•I PAGE 8 - PLAINDEALER - FRIDAY, JANUARY 24,1975 day got darker and the weather lousier; I kept breathing ear nest prayers that everybody was happy in his home life, safe and warm, just where he ought to be, and no needin' nothin' from nobody. Especially me. And the phone rang. And it wasn't a wrong number. It's Woodstock calling, and they've got this lady who needs to be home in McHenry. Uh, exactly where in Woodstock? At the courthouse. (I brighten visibly. I know where that is.) And where, exactly, in McHenry? By the bridge. Exactly which bridge? (Last time it was a bridge four miles north of Fox Lake, and I was a flat forty minutes just finding it.) Just a minute and they'll ask her. Yes, it's the McHenry bridge. (Good! I know where that is, too!) So tell the lady to wait right there. It may take a few minutes, but I'll find somebody to come get her. Except, let's see, now. How is it you do that? Find somebody, I mean. I've not had to do that before. I've got this deal with a FISH friend. We cover for each other on transportation. I do hers when she's on phone duty, and she does mine when I am. Except she's out of town. Well -- that's what the book's Having made an earnest New Year's resolution about it, I have ju?t filled in my FISH-log for today: One call. One customer. One errand. Specific request? Pick up a lady in Woodstock and bring her back to McHenry. Per formed? Yes. By whom? Me. Person helped? I don't honestly know. I lost the scrap I had her name written on. It's out there in the mud somewhere, and even if I could find it in the dark and rain by now I doubt we could read it. I filled out the rest of the log, however. Got a feeling, though, that that slip doesn't quite tell the whole story -- and I think you might enjoy the whole story. You see, it hadn't been One of my best days, anyway, really. My frame of mind was kind of medium-miserable-to- wretched to begin with. I did remember I was on FISH duty. (I've been known to forget it, and to wonder vaguely why people are calling me up about these things.) I must confess, however, that as the RENT A CAR BEFORE YOU BUY IT Malibu Classic Coupe Now you can rent the current-model General Motors car of your choice at National Car Rental. Qtenting is the smart, easy way to get acquainted with that new car you're thinking of buying. Take one out for a few days. Put^it through its paces. See how it performs in traffic and on the highway. Then bring it back for a "deal" you can't turn down. Call now for reservations. AHEN IT COMES TO SERVICE WE MEAN BUSINESS. NATIONAL ICAR RENTAiX WE FEATURE GM CABSTAND "GIVE S&H GREEN STAMPS ON U.S. RENTALS. PAYTON Hwy. 31 South Wyaohl/ McHenry, 385-2100 U for, and there are all these names to call. So I'll just start in and call them. But I won't start at the beginning of the list.. I'll bet everybody does that, and those poor people probably get called all the time. I'll start at the end. No -- people have probably done that, too. I'll start in the middle, and go both wavs. Thirty-five minutes later, I have run out the top, and off the bottom. Fifteen phones don't answer. Two have been disconnected. Four are an swered by children whose parents are in Milwaukee, Elgin, Chicago, and Crystal Lake. Two are answered by people who aren't members any more Three people are in bed with flu, or married to other people who are. Two don't drive in the winter time. Four have jobs and are working today. One has a brand new baby she feels she shouldn't leave, and one is out on a FISH errand left over from yester day. It begins to dawn on me that all the people left in this whole wide world are me and a lady at the courthouse in Woodstock -- both longing to be elsewhere. But that's the answer! Why didn't I think of it sooner! I go get her, and have somebody stand by for me while I do. Only guess what? All the standbys in the world are lost, too. Even when I've thrown caution to the winds, and called people I know get called all the time. And any world that has lost track of Rosalie Doherty, Libby Pod- pora, Marian Barrows, Alida Wirtz, and both Stanges, all at once is plain coming unglued at the seams, and somebody important had better know about it. So I call you. And you're home, and you'll stand by for