ears hum. What is that light that tmrronnds toe, and seems to eei lire to my Uratu? "Wh^t whistle's that veHi»g so (thrill)1 Ah! I ; . know now--it's the tr»ia. often stand facing some danger, and seem to , ; take roit to the place -- : also, and, preceding me, stepped from | the car and stood with outstretched j hand to assist me. I dared not do otherwise than take his hand, whioh I fancied felfc \ clammy even through gloves. ** I looked eagerly about, hoping I might see some one to whom I could appeal for protection. No one appeared, J place- nor was there a house within many 1 Stood--with this demon before os, its j b ocks to cast a friendly light. .mo K&? ginro.i liko tho eyes of some witr.u; j broken Jitiiglish. Though unable to Ssji V ' train was almos t upon mo before X remem­ bered the switch. . ' 1' ; 2 Sprang to it. seizing it wil<ltv. tlietr*tn dashed • • * -fust down the track- "IlMs switch resiste i my efforts; some .devil •" ; seemed holding it back. ~ I On, on came the fiery-oved uionstfer, and shot ..-JV •, bv mv face like a tlasli. „ ; }I ^*'6oned to the earth tha npxt utomfflifc, Hl4 knew nothing after the.croah. »ii> _ long I lay there unconscious 'ttpa iWp®>T, '" sible for me t o tell */i' , ' ' My stupor was almost a heaven--my waking al- i, most a hell; _ For I then heard the piteous moaning, and the shrieking of luisbauds aitd Wives. _ And I thought of the day we ad shrink from, - when I must account for their lives. Mothers rushed by me like maniacs, their eyoa »omi me suujecc. XDOUgn lie 8{ glaring madly and wild; excellent German, his words had Esthers, losing their courage, gave way to their grief like a child; •Children searching lor parents. I noticed as by me they sped. Aad lips that could form naught but "Mamma" were collimator one perhaps dead. My mind was made np in a moment; the river should hide me away. When under the stiii bnming rafters I suddenly noticed there lay A little white hand; she who owned it was doubtless an object of love TCtotme whom her loss would drive frantic, tho' she guarded him now from above. Z tenderly lifted the rafters and quietly lay them one side. Bow little she t hought of her journey when she left for this dark, fatal ride! I lifted the last log from o0 Mr, aad While Jy searching for some spark Of Iif», ; , yJElittied her little face tip in tbe starlight and I Recognized Maggie, my wife! • Ob, Lord: thr scourge i s*a hard one, at a biow . thou has shattere 1 my pride; Jfy life will be one endless nightmare, with Mag­ gie away from my side. How often I'd sat down and pictured the scene6 In our long, happy life. Bow I-a strive all my lifetime to bnQd.up a • home for mv wife; How people would envy us always,.in our cozy and neat little nest ; ' Hem 1 shonld do all of the labor, and Maggie j*, jshoald all the day rest; H w one of God's blessiiis»s might cheer us, low some day I p'rhaps should be sick-- But all of my hopes have Iwen shattered while * I laid there asleep at the switch. I fancied 1 stood on my trial, tbe jury and judge : I could i And e r f ' • l every eye in the court room was steadily fixed upon me. JUod fingers were pointed in scorn, till t felt my face blushing blood red, Aad tbe next thing I heard tbe words, "Hanged bv the neck until dead." 33>eii I felt myself pulled once again, and my . hand caught tight hold of a drees, Aad 1 heard. "What's the matter, dear Jim; you've had a bad nightmare. I guess t" Aw there stood Maggie, lay wife, with never a . Scar from the ditch. Id h. en taking a nap in mv bed, and had not 'tjeen "asleep at the switch." THE FOREIGNER, BT tOCISE GREY STIXT. V, The day was dreary, desolate and drizzling, and I was weary. O so weary, having devoted that whole miserable «day to performing a duty which, being •<rf an important character, could not be postponed; it was my last shopping day prior to the most eventful occasioh of my life-^feiy marriage. My thoughts "Were of my Eonneo. who to me was faaltless and, like fhe houses of Mon- •tague and Capulet, ours was-in close proximity, which greatly facilitated our uove aflairg. As I hurried from one department to Another of a large dry goods store, anx­ ious to finish my list of articles to be purchased and go home, for night was rapidly approaching, my "attention was attracted by ar man who, evidently wait­ ing for something, stood staring at me with a boldness that I had never seen equaled, and under which trying ordeal I became so embarrassed and uncom­ fortable I hardly knew what I was about. Finally he received his parcel and left the counter, and I then breathed «asy once more. But fancy my chagrin on reaching the door to *start home­ ward, to see the same stranger waiting there. His appearance was that of a foreigner--tall, broad-shouldered, with heavy brown beard, and a very strik­ ingly handsome man. As I approached his eyes were riveted upon me with a aad, bearching, inquiring expression which savored not at all of the "flirta­ tious glance." I could not understand such seeming boldness, A knew my plain face was Wry unattractive at best, and particu­ larly so then, as I was tired and jaded. After giving the stranger a dreadfullv ^fierce look, which I felt confident would frustrate any impure motives he might «litertain, Phurried as fast as I could, •actually running, for it was growing ^ "very dark, and an awful feeling of fear * 4irept over me. As I stood