The following text may have been generated by Optical Character Recognition, with varying degrees of accuracy. Reader beware!

TT* wstmmm The McHemy Plaindcaler Published by F. G. SCHREINER. McHENRY, ILLINOIS. The loafer is not afraid of spring fever germs. PRESIDENT 8ENDS FULL CAVAL­ RY REGIMENT FROM DES MOINES TO ARIZONA. It looks as if the harem skirt were to be hobbled. ' The trouser skirt Is not even on the Paris stage. popular The silk hat is threatened, threatened hats live long. but In catching a street car a harem skirt has a hobble skirt skinned a block. FORTY REBELS ARE SLAIN Insurrectos Attack Federal Troops in Charge of Prisoners In Chihuahua and Conflict Lasts Several Hou Officers Die in Bauche Battle. STORMS TOLL GROWS EFFECTS OF THE EASTER HAT MORE THAN SCORE KNOWN DEAD IN SOUTHWEST. Hundreds of Buildings Are Wrecked by Tornadoes in Kansas, Okla­ homa, -Arkansas and Missouri. There ought to be no trouble in get­ ting a little light on the so-called match t ru s t . New uses are found for radium. Is sumo radium. continually being All that is needed Somet imes when you think that op­ portunity is knocking at jteur door it turns out to be a collector. The meanest man has been found in Texas. He was arrested for stealing milk from an orphan asylum. A hospital physician declares that everybody is crazy now and then. So it isn't always the other fellow. An unusual happening is reported from Connecticut. A woman found $3,000 in her dead husband's pockets. To teach the young idea how to swim Chicago educators think is quite as important as teaching it to shoot. Washington.--President Taft has or­ dered the entire regiment of the Sixth cavalry, 800 men, located at Des Moines, to reinforce the posts in Ari­ zona. This order resulted from per­ sistent reports which came into Washington that another battle be­ tween the federal forces and rebels . was imminent at Agua Prieta, Mexico, j This step on the part of the presi- ! dent supplements his warning to the Mexican and revolutionary authorities ; that American lives and interests must not be endangered by unre­ strained border line fighting. It com­ plete, it is said, the administration's ; present program of precaution. The fact is emphasized in official quarters that the American troops in j the routh have specific instructions i not to cross into Mexico under any i circumstances. The officers in com­ mand have been ordered to preserve a strict neutrality and to see that American citizens do not expose them­ selves to unwarranted danger. It is confidently expected in admin­ istration circles that the Mexican gov- l ernment and the commanders of the i insurgent forces will heed warning from the president of the T'nited States and, as far as the exigencies of ( war will permit, choose their battle ! grounds with profound respect for the rights of a neutral power. N7o reply 1 has yet been received by the state ' department to the representations i made to the Mexican government in I this connection, but already assur­ ance has been received from the rebel commander at Agua Prieta that the Douglas incident will not be repeated. Chihuahua, Mexico.--Forty or more insurrectos were killed and more than 100 wounded in a battle fought be­ tween Sauz and Santa Clara canyon, about fifty miles north of here, accord­ ing to federal couriers who have ar­ rived here. The federals report five killed, but later developments may change the figures. A number of women and chil­ dren are believed to be among the killed. Coming across from Casas Grandes, on their way to Chihuahua with pris­ oners under Gen. Luis Valdez, the fed­ erals, followed by about 100 refugees, were attacked. Five hundred insurrectos under Generals Orozco and Villa had been Instructed by Francisco Madero to head off the Casas Grandes contingent and if possible capture and release the A New York office boy made $50,- Prisoners. The fight occurred on a 000 speculating in Wall street, but j ^c^d_av as_ th« P[iJ8°°ersJ.