me, and what was I worrying about! I'll still be there within the hour, so pish, tilifry^and there, too. I fling on my rainj^coat and rubbers, and hop in the car, I put the key in, turn the starter, and -- Rur-rur-rur-rur... Nothing. Rur-rur-rur-rur-rur-rur-rur- RUR! Nothing. RUR-RUR- RUR-RUR-RUR-RUR-RUR- RUR-RUR-RUR-RUR-RUR! Nothing. I sit back, look up at a leering, lowering sky, and I say "Aw! Come on, now!" All I can think of is Saint Theresa, sitting in the creek where her donkey had dumped her, scolding the Lord, "If thte is the way You treat Your friends, it's no wonder You have so few!" Still -- it didn't stop Saint Theresa! "The engine's wet," I decide. "I'll juSt dry 4t off, or something." So I go back in the house and get a towel. I come back out and try to open the hood. It won't. I keep trying. And it keeps won ting. Finally I get down on my knees in the mud, and look up under it, and-- glory be-find the little thing that pops the hood open. I'm standing there, hanging over the radiator and trying to decide where's a good place to start mopping. And a friend comes by. LOOK TO MARENGO FEDERAL FOR HIGHEST ALLOWABLE INTEREST ON YOUR SAVINGS • K • I I 'I I -I I I ( ( t I ' I I • t t ' K •( < t I I •C ( • I •I t I I -t -1 I Rtfular Passbook 90 Day Passbook Certificate Certificate Certificate Certificate Minimum Ttrm None 90 dtp 2% jr. 4»r. 6 yr. Minimum EUlanct . $5.00 $500 *1,000. 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Where, even more un fortunately, I am still standing at the time. 1 feel a sharp blow on both knees, and my whole life flashes before my eyes. I also realize that all I haven't had, so far today, is two broken legs. I clutch madly at the radiator, the car jerks back, and I rock forward into the engine. Which, fortunately, still hasn't started. My friend is screaming at me from the car window. "Whgt the blank blank blank would you leave a car parked in second for?" I don't answer him. I don't dare. I just hang there, clutching an assortment of greasy cables, and think about it. I'll bet the Good Samaritan didn't have camel trouble on the road to Jericho, I think. And I know darned well he didn't have a helpful friend along to deliberately kick him in the shins with a couple of thousand pounds of car. I'll bet it was a warm, sunny day, and the inn keeper said, "You're a dear, sweet, kind person for trying to help, and you just sit down here and have a good dinner and leave everything to me." That's probably the way that was. And here I am. Out here in weather no self-respecting walrus would be caught dead in - and with a homicidal maniac having one of his spells. I disengage my clutch from the engine, and try both knees. Amazingly, they both still seem to be working. "Look," I say to my friend, "I don't want to take any more of your time. Why don't you go home and rest, and I'll call the service station to send somebody." I come back in and call the station. They don't have anybody to send, but why don't I call a towing service? I call a towing service. Nobody's in right now, but one fellow may be back soon. If he comes, they'll send him. I decide to call the courthouse and see if the lady has a friend over there she can spend the night with. Or a motel or something, and I'll pay the bill. Then maybe, if I get a good early start in the morning, we can get her home by Monday or Tuesday of next week. Line's busy . . . Waiting to try again, I notice among the grease stains on the cuff of my second-best blouse, a missing button that wasn't when I started. I reflect glumly that it probably broke off on the manifest, fell into the car- burundum, and will stick in the food line on the road to v Woodstock. Line's still busy . . Waiting again, I notice a can of 5-56 on my desk. (5-56 is a wonderful aerosol-can thing my brother gave me once, and it's a minor miracle and my favorite household tool. I use it on typewriters, and tape- recorders, and sewing machines, and record-players, and stuck door-locks. Anything, really, short of cooking.) Hope springing eternal, I grab the can and run out to spray it on something./ My friend has not gone home to rest. He is happily dismantling my engine all over my driveway, and "I think I've found your trouble," he