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tE! CAKADIAN STAT~MAN. BOWAIIVILL!. O~4TÂR1O ?mTR~flAT. MAl. lmth. 1955 As St. PatriclF's Day draws to a close for yet another year, we can't help tbink- ing that in Canada and throughout the worid we are in enough difficulty to de- light the most rebellious Irishman. At both extremes of Canada, there is trouble. In B.C., the civil service have staged an on again, off again strike, the first of its kind in the country. In New- foundland, the battie of the century is stili hitting headliles as Premier Joey Smail- wood continues bis scrap with the loggers' union. Even in the banner Province of Ontario, there are problerus. The civil service this week sent a message to al unewspapers, in effect, asking citizens to protest against the inadequate salaries and benefits they have. Even the Indians at Brantford have been infected by the unrest that appears to be prevalent. At Ottawa, the Prime Minister and bis party are not only bedeviiled by policies they inherited and of their awn making, they have now had several others thrown in their iap which they didn't expect. As a resuit of Mr. Smallwood's precipitate action in banning the I.W.A. and the Teamsters' Union from his province, the IR.C.M.P., who police the province have been cast Iu a raie that has brought much criticism on them and, indirectly, has created a crisis in the force. This week, long tirne Commissioner Nicholson, one of the outstanding men in his field, resign- ed in disagreement with his minister-an action aimost without precedent and one which is bound to upset the morale and efficiency of the organizatian. As though this were nat enough, on Tuesday came the tragic news that a mast essential member of the government's Ingenuity ih Sureiy, there must be a book some- where, or a course, for promaters of that xnost popularn cultural pursuit calied l'pro- fessional wrestling". We have particular reference ta the great varieties of bout conclusions which one sees iu this f ield. TIhe best minds in the business must spend iiours working out new and different ar- rangements which will be crowd pleasers at the tin'e and so exciting that no one would be willing to miss the sequel the foiiowing week. Last week at Mapie Leaf Gardens - and repeated on TV late Saturday even- lng, promoter Frank Tunney or one of his advisers came through with a master stroke. Blond "Gorgeous" George and "Whipper" Billy Watson were billed la the big bout of any season. If the one witb the golden tresseslost the'bout, he agreed to- bhave bhis head shaved in the ring. If Mr. Watson were defeated he would retire. Tunney bad two possibilities to offer in his headlue event which struck the fancy of neariy 15,000 fans, plus untold thousands on televisian. There was fiend- ish glee la the prospective ciipping of that George feliow. Every red-blooded Canad- !an must curi Up bis lip when "Gorgeous" George cames laVa the ring not oniy with bis hair la tight ringiets and dyed blond, but with bis entry preceded by a truly gorgeous girl la shorts who sprays the Fea r of Politicians and sanie others in publie lite seem ta dislike being labelled 'as standing for anythlag that migbt hase them votes. Some carry their distaste for labelsi r 30 far as ta, list theinselves as ladependent Liberals or independent Conservatives. No independènt'C.C.F.-er cames ta mind. This may be because ladependence and1 sociaiism are contradictary concepts. 