„lhack1^ they got $20,000 of it away from him The harem skirt has been causing riots in Rio Janiero, but Buenos Ayres appears to be making an effort to take it tranquilly. Now we are told that a woman's skirt is her crowning glory. All of Which Is our nutlou uf no place to wear a skirt. In parts of Nova Scotia automobil- ing is allowed four days each week. The rest of the time the roads are perfectly safe. + You can send a day letter by tele­ graph now, but old-fashioned people will cling to the "arrived safety" and "am well" formula. A New York physician promises to make bad boys good by proper breath­ ing. It is a far cry from a strap in the woodshed to a breathing exercise. A foot race has been arranged for one-legged men from Minneapolis to St. Louis. And thus the great work of the twentieth century goes on. the next day--and he is still fooling around in Wall street. In New York a woman is trying to prove that she loved a man and she offers is evidence letters in which she called him her "ugly monkey" and her "curly bear." It must be splendid to be loved like that. By an astronomer it is alleged that because comets are composed merely of dust collisions with them need not be feared. Just the same they give .. . . „ „„„„ - i six men, including Lieuts. Miguel Ba­the solar system the appearance of , . together by ropes, and the women and children refugees, weary from the long tramp, were scattered in a long broken line. The federals immediately responded with heavy firing and placed the pris­ oners and non-combatants under pro­ tection. The fighting continued sev­ eral hours and resulted in sending north from here of General Rabago with 500 reinforcements. El Paso, Tex.--The insurrectos have retired from the vicinity of Bauche, fcouth of Juarez, and the federals have returned to Juarez. The federals lost Heeding a vacuum cleaner. Wlnsted, Conn., has a fisherman who claims to have caught a pickerel because the latter mistook his nose for bait and jumped at it. It strikes as that said fisherman must have con­ sumed a vast amount of bait to ac­ quire s. nose so brilliant that a pick erel would Jump at it. i turini and Ambiagl Gimnez, and six wounded, including Capt. Porfirio Her­ nandez. The wounded were brought back to Juarez. The dead were left on the battlefield. WOULD IMPEACH GOV. 0SB0RN Under the new law it costs $10 to carry a pistol in New York instead of only $2.50. But those who expect to see the difference reflected in a de­ crease of shooting affrays will proba­ bly be disappointed. If the fee was a million, and It was not enforced more strictly than the $2.50 one, it would be Just as ineffectual. Sir Hiram Maxim is still singing the praises of that great American dish-- pork and beans. Some of these days the humble and much-abused pie will find an authority abroad who will sud­ denly eleevate it to the heights, and make us ashamed that familiarity and tradition have made us belittle the hid den sweetness and light we have with A jilted Brooklyn man is suing the fickle fair one for the time lost in courting her. She pleads by way of defense a woman's Inalienable right to the pursuit of happiness by chang ing her mind. In face of this consti­ tutional right the unlucky swain has no case. All the courts appealed to on this issue have hitherto upheld this right, which, indeed, antedates every­ thing but the creation. King Sodultch Choa Fa Maha Za jiravudh, of Slam, cables thanks for sending an American representative to his late father's cremation. That is nothing. We are quite willing, on gen­ eral principles, to send representatives to more cremations of oriental poten­ tates, considering that the Orient has such potentates to burn. But it Is to be hoped that Slam^e ^uurt etiquette will not require an American tongue to get twisted around His Majesty's given name. Michigan Executive is Censured Be­ cause of His Failure to Remove Prison Warden. Lansing, Mich.--Dissatisfied over the indifferent manner in which Gov­ ernor Osborn received the action of the house in adopting the minority re­ port of the committee that investi­ gated Marquette prison, it is said a majority of the representatives will favor impeachment proceedings against the governor unless he brings about the removal of Warden James Russell and the members of the prison board of control. This is the first time in the history of the state that threats of impeach­ ment have ever been made against a governor. The report adopted by the house set forth that Warden Russell had flogged men into Insensibility, had reecived tribute from the contractors who op­ erate the factories of the prison, and in one section it declared that War­ den Russell should be serving time behind the bars instead of being in control of the convicts. Governor Osborn says he will stand by Russell and declares the Marquette prison is the beet managed of any penal institution in this state. St. Ix>uis.