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www.insideHALTON.com | OAKVILLE BEAVER | Thursday, April 16, 2015 | 22 continued from p.20 hometown favourites, Wilco. In subsequent years, I endured the good, the bad, and the ugly of outdoor music festivals. The good: seeing bands like The Gaslight Anthem, Green Day, Death Cab for Cutie, et al. The bad: suffering near-sunstroke one year, getting soaked and chilled to the bone in torrential rain the next year. The ugly: well, there was that guy Realizing the diminishing returns of the outdoor festival life who kind of hurled on my shoe. Ah, but it all goes with outdoor festival life. A life made for the young. Or, at least, the young at heart. Or, at very least, the pleasantly oblivious. In time, the outdoor festival life became all about diminishing returns. About weighing whether the reward could possibly outweigh the headaches and hassles. Ah, who am I kidding? It was really about deciding whether I still had the stomach to endure epic lineups just to use a nasty porta-potty , or had my needs evolved? Become more re ned, more civil, more... sanitary. It was my wife who helped me see the light. Late one afternoon, as we were inching along in a mile-long portaloo lineup -- being beaten by heat, bothered by folks, feeling annoyed and every inch our age -- my wife casually reminded me of the restaurant she'd espied just down the road on the way into the venue. And then the wily temptress seduced me, saying: "You know, we could be inside that air-conditioned restaurant having a tall glass of chilled wine and using a real bathroom in, like, ve minutes." Goodbye festival. Hello restaurant. Yep, my porta-potty days are behind me. -- Contact Andy Juniper at ajjuniper@gmail. com, Facebook or Twitter @thesportjesters. Leaky Basement? Call Us! · Crack Injection Repair Specialist · Wise Dry Interior Drain Systems · Lifetime Fully Transferrable Warranty Because family matters Let us take care of you Oakview Funeral Home has been serving the Oakville community for over 30 years. We are proud community supporters and will assist your family in creating a highly personalized service to suit your taste and budget. Oakview Funeral Home serves one family at a time and offers competitive prices and superior service. Get your FREE Planning Kit! Call Dawn Spencer today: Call Us... 905-510-9739 Professional, Cost Effective Solutions for Wet wayne@wisecracks.com Basements w w w. H a l t o n Wi s e C ra c k s. co m 905-842-2252 Look for us on Facebook Visit www.oakviewfuneral.ca for a virtual tour of our funeral home. by Arbor Memorial 56 Lakeshore Road, W., Oakville Arbor Memorial Inc. Oakview Funeral Home Family Owned. Proudly Canadian. Right Hearing Aid... Right Price... Right Now! Special APR MAY ONLY pricing on our most popular hearing aids $395 per hearing aid or $790 for two ENTRY LEVEL as low as $695 per hearing aid or $1390 for two MID LEVEL as low as $995 per hearing aid or $1990 for two ADVANCED as low as At ListenUP! Canada, we believe EVERY Canadian who could be helped by wearing hearing aids should have access to them. So we've crafted special packages to fit both your budget and your lifestyle. We accept government and private funding programs, and we offer interest-free financing options to help make better hearing affordable for everyone. Perhaps that's why we've been referred by physicians more than 50,000 times, and 99% of our clients say they would refer us to their friends and relatives! Complete NO COST hearing assessments. NO OBLIGATION. Your problem could just be wax! Hearing Test & Otoscopy FREE PLUS! Earn up to: AIR MILES reward miles! ® 1,000 Oakville 8 Lakeshore Road West Book your FREE appointment by May 29, 2015 Located one intersection east of Kerr Street 1-888-246-2407 NSP-RITE-OAKB All prices shown after government funding is applied. Reward mile value is non-transferable. Please allow up to 45 days for the miles to appear in your collector account. This offer cannot be combined with other promotions or discounts for hearing aids. Hearing tests are provided free of charge for adults ages 18 and older. Some conditions may apply. Please see clinic for details. ®TMTrademarks of AIR MILES International Trading B.V. Used under license by LoyaltyOne, Co. and Canada Hearing Ltd. LUC12-13