Druella Acantha Malvina's C column Gem Of The Month - Money is honey, my little sonny, and a rich man's joke is always funny. Some definitions: = Guitarist - All strung up 5 Conductor - Up in Arms Piano Player - All keyed up Drummer - Beat Embezzling - On-the-job draining Sob story - Eye-witness account Middle age - When actions creak louder than words THEN, i § 63 § Seu gh ah anil IEW SNES UR NN NRE RRNGGO NBN] Do you know how to prolong the life of fresh-cut flow- ers? Add 3 T. sugar and 2 T . vinegar to one quart of warm water and stir till sugar dissolves. The sugar helps the flowers last longer and the vinegar cuts down on bac- teria in the water. Strawberry Milkshake 3 cup strawberries 1/4 cup sugar 1/2 tsp. lemon juice 3 cups cold milk 1 cup ice cream 1 cup crushed ice Put in blender, blend until combined. Makes a lovely, fresh cold drink. A local woman invited some people to dinner, At the ta- ble she asked her 6 year old daughter to say the Blessing. "I wouldn't know what to say, the girl replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy say , her mother said. The little girl bowed her head and said, "Dear Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?" News from Medicine - Magnetic resonance imaging may help doctors tell which patients are normal, which have Alzheimer's and which have mild cognitive impair- ment which could develop into Alzheimer's. A local man told his friend, "Boy, am I scared. Got a letter from a guy saying he'd shoot me if I didn't stay away from his wife. "Well all you gotta do is stay away." "Yeah but he didn't sign his name." NaegREN LEARNED EES ENN AEN Randa There were just as many careless drivers 50 years ago, but fortunately, horses had more sense. A golfer of skill knew the score But fogot in a game to yell "fore"! The ball struck a pal Who was kissing his gal Sad to say, he will kiss her no more. FH AHA AE ANA NAN ERY ANNAN EN ARR EY HEN Three rules to avoid failure (1) Worry less but work more (2)Waste less but give more (3)Preach less but practice more They said that it couldn't be done, I said to myself, "I might!" So tackled the job that couldn't be done - gosh, you know they're right! The average girl would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.