--The most destructive storm here since the great cyclone of May 31, 1896, struck the city with terrific force causing three deaths and many thousands dollars of damage. A heavy downpour of rain was accompanied by a terrific wind, hail, lightning and thunder. The dead Include a driver of a team of mules, who, with his mules, was electrocuted by running into a iive wire; a woman who succumbed to fright, and another woman who was killed in a runaway. The horse 6he was driving took fright during the storm. Houses were blown down in the out­ skirts of the city, and !n the northern district an eight-story elevator, con­ taining 1,000,000 bushels of wheat, val­ ued at $750,090, was blown into the Mississippi river. The storm came as thousands were on their way home from down town. As windows In the street cars were broken, the excitement approximated a panic. Four negroes are known u> be dead, a number injured, one seriously, and three missing, following a tornado which wrecked the town of Valles Mines, Mo., forty miles southwest of here. Kansas City, Mo.--Although the weather is fair throughout the tornado swept districts of Kansas, Oklahoma, western Missouri and north­ ern Arkansas, the major portion of the telephone and telegraph wires are still down and only meager reports of the dAoth and destruction wrought by llie storm Wednesday are obtainable. It now appears that at least nine­ teen persons were killed. The list of injured will number more than one hundred. The monetary loss in Kansas alone is estimated to be in excess of $600,- 000. It is thought the damage in other sections visited by the storm will bring the total to more than $1,000,000. Hundreds of houses, barns and other buildings were destroyed. KENY0N IS ELECTED SENATOR Succeeds Lafayette Young, and Will Be One of Youngest Members in Upper House of Congress. Des Moines, la.--W. S. Kenyon was elected United States senator by the Iowa legislature. Voting on senator has been going on since January 13, and nearly 10(i ballots have been taken. Mr. Kenyon is to succeed Lafayette Young, editor of the Des Moines Cap­ ital. This action of the,legislature ends a deadlock which has existed since the beginning of the session and is a vic­ tory for the progressives. The election followed a stormy ses­ sion. Mr. Kenyon received 85 votes to 19 for Supreme Court Justice Horace B. Deemer, his Republican opponent, the candidate of the "stand-patters." The deadlock has existed since Jan­ uary 17, when the first ballot was ta­ ken. At that time Senator Lafayette Young, the present incumbent, was the leading opponent of Mr. Kenyon. but was succeeded by Justice Deemer on the twenty-third ballot, about six weeks ago. HILL TO QUIT BERLIN POST Ambassador to Germany Tenders Resignation and It 16 Accepted by Taft. Washington.--One of the greatest surprises of recent years in official circles here wai caused by the an- ncuncsnvent t licit Dnvid J&ync Kill of Rochester, N. Y., haB resigned his place as ambassador of the United States to Germany. The resignation was accepted promptly by President Taft, but In the formal letters given out there Is no intimation of the reasons for Mr. Hill's withdrawal. The ^ause is a mystery. In his letter accepting the resigna­ tion the president thanks Mr. Hill for his services at Berlin and says he is glad to know that he will remain there until July 1, when the resigna­ tion goes into effect. Unconfirmed reports of friction be­ tween Mr. Hill and the state depart­ ment were in circulation. Are Indicted for Lyrching. Hot Springs, Ark --Bee Murray and John Rutherford, former deputy sher­ iffs, charged with abetting in the lynching of Oscar Chitwood at the county prison December 26 last, were indicted, charged with murder. Dynamite Injures Section Men. Villa Grove, 111 - Oynarnile placed und»r the boarding cars of Italian sec­ tion men employed In the Frisco yards wrecked Ue cars and several men. Ltbor trouble posed to have bean the cause injured is sup- Second Tawney a Suicide. * Pierce, Neb.--William A. Tawney, brother of ex-Congressman James A. Tawney of Minnesota, com­ mitted suicide at his farm three miles from this town. A coroner's jury de­ clared the deed was committed while Tawney was temporarily inaane. He was the second brother of {Congress­ man Tawney to take his ow\» life. The first suicide occurred twelve years ago at the family farm m Saunders county, Nebraska. Violinist to Queen M Dead. Berlin.--The Lokal Anzelger an­ nounces the death at Lady Halle (Mme. Norman Nefuda), the noted violinist, from pneumonia. Lady Halle was bom at Brunn, Austria, in 1840. She was appointed violinist to Queen Alexandra <n 1901. tMVER HAS OtAHGE© His EATiMte PtACB 5(*ce MOTHS* and the CiftlS SAW THe SPSWQ MHUNgRY OPFehingi / i DOWT eeeMTb HArc Alt AfWTITt £ NOW ru SpSSM THIS Y&UKS IAOY HADC a ROUNt> OF 1ME SHOP wmoows ANP HASN'T B66H ABte To EAT ANYTHING SINCE VOX MUCH LUCK ws-n- V"?