waiting for a street car, drying to dismiss the bold foreigner from aay mind, persuading myself to believe that in my tired, nervous condition I bad imagined his "staring" much worse than it really was, I suddenly felt his presence rather than saw him,for,without turning around, I knew positively he •was standing by my side. I did not deign to look tcyvard him, and was fairly trembling with fear. Soon; however, I (felt deliverence was near, as I saw the * Aright light of my car approaching. understand scarcely anything he said, I tried to answer him, all the while se­ cretly praying I might reach home safely. I was frantic with fright, and talked and walked faster and faster, he having hard work to keep pace with me. My belief in his insanity was strengthened every minute, as he gave me no sane replies. If I asked him a question in English, his answer was not to the point; when I repeated it in Ger­ man, discovering this to be his native language, his answers were-just as far from the subject. Though he spoke no bearing upon the remarks I ventured. To my intense ly, I soon perceived a form approaching. My eyes, with un­ natural power, penetrated darkness and distance and told me it was Nor­ man. I was to be spared! Oh, happy moment! Nearer and nearer he came. But oh, can you imagine my feelings as I saw him pass by without any sign of recognition. As he brushed by me, he gave me a glance-- only a glance--but in it I read--jealousy. Jealous of a madman. Oh, horror! Divining the cause of his actions, I quickly called after him: "Norman! Oh Norman!" I screamed wildly, but onward he moved rapidly distancing me and my escort and leaving me to the mercy of--I don't know who. At this point tbe climax of my fear was reached. The stranger stopped still, and, assuming an attitude which suggested the probability of his search­ ing his pocket for a revolver, stood earnestly staring at me. while he rum­ maged, first in one pocket, then an­ other. Finally, oh horror! I saw him draw from his pistol pocket something --oh something!--I dared not see what, but closed my eyes and screamed for dear life. This had the effect to bring Norman quickly to the scene. I can just re­ member seeing his facc as he reached me--then everything was a blank, i?or days I was unconscious; when I recovered the "sequel" to my experience was told to me. My screams had also brought my mother and others to the scene. ; They found me lying in Norman's attns. Near by stood the stranger in pitiable silence, holding in his hand, instead of a revolver or dirk, a harmless little speaking tube. My mother looked at him sternly, re­ garding him as a would-be murderer. But as she looked further her fierce expression liegan to grow milder, finally portraying supreme joy, for she recognized her long-lost son. The recognition was mutual, and there, instead of tragedy occurred a love scene. She joyfully wel­ comed my brother, whom she had' not seen for many years, supposing he had died in Australia. I, being many years his junior, could not remember him,and he was afflicted with partial deafness, whioh caused his queer actions. After making a large fortune in Aus­ tralia he had returned to Berlin, our old home, only to learn that his mother and sister were in America. Sailing immediately for the latter place, he had spent some months ill searching for us, vhen he met me by chance on that memorable shopping tour, and, on account of the marked re­ semblance I bore to our mother, he was firmly convinced that I was his sister. Everything was explained and we all forgave him. When, Norman and I were married brother Julius was "best man," and, by way of atonement for the fright he gave me and the jealousy aroused in my lover, he divided equally with us the immense wealth he had ac­ cumulated in Australia. A. Story of Stonewall Jack sou. An old soldier at the Capitol yester­ day told tnis story of Stonewall Jack­ son: It was during his valley campaign, and a battle was expected within a day or two, though Jackson's plans were so carefully guarded that not even his Ad­ jutant could guess them intelligently. This self-reliance was characteristic of Jackson, and his aversion of telling his plans was well known among his offi­ cers and men. In fact, it was his policy to surprise his own men no less than to surprise the enemy. Gen. Jackson was one of a group of officers, and another of the group was a Georgia Colonel who is still living. Conversation was dragging. Jackson was thoughtful and had little to say, and the effect was dampening. Finally, just to revive the conversation, the Georgia, Colonel asked abruptly: "General, will we have a fight to­ morrow ?