1 One can appreciate the poliician'sg point of view, withaut subscribing ta 1.j To be labeiied as standing for sometbing usually implieà being against its opposite.q IV is true that the Liberal or Conservative( labels should irnply anti-sociaiism, buti teani, Externai Affairs Minister Dr. Sidney Smith, had died of a heart attack. His deatb couid not have lieen more untimely la view of the seriousness of world events and the impending negotiations over the extremeiy toucby-Berlin situation. This has indeed been a terribly diffi- cuit year for political figures at the ted- eral level especiaily. IV bas been a year of great decisions and almost overwbeim- ing problenis. Prime Minister Diefenbak- er and many of bis ministers nmust certain- iy be wandering as they wearily wake up la the morning what new, perpiexing probhems the day will briag. l'e Prime Minister, faced with the grave responsi- bility of maklag the final decision on al the major issues, sbould bave the prayers of us ail. His wisdam, energy, strength and patience must be taxed to the limit and iV would noV be surprising if there were times wben be recalled witb wist- fui refiection those mare or iess casuai, pleasant and peaceful days wben be was an apposition cri tic without great responsi- bility. This year as he bas been forced, to deai with the 1,000 man March on Ottawa by the wheat farmers, the cancehiation of the Avro Arrow program, the Indian crisis at Brantford reserve, the unemployment situation, the battie to, contrai increasing expenditures in government, the persist- ent demands of provincial premiers for more money, the demands of labor for action ta disallow Newfoundiand's new labor iaws, the demands ta send more R.C.M.P. ta that province and a thousand and one other problems, he migbt well find use for that aid axiom. that "mather said there wouhd be days like this - but not so many." n Promotion ring witb perfumed disinfectant. Wbat a repuisive type compared ta the idol of ail virile Canadians, the great "Whipper" who bas downed the best of thein witbout uslag those sneaky, dirty under-banded tactics so frequentiy seen in wrestling circles. Surely, be won't be beaten and retire. WhaV would the wrestling gaine be without hini? A few of us knowing types had tbe play ail figured out. There was, oniy one ending possible - a draw. George wasn't golag ta agree ta bave bis iocks trlmmed, nor was Watson likeiy ta retire. Sa, wbat other ending cauhd there be? Well, Promoter par excellence Tunney certainly fooied everybody and did it with a fiourish. How rnuch .it cost him. ta persuade George ta part with bis curls, we'll neyer know. But, that is wbat bap- pened Mi' à bangý-up finish tbat bad the fans screamlag with joy. They'll be taiking about that bout for years ta came and wandering wbat bap- pened ta the Gorgeous one and bis female valet. How wiil he bill himseif lu future, as the Yul Brynner of the ring? No doubt he'li think of something. Maybe be'li be a Masked Marvel until it grows iu again - or possibiy, it was a wig ail the time. Whatever bappens, aur admiration continues ta grow for a great pramoter, Frank Tunney, who bas given bis custom- ers many hours of exciting entertainnient. Labels ers engage in iflegal picketing and other activities of a violent nature. To speak out would be ta label himnself as anti- union or auti-labor. No risk appears ta attacb to eue who calîs hiniseif a friend of unions or the friend of the farmner, aithough those labels usually imply apposition to others, ecm- ployers, mnanufacturers or city people gen- eraliy. The politician who openly identi- fies bimseif with capitalists, even la a city where capitalism 18 its chief reason for existence, is at once handlcapped by bis own inteliectuai banesty. Privately be inay agree that a capitalist is entitled to, as fair treatment under the law as anyane cise. Pubiicly be must dadge and equiva- caVe. In the folklore of politics capitalists are wicked, union workcrs arc downtrod- den and farmers are boncst. Woc ta the politician wbo tampers wifh these ballow- ed beiefs-The Printed Word. îights the 22nd anniversary of ifs constitution. Ahi Moscow newspapers carricd editariais praising the constitution, whicb says "free- dom ai speech, press, assembly, street pro- cessions and demonstrations" are guaran- teed. Evidence would indicate tbat the "iguarantee" onhy apphies lu cases wbere the "freedoms" are employed under gov- erument approval. Many of us taik of "rigbts", and as a signposf of freedomit ifmgbf be weli