- \ . THIS PefrSO* D06SNT expect rt> gat much foe A WHILE WE HIT A gallant court In Pennsylvania V as decided that a woman with beautiful eyes can use them In any way she pleases. There is a large measure of prudence in the gallantry, for no court under Heaven could keep beautiful eyes from being used. Richard von Arkovy. a Hungarian baron, waB arretted in New York the other day for carrying brass knuck­ les. Evidently he had heard of the Drexel-Beresford fistic encounter and wanted to be prepared when he broke Into American society. 8tops D-al» in Futures. Washington -- Representative Ma­ con of Arkansas Thursday introduced a bill making unlawful interstate or foreign buying or selling or othf*rwis<? dealing in futures in agricultural prod ucts or commodities of any kind what­ soever. To Paint the President. Washington- Andres Zorn, the Swedish painter, who is now doing a portrait of Vice-President Sherman, will begin next week a portrait of President Taft Six Hurt in Cleveland Explosion. Cleveland, O.--Six persons were in­ jured, one probably fatally, when a 50 pound ammonia tank exploded 4n the basement «)f May's drug Bto.e on the public squa e. ^ SEVEN RESIDENTS OF DOUGLAS, ARIZ., WOUNDED BY MEX­ ICAN BULLETS. REBELS ARE AGAIN VICTORS Diaz' Trops Lose Heavily in Fight With Insurrectos at Agua Prieta --Mayor Protests to Taft. "THIS Poo* woman HAS MAroly SLe*T FOR A WEEK-SINCE N<* THC DISPLAYS D. A. R. FIGHT CLOSE CAMPAIGN FOR PRESIDENT GEN­ ERAL IS ALL ABSORBING TOPIC AT CONGRESS. LOOK FOR A "DARK HORSE" Contest Between Mrs. Scott of Illi­ nois and Mrs. Story of New York Promises to Be Lively--Forces Ap­ parently Even. Federat Official Is Dead. Aiken, S. C.--George S. Terr*, as­ sistant I'nited States treasu/«r at New York, died at York college here. He had been suffering for a week from an attack of diabetes. The body was sent to New York. French Canal Workers Riot. Marseilles.--Workmen engaged In digging «he Rhone canal, who went on strike a few days ago, clashed with the police. During the melee one policeman and seven workmen were wounded. Washington.--Washington is swarm­ ing with Daughters of the American Revolution. And they are busier than the proverbial bees. The twenty- fourth annual congress openfed here with Daughters from nearly every sec­ tion of the Union in attendance. Every hotel in the city is practically owned by the fair visitors and hundreds of private homes have been hospitably thrown open for the invaders. The delegates will be formally re­ ceived by the president and Mrs. Taft at the White House. The dele­ gates, with other members of the or­ ganization and of the Sons of the American Revolution, were given a reception by President-General Mrs. Scott. When the congress was called to order in Continental Memorial hall by Mrs. Mathew T. Scott of Illinois, the president-general, there began what is expected to be one of the stormiest meetings in t-ne history of the order. Questions of "politics" have resulted in the forma­ tion of factions, each with its own ideas, radically different from those of its opponents. Naturally, interest cen­ ters chiefly In the election of officers, with Mrs. Scott, the presiding officer, in the strategic point of the conflict. Mrs. William Cummlngs Story of New York, defeated candidate for presi­ dent-general at the last congress, will "carry the fight" to Mrs. Scott and her adherents She has raised the cry of "oligarchy," and declares that Mrs. Scott is and has been attempting, through the medium of the governing board, to "rule the society against Its constitution." As part of the cam­ paign of Mrs. Story's friends in her behalf, 100,000 letters have been sent to the members in the various states petitioning their support in the move­ ment to "dethrone the ruler and her clique." HINES UNDER FIRE BUSINESS RIVAL TELLS OF LUM­ BERMAN'S BOAST. Foss to Marry Miss Chapman. San Francisco.--The engagement of Sturtevant Foss of Boston, son of the governor of Massachusetts, and Miss Dorothy Chapman of this city was announced by the parents of the bride-elect. Packer Tilden Objects to Giving In­ quiry Committee Access to His Bank Deposit Records. Springfield, 111.