* ! Everybody knew in an instant that the blunder was irreparable, and no- 4txe same car and seated himself oppo­ site me. f. was now not only ill at ease, fcut frightened in real earnest, for his s;,> "frild, set gaze, suggested insanity,, .and ^ ~ I felt sure he was intending to murder %ie. I felt safe enough while the car V was full of passengers, and at each '4^* "Street which the conductor called out, I earnestly hoped he would leave the ' < <4sar. But alas! one by one each oecu- |>anj stepped from the car until I " left alone with what I now iullj jsi.V Sieved to be a maniac. » I realized I must be brave, and tried •to apper very unconcerned, though I Was actually trembling like an aspen leaf, expecting any moment to see him <' »fly toward me, brandishing a knife or a 'revolver. Had he smiled, or in any •way led me to believe he was trying to was be­ ll... SNAKK POISON AS A MEDICINE. A Man Who Consider* Cobra Venond an Antidote for Cholera. An editorial on the experiments ma&£ in the United States with the venom of cobras and rattlesnakes appeared in the Republic last year, and it is followed by the receipt of a letter from Mr. F. A.i Perron*, of 3 Cooper's Lane, Calcutta, East India. Mr. Perronx writes that he has called the possible therapeutic effects of cobra venom to the attention of American and European govern­ ments, some of which, including the- United States, are now conducting ex­ periments in accordance with his sug­ gestions. He encloses a copy of a letter addressed to the Surgeon General at Washington informing him that cobra venom has been used in India as an antidote to cholera through hypodermic injection in small quantities. He be­ lieves that death in cholera is due to ,coagulation of the blood; that "pto­ maine," or a venom similar to that of poisonous snakes, is a normal constitu­ ent of the human blood, necessary to keep it firm, and that in cholera this constituent is separated and "localize}." causing death, which could be pre­ vented by the injection of the venom of such snakes as the cobra. His educa­ tion, he adds, is "entirely lay." He is not a biologist, and "the theory ad­ vanced is the outcome of purely syn­ thetic processes," suggested by what lie states is a fact--that oobra venom properly injected is ah antidote in cholera. Even if this is a fact, it is too extra­ ordinary to be accepted before it has been demonstrated beyond question, but, aside from it, there are points of great interest in connection with Mr, Perroux's theory of animal venom. Ex­ periments made in the United States, and heretofore noticed in the Me pub lie, show that snake venom when intro­ duced into thelluman blood acts as a* most powerful solvent. It liquefies or decomposes the integuments in the veins and arteries wherever it remains in contact with them in its undiluted state. This poison--or, if we accept the theory thus deduced, this powerful solvent--is certainly secreted from the blood in the snake, in which it may have existed in minute quantities in the same chemical form in which it ap­ pears--after secretion into the poison glands. This is not a necessary infer­ ence, however, as the secretion itself may be a process of decomposition and recombination, changing altogether the character of the substance itself. If this is what really takes place, Mr. Perroux's theory of venom naturally existing as a necessary solvent for the blood remains undemOnstrable. But if the venom is secreted without decom­ position and combination, he has sug­ gested a long line of "most important discoveries. -The actual basis of ob­ served fact for the suggestion is as yet very small. First, we have the alleged fact that the venom of the cobra will prevent death from cholera, and. eup- porting this, the fact that a subsitknee called "ptomaine," resembling serpent blood, been found iu uumuu uluud by analysis. This proves nothing, for the first inference is that this substance, when so found, is the result of disease, fermentation, or putrefaction, and not of normal animal chemistry. So little is known of animal chemistry and the possibility of astonishing discovery in it is so great that it would be absurd for any one, "layman" or biologist, to make any assertion of probability or improb­ ability in advance. It is not antece­ dently probable or improbable that a man will die if a poison or "solvent" corresponding to the poison of the cobra or rattlesnake is withdrawn from his blood. Such a poison may exist in the blood as a result of the healthful chem­ ical combination which perpetuates life. It may exist only as a cause of death, or it may not exist at all in "living" blood, but appear only after putrefac­ tion. Where so little is known prob­ ability or improbability scarcely figures at all on.any question of unknown fact. For all science knows to the contrary, such poison as that found in the glands of the rattlesnake may be an essential element of all animal life.--St, Louis Republic. regretted, thai _ I tbe invitation.4'*-- Frws, St usable to aeeepl Fanl Fionetr- But O, woe! The stranger also took realized this more than the - Colonel. Jackson turned quickly and stared full in the speaker's face. Then he slowly surveyed the Colonel from head to foot and back again. The tilence was painful. Colonel," said the General slowly, but not in an unkind tone, "can you keep a secret ?" / Yes, General," was the warm, if em­ barrassed, assurance, "I know I can, General. Yes, sir " "Are you quite certain, Colonel?" "I am quite certain, General." " Veil, Colonel," in the same qtuet, even tone, "so can I, sir." The Colonel's face flushed crimson, and there was ft deathly silence for a half minute or more. "Now, Colonel," said Jackson, with some feeling, "that rudeness Iget up a flirtation, I should simply have j fotne Ieellnf?> "that rudeness of mine /.regarded him with disgust, but common m® as. much as it did you, but I «ense told me that no sane man would Jru8^ ^ has taught you a valuable follow a girl for miles such a jstormy night, withput having ^received any~enconragement whatever. ;I could not credit the professional flirt with that amount of perservance and lesson. If we do have a fight to-mor- row, Colonel, your regiment shall have a chance."