that these be ciearly set down. However, if is ta be noted that the guarantee ai these rights, as ahways, lies la the moral re- sponsibility of the peaple and their gov- erument. To say we have rights is anc thing; Vo so conduct aur affairs that these rights are bonored for ail men is another. -Tillsonburg News. THREE LITTLE WORDS A prominent saiesman, now retired, summed up bis success in three simple words ... and then some. "I discovered at an eariy age," be said, "that mast ai the difference between average people and top people couid be expiained la three words. The top people did wbat was expected of thein and then saine. Tbey were thoughtful ai others; they were considerafe and kind-and thlen saine. They met their obligations and responsibilities fairly and squarely-and f hen saine. They could be caunted on in an emergency-mnd then soins," A MacDuff Ottawa Report1 Pensions Probably few Canadian tax- payera realize that the federal bavernznent 18 apcnding more than hall a billion dollars this year ta pay the $55 aid a ge pen- sion to everyone over 70. An. other $30 million is raughly the share Ottawa pays the Provinces for aid age assistance to thase in need between 65 and 70. In fact, aur spendlng on the elderly ranks second only ta defence in the national budget. Rave a Better Plan These are smorn if thc acts cantained in thc report on aid age security in the United States and Canada recently prepared for Uic government by Dr. Robert Clark of the University of British Columbia. He bas' found that aur average benefits, taken in relation ta Canadian In- corne, compare favorably with average benefits under thc U.S. old age insurance scherne; but, from thec factual evidence pre- sented by Dr. Clark there are many reasons for concluding that our American neiglibors have the better plan. Ail Fu1Iy Pald For In the United States the pensions are fully paid for by contributions from ernmployees, emplayers, and the self-employ- ed including farmers). They are taxed on their incorne for these contributions and get their pen sions on retirement provid- igit is at age 62 or aiter for wornen and at age 65 or after for men. What are the ad- vantages here? Can't Be Bribeil 1. Each person gets what he pays for and knows what he's paying for. He can't be "brib- cd" by politicians offering himi a higher pension; he knows that in order to get a higher pension he'l1 have to make a bigger con- tribution. In Canada, by con- trast, the money for aid agre pensions comes from three d f- ferent general taxes and a gov- ernment payment from general revenue to make up the deficit; there la no way for a taxpaycr ta know just .w much a poli- tician's prarnuse la going ta cost hlm. Trake Pride in Paying Vr. Clarke says lie has faund that Amnericans fake real pride in thec fact that thcy are paying for their aid age ipensions. He didn't find a. sirnîlar p ride in this country in the Canadiani schernc, with ifs aspect of '«gov-1 ernment hand-out".9 Pension Relatel to Ineorne 2. Each persan gets a pension In relation to, bis incarne. In a higli-coat, high-incomc area, he gets a higher pension to sustain him In aid age than be would in a low-cost low-income ares. In Canada, too, there are wide regional variations and varia- tions between the cost af living ini cities and rural areas; but everybodygets exactly the saine $55 pension. Pai on IKetiremient 3. The American pension Isc paid an retirement. The Canad-i jan isn't pad untii age 70. In 1 the U.S. thei d age assistance, c shared wlth the states, is used ta suppienient aid age insurance in cases ai need. In Canada it lo used ta "fi the gap" between à 65 and 70 on Uic basis af what à many people cansider a rather a harsh means test.