--Edward Tilden, the Chicago packer, was a witness before the Helm committee here. He is alleg­ ed to have been treasurer of the Lori-^ mer $100,000 fund. After naming the different banks in which he carries accounts, he declared he had strenuous objections to giving up his records of deposits in the Dro­ vers' Deposit National bank, of which he is president. The questions of At­ torney Healy, conducting the examina­ tion for the committee, brought out that a subpoena had been Issued for these papers, but that they had not been obtained. Mr. Tilden was served with a sub­ poena duces tecum to produce the books and accounts of his bank de­ sired by the committee. Herman H. Hettler of Chicago, pres­ ident of the Herman H. Hettler Lum­ ber company, told the committee that Edward Hines declared to him he had elected Lorimer. He said he met Mr. Hines at the Union League club in Chicago May 20, 1909. "Mr. Hines was apparently elated and happy. He said: 'I have just had a telephone call from Springfield and I have elected our next senator.' Mr. Hettler declared under cross-ex­ amination that Mr. Hines had said nothing to him regarding money or the use of improper methods in the elec­ tion of Lorimer. 'I simply took Mr. Hines' actions as an outburst of personal vanity or egotism. He was bragging, more or less, a$out the election of Mr. Lori­ mer." M. B. Coan, Investigator for the com­ mittee, followed Mr. Hettler with a story of a conversation of Mr. Hines with several citizens of Marquette, Mich., in which the Chicago lumber­ man Is said to have boasted how he rose from a poor boy to a millionaire and crowned his career by electing William Lorimer senator. Mr. Coan declared that the Mar­ quette men who had given him the story had refused to come to Illinois as witnesses because of their friend­ ship for Mr. Hines. As a substitute for their testimony Mr. Healy read affidavits from Frank Russell, Robert C. Lowe and I. D. Mosher. The Hines conversation was supposed to have been at either Bush's saloon or at a hotel bar. Russell, Selby B. Jones and Russ Culver are said In the affi­ davits to have been with Mr. Hines. 'We have put Lorimer over, but it cost us a lot of money," was alleged to have been Hines' boast. Noted Train Robber Paroled. Sacramento. Cal.--Chris Evans, the train robber of Evans and Sonntag no­ toriety, was paroled from Folsom prison. He had been an inmate for 17 years. When the* news was told Evans he collapsed. Von Wltte's Health Falling. St. Petersburg.--Count von Witte's health is seriously impaired. His throat has caused him anxiety for some years and the trouble has now spread to the ears, causing severe head pains. Steals for the Ministry. Middletown, Del.--Horse stealing to get money to study for the ministry is the newest thing In Delaware crime. Ralph D. Anderson of Lincoln CUy WS.S arrested after offering to sell ft valuable horse and wagon for 966. Dtnman Thompson, Actor, Dead. West Swanzey, N. H.--Denman Thompson, the actor who made "The Old Homestead" famous, died at bis oountry estate here. Mr. Thompson had been 111 with heart disease and uraemia since laat month. Nobel Institute's Head In U. S. New York.--Dr. Svente Arrhenlus, president of the famous Nobel insti­ tute of Stockholm, Sweden, is in New York for addresses at Columbia uni­ versity. He will be the guest of Dr. Jacques Loeb of the Rockefeller insti­ tute. Prohibit Whipping In Prisons. Lansing, Mich.--By h vote of 73 to 8 the house of representatives passed the bill prohibiting oorpoi al punish­ ment in the prisons of the state. The bill now goes to the senate. Airship Grand Stand Bums. Minneola, L. I.--Fire destroyed a grandstand and several stands at the aviation grounds Thursday- The loss was 135,000. Captain Baldwin, the aviator, assisted 4n moving the flying machines to places of safety. Collegians Became Socialists. New York.--Reports received by the Intercollegiate Socialist society here Thursday show that the member­ ship of the chapters established in twenty American colleges has dou bl«d since January L Douglas. Ariz.--After an all-day bat­ tle, the most terrific conflict that has thus far marked the Mexican revolu­ tion, victory crowns the arms of the 1,000 rebels defending the border town of Agua Prieta. The desperate effort of the 1,600 Mexican national troops under Lieu­ tenant Colonel Diaz to retake the city- has failed and the federals have suf­ fered heavy losses in killed and wounded. So far as Douglas was concerned President Taft's demand that hostilities be conducted in a zone Insuring safety to the Ameri­ cans was utterly disregarded. Throughout the battle bullets rained ioceesantly in the streets and riddled the houses of this little Arizona town. The only reliable data of casualties that can be obtained on the American side of