---Atlanta Constitution. A XIIVEBPOOL dentist extracts teeth, cleans them and returns them to their iookets to do further duty. They Split the Difference. Adjt.-Gen. Mullen was in a reminis­ cent mood yesterday. "I will tell you a little experience I had down in Louis­ iana in 1862," he said. "I was a mem­ ber of the Thirtieth Connecticut Volun­ teers. The opposing armies had come into pretty close quarters, and Confed­ erates, out pickets, stragglers, and skirmishers were around us and doing considerable mischief. Three companies of our regiment were ordered out on skirmish duty. We marched down, five paces a part, according to regula­ tions, into a perfect morass. The water was waist deep everywhere. "I wasn't very tall, and I found it necessary to hold up my cartridge belt to keep it from getting saturated. The Confederates were scattered through this swamp, and we took a number of prisoners without opening fire. I met with a misfortune. My boot caught be­ tween a couple of parallel branches be­ neath the water, and I was securely pinio/ied. My companions continued on their way, while I struggled hard to extricate myself from my unpleasant predicament. I finally pulled my foot out with a desperate effort, but my shoe was left behind. I could only secure it by plunging my head beneath the sur­ face of slimy, noxious, muddy water, but it had to be done. I had no sooner got the shoe tied on again than a rebel came in sight from behind some busheB. Intuitively our muskets were simulta­ neously raised. " 'Surrender,' thundered the rebel. ~ 'Surrender yourself,' I returned at the top of my lungs. "Then wo stood and eyed each other. Each had his gun cocked and levelled at the other, but neither pulled the trigger. By delaying, you see, each j was practically placing himself at the mercy of the other, or so it would seem. Suddenly the rebel's gun dropped and I brought mine down also. " 'See here, Yank,' he began, in a much milder tone, 'if I should shoot you my side wouldn't gain much; and, again, if you should shoot me your side wouldn't gain much. Now, I've got a wife and two babies over yonder, and if you dropped me they wouldn't have no­ body to take care of 'em. Now, it's a d mean man what won't split tho difference. I'll let you go if you'll let me go, and we'll call the' thing square. What do you say?' "Well, whpfc should I say? I walked over half way, and we met and .; Shook hands and yrted. A^xmt a year after a letter eanre to our camp addressed to 'Little Yankee that split the difference.' I h^d told him my regiment, you see, >ut not my name. The letter was a cordial invitation to visit the fellow at his home in Louisiana. He wanted me to see his family whose4 mem­ bers had prompted him to propose to *pUt the difference, and I hare always '.I . . r Pedis «r Orthography. t was riding through the country vest of Pekin, III., with an. organ and piano agent, when we came along to a school house one evening and found a spelling school in progress. We had three miles yet to go to reach town, but t£ie agent suggested iliat we stop for s while, adding: "If I can't spell the whole sohool down, then I don't want a cent.*: There was a big turn out and the master at once invited us to take a h&nd in. I had been there before and politely declined. The agent, however, went into the ranks with great enthusiasm, and, in the course of fifteen minutes, had downed all but twelve. Then I overheard growls and threats and mut- terings from half a dozen young men, and I knew that he was galloping to his doom. Five minutes later there were only six up, apd at the end of anothet five the agent - ard the belle of the school stood alone. The mutterings grew louder and more menacing, and I decided to slip out of doors. I was un­ hitching the team when there came a loud crv, followed by a succession ot crashes, and a crowd poured out through the door. The agent was be­ ing dragged by the hair of the head, and as soon as -well out into the yard they rolled him down a bank into the creek. I got out with the team by the skin of my teeth, and, reaching the town, sat up all night for the ^gent. He came in about daylight, clothing in rags, eyes bunged up, two fingers broken, and going lame in both legs, and as he fell into a chair he explained: "Before using and after using! I first downed the school, and then the school downed me, and I'll be hanged if I ever spell another word according to Webster in my life!" Washing ou's Tote*; In 1789 Gen. Washington made a tour through New England^ traveling in his own carriage. In tbe "Reminis­ cences of Worcester" a spectator de­ scribes his equipage as follows: "1. A gentleman in uniform on a beautiful dapple grap horse. "2. Next, two aids on dapple-gray horses in uniform. \ "3. Bay horses, with two negro boys as riders, the horses attached to a trav­ eling carriage, in which sat Gen. Wash­ ington. . . " "4. Behind was the baggage-wagon, with two bay horses, containing the baggage." , In every place through which the General passed the inhabitants of all ranks, ages and conditions testified their joy at beholding the man who had won independence for tiie Colonies, and was now the fir^t citizen ofHhe new .Republic. There was one exception to this gen- aral joy, if the statement of the anthor of "Glimpses of Life in Westborough" is correct. "He readied Worcester October 23, 1T89, the author, broakf«stod there, then went on by the hftUse of Gen. "Ward, still standing, a short dis­ tance beyond Pease Tavern. He had superseded Gen. Ward as Commander in-Chief, and the old General did not go to his dopr or look out as the Presi­ dent went. by.'f ( Of course it is natural to suppose that envy and jealousy were the oause of Gen. Ward's action, though it is not certain that that is the explanation. It is his misfortune if the world takes its dissent from /its verdict upon Washing­ ton as an exhibition of his own jpwr- rowness.