à 4. The American Insuranceç 1 25 TZARS AGO (1984> The Selrite Stores, aperated by Stednian Brothers a! Toron- to, opened a store ia Bowman- ville in the location formerly occupicd by Gildlirist's ciofhing business. Thc company had 65 stores in Canada. Manager was W. G. Avery. Billie Rowland andi John Hoirnes, Newcastle, and Garnet Rickard, Bawmanville, were members of a winning Durhiam County seed judging teani at Quinte Sed Fair, Napanee. They were prcsenfed with tlie Wardens' Tropîy, donafcd by flic 1934 wardens. Harold C. Rickaby, son o!f te late John Rickaby, for many years cierk o! Clarke Township, was appainfeci Provincial Gea- loglaf. lHe was a graduate af Newcastle Higli Schooi, andi University af Toronto. Mr. W. H. Goodwin of Mon- treai, a former business mian who sohd oufta flihe T. Eafon Ca. Lirnifcd and decided ta de- vote tic rest ai bis lufe fa Chiristian wark, was sclieduhed ta speak every night at Trinify Churcli during Passion Wcek. Bawmanville Hospital was holding ifs 21sf birtliday party af flic Nurses' Residetce under the auspices aiflihe Women's Auxiiiary. W. F. Ward succeeded Ma- gistrate R. M. Caotaon as presi- dent o!flhe local brandi o!flihe Canadian Leglon. Attendance was not large at a skating carnival spansared by flic Business Men at Taylor's Rink. I. G. Hefkey and Dr. J. C. Dcvift judgcd Uic costumes, witli Mary Martyn receiving fhe prize for lady's best fancy dres an d Ray Diliing for men's fan- cy dress. Darothy Humpage had thc besf clown costume. Dates in May werc set for fie Durliam Caunty Music Festival ta be beici in Bowmanville. Mr. E. P. Bradt was president af flic Association and afliers on flic cornmitfee includcd Mrs. Donald Robb. Mrs. A. Dru-n- mond and M. J. Taniblyn of Orono. Miss Helen Morris andi Mr. Francis Sutton. Bowman- - Southern Styi .scheme pravides for benefits te 1dependents of retlred people and ta their survivors <maInly iwidows) if they die. These as- pects are lacklng from the Canadian scherne; but tliey are sarnewhat carnfcnsated by aur scherne af farnily allowances and L tc fact that aur aid age pensions go te the "brcad-winner" and "dependent" alike once they have rcaclied 70. A Blunt Instrument Scen just in Uic liglit ai these ifour points, flic Canadian scierne appears ta be rather a blunt Instrument comparcd taeflic re- finement aetflic Arerican pro- gramn. Our nietliod opens flic way te political bribery, in- equities between different pen- sioners, inadequacies through neot being paid on retirement, and rigidity against aiteration te meet necd. But while flic Conscrvatives indicated lu the election campaigus that tbcy favorcd flic American type o! sclieme, Prime Minister Diefen- baker pramised that any adop- tion afitif ere wouid be "over and above" flic present fiat-rate benefit af $55. If this promise la kept ta the letter, costs wili niake if very difficuit indeed ta alter the Canadian scheme in a sensible way. If lie had prom- ised that aid age assistance wouid be used ta assure that al ncedy cases wouid be kept at lcast at flic present rate af bene- fits, it wauid have been a di!- ferent matter. Shortcominga in Systcm In any case, if appears that Dr. Clark's repart lias disclosed some grave shortcomings in tfli Canadian system-not lu the ôverall scale ai benefits, but in the way flic money is coliected and distributed. If we couid put behlnd us flic tragic cx- perience with fthe means test of tlic "thîrties" and look forward te a hurnanely appiied needs test in more prosperobis finieç. we couid h=-z- a- basic aid age insurancc program, plus as- oistance where neccssary, which wauld be mucli better than Uic present systern. Capital fBilCapsules Dr. Clark's repart brauglit ouf many little-known facts. Did you know, for instance, that Canadian per capita in- carnes are on the aver- age 30 per cent lower than Ainerican? Or that in Canada shelter casts 20 f0 25 per cent less in Uic country than in the city? Dr. Clark also shows how you can get bath flicAnierican and Canadian aid age benefits. Here's an exampie: a Canadian goca te. flic U.S. in 1950 at age 60 and carms enough fa pay flic maxi- mum contribution taeflic Amer- ican aid age insurance scheme. He can retire in 1956 on $108.50 a rnantl plus $54.25 for bis wiie if she is 65 or over. Aiter 10 years' residceiçe in flicU.S. tliey can continu' ta receive their Amnerican benefits oufsidc flic country, se tliey return ta Cana- dia lu 1960. One ycar lafer, under 1present legisiation, flic liusbandat age 71, can sfart re- wcivngflice $55 aid age pension. Sae ii his wife if she is over 70. Moreover on Jan. 1 flua vear flicU.S. benefit wiii have goIic up ta $116 for the liusband and $58 for flic wife. Adding if ail up, husband and wife fa- gether aiter lie reaches age 711 will be getting $284 a month! 