says, waving something large and black at me. "Just look at this filter. It looks terrible." It looked terrible, all right, but almost anything in an engine does. "I don't want $0 take any more of your time," I said. A $52,00u,000 Mutual Aaociation wrving Northern Illinois tinea 1925. "Why don't we put all this stuff back in there, and -- Heaven be praised, the tow truck!" "I think I've found her trouble," says my friend to the repair man, and "She's probably not starting it right," says the repair man to my friend, and nobody says an- thing to me at all, so I come back in and sit down and stare at the wall. I remember hearing, not long ago, that one religious philosopher now believes that Satan is not only a very real personage, but that he's presently waging an all-out war on our generation. At the time, I considered that idea maybe just a shade flaky. But at this point in time, I'm convinced forlornly that if he is, he's spending the day in McHenry, and is sitting out there in my driveway right now laughing his ugly head off at those two fellows fiddling with my transportation while Rome burns at the courthouse in Woodstock. At very, very long last, a horn toots, and I rush out, and -- mirabile dictu!-my engine's running! I thank my friend and send him on his way, and I pay the repair man and send him on his way. I start to hop in my car and get me on my way, only I remember I don't want to lose my 5-56, so I hop back out to get it and -- it's not there. Now that does it. THAT DOES IT. I finally lose my temper, what's left of my disposition, and the rest of my ever-lovin' mind. I can see old Satan, plain as plain, squatting on my fender where that can ought to be. going "Hee! Hee!" "Look!" I screech, shaking my best ex-school teacher finger at him, "I've had it with you! All day long you've been doing your darndest, and you're doing just fine. But I'm going to finish this bit if it takes all winter, so back off, Buster, and get out of my way!" At that precise moment, the emergency-squad whistle wailed out over the city. "Oh, brother!" I thought. "Somebody has seen me out here giving Old Nick H--, and they've sent for the men in the white coats." So I leaped into the car and took off as though the devil were after me. Which he still was. Doesn't give up easily, that old boy. He popped up again when the gas tank showed all but empty, and I had to stop to get it filled. And he rode with me all the way to Woodstock, pointing out gleefully that the sky looked pretty bad by now, and it was probably going tornado like mad any minuftrArid that the lady had probably long since called a cab and gone home, since it had turned out that she was Mrs. Hertz, Rent-a-Car in disguise, and had simply called FISH because her chauffeur was napping and she didn't want to disturb him. So she wouldn't be there anyway, and I'd wind up going into the courthouse on a fool's errand, with rain in my hair, mud on my coat, grease on my shirt - and egg on my face. She was there, though. Standing out on the sidewalk in the rain. And somehow she recognized the car, though we'd never seen each other before- and scrambled into it almost before I got it stopped. Face flushed, eyes red, with damp little squiggles of hair drooping from under an even damper hat, she was probably the only other old lady in the world who looked worse at that moment * than I did. "I was so scared nobody could come," she said. "I'm so sorry," I began, "I had a little trouble getting the car started, and the line was busy, and ~" She reached out quickly and put one hand on my arm and Urge Retailers To Fight Inflation With Full Weights State Agriculture Director Robert J. "Pud" Williams has urged Illinois retailers to "help in the fight against inflation by making sure that pre-packaged foods contain the full measure shown on the label." the other up in front of my lips. "Don't say sorry," she said. "Nice people who come to help on such a day should never, never, never say sorry. It was just I was so scared nobody could come." "Oh, no!" I said. "Somebody always comes. Well, almost always. When they can." So we talked about that, as we drove home. How there are bad days, and all -- but there are still nice people. And how she wasn't really