Editor and Pub. ILLINOIS iby had CENSUS TAKER. "Oot in; boys?" the marshal said the le"dy over the Rhine; ^ i And the lady shook hw flaxen head, A«<< <-«vjjly answered, "Neiftt" "Got any girls?" the marshal said TVthe lady from over the Rhine; X Ai*d again the lady shook her head, And civilly answered, "Nein.*', :> I, *11 uI: j0.1u.riuv dead/" tiie iiuj-jCuI j a To the lady from over the Rhine; • And again the lady shook her head. And civilly answered, "Nein." "Husband, of coarse?" the marshal sfcld 4 To the lady from over the Rhine; ; ' >* 1 And again she shook her flaxen head. And civilly answered, "Nein." ; " "The d--4 yon have!" the marshal said * To the lady from over the Rhine; : And again she shook* her flaxen head,"'""'"" And civilly answered, "Nein." *• ' h "®' "Now, what do you mean by shaking your head. And always answering 'Nine' T' j **Ich kann nicht English!" civilly said The lady from ever the Rhine. ' •: --John G. Saxe. A LEGITIMATE THEFT Most girls are happy when, in addi- , *J: Hon to having a home which is pleas- *nt, and a mother and father who are - ] IndHlgent, they have an admirer who is J}*.« young, good looking, interesting and wealthy, but May Vilas was not com- .. pletely happy. I§jk$f She not only had the pleasant home , and tiie indnlgent father and mother, ; - b*lt admiration, if nothing |Jf \ foore, of two men who were, both of them, young, interesting, rich and good >c •;looking. And these two admirers were what caused her unhappiness. ^ ^ ̂ Each had proposed to her and she had >, given the same answer to both, and as \ , she was not engaged to either her an- P'\' swer was not hard to guess. She liked them, but could not decide which she liked the most nor whether ^" • she liked either sufficiently to go «|Lf through life with him. f e g ; S h e s a t i n h e r r o o m o n e e v e n i n g a n d ,' mentally compared the two men. The j^V' . first she thought of was Henry Carlton. He was nice enough, he danced well, talked passably, had a good position f, , and was rather good looking, but the 4-',: ,, thing that weighed in the balance !$/against him was that he talked about himself on all occasions, and this did SSjf\ not please Miss Vilas. P'\ Herbert Willoughby, his rival, was no • more to her liking than was Carlton. For, though Willoughby had the same ||p' - superficial bids for favor that Carlton || had, Miss Vilas could not make up her ||v mind that he fulfilled all the requlre- v men Is of an ideal hero. KK' 1 "Well," said Miss Vilas, rising from * in front of the looking glass, where she had been unconsciously surveying her- ' self while she mused, "I'll never marry 2^ , a man who talks about himself all the s\v , time, nor one that I'm not certain I'll never regret accepting, and there's an hfT ' end of it" 1 "It's a shame." she said, with a stamp •^1 of her foot after a few moments pf deep •t- thought. "Here I've refused both of " them, and instead of becoming angry and going on about their business, they Y"*. . just go on and act as though nothing •fc-1 r ' had happened, and bother me nearly to -deatli.** | | S h e w e n t t o t h e w i n d o w a n d l o o k e d s out on the street, thinking all the time §1^ of the two persistent admirers who had |L , caused her such annoyance. « The snow was falling fast and the y!/./ ground was already covered, carriages pi;., * rattled down the street, and now and jpV'.' then people with coat collars turned up d hands thrust in capacious pockets ^ oould be seen hurrying up or down the ' , * broad avenue. While she stood there a carriage rattled up to the door of her e * house and Herbert Willoughby, one of the hateful admirers, alighted. She jumped away from the window instantly and pulled down the shade. "I wonder if he saw me?" she asked ^ herself, and then continued with a pout, ||||'-(-"I suppose, if he did, he'll think I was ji'Jf, ^anxiously waiting for him. Pshaw! 'Just like the conceit of a man., I wasn't waiting for him," she went on, as gh some one had accused her, and a contradiction was necessary. "I had forgotten all about the old concert he was going to take me to." But, though Miss Vilas had forgotten the concert, she was all dressed for an evening's entertainment, and her wraps were lying on a chair near the bureau. "I will be down in a minute," she said to the maid, who handed her Mr. Wil- loughby's card, and then she proceeded to don her wraps and go down to the parlor, where Herbert Willoughby was waiting. "My," said Willoughby as she entered the room, "what do you mean by break ing all established rules and being ready on time? Did y™ think that this thing commenced at 7 