1 49 TZARS AGO (1910) 1 Young men of the Methodist -League entertained wifh a "ahanty mcn's" pragram, fthe scene portraying a lumber 5 men's camp in Algonquin wifli 5 thc mea in work day attire, sing- 1ing sangs, playing jakes on ecd toflier, etc., A. W. Pickard, Sarn iGianville and Dr. Norman AI- lia wcre arnong Uic singers. F. A. Haddy was "boss o! the camp". Hot beans, sandwiches and flapjacks wcre served fa the audience as well as flic performers. Cook ýwas C. H. Anderson. Guests were received at fie Maaonic At Home by Bras. F. J. Mitchell, J. H. McMurtry, C. 1B. Kent and D. C. Betts wlio Infroduoed theni ta Worshipful Master F. F. Morris and Rigît Worshipfui Bras. E. R. Baun- sali and D. B. Simnpson. In the Fashion Hinta cohumn -Wifli flicaftemnoon gowns, tîcre arc carricci parasols a! black chiantilly lace over white. TIc carth was scho-duied fa pass tîrougli flictail af Hal- hcy's Carnet in April. Charles M. Bice ai Denver, Colorado, gave a resurne o! tic history of fhis cornet. Edmund Halley affer whom the cornet was namcd, in bis study of cornets concludcd fIat anc was reap- pcaring cvery 75 years, and pre- dicted ifs reappearance for 1758. HalcyV died in 1742. but flic carnet made Ifs appearance in 1758 as predlcted, and again in 1835. Right Worship Bro. D. B. Simipson, K.C., presenfed Jeru- salem Lodge, No. 31, A.F.& A.M., wifh fîree beautifully il- huminafed windows widl add- cd greathy ta Uic appearance ai flic lodgc roonis. Gea. B. McClellan. manager ai flic Crown Bank at Scotland, Ont., was visiting his cousin J. A. McClellan, manager af t1ie Bank af Montreal here. prior ta receiving an appointmcnt il' tii. West, (Mind you, they have tc Canada because the C pension isn't payable permanent residence at The band hired by t ta welcome the farmers1 West in their march en consisted of members band of the Governor-( Foot Guards (working own time, of course). ieads us to mention tû week we're planning a: on agriculture. àb-i-*M Hampt on, March 5. Il Want to be Prime Minister? Dear Mr. James, tret jim Whaf with mucli snow, pri- whase ac ces and the inreaeo ae questionc and restrictive laws,--even for ai lazinesn cats,-we tbink we are lu a cd *"Joes bad way. Hawever there are rnicipal wvarse situations. Still feliow- *what flic travellers tell us that in China officiais there is no religious persecu- awn. tion, and witli much cisc that Some oi visitars ta China,-tiough they learný that neither read, speak nor h~ear municipal tlie language,-we are suppos - pointed, ie ed ta believe sucli. of the Mu cierk, wI We ria get some frutli ouf of position1 China, by Chinese papers and accused c those fIat escape ta Hongkong. dictatorial, In the communes, wliere flic prabably, hast vestiges of private proper- infeliigenc, ty, and private anytblng, have payers, wl been destroy-ed, Christian fam- for their ilies have no last possibility ai public w~ witness ta their own. Church many coui groups rnay not worship in fleicnlufli sur homes. Higli School pupils must shot and spend haif-time in manuai respinsibil work, and if anc is found, even cierk.. wiio to, tliank God for food, fIat an4, the woive is due for dismissal froni s'hooi blunders, and la put in a factory. Grad- atlierwisc. uates, if Christian, find no Most af w*ir1, or are sent fa flie lard- est, farthest Places. Christian doctors become farmers, be- in tfli las cause, being Christian lie is fit long ta tl an]y for manual work. After fthe 'illega 1958 only children of