the line were seven American men and women have been wounded, most of ttiem while going about their business many blocks north of the supposed border line. The wounded in Douglas are being cared for at Red Cross hospitals, established for Mexican wounded. A protest has been wired to Presi­ dent Taft by Mayor McGuire as fol­ lows: "Six persons have been shot in Douglas during battle between Mexican federals and insurrectos. Battle still raging. Worst yet to come. Bullets falling all over city. Cannot something be done for our population? Signed, S. F. McGuire, mayor of Douglas." Simultaneously with this protest, Lieut. Col. William A. Shunk, com­ manding the United States troops here, wired a list of known to be wounded In this city. Public senti­ ment is mpidly reaching the danger point, and one newspaper has open­ ly called for intervention in Mexico. From four o'clock In the afternoon until late In the night it was not safe on any street in Douglas for people, mauser bullets striking residences, business blocks, smelters, railroad shops and cars and cutting wires and ricochetting from telegraph and tele­ phone poUis. And military authorities here say the worst is yet to come. In­ stead of fighting the battle in the des­ ert as they proposed the rebels in­ trenched fn and around Agua Prieta in such fashion as to make -hopeless Douglas immune from bullets, and the federal artny instead of attacking from the east or west as has been promised advanced from the south­ west, which placed Douglas much in the same situation as the background ef a targot. American troops did everything pos­ sible to protect the unfortunate Doug­ las residents. Spectators were driven back from the boundary line a dis­ tance of six blocks, but notwithstand­ ing all their efforts several persons were wounded. The inhabitants of Douglaa, despite the obvious danger, were not to be denied the spectacle of battle. They crowded the rodfs in vast throngs and darkened every point of vantaf,'*' throughout the long hours of conflict. That more were not wounded is surprising, but that any were wound­ ed at nil leaves Washington with i grave problem to face. So far as can be determined when dusk stopped J.he fighting the rebel loss was trifling, nonsisting of several score wounded and abtut 20 dead, while the federal losses arc estimated at more than 200. In all particulars the buttle was a thrilling and dramatic novelty in this war of oi.itposts. It began with the first rays of dawn and continued at In­ tervals throughout the day, marked by ferocious and determined battling on both sides and by a quality of valor not expected or hitherto displayed in this desultory internal war. The po­ sitions of the rebels throughout was that of the defensive. Protected by intn nchments they exacted a bitter price from the federal forces instead of an ineffective clash, usually cli­ maxed by hurried retreat. The fight was a standup battle on the side of the federals, suggestive of the old shoulder to shoulder days of the American rebellion. in an open strelch of desert, little like a theater, by the blazing days of an April sun, the two forces exchanged a perpetual fusillade, hour after hour, that marked up a conflict of' exceptional ferocity and determination. Throughout the night the Mexican troops had been encamped at Sulphur Springs, a wa­ ter hole five miles south of Agua Prieta. Under command of Lieut. Col. Porfirio Diaz, cousin of the presi­ dent himself, the troops had vowed to revenge the descent of "Red" Lopez and his command on Agfta Prieta. Deputy Sheriff Dies In Accident. Springfield, fit:--Charles Groves of Carllnville, deputy sheriff of Macou­ pin county, was shot and killed in this city. Groves was alighting from his buggy when his revolver fell from his pocket and was discharged, the bullet entering the abdomen. Senate Confirms Fisher. Washington.--The senate confirmed the appointment of Walter L. Fisher of Chicago as secretary of the lnte:-lor. The confirmation was made without opposition. Fire Chief Croker Quits. New York.