--Youth's Companion. , K • She Hud Been to Church.' I have a friend who doesn't go to church himself, but sends his wife regularly. I dined with him last Sun-, day, and he took advantage of the cir­ cumstances to display her devotional tendencies before company. "What was the text, Sue?" he asked. "Oh, something somewhere in the generations ; I've forgotten tho chapter and verse. MrB. Hughes sat right in front of me, wearing the worst looking bonnet I ever saw on a woman's head." "How did you like the new minister?" "Oh, he's simply sUperb! And Kate Selvin was there in a sealskin that never cost a cent less that $100." "Did he say anything about the new mission fund ?" "No; and the Jones girls were rigged out in their old silks made over. You would have died laughing to have seen them." "It seems to toe you didn't hear much of the sermon." "The fact is, George, the new min­ ister has a lovely voice; it almost put me to sleep." A loner silence followed, during which George absently helped me to pickles and mustard, while his wife sat looking as demure as a saint at a. circus. Sud­ denly she exclaimed: ' "There! I knew I'd forgot to tell you something! The fringe on Mrs. Brown's cape is an inch deeper than mine, and twice as heavy!" My friend changed the conversation to the last hew novel. -- Lewis ton Journal. Electrical Eels. , These creatures are well known as among the curiosities of the streams of tropical South America. A more par­ ticular account of them, by an English naturalist who had much experience of their nature and habits will be of in­ terest. • - They are of all sizes, from a foot, to six feet in length, and are frequently caught on lines which are set for other fishes. They are sometimes eaten, but not often, though their flesh is said to be good. Horses as well as men, on coming in contact with them in the water, are not unfrequently thrown down by the shock. They are Called by the inhabi­ tants, "treme-tr©me." Iu rainy weather those who fish in these rivers often re­ ceive a shock, which is communicated alonfpthe moisture upon the rod and line, when one of them happens to seize the hook. I saw one in a state of captivity. It was about six feet long, and was so tame that it would allow any one to put his hand upon it, and would even slide for its whole length through the lingers. If it was irritated in the small­ est degree, however, by no matter how slight a pinch, it instantly communi­ cated a smart shock. More Than He Could Stand. Mr. OMbuck--Woman, you have dis­ graced me! Do you hear? Disgraced me! His Young Wife--Why, # dear, I am sure that it was;onlv 'ad irfnocent chat we had. I was not flirting; indeed I was not. ' ' 0 Mr. Oldbuck--Oh, I don't mind your flirting-. You can't help it. You are built that way. But you told that young sprig that I was vour father. -- Terre Haute Expr***, ' CMWied to the WalL There lives in Kentucky an old fel­ low known as Long Ben. One of his chief characteristics is his aversion to shpoR. When there happens to be a •%>w on the ground, he wraps' his feet in pieces of blanket, bnt if there be no snow, it matters not how cold the weather may be, he goes, as he terms it, "bar-foot." "Look here, Ben," said the County Judge, meeting him one day, "why don't you wear shoes ? Don't you know that the world is becoming so civilized now that every man is expected to wear them ?" "Wall," Ben answered, a man, I have hearn tell, was bom in the image of his Maker an' they haint proved to 'me yit that tile Maker w'ars shoes." "Oh, no, a man wasn't born in the image of his Maker, but was originally created iu His image." « *Wal,l, it's all the same thing. I no­ tice in the pictures that the ole pat- riarcks don't w'ar no shoes, an'I'm dinged if I'm goin' to do it, nutlier." One day Ben was plowisg in a piece of new ground, where the roots were so thick that he occasionally sustained the injury of a broken shin, but he did not mind this. There soon occurred some­ thing, however, that he did mind. He caught his big toe under a stone and tore off the nail. There was a negro cabin not far away, and he went over to see if he could get something to keep him from having the lockjaw. An old negro woman that heard his petition told him that she had the very thing. . • "You'se yearn o' dat wonderful 'num­ ber six, aid'you?" she asked. "Don't know as I have," Ben an­ swered, "but if it will keep off the lock­ jaw, bring it along." Number six is a liquid that some peo­ ple, who ought to know, firmly believe was invented by Satan. One drop of it, the old-timers declare, will burn a hole through a brogan boot. The old woman brought out the bot­ tle, and Ben poured u gill of the liquid on his toe. He started as though shocked, looked up at the sky, looked down