flic pro- xnay nof bi letariat can go fa University, evangelist, or serve in Government. There cond com is no witness in fthc Universi- tlic Natiai fies. The last College Christian It seemsL 'Union has been forced ta dis. churdli is band. Chiristian, In the cdurci an cniorccd ship,-as Tnerger of ail Protestant de- phrase,--oi nominations is in progress. The cat asmbs Seventli Day people must wor- ctcms slip on Sunday-(if there js shaîl agali tirne). Y.M.A. (thec C was de-- durc ihe: heted long since) Secretaries cd? Some are given productive labour, as cd ta recol are hundrecis of pastors. In thc ernimenf, cliurch, wam,2n's meetings, thé them fIal Salvation Army uni!orms andbon w etc., must all go. In August fthc also in thi 65 dhurcies ln Peking were nerged into four. In Septem- 'ber flic 200 Shanghai churdies were mergcd inta 15. Ail real and movabie churdli properfy flear Sir: -and funds are ta go fa the local Threc Self Patriotic Commit- At 'aur tee. Tis merger takes ta flic l2fh, a ni towns. O!fIte scores that I write you knew in smali places, wc bear parking a thaf none is now a churcli. Long harly at S aga ail aur schoals, hospifals vices in« etc., had been given fa fhe readers cc Sfafc-'volunfarily'-jusf as la- some of t] bour in camps is. The condemn- enisue frc ing af "rightests" pastars stili discourfeou procecds, and those wl» have- We havo lost churches iswcll thec labour in somej force. There is only anc church been redu( leit in Hankow. The Chinese and lnasoi Catholic bishaps, pricsts andi abstructed nuns are also obliged to labour. parked dui Of course fhey are enfhusiastie and also 1ý about their work from 6 a.rn pied for te to 9 p.m. in the fields. If seenis at noon or thaf ail are now classified into waifing to four classes-two good and two ren aitere bad. Church workers are put We con of peopl officiai at ýo live In posed ta i Canadian Lyle was during af Uic Tg road.) and that the COF piaced. 1 from the surne that i Ottawa becauseo ai the trufli is,b Generai's had reaci in tlieir wished to Wbicli retlrement hat next whic he ,n article facultiesi for sucha - Beforeà Sta start ya let us rerr ed too ci elected re him in ir then thcy respective nt. people, el Ot, oniy rely -t ciass, since they be- te exploitera. Amang alifies' tflichcurchrnen :e, i.s ta be an itincrant tnot breach tflic'se- iing', not suggest fliat zfliaf even flic stafe- no longer free, nor andi freedom, ta wor- we understand that )nly obtains in secret. e 'faifli' liveci in flic s,0s we hope tIat if ei. One wondcrs if the ere is really concern- Ssemn more concern- Dgnize a God-h'ess gov- than fa "remnember t are in bonds, as ifi them,--.as being Ld Body". H'ceb. 13 :3. Fred J. Rced Bowmanviile, Ont. March 16, 1959. meeting of Marci notion was oarried ta ia leffer concerning af dhurcies, particu- Sunday morning ser- flic hope that your .ould be informed o! fie prablems fIat can om. inconsiderafe or is parking. ce been advised that instances trafiic lias icd ta, a single lane, mre cases, cornpicfcly 1by cars that are ring Churcli services by cars that are stop- en or fliteen minutes n Sundays by parents )pick up their child- Sunday Sehool. isider this liazardaus ihave distressed a lot [e to read -wherc an kQueen's Park is sup- have inferred Uiat Aiick san incompetent Cierk Town af Bownianvillc, lic had now been re- Most pecopie wouid as- at Aiick liad been fired of incompetence. The lie resigned because lie Ied tlic age of 65, and )o enjoy the benefits of nt, such as travel, etc., Le still possessed the and health necessary activities. anyone Joins the pack, yapping at Alick's lieds, nember that, if lie act- >fficiously, there were representatives ta keep ne, and if they didn't, ywere derelict in their ,duties. Far too many elected ta, Councai, not eon tlic judgrnent andi ce ai their clerk, but n as a sort of deity, ctions must neyer be 1, and because of ment- s, many af these eiect- s" neglect to study 1laws, ta find ouf just duties of the variaus