o'clock instead of 8, for you know it's only 8:30 now, "No," she replied, in an irritated tone, "I knew what the time was, and I'm always ready on time." "Well, then, let's go if you are ready," said Willoughby. "All right," said Miss Vilas, as she tarted toward the door. "Oh! but hold I must give you some letters to mail, of them is very important Mr. Iton asked me to go to a hop with to-morrow night, and I promised ite to him if I could go, and I must .t letter off at once." ran upstairs and In a few mo returned, carrying several let ters, Which she handed to Willoughby. "Noir, be sure and mail those before 10 o'clock, for they must be delivered to-morrow morning." "If they must be mailed before 10 ? o'clock," said Willoughby, "I'll have to „ - "H do It before we go to the Concert for § that won't be over until about 12." A. servant threw or^^|_, door and i* the pair walked dov;d|*iC*7»ow-covered Steps to where the^\Tiiige awaited them. the earring*. Herbert decided to commit a crii y He was going to rob ti|| mall and Jbe- tray a trust within then&tt twenty minutes, and Instead of bfelftg ashamed of the idea he was rather pleased with It H« had made up his mind to steal the letter that May had given him to mail to Carlton. He knew that she liked Carlton, and he was juat as sure that .she asked him; in fact, with that con- 8 celt that Miss Vilas had spoken of, lie thought that she loved him, and, al though she had refused his proffered hanfl and heart a short time ago, he thought that if she got angry with Carl son his chances would be decidedly bet* ;:ter. . JfcTe. A*eAaoiie«i it out that aj was to tell Carlton that Miss Vilas would go to the hop, Miss Vilas had told Carlton that he should not call unless he heard from her. "Now," thought Willoughby, "she'll be angry with him if he does not ap pear, and, although it seems mean, all's fair in love and war. I'll do it" At this moment the wheels of the ^carriage grated against the curbstone and the carriage stopped. Willoughby assisted Miss Vilas to alight and then said: "Now I'll mail these letters so that they won't be forgotten," and with that Herbert Willoughby walked to a letter box and mailed the letters". Miss -VilaS saw that he placed three letters in the box, and, as that was the number she had given him, she thought it was all righ't. : She was mistaken, though, for the square envelope addressed to Henry Carlton was at that moment reposing In the pocket of Herbert Willoughby, who was now talking at a great rate as he escorted her to the place of enter tainment The concert was long, and it was quite 12 o'clock when Herbert Willoughby, after seeing Miss Vilas safely Indoors, jumped into the car riage and, after lighting a cigar, or dered the driver to take him home. ^ "111 mail that letter to Carlton some day after I'm married to May Vilas," he .murmured,. and then- Herbert Wil loughby jumped into bed and slept the sleep that is generally supposed to come only to those with clear con sciences. The sun had been up and at work on the snow-covered ground for about four hours when Mr. Willoughby betook himself to his office the next morning. Instead of the white snow that had been on the ground the night before, he now found a muddy, slushy ground cov ering, which caused nearly every foot passenger to break the third command ment at a very rapid rate. Things earthly did not however, bother Her bert for he was thinking of Miss Vilas, and that subject occupying all of his thoughts, the ground became a matter of complete indifference. At the same time the object of Wll- loughby's thoughts was eating break fast and wondering what she would wear to the hop that night. She anti cipated a splendid time, and was going to look her prettiest and that, by the way, was very pretty. By the time that breakfast was over she had decided on the dress she was to wear, and so there was nothing for her to do but find an interesting book, read It and kill time generally until S:30, when Carlton would call for her. But Carlton did not call at 8:30, nor 9, for he had been tearing his light hair all day and wondering why he did not re ceive a note either declining or accept ing his invitation. <~ He stayed in bis room and hoped against hope until 10 o'clock, and then went off to the hop and was palmed off on a lady who had seen at least eight seasons, and altogether he passed a very disagreeable evening. Miss Vilas' evening was no better. She sat In the parlor fuming Inwardly that Carlton had not appeared, and at 10 o'clock, when she went to bed, she registered the solemnest of solemn vows that she would never again speak to one Henry Carlton, of New York. - Her anger, instead of diminishing after the night's rest had increased a great deal, and the day she passed was just as disagreeable as the preceding night had been, and in the evening, when a servant handed her Mr. Will- oughby's card, she took at least ten minutes to decide whether she would sec him or not and then decided in the affirmative. Willoughby was in a very*good hu mor that evening. With the freedom which is claimed by an old friend and a rejected suitor who has taken the thing philosophical ly, he accused her of being in a bad humor and surmised that 'her dress maker bad disappointed her. She attempted sarcasm and - wished inwardly that he would go, but though Mr. Willoughby knew pretty well what she was thinking about he remained and talked to her until after 10 o'clock, and then, as If struck by a sudden Idea, he ceased his bantering talk and asked her in the orthodox manner to become Mrs. Herbert Willoughby. Miss Vilas looked at him steadily for at least a minute, and then, as she after ward said--to get rid of him--she con sented. Willoughby could not see May for the next five days, but he walked around the town as though he owned it and his only trouble was that he could not look Henry Carlton in the face without blushing. For Carlton had called twice at the Vilas home and each time had been met with a sterotyped "not at home" that had told him plainly that he was in disgrace. Willoughby's conscience hurt him considerably when he noticed the de jected air that Carlton wore, and for the easing of his mind he decided that he would see May that night and tell her how he had robbed the mail. The call was made and Herbert avoided the confession until the last moment and then, as he arose to go, he told her the story of his deception. May listened to his recital quietly, and then, instead of laughing, as Wil loughby had flattered himself that she would, she grew very angry. "Well," she said, "of all the miser able, contemptible things I over heard, this 5s the worst And you have the as surance to tell me this and expect to be forgiven. , • the door. In a moment hG' on the sidewalk and paused to mm: ••oh, what an ass I was," he said, shaking his clenched fist at a passing cab. "What did I tell her about it fori Why didn't I let Carlton pocket his misery? "Well, I deserve it I suppose," he said, as he walked rapidly down the avenue. He didn't feel a bit bad be cause he had stolen the letter, but he did regret having made the confession. "Talk about confession being good for the soul," he muttered. "It may be, but It's awfully hard on the temper." And his temper was certainly not good at that moment He cursed the elevated trains for the noise they made. Tho clicking oi the oable, two uiuo'ij away on Third avenue, sounded to him like the chuckle of a triumphant rival. At his office the next day he earned the hatred of all whom he met and everything ^seemed to be at sixes and sevens. He found a relief in his room, though, in the form of a small square note, the handwriting of which he knew well, and when he had torn It open he saw an invitation to ea.ll at the house of Miss Vilas on that evening. And, best of all, the note began, "Dear Herbert" instead tof "Dear Mr. Wil- lmi<rlihv »» . fWeR CDLI "IS > 'JP loughby. He hurried through\linner hr.d took a long walk until the hour named in the note arrived, and then he hastened to the Vilas home. May was waiting for him in the pa*> lor, and Instead of wearing the frown that he expected, her face wore the sweetest of sweet smiles. Hg did not wait for her to speak, but rushing to ward her, clasped her in his arms and said: "May, can you forgive me?" She did not answer, and it was unnec essary. He knew that his forgiveness was complete. He drew the ring from his pocket and for the second time slipped It on her finger. He broke the silence, which lasted over ten minutes, by asking: "May, what brought about this sudden for giveness?" "Well," said Miss Vilas, sitting very straight in her chair. "I'll tell yon. I sent for Mr. Carlton this morning and told him what you had done. He got very angry about it and talked about how contemptible It was, and In con cluding he said: *1 wouldn't do such a thing to win any woman in the world/ and so I decided that any man who wouldn't do a little thing like robbing the mail to show a girl that he loved her was not much good anyway, and so I decided to forgive you." "Well," remarked Herbert after he had carefully weighed this oplnionaas to what was fair in love and war, "I'm glad Carlton was so conscientious." "Conscientious!" exclaimed May. "Why, that was nothing to hurt Any conscience. It was a legitimate theft" --New York Evening Sun. ' Another AfHcan Explorer. M. de la Kethulle de Ryhove, a Bel gian carbineer officer in the service of the Congo state, has just completed an important exploration Into an unknown part of Africa. Starting from the Ub- nngi-Uelli Ri,ver, and establishing posts as he proceeded, he first followed to its sources the river Chinko, where ho found the Sultan Rafay, one of the most powerful chiefs of the Niam Niams, who had formerly served under Lupton Bey, governor for Egypt of the Balirel-Ghazal province. With him he formed an alliance, and aided by him, crossed the watershed that divides the Congo from the Nile, and established a* post at Hoffrah-en-Nahas, the city of copper, noted for its mines, and situa ted north of 9 degrees north latitude, 400 hundred miles north of the Uelle.| He was in a region where no European! had penetrated before, and with the4 lelp of native caravans, which was of fered him, might have planted the Bel gian flag on the shores of Lake Tchad. He had reached, however, the boundary established by the convention with En gland made last May and since aban doned, and felt obliged to turn back His Colleague a Scapegoats General James Madison Leach, of North Carolina, was on one occasion associated in a case with Mr. Ball, a very careful and painstaking lawyer, but very matter-of-fact On this occa sion a point of law occurred to General Leach, but being a little doubtful of it himself he did not submit it to his associate. He simply just turned it loose on the judge. Not meeting with much encouragement, he involuntarily turned to his associate. But h<£ quick ly and easily read disapprobation and dissatisfaction in bis face. /So when, a few minutes later, tho judge blandly asked, "General Leach; d0 you think that can possibly be lafi 't" the gen eral, with a ChesterfieWian bow and an air of positive relief, replied: "I agree entirely with the intimation of your honor. In fact I only presented the point ,put of deference to the opin ion of my brother Ball." Instantly Mr. Ball, with a flushed face and a sotto voce heard all over the court-room, said, In an earnest manner: "Why--It- is--all--a--d--d-- lie." *l»y took tlieir oeatt, wl utter ttt j coachman had received his orders the door slammed and the carriage rolled away over the slippery ground. Miss Vilas talked to Willoughby on many subjects as they rolled along, but lie made no reply except to uod bis head and say "Yes" or "No." He appeared iu deep thought, and so he was, for in that short walk from the doorway to! looked ^ VY* " .ft1, " * • * 1 • *• < ij. Economizing Time. To economize time is a sensible thing, and yet there are occasions when It brings trouble, as in the case of a Mr. Johnson. Mr. Johnson's lawyer, call ing one day, found Mrs. Johnson alone find walking about in a state of violent txcltement. He asked what was the matter. Heymly answer was that her husband was "a villain." After a time, she added, with some hesitation: "Why, I have discovered all the love-letters he sent me were the very same he sent to his first wife." . M- T IS perhaps out of order for a woman to condemn her own sex, but It is none the less true when a femi nine voice declares that women as judges are not just, and that when they 'are called upon to analyze ' the frailties of their own sex they never take Into consideration all the heart ache and the pain, all the struggle and the weariness that prompts the actions,: that they cannot under stand, and, therefore, cannot rightly in terpret The martyrs of olden times wertj as nothing compared with the women oft to-day who go about with smiling faces, while underneath that calm exterior lies a tragedy that the world will never. know, and which frequently impels them to actions that In the light of cen-. sorious judgment seem unwomanly and positively Immoral. What right have any of us tp judge of the superficial character of anyone with whom we come In contact? We know ourselves that we carry about with us a double nature. What we are to one person we are not to another. The life that we show in one place is quite distinct from the one which1 brightens and Ulumines an entirely dif ferent residence. Which one, then, Is real? By which are we to be judged? And can a safe estimate be give|i of anyone's character from the transient gleams that are given in kaleidoscopic fashion, first bright, then grave and in finitely sad? • The woman whose life does not hold some sorrow is biassed be yond measure. Pew there are who attain the age of 80 who have not lived through ordeals ! Picture cords »ho<rid be ha noiu- tho color of the wall upon which they are put as possible, so that they may be but little seen. When one picture is hung beneath another the bottom one should be hung from the one above and not from the top; thus we avoid multiply ing the cords, which is always objec tionable. A good hue for walls where prints or photographs are to be hung is a rich yellow brown or a leather color. Lus ter to the black of the print or the tone of the photograph Is thus Imparted. The wall paper should have no strong ly defined pattern and should be of one uniform color, such as red Inclining to crimson or tea green. The center of the picture, as a rule, should not be much above the level of the eye.--Art Amateur. Mother's Birthday. , Mother's birthday! What a :; - Of memory it brings! . It soothes the heart and heals in part ! Life's struggles and its sting*. "Blessed be the tie that binds" Our mother's heart with ours, ^ -It helps us bear the load of care ; In sorrow's saddest hours. A friend is something all may hare If we but help each other; But friends are few who love to do . As much as God and mother. ' Then let us lighten every step' And fill her heart with gladness; And make each day a holiday, A stranger to all sadness. '^-Captain A. E. Ransom. v^ Wives of Great Men. Like the famous wives of the Bng- lish statesmen, Charles James Fox and Benjamin Disraeli, the lamenteJ Prin cess Bismarck was a true helpmeet and was a bulwark of strength to her spouse throughout their long and event ful career. The wife of Fox brought to the aid of her husband all the resources of a brilliant mind and rare personal beauty. Disraeli, after his first failure, Ctvtlimtffrtt tft-day FNltitajs to |K<SM the Apotfceoal*. of Warlike. Never before in the history of Chris tendom was the training of society for service in war so general and so sys tematic as it is now. Practically all continental Europe Is under arms. Every man who has not reached the age Incapacitating him for military ser vice Is a soldier. His first fmietlon as a citizen and a subject is to bear arms. Christian missions have succeeded la making little impression on the relig ions of the heathen world, as we call it, but Christian civilization has taught it the art of war, and Japan is riow show ing a proficiency in that art which en- fcUie'i U to .1 place amoti.s\ the great military nations of the world. The first selections for appointments By Gov. Morton were of the members of his military staff. During recent years now and large and imposing arm- orleshave been built in this city at great cost, and another is now under way. Military drill has been introduced gen erally Into the parochial and Sunday j schools of the churches, and the number of boys here who are now under mili tary training is thus greater than ever before in the history of this city. It has become a passion among them. Napoleon again looms up as the most poptilar Hgure of the day. His pictures and statues are everywhere, on exhibi tion in the shops, and the demand for reputed relics of his period is active. Both our army and navy are attracting an amount of public attention and in terest which they have received at no time before since the civii war. Con gress is asked to increase tne appropria tions for each, and if it grants the re quest public sentiment will justify and applaud its liberality. States are frightened from war by seeing that the whole civilized world is armed to the teeth, and thus is ready to resist at tack. Japan, having demonstrated its military capabilities, will be let alone by its oriental neighbors and compet itors for some time to come. It went Into its conflict with China for the pur pose of making its civilization doml- Dant in the East by the display of Its proficiency in the military art it had learned from Christendom, in our owm military schools, for example; and It has attained its desire. It has not been Christianized, but it has been made a great military nation, eyen when it is judged by the standards of Christian civilization. By force of arms it has made itself respected In Asia and Eu rope both, and thus has won a place In the family of civilized Stated.--New York Sun. CHINESE PRISONER^* THREE MILLINERY. Remains of Victoria Colonna Found In the catacombs of the Church of San Domentco at Naples were found lately the long-lost remains of Vlttoria Colonna, marchioness of Pescara, the Italian poetess, to whom Michael An- gelo addressed his love poems, and whose fourth centenary was celebrated four years ago. Her husband was the traitor Pescara, the general of Charles V. in Italy. "here Is your ring. You will please con sider our engagement at an end." And May Vilas, after returning the • golden circle to the dumbfounded Wil- i loughby, swept from the room with the I air of a tragedy queen. ' I W illougliby stood In the center of the j parlor, ga'/,ed at the ring, whistled, arnuse^ .tj^^wnc^t,, ftftd Eminently Fitting. Jk* a curious instance of the associa tion of names it is stated that there Is a postoltice In Virginia called Purga- tory, over which George G«4lb£i^;e presides as postmaster. ^ There is "one thing you may depend upon; if you believe all the women say 'ou can't believe § thing the men to which In comparison the stake would be a momentary pleasure. Gossip and scandal roll rapidly, away the founda tion stones of a woman's reputation, but would It jRot be wiser, would it not. be more l^atnan, to examine first the ln- ceiftive that prompts many actions that in tne sight of the world are tovT>e crfyl- cised and condemned? Charity cover- eth a multitude of sins, likewise a mul titude of faults, and the most womanly attribute that can be cultivated is char ity. Man's judgment is perhaps harsh, but it Is likewise just; woman's judg ment to hasty and likely to be mis taken. Venturing Into Matrimony. If a young couple be sure enough of their own ability to shape their lives according to their actual means in ven turing into matrimony they are blessed Indeed, writes Mrs. Burton Harrison under the fascinating title "Heigh Ho! for a Husband" in the Ladies' Home Journal. This is so rarely* the case that a young man now holds back to let thirty find him in possession of suffi cient Income to pay his household bills before he dares assume tl* privilege of a wife. There can be no reason against a girl marrying young if circumstances In sure to her a reasonable protection against the disheartening apparition ctf poverty shivering behind the lamps and silver bonbon dishes of her wed ding presents. The Bath. The women who say and think that a daily bath is ..debilitating should re member that all unusual exercises are • weakening, and that it Is only by grad ually accustoming one's self to them that strength is gained and maintained. Any one who fears the effect of a dally tub bath should begin by taking a sponge each morning. Then she should take first two. then three, and so on in Increasing numbers tub baths at night. She will have the uight's rest to recover from the effect and she will soon not i only be able to take a tub at any time j but she will feel actually uncomfort able without it Ho# to Hans Pictures. By hanging pictures low you Increase the apparent height of the room. Colored pictures should not be hung in hallways or on staircases unless there Is plonty of light for them. ! in such places strong photographs, (en gravings, and drawings in black hnd white go best V J A picture should not be hung front- one nail; the diagonal lines formed by j the cord have a very discordant effect Two nails and two vertical cords, or, ' .what, is far more safe, pieces of wire ; cordage, should be used instead of the was encouraged by the devotion of a mate whose vast fortune was not an In considerable factor in his subsequent successes. The uplifting stimulus of the ideal home life, she made for the Iron Chancellor was the Princess Bis marck's unfailing solace to her hus band's earking cares of state. She was of that noble type of womankind who lay all considerations of self and all worldly ambitions upon the sacred altar of home. What a monnme'nt to these attributes is Bismarck's eulogium to his departed mate: "She it Is who has made me what I am." Scrubbing in Gloves* A remarkably useful novelty in the line of household utensils Is the com bined mop pail and wringer shown herewith. The wringer consists of a I Are Loaded with Chains to Which Hung Heavy Stones. •. I had hardly finished my investiga tion of this weird and morbidly fasci nating picture when I heard a tremend ous clanking of chains over the stone paving. Three men were coming along, and another walked about twenty yards behind. All wore hobble-chains, and, in addition, each carried a large block of granite in his hands that must have weighed at least fifty pounds. As they drew closer, I saw that these stone blocks had holes In the center, and that through them ran long chains. Each chain was rove through ftnotlief' fastened around the man's waist, and, running free, was carried up and weld ed around his neck. The four men had hardly sat down when another, simi larly fettered, appeared, coming down the long courtyard. He joined them, and they sat in a row. I had not seen these fellows when walking through the prison. They pre sented the usual semi-ragged, unshav en, unwashed, hungry, and wholly ra* paclous appearance. Some looked de fiant others broken spirited; one look ed a coward and a sneak, and I said in my own mind that .be was the worst scoundrel of all. Still no magistrate appeared, and I had leisure to examine the surroundings. The materials for a turbulent scene were present; first the prisoners; and, second, certain instruments of a coer cive nature. There were four or five wooden col lars stacked like slates against a wall. A narrow ring at the edge of the neck- hole was worn bright and shiny. It ended abruptly in a ridge of black dirt, which edged off outwardly, and faded into tlie dull, dusty roughness of the main surface. A few knotted scourges «hung from a small nail close by, and also a piece of heavy leather like a boot- sole. The guide told me that this was for beating the prisoners across the mouth when they cried out too much during examination.--"Scenes in Canton," by Flonprce O'Driscoll, M. P., in the Cen tury. X One 0* • the 1>1 In tfc|MlB:est. The man in the corner of the car sest was looking so extremely despondent that the drummer, who was feeli<& pretty comfortable across the aisle, thought he would go over and cheer 1 him up a bit I "Excuse me," he said, sitting down I behind him and resting hls srms on the back of the seat, "you look lonesome and I feel that way, and I thought I might come over and see if we couldn't combine our burden and both of uA take a lift at It." The despondent one turned a pair of grateful eyes upon the Intruder* "Much obliged, I'm sure," he re-, sponded with a washed-out kind oi-'a smile; "but I reckon you can't do mo no great amount of good. . I'm chronic this way." "What's the matter? Sick?" "No; just kind of ma down atied*^ heel for lack of encouragement Every thing I lay hand to seems to go the other way. It's got so bad that I start up stairs sometimes and tfy^ I know I'm in the cellar." . "What's your business?" v : "Farmin'." -M- "Your crops must be 'backward, then?" laughed the drummer/ but ihe despondent one showed no sign of-ap probation of the drummer's wit ^ ^ "I should say so," was the ;exten^«^L his speech. M **Where is your farm?" , • "Martin County, Indiana." " "No wonder you feel as you do,"satd the drummer earnestly. "But I haven't lived there always," explained the despondent one Wtth ft faint smile of understanding. "Is that so?" , > "I used to live out West" the man went on to explain, "but bad luck fol lowed me there, too. Let me tell you one case for instance," and the chronic gloomer manifested more interest than at any time previously. "I lived out there where there are petrified forests way down In the ground, and as all my neighbors had good water from ar tesian wells, I thought I'd have one, /too. As a fact, the well was a necessi ty that couldn't be done without; so I borrowed enoufeh money to sink it, and went to boring on my own hook instead of letting the contract Well, I ought to have struck water in three weeks, Hbut I didn't.' After I had gone down about fifty feet I struck solid rock, and by jimmlny, I kept drillin' right through it for three months and it was the hardest rock you ever saw a 3-inch hole put through. I kept on working, though, till I run out of money, and then I mortgaged my place for more and used up that, and then I called to one of my neighbors to talk about it. He was posted on well digging and he went out with me to look at it He took up a handful of the borln's, which were as dry as if they had come out of an oven, ^and after examining them a minuter he began to langlt. it wasn't any laughing matter to me and I get mad and come back at him right smart." " 'How deep ha ve you gone?* said he. " 'Two hundred feet,' said I; *a hun dred and fifty of it through the solid rock.' " 'Do you know .what you've dodeT said he, laughing some more. < , i?;,: "'No,'said I,'what?' ' M " 'Well, you've struck the top of «M of them petrified trees down there with your drill and have bored a hole mighty nigh through it I shou&l say, if you've gone down through a hundred ani lifiy feet of rock/*' v The despoBderrt one sfgfcM T*refeujMl-_ , • "And it was a true bill, mister," he concluded, "and if I had just set that drill two feet further over In any direc tion, I'd 'a' got water easy in seventy- five feet and plenty of it, and had mon ey to spare."--Free Press. 'WlH •••• M Spa r-fM: .Wi'k. , S J ' "1" s j." Hi • ' ' >5./ - ' t?is WRISOEn FOB THE MOP. couple of wooden rollers placed to one side near the top of the pall. The mop rag Is slipped into the bucket and with drawn through the rollers. As the bauds need never touch the water, strong lyes or similar substances may be used, as well as scalding water. e cord -WVvv Five O'Clock Tea. It Is a red-letter season for exquisite 5 o'clock tea china. Grape scissors of sliver are In the form of a bunch of that fruit. New artificial flowers for house deco ration will almost deceive the florist Dealers say the pointed shoes have reached the limit and will now decline. Many grotesque styles masquerade these days as colonial fashions. Milady's dressing table articles must urorid; that i*die period of dotage*??; Followed Zaccheus* Example. It Is said that a well-known minis-' terial educator was in the habit of test ing the ability and self-possession of the theological students undter his Instruc tion by sending them up into the pul pit with a sealed envelope in their hands containing the text of the ser mon or address each one was to deliv er on the spur of the moment On one of these occasions the student, on open ing the paper, found this subject and direction given him: "Apply the story of Zaccheus to your own circumstances and your call to the ministry." And the student promptly delivered him self in the following way: "My brethren, the subject on which I have to address you to-day Is a com parison between Zaccheus and my qualification for the pulpft Well, the first thing we read about Zaccheus Is that he was small of stature; and I never felt so small as I do now. In the second place, we read that he was up a tree, which is very much my position now. And, thirdly, we re*d that Zac cheus made haste to come down; and in this I gladly and promptly follow his example."--New York Observer. Three Divisions of Life. When a little boy Sheridan Le Fanu wrote the following essay on the life of man: 'A man's life naturally divides itself into three parts--the first, when he is planning and contriving all kinds of villainy and rascality; that is *tlur period of youth and innocence. In the second he is found putting in practice all the villainy and rascality he has contrived; that is the flower of man hood and prime of life. The third and last period is that when he is making his soul and preparing for another He Nailed the Central Though^. Into a Maine .village where he liad preached when he was a licentiate with more hope than fame there oame a few Sundays ago an elderly and prosperous doctor of divinity. After the morning service an old, white-haired man ap proached the doctor and, holding out his hand, said: "Glad to see ye. I want to thankee for what ye said this morning, and te tell ye that ye preached a sermon hero ' ^" years ago I've never forgotten." Pleased by such remembrance, fbe doctor griped the proffered hand heartily and said: "By the way. what was that sermon, I don't seem to remember." "Well," answered the old man. don't remember the text, nor I do remember what you called the subj but the central thought was that the* ology ain't religion; no, not by a d----d sight!"--Lewiston Journal. •fc.'-l/. ^ ^ r :1 ' Home-Made Collars and Stocks, /y.- The fashionable occupation of the nil- ^ ment among women is the making of the velvet collkrs and stocks that aure Indispensable to every wardrobe. Stocks to match every known hue ahd every combination of hues are a part of the smart girl's outfit and now that she has found that velvet ribbon an swers as well as velvet on the bias, that- must be skillfully treated, she simply cannot make these dressy little collar ettes fast enough. A length of velvet ribbon, a flash of clasp or buckle, * stitch or two, and there you are. Given to the Church. There is a curious custom among the' daughters of the house of Ilapsbur^, whose br|dal trains, instead of finisfc- ~ ing an honorable career In the ball room, are bestowed after the ceremony on the church w^lfose sacred floor they have swept Only the^other day, dur ing the centenary celebration at Renn- V weg, the altar floor was covered with / a sheen of satin and silver, mellowaa by the breath of age, that had onde-^ 101 med part of Marie Antoinette's wed ding garment Wanted to Sample the Poorest. < Prahms dined one day with one his fanatic admirers, and, the latter, knowing the master's predilection for f.ne wine, had a bottle of renowned quality brought to the table toward the end ofjthe repast. "This," lie exclainj- "Pdr"*is the Brahms among my winesfe* H e guest sipped of it, saying: "Excel*: lent wonderful! ~ IWth'oven!" i.*'^'.-6%,.- Now briug ou yotip< i ;-:V •S 'j if4:, V r, -"'T, t M*5- ' r And Yet Growing. In 1850 the foreign-bom population formed 9.08 per cent of the whole; noiif :.E • r, i , *. 1 J> *'•' y.-VvX' •t-C t wp