the road, and then, with a whoop, leaped over the fence and struck out across the field. He did not stop when he reached a fence, but leaped over it and went on, shouting at the top of his lusty voice. A pack of hounds gave chase, yelping as they ran, and it was not long until every dog in the neigh­ borhood had joined in the sport. Ben kept on running--he jumped through a hedge, crossed the turn-pike, jumped into a stubble-field an^ran like a deer. The dogs caught him just before he reached the creek, hemmed, him up in a fence corner and were chewing his clothes when the County Judge, who happened to be passing, ran to his as­ sistance. * . "What on earth is the matter?" the Judge asked when he had quieted the dogs. "Blame if I know, jedge. I tore the nail offen my toe, an' I lioolleck goin' over to a nigger cabin an' pourin' some torment juiee on my foot, an' now all the rest is a painful blank. Say, air you goin'to town?" "Yes." "Wall, bring me a p'ar of brogan shoes, the biggest you ken find. I will be blame if civilization ain't dun crowded me to the wall.--Arkanxaw Traveler. . The Secret of a Long Life. You sometimes see a woman whose old age is as exquisite as was the per­ fect bloom of her youth. She seems condensed sweetness and grace. You wonder how this has come about; you wonder how it is her life has been a long and happy one. Here are some of the reasons: She knew how to forget disagreeable things. V She understood the art of enjoyment. She kept her nerves well in hand, and inflicted them on no one. * She believed in the goodness of her own daughters and in that of her neigh­ bors. She cultivated a good digestion. She mastered the art of stying pleas­ ant words. ' She did not expect too much from her friends. She made whatever work come to her congenial. She retained her illusions, and did not believe that all the world was wicked and unkind. She relieved the miserable and sym­ pathized with the sorrowful. She retained an even disposition, and made the best of everything. She did whatever came to her cheer­ ful and well. She never forgot that kind words and a smile cost nothing, but are priceless treasures to the discouraged. She did unto others as she would be done by, and now that old age has coine to her and there is a halo of white hair about her head; she is loved and con­ sidered! This is the secret of a long life and a happy one.--Ladies' Home Journal. Jane. Simmons, Butcher. rane Simmons is a little squatty mulatto of about fifty years of age. She was born and reared in Milledgeville, and was probably the first woman in Georgia to adopt the life of a butcher as her chosen profession. She began it, though, twenty years ago, and has made a remarkable success in her busi­ ness. She has been the first assistant of Mr. Dolly Ellison, who says she is the best butcher in the country. She can kill, clean, and cut np more hogs in a day than any man in Baldwin County, and she does it with such ease and grace that the entire populace are con­ strained to marvel at her skill. She enters a cow-pen, chooses her beef, slaughters it, and has it ready for mar­ ket in less time than it would take to tell it. Taken all in all, she is the quickest and best butcher in the coun­ try, and she would not exchange posi­ tions with Queen Victoria.--Atlanta Constitution. * Bachelors in Washington. •If I were a young bachelor--mors particularly a poor young bachelor--1 wonhi certainly live nowhere else than in Washington," said a society matron to a 'Star' writer the other evening. "In this town a young gentleman, unen­ cumbered matrimonially, occupies a singularly desirable position. Of course bachelors are in demand, socially speak- ing, everywhere, but nowhere so much as at the National capital. Thus it hap pens that any passably agreeable voutk is sure to have life made very pleasant for him. It is not accustomed to b< said here of a poor young man that he if a 'detrimental'--meaning that be it merely the fellow without the money necessary to render him an available parti, and at the same time sufficiently attractive to keep off practicable suitors. Indeed, as you are very well aware, there are scarcely any young men who go out in Washington society that are not poverty stricken. Therefore dis­ crimination on that score is out of the question; One must have young men at one's parties, you know, or else the girls would not have any sort of a time. The situation is. an unfortunate one from some points of view, but what art you going to do about it?" "Nothing that I can see," said the writer for 'The Star,' to jvhom the lady was speaking. "But I don't exactly se« why the young men should be poorer in Washington than anywhere else." "Don't 3 011? Why, it's very simple. In the first place this is not a town it which young men can make a living, unless in thft hopeless situation of De­ partment clerks, where they literally dare pot seek advancement beyond s certain point lest their places should be sufficiently desirable to make it worth while for the first new administration tc grab them. Most of the men one meets here, more * especially the unnjarried ones, are in Uncle Sam's employ. Then, again, the rich people who come here, while they alwavs bring theii daughters with them, very seldom fetch their sons--partly because Washington is generally imagined to be a dissipated city. So, to sum up, few young met come