are, including their >f tbem neyer seem ta ýevery action ai every 1officer, elected or ap- is subject ta fthc ternis mnicipai Act. Sa, if a ,o lias occupied bis for several years, is of being incompetent, Irambunctiaus, lie. reilects fthe degree ai ce o! bis fellow rate- rh0 were elected ta act, .constituents, as Uic watcb-dogs. Far fao nciliors enjoy basking iliglit ai being a big [leave far tao much lity ta the haragçe& 0isipromptiy iussed ta es ifle makes any wlietber deliberate or the cicrks aifniy ac- for the foiiowing reasons:- 1. In case of a fire or an emergency if la possible that tic f ire truck or emcrgency vehile would be unnccessarilv' deiayed, or prevented enfirely frorn gctting to ifs destination. 2. In case ai a fire or oflier disaster wbere immediate eva- cuation aoflice Churcli became necessary, witli cars parkcd al- mosf bumper ta bumper in front o!flice Churcli, and other cars double parked in flic saine area there wouid be no place for any great number af people ta escape in safety. 3. We have tricd ta teacli children if is an unsafe prac- tice to walk between parked cars, end yet whcn cars' are double or triple parked in front ai Clurcles the dhildren have no choice but ta walk befwecn flic parked cars ta readli fhe cars of their waiting parents. Wc have ne wisli ta driv people away from churcl, bu,.~ we do believe fiat if they woulq. consider these bazarda in their true liglit, fiat tliey wouid be somewhaf mare co-operative in an effort fa prevent these haz- ards from occurring. We appreciafe your assistance in helping us present this ln. formation to Uic public. Sincerely, John C. Phuhlips, Secretary, Traffie Advisory Board. The Canadian Red Cross andl tlie Arerican Red Cross have a mutual agreement ta suppiy free blood ta tourists wlio mayi£ require bload transfusions while visiting ln their neigli- bouring -nation. I SUGAR and SPICE: Aiter about fen years in tIc business, a weekiy news- paper. editor becomes sanie- fhing o! an autîority on "ban- quets". Naw a banquet, when I used ta read about thern as a kid, was a sumptuous affair. The word conjured up visions af Roman voluptuaries media- ing on couches, drinklng Fat- ernian wine and garging themselves on ail manner of touies borne in by half-nak- cd Nubian slaves. Twenfy-five years later, I'ni prcpared to admit fiat a banquet consists of: a siof af famafo juice in a paper cup; a plate lieaped wif i nasied potatoes and gravy, cold tur- kcy and hukewarin, lunipy turnips or canned peas and carrofs; a picce o! pie wîidh can range from delectable fa gawdoffal, depending on who made if; a slug of warmisli fea or coffec poured from a large porcelain pot by a pers- piring and ratier cross lady member o!flhe cafcring or- ganization. But naf anly the viands are changed. It's the atrnosphere. At the banquet ai my boylsh imagination, the participants begaiî about 9 a.m. Thcy ate andi drank in leisurcly fash- tan, exchanging qulps, eplg- rama, verses. Their digestion was aldcd by the muted strumming ai luies. About mldnîght, glassy-eycd, they would clap for the dancing girls and acrahats. Later, sf111 becehing rlchly, they would toiter 'off, aided by their ser- vants far their sedan chairs, home and bed. Nowadays tlie banquet starts sharp at 6.30. So everv- bodv, milis arourd hiingril'! until 10 to 7, w1iii1e fie good ladies in tne kitchen muffter imprecations ind tr 'v to keep things bot. Ther. is a vast Dispensed by Bill Smiley shuffling a! chairs as every. body la seated. The vice-pre- aident runs mad.ly about try- ing ta squeeze two extra clairs in af the head table because somebody goofed. Then there's a sharp "plng". as the chairman hua hlis wa- terglasa and mutters smre- thlng. There la another vast shuffling as everyane lurches ta bis feet. There la a iurnh- led clinking of glasses flar the Queen, foliowed by Grace. That Grace ha. been iollow- ii.g the Qucen for years and don'i bet she won't bc along %on the Royal Tour ihis sum- mner. TIen tiere is Uic