--Edward F. Croker, chief of the New York city fire depart­ ment, tendered his resignation to taku effect on May 1. Deputy Chief John Kenlon was at c^ice designated by Fire Commissioner Waldo to be acting ehief of the department. Russian Painter Hangs Himself. St. Petersburg-- M. Kryzhelsky, tbo landscape painter and member of ^the Russian academy, committed suicide In a fit of despondency. The artist handed himself In his home. A Kidney Curt ¥aii Pan Bank On Prove the Treatment Before You Pay fpr It. Your Druggist Has a Free 8ample Paokage for You. Kidney diseases justly produce ln- tense fear in the hearts Of those af- flic ted with it, for unless treated promptly by the right method they usually end fatally. Every sufferer from kidney or blad- der trouble may thank science for the new treatment. Dr. Derby's Kidney. Dr. Derby's Kidney Pills are remark­ able. They straighten up lame backs every time and rirht off. Every man and woman can prove it without cost. No matter how badly or despondent you feel about your case, if you have back pains, bladder pains, Brlght's dis­ ease, diabetes, or rheumatism in any form, do not worry an Instant longer. Go to your druggist and get a package of Dr. Derby's Kidhey Pills--25 and 50 o»-nts, or direct from Derby Medicine Co., Eaton Rapids. Mich. If you want to prove first that all these statements are true, tell your druggist to give you a free sample package. Try them and be convinced. Too Fresh. "Will you promise to support my daughter in the style in which she is accustomed If I consent to your mar­ riage?" demanded old Skinflint, when Dobby made his formal proposal. "Well, I--I'll promise to be tole»- ably close with her, Mr. Skinflint," said Dobby, "but you know, I'm a soft-hearted cuss, and I'm afraid she'll be able to wheedle a few things out of me that you were strong enough to refuse her."--Judge. AN ESTABLISHED FACTORY Producing standard goods used by stores, banks, farmers and practically everybody, is sending its special representative to open a distributing office for this district and other unoccupied territory and desires a resident distributer with $600 to $3,000 in cash, earning stock for immediately tilling orders; we allow $100 to $200 month­ ly compensation, extra commissions, of­ fice and other expenses, per contract, ac­ cording to size of district allotted and stock carried; permanent arrangements; references required. If you can fill re­ quirements write promptly. "Liberty" Manufacturing Association, 230 West Hu­ ron St., Chicago. Character Told in Greeting. Joseph Simms, M. D., In "Physiog­ nomy Illustrated," says: "The man who gives you a warm, cordial, hearty grasp, looks you straight In the face, with a pleasant, open smile, and shakes your hand up and down, withdrawing his after a second earnest gentle pres­ sure, Is almost without an exception an honest, earnest and true friend. The man who gives you the wagging, hori­ zontal mill hopper shake, and lets slip your hand as if i^were greasy or oily, will almost certainly be found to be a selfish, cunning and deceitful man, ready to sell you the moment h« can realize a dollar." JUST THE WAY. She--Where has your papa been all morning? He--Developing a couple of nega­ tives with an Instantaneous developer. COFFEE CONGESTION Causes a Variety of Alls. A happy old lady In Wisconsin says: "During the time I was a coffee drinker I was subject to sick head­ aches, sometimes lasting 2 or 3 days, totally unfitting me for anything. To this affliction was added, some years ago, a trouble with my heart that was very painful, accompanied by a smothering sensation and faint- ness. "Dyspepsia, also, came to make life harder to bear. I took all sorts of pat­ ent medicines but none of them helped me for any length of time. "The doctors frequently told me that coffee was not good for me; but without coffee I felt as if I had no breakfast. I finally decided about 2 years ago to abandon the use of cof­ fee entirely, and as I had read a great deal about Postum I concluded to try that for a breakfast beverage. "I liked the taste of It and was par­ ticularly pleased to notice th&t It did not come up' as coffee used to. The bad spells with my heart grew less and less frequent, and finally ceased altogether, and I have not had an at­ tack of sick headache for more than a year. My digestion Is good, too, and I am thankful that I am once more a healthy woman. I know my wonder­ ful restoration to health came from quitting coffee and using Postum." Name given by the Postum Co., Baltle Creek, Mich. "There's a reason," and it Is this. Coffee has a direct action on the liver with some people, * and causes partial congestion of that organ preventing the natural outlet of the secretions. Then may follow biliousness, sallow skin, headaches, constipation and flnaj- ly a change of the blood corpuscles and nervous prostration. Read the little book, 'The Road to Wellville," In pkgs. "There's a Rmt son." Ever rrad the above letter? A ««w me ipiiran from tine to time. They *re genuine, (tm, ud full •< few latereat.