here, and those native to the place who do not go elsewhere to seek theii fortunes, usually remain poor--too poor, indeed, to venture upon matrimony. Thus you observe the spectacle of a so­ ciety in which the young women greatly outnumber the young men, and the lat­ ter are, generally speaking, not available for marriage. The anomaly of tiie situa­ tion is rather aggravated than other­ wise by the • fact that sc many of the girls are rich, either actually or in prospect, and, though things might be fixed delight­ fully by the rich girls marrying the poor men, things do not go that way. 1 have heard if said that $50,000,000 worth of prettiness in petticoats was sometimes seen at once in a single Washington ball-room, and I shouldn't wonder if it were true. But the men, poor as they are, are so few as to be piynd no v1irjfaI)(i the result i w Carpets, Iv ' . THE JOKER'S BUPCHBjr* A BLOWHARD--A hurricane, 'fv EXTRACTS from the treasury--Tea~ dollar note.*. A STEM P AREJTT--One who boots bis daughter's young man. . WHY will vegetarians insist that should not eat meat? EVervbody ought to know that it is meet that he should eat. VENUS now rises at a quarter befora seven in the morning. She evidently allows Apollo to get up and build the fire. "IT must have been dreadfully hard to wear these old coats of armor." "Yes; they have the appearance of hard­ ware." BURROUGHS (handing Mrs. Flapjack a check at the breakfast-table)--Hasn't Robinsion come down yet? Mrs Flap­ jack--No, sir; not for four weeks. "MONEY talks," of course; but a couple of nickels in the contribution box--from philanthropists in the front pew--make more noise than five dollar fiotes. • > STBANOEH--What a pretty church? Resident--That's a Polish church. It is? "Yes, but you needn't be afraid. The worshipers do • all their rioting among themselves. • A CHICAGO Conversation.--Jim-- Why, Mabel, you look just the same, though I haven't seen you for five years. Any entanglements? Mabels-Only a temporary one. I was married a~few weeks ago. "LOOK here, those eggs you sold zhe the other day were all bad." "Well it ain't my fault." "Whose fault is it?" "Blamed if I know. How should I know what's inside of 'em. I'm no mind reader." THE Usual Luck.--Jones--I had a dollar in the lottery last month. Brown --Is that so? Did you get anything? I never do. Jones--Oh, yes. I always do. Brown--No, you don't say. What did you get this time? Jones--A ticket just as usual. HUSBAND (a member of the Sportsmen's Club)--I see they have arrested some men in the East for shooting birds on the wing. Wife--Serves them right. The} should shoot them on the head or on the foot. You men have no idea how ugly a spoiled wing looks on a hat. BILLY--Some fellows don't know when they are drunk or when to stop. Do they, Fritz? Fritz--Dots vot I tink. But I always nose vhen I vas had enough. I yoost falls down. Dots besser. I drink nefer some more dot evenings, or I would get drunk. YOUNG JOHNSON (of Johnson & Co.) --Oh, yes, Brown is not a bad fellow, but he's terribly sarcastic. The other day I ssked him to fix me up a nice motto to go over the counter. What do you think he wrote? Chorus--Give it up--what ? "Hon® Policy.' 8HLEY-- How do you like Buskin's ng in the scene where he sees his id new Boots find Shoes sst Cash Prieew, PERRY =35= Mot a Rose (jteianlnm. Bridget O'Gahan sat in a rocking chair fanning herself with the tail of her dress. Mickey had just come up out of the sewer, where h® had been working all day, and sitting down by the side of Bridget, pulled off his boots and raised his naked feet into the folds of a cane bottom ohair, in juxtaposition with the moving garments of Bridget's dress. "Och, Mike, take your feet down; the aromony from them stifties me," said Bridget. "Biddy, my darlint," said Mike, "Oi know my feet are very shtrong to-day, but bear in moind, my dear Biddy, your breath is not the smell of a rose gera­ nium."--National Weekly. IT is a curious fact that there are no "swear words" in the language of the Indians. But the guileless aborigine never had anj bills to pay.--Terre MatUe Expre9jir:.~, . tell his tale and he said: It was away back the early seven­ ties. I was then traveling for a Boston school book concern and one night 1 brought up in a flourishing little town in Eastern Tennessee. I had never been there before, but I soon made friends with the landlord of the hotel, and when I asked him as to possible means of amusement for the evening, he said: Well, stranger, I can't say as there's much going on, but you might go to the spellin' school." It seemed that there was a spelling match to be decided in the town and I, full of foolish confidence in my own ability, attended and submitted to the process "choosing sides." It never oc­ curred to me that there could possibly be any feeling either between sides or between individuals as to the result. The building in which the contest oc­ curred was a tumble-down frame and log structure, the lines of which outside EUggested an imminent, danger of col­ lapse and within which a great fire in the stack cliimnev at the end cast the only light upon the bare benches save that which was given from the two candles burning upon the desk of-the schoolmaster, which was mounted'upon a low and rough rostrum. When I reached the building it was reasonably well filled. Great strapping youths in jeans or homespun oiiset girls-- many