painful sfrugglc back infa flie narrow space, fli chcairs standing as close as the Grenadier Guards shoulder fa shoulder. The la- dies rush in wlf i plates. Tliey are lialted la ficir fracks by thec clairman, wîo announce-, lie would like fa introduce tic Iead table. The table is unimpressed, but fiose seat. ed af if bob up wifh variaus expressions and stand flere with ticir arma hanging dow n. 0 When ihis embarraning ri- tuai is cnded, the ladies, flot ta be denied agaln, hurt themselves upon the head ta- ble. The chairman's wife, who haies iumpy furnips, carnies an a sparkllng conversation wih The Guest Speaker, on ber leff, agreelng ihat yes lisa beeni quite a wlnter aiyd yen there', nothing to beat home- cooked food at a banquet * * 0 Tic chairman, desperately trylng ta remember tic brul- liant "cîairman's remnarks" lie wrate ouftf raf afternoon, gulps with untasting palate, interi'upted at cvery second bite bv the wvife of Tie Guest Speaker, who knows that she is âupposed ta bc charming ta h fllcals, but la wishing sIc was borne watdhin-g TV and wondering wliy tfie l sIc drove 60 miles from the city with fiat megalo-nian- iac husband ai bers wlio can't refuse an invitation te speak. Meanwhile, down ln the rest af the hall, It la not ex- actly hilarlous. At firsi, ihere is a litile scattcred conver- sation. Then the pente be- gin ta sinike. Morosely watch- ing the head table gueste wadlng lie o the turkey, everyone tges ia othe celery and olives a.nd cata his bun. Jusf abouttfl ic ine fie head table hoga are served flicir coffe and are ligiting up, flic comnmon types at tic end aifie hast fable get flicir plates. They caf like fury, but are juif starting their pic wien tie chairman pinga bis glass. Tram tIen on, they have fa sneak bites and chew unobtrusivcly, ficir headi fwisted foward tie beaci ta- ble. Whiie The Guesi Speaker la introduced, the catcrlng ladies tlpioc about, gathenlng up dishes wiih the silence of a. crew af auto wreekers. Then they go ouf ln the kitehen and enJey iheir own dinner, amld àa phenomenal rattling ai croekery and subdued peals of laughter that have The Gucat Speaker grlttlnt his teeth. Oh, I'm not down on ban- quets. Don'L think that for a minute. I love theni. But I tink I was bora about 2,000 years tas lafe. 1'il bet I've been af 300 banquets in fhe hast ton ycars, and I liavent had a goblet of Falerniai w: r e, been waitcd on by a Nubian slave, or scýen a sin- gle dancing girl, af anc or them. I f o a ED-ITORIALS quaintance are grossly over- *À,I Lwarked, underpaid, and un4p- 'Tl preciated. They are expected to dry-nurse every jerk who fantk'1% himseif as a great municipbuf ernancipator; they are expectcdr ta be careful, correct, and bon- est in their accaunts, and to 1render a faithful report wlien icalleci upon ta do sa; they are at everybody's beck and caîl 24 hours a day, and wben their re- flexes slow toeflic point where if Is advisabie ta retire, their early days af retirement are aiten spoiled by character assas- sins. Because I have neyer had any- thing ta do witli Bowmanviiie's municipal affairs, I don't know whetlier Alick Lyle deservcd Uie verbal shellacking administer- cd by thec dcputy mnister, but I do know that, if al lich na- bobs ai Queen's Park pounced on hlm, I wauld sf111 be proud te cali hlm rny fricnd, because I saw him, under Uic strain ai battie, act like a brave soidier. and an excellent Canadian. Neariy 45 years ago, we joiried the sarne regirnent, trained ta- gether, were in flic sarne corn- pany, serveci in France and Belgiumn in thc front Une area from Sept., 1915, until Nov., 1918, flien into Germnany with tlic Army of Occupation, and finaiiy, discbarged in Toronto, May, 1919. In ail that time, we were never far apart, and 1 neyer knew him ta be unkind, officiaus, or riegligent ini bis duty. He granted many fav- ours, without fuss ar bother. At ail times, during aur period ai soldiering, lie as a well beliavcd, conscientiaus, even tempered, kindly, brave corn- rade-a