Druella Acantha Malvina's Column Gem Of The Month - An authority is a person who can tell you more about something than you really care to know. Did You know? (1) Turtles never die of old age - once their bodies reach maturity, they don't continue to age biologically. Injury, predation or disease eventually kills them. (2) Cockroaches can live up to a month with their heads cut off - they have very little amount of blood pressure so they don't die from bleeding, and they don't need their heads for breathing. They will die from dehydration or starvation. (3)A person will weigh almost a Ib heavier at the poles than they do at the equator. The earth is flatter at the poles and therefore closer to the centre of gravity. In ad- dition, the centrifugal spin effect at the equator slightly counteracts the pull of gravity .(Reader's Digest) A woman lion tamer had the big cats under H such control they took a lump of sugar from & her lips on command. "Anybody can do i I that!" a skeptic yelled. H The ringmaster approached him and asked, & "Would you like to try it?" z "Sure," the man replied, "but first get those : crazy lions out of there!" E ANNAN AAA NANA EN EN DUNNE H EHV) Chocolate Chip Oatmeal Cookies 4 Tbsps. Margarine 2/3 Cup Brown sugar 1/2 cup White sugar Cream the above together Add 1 egg, 1 1/2 tsp. vanilla and beat till lightand creamy Blend in 1/3 cup sour cream Mix and stir in just till combined 1 cup all purpose flour 1/2 tsp. baking soda 1/2 tsp. salt 1 cup rolled oats (old fashioned) Add 3/4 cup chocolate chips. Drop on cookie sheet. Bake about 10 minutes at 350. Ahh! The English Language (1) The bandage was wound around the wound. (2) He could lead if he would get the lead out. (3) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert. (4) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes. (5) The insurance was invalid for the invalid. (6) They were too close to the door to close it. ENE Siti ianbess ig [SEs Eas s ian ics sb ND EEE ANBOIEEERE 7 : A local man is pulled over by a police officer for = a broken headlight. The cop looks in the car and E sees a collection of knives on the backseat. = "Sir," he says. "Why do you have all those ¢ knives?" "They're for my juggling act," the man replies. "Prove it," says the cop. The man gets out of the car and begins juggling = the knives just as two men drive by. "Man", says one guy. "I'm glad I quit drinking. = new sobriety tests are hard." ENN ANY NEN NS FEE ENT Eee Rv en EARS AR IESE AN ENTRAR E By speech first, but far more by writing, man has been able to put something of himself beyond death. In books an integral part of the individual persists, for it can influ- ence the minds and actions of people in different places and times. A row of black marks on a page can move a man to tears, though the bones of him who wrote it are long ago crumbled to dust. (Reader's Digest) Book Launch Saturday, May 15th 2-4 p.m. [he Palace of the Moon A romantic novel of Prince Edward County by Janet Keliough