of them very pretty--in homespun or calico. The only man in the build­ ing, myself excepted, who wore a white shirt and "store clothes" was the lankv. schoolmaster, six feet and a couple of inches tall at least and graceful as a ten-months' old calf. Mind, I never knew how serious a matter "spelling down" is,and when they asked me to go in I simply went in, sure that there could be no danger that any of the rustic crowd could spell me down. The work began and boys and girls, right and left, sat down on words of three syllables. Soon there were only twenty of the original forty contestants ; then only fifteen; then only ten; at last only five. The words grew harder and harder. I saw obvious signs of discon­ tent. The girls did not like to be spelled down or the boys to have the girls defeated. The words grew still harder. One, two, three of the five spellers fell by the wayside and at last only two of us stood--the prettiest girl in all the house and I. At last tbe schoolmaster called out to me "hippo­ potamus." It was as easy as falling from a log until I felt a hot breath at my ear and a voice hissed': "Spell it with one 'p,' mister, 'nless you wanter get licked. That thar's my - girl; spell her down if you dare." I spelled it with one "p" and sal dows.--Detroit Free Press. fie Sat 011 the Fire. A householder discovered that a spark from a neighboring conflagration had fallen upon his own slightly slanting roof, and had set fire to the shingles. All the buckets and tubs had gone to the big fire, and there was Jio one to send after them, even had there been time for such a measure; but the man was equal to such an emergency. He rushed to a pond near by, and deliber­ ately sat down in the water.' To run up stairs and out upon the roof was the work of a moment,- and then he "sat on" the fire in more senses than ooa, and saved the house.--Argonaut. WHO can estimate the power of gen­ tle influences, whether amid material desolation or the moral winter of man's 1 *&$•••:• '• ive never seen such abject terror ex- |ssed on a human countenance. shley-r-You haven't? Well, you rht to see little Deadbroke when (meets his tailor on the street. "THEM city people," said Farmer liley, "think themselves mighty dart, but they are an ignorant set. J-instance, when I wuz ridin' 'long jieen street west last Saturday, I seen J?ig sign out, 'Great sale of Jerseys, HQ wool.' Ha! ha! What do you think' of that? They aet'ally think that wool grows on Jerseys! Why, any 6-year- old boy on a farm knows better'n that." A FATAL MISTAKE. Twas fatal! She -wilt ne'er foAjtvi, . , Such a miittke »B this; And I can never, while I live, Forget my cowardice;' 1 ^.'ellie and I together sat-- i Nellie-whom I adore; (I'll bet a new ten dollar hat *, She'll speak to we no morel} I tried to kiss her lips so red--j : - * Forever shall I rue it I-- ' "? "Just kiss me if you dare!" shsssMI.' And I--I didn't do it. Before They Knew It. Joseph Thomas,' a lawyer of Kenne* bunk, Me., at the beginning of this cen­ tury, was a man of considerable repu­ tation as a wag. A couple were anxious to be married, and as there was no min­ ister at hand, they waited upon Mr. Thomas, who, as a magistrate, was au­ thorized to perform the marriage cere­ mony. He was busy writing as they entered, but paused to inquire what they wanted. Addressing himself to the man, he asked if he wished to take that woman for a wife, and turning to the woman, he inquired whether she wished to take that man for a husband. Then he went on with his writing. The parties sat still and waited until their patience was exhausted. Finally, the man ventured to interrupt Mr. Thomas, and tell him they were in a great liurry. "Why don't you go along then?" an­ swered the judge. "But we want to get married first," "Married! You have been married more than half an hour." He explained the requirements of the law, and the couple withdrew, not without some misgivings, it is to be feared, as to the validity of a ceremony so unceremoniously performed. They had certainly been married in haste, but there is no record that they re­ pented at leisure. # She Saw Right Through It. "Mr. Sh&rpleigh," said that gentle1* man's wife. "Yes, my dear.* "You must think me o f p e r c e p t i o n . " . ' n * \ "Indeed I do not." ̂ "It very unkind and disagreeable of ; - you, too." ** \ : "What do you mean?" "I suppose you thought I wouldn't notice it." « . ,* ' "Notice what?" . ; ' "That you did nothing this morning •; vj b u t w h i s t l e ' W i t h A l l H e r F a u l t s I V V T Love Her Still.' And I'll say right here that I may have faults; I know it as well as any body; but I won't be still no matter how much you throw put hints."--Merchant Traveler. 7 1 ^ „ Double Chins. ' ̂ "My dear," said a blowative wife to her husband, "this paper says that a double chin denotes character and de­ termination. Now I'm glad that I have sucha pronounced double chin.? "H-m," replied the martyr husband. "The paper doesn't say that it is neoes- sary .to work all your chins all the time, does it, Mirandy?" "No, it don't, you old sap head. The advantage of having a double chin is that you can work one while the other rests. Do you catch on, yon old numb-' skull?" "Yes, I do, Mirandy, dear. But say, now, Mirandy, when are you going to give one of your chins a rest ?"--Dans- » , t %s! lip f t* i f : - * ! «SA.J6?J. '.-rdsM/Li -a . y * ) ags: