GRAMMAR TO HELP YOU All of us use advanced forms of grammar, but we just don't know the nomenclature. If you know the names of grammatical techniques, you can appear ever so professorial while not being a whit more intelligent. So, think of this as a self help article, one that will help you out at the next snooty party you attend. You know the kind, where self-absorbed people wax eloquent on a subject that is sufficiently esoteric that no one dares refute them. Common topics here are film, wine, their latest trip to an exotic locale... stuff that makes them feel worldly and knowledgeable and make you feel dumb. Cram a couple of these terms in your memory bank, and who knows, you might be thought of as intelligent. It doesn't work for me, but it might work for you. Anadiplosis - This is when you repeat a noun at the end of a sentence and at the beginning of the next one for emphasis. "Sure, he wrote a book. 4 book in which he used the technique of anadiplosis excessively. He can be called an author. ..an author ignored by the discriminating." Those smarty pants won't argue because they won't know what anadiplosis is. That'll throw a little sand in their oratorical motor. Eponym, or eponymous - A person after whom something is named. There are lots of eponymous words. A "Bailey Bridge", named after Sir Donald Bailey the English engineer. A "Bowie Knife", named after Jim Bowie the American adventurer who died at the Alamo. A "cardigan", the Earl of Cardigan. A "leotard", named after Jules Leotard. You get the idea. Perhaps a "Georgeism", for someone attempting to impress with acutely superficial knowledge. How about a Clerihew? This is a four line verse, dealing with a person who must be identified in the first line. The first two lines rhyme, and so do the second two. A guy named Edward Clerihew Bentley "popularized" this form, although it couldn't ever have become wildly popular. "Dick White Is quite a sight. While golf he plays, Above par he stays" "Monica Alyea Is pleased to say, That being a Mummer + Is not a bummer" Ian Robb Has an awful job. "Cause we just poke along, Not caring right from wrong. OK, these examples are weak and pathetic, but think of the notoriety you might attain if you became proficient at this. Being the premier writer of Clerihews in Ontario may not be what you sought as a lifetime goal, but at least you could claim it. You'd be famous for something. Having written three Clerihews, at the moment the title is mine. Why don't you invent a Clerihew and send it to Desi Marcille at The Mirror? He'll print anything. After ali, he prints these articles, and overnight you would become the Clerihew Master of Greater Milford. Or "litotes™, which is an opinion conveyed by denying its opposite. "It 1s no easy task listening to you expound on such trivial matters", meaning it is difficult. "I wouldn't say that you are profound", meaning Continued on page 9 & Removal Brush chipping Lot clearing Firewood, Hardwood & Softwood lumber Black River Tree Service Glenn Guernsey 476-3757