too wet, because she hadn't stayed out on the walk all the time. Just in and out, so nobody would have to wait, if they came. And it wasn't rain she was damp with. Just a little nervous. You know, how you get a little nervous some days? I knew. And we talked about the weather. And about nice people we both knew. And ahout radio programs that are good if you're lonesome. And how radios and newspapers and things do so much more to try to help people out than they used to. And we told funny stories, and laughed, and had fun, and enjoyed each other. And my cranky little Chevy engine m-m-m-m-ed along like a Mazda ~ full of power, and promise, and peace. Only over and over, she kept coming back to how some days seem so bad, and then somebody nice like me comes along -- And over and over, I kept saying it was nothing -- and praying inside myself, "Oh Lord, don't ever let her know what I've been thinking for the last three hours. And Lord, if you can manage to forget about it, I'll appreciate it." When I dropped her off at her house she stood for another minute in the rain before she shut the car door. I thought maybe she'd like me to go into the house with her 'til she turned on the lights. But before I could ask, she said one more thing. "I have not the right words to thank an educated person like you." (Oh, Lord, I thought, not that, too!) "But I bless you for such a happy time. With all my heart, I give you my blessing." and she went in, and I drove away. With rain in my hair, and mud on my coat, and grease on my shirt -- and a lump in my throat. As I drove back into the driveway, and got out of the car, my foot touched something that rolled when I hit it. I fumbled around in the dark and finally found it. It was my dear, darlin' little 5-56 can. I couldn't see Old Nick anty more, but I figured that-for today, anyway -- he'd finally given up and thrown in the sponge. So I came in and ate my supper. And wrote my FISH- log. One call. One errand. One customer. That I don't know who is. M.T. P.S. You can tear up that resignation from FISH I wrote under the hood of my car. And that list of forty-seven reasons why FISH can't last, that I composed on the way to Woodstock. I guess I'll try it for at least another month. I wouldn't have missed today for anything in the world. JANUARY "RED DOT' SPECIAL 20* Off All Stock Shower Curtains And Window Drapes R® DOT SPSS/US HAIf PRICE 3O*J0ff fiiB All Floral Printed Towels, Rugs, Tank Sets • Example Reg- Now-Less 30% Bath Towel 3.25 2.07 GumI fowl 1-55 1.08 Wash Cloth .95 .67 SPECIAL-DISCONTINUED FINGER TIP TOWaS 2/MOO .. Assorted Colors KITCHEN TOWELS Kcg Dish Cloth .65 Pal Holders .65 Apran 2.50 TON* 1-39 VISIUHJR BARGAIN ROOM FOR OIHER SAVINGS 3012 W. Rte. 120 - McHenry, III. 385-0048 Since October, more than ninety stores have been ch«H»ged with selling short- weight pre-packaged food, Williams said. The cases have been and are being turned over to the State's Attorney's office by the department's Division of A g r i c u l t u r e I n d u s t r y Regulation. Williams said that his bureau of products in spection and standards had found that about 20 percent of all stores they inspected were sufficiently incorrect in their packaging to warrant notification of the State's At torney's office in the ap propriate county. He said that so far -about a dozen counties were involved. Many com plaints came to the depart ment's attention through call from consumers, Williams said. T h e « d i r e c t o r s a i d t h a t although the shortages usually have not been great and are virtually impossible to notice without re-weighing, they still add up to a lot over a period of time. • "Half-ounce shortages on 200 pieces of pre-packaged food a day could add up to $2,500 worth of meat by the end of a year at today's prices," Williams said. Under Illinois law, the Department of Agriculture is the official keeper of weights and measures and is charged with checking the accuracy of all measuring devices within the state which are not shocked by municipal offices. The department also calibrates the standards used by the municipal inspectors in larger cities. In areas without the city scale inspectors, the depart ment inspects establishments doing business by weight or volume about once a year, Williams said. "With the increasing need for economy and value, it is more and more important to guard against short-weighing of pre packaged food and com modities. Under Illinois law, short-weighing is as much a crime as shoplifting or purse- snatching," Williams said. Ringwood News 653-9008 653-9262 728-0295 n Bruce Family Honors McPhersons On Anniversary Ma and Pa Bruce, along with several of their children, at tended the twenty-fifth wedding anniversary of Lois and LeRoy McPherson at Downers Grove, on Saturday, Jan. 11. Those who made the trip to Downers Grove were Roger and Bonnie Petzka, Wesley and Wanda Bruce, Chuck and Bev Ackerman, Judy and Kenny Beck, Lennard and Phyllis Ackerman, and Luke, Mooch and Ralph Ackerman also attended with their parents. A good time was had by all and the McPhersons were happy so many of the Bruce clan at tended. BIRTHDAY DINNER A birthday dinner was the special reason for getting together at the home of Walt and Alice Mae Wilcox in Woodstock. The guests of honor were Marcey Erwin whose special day was Jan. 13 and Patti Miller who celebrated on Jan. 18. Those attending were Mabel Thomas, Sue and Ed Erwin and children, and Bob and Sue Low and Bobbie of McHenry. Pam and Dan Kehoe were down from Elkhorn, Wis. Of course Patti was there with sons, Scott and Lee Miller. Walt and Doris Low and sons, Tom and Ray, and friend, Cindy Haywood. CANASTA CLUB The canasta players u et at Art and Katy Christopher's home Saturday night with high scores going to Bill and Shirley Cristy. ATTENDS BIRTHDAY PARTY Last Wednesday Mrs. Nellie Hepburn spent a most en joyable day with Mrs. Rose (John) Neuharth on the oc casion of Mrs. Neuharth's birthday. A lovely salad lun- cheo was served to the guests, with lots of delicious goodies and a birthday cake. Among those attending were Mrs. Janet Seimien, Mrs. Annette Nagele, Mrs. Alma Brushaber A1; of McHenry and Mrs. Ma rion Tobin of Wonder Lake. Mrs. Neuharth was honored with gifts from her friends. ABOUT TOWN Mr. and Mrs. Russell Soddy spent last weekend at the Brennan-Hepburn home. On . Sunday afternoon they with Mrs. Hepburn visited Mr. and Mrs. Henry Aissen of Wonder Lake and in the evening called on Mr. and Mrs. Charlie Secord of McHenry. Mrs. Mary Schaeffer of McHenry recently visited Aunt Nellie. It will be fun for Aunt Nellie to send letters to her son, John Blackman of Goodland, Fla. Johnnie sent a package to the house and in it was a tape recorder. It sure beats writing letters, as your reporter well knows. One of your reporters has been using one for years for corresponding with her in-laws. Friday, Jan. 17, found Pam Kehoe having lunch with Pam's mom, Doris Low, then Pam visited sister Sue Erwin and when Donna Lynn and Eddie got home from school she took Donna, Eddie and Marcey home to stay with her until Sunday when the group got together for dinner at Auntie ' Alice's.1 That was quite a vacation for the kids, also Mom and Dad Erwin. BIRTHDAYS We all wish a very happy birthday to Colleen Tonyan and Tom Kane on Jan. 25, the twenty-sixth is the special /day for Anza Visconti, Wesley Bruce and Otto Mergle. Donna Barker has her day on Jan. 27 with Bob Malsch and Rose Visconti sharing Jan. 28. Happy birthday to Lisa Ackerman and John Hogan, Jr., on Jan. 30 and to Barbara Nelson on Jan. 31. Happy birthday to all of you and many, many more of them. 'Tis great since we have the church calendars because it has helped our birthday list grow, so we can wish so many more of you a happy birthday. ANNIVERSARIES The month of January has been a slow month for an niversaries but we*do have two couples who chose the cold month of January to be married. Happy anniversary to Mary (Hogan) and Earl Son- nemaker on Jan. 26 and to Bill and Shirley Cristy on Jan. 28. A foolish idea a day keeps the mind working at least. Henry Hock has 17 reasons why you should come to us for income tax help. Reason 1. We are income tax specialists. We ask the right auestions. We dig for every honest deduction. We want to leave no stone unturned to make sure you ~ pay the smallest legitimate tax. T H E I N C O M E T A X P E O P L E 3911 W. MAIN Op«n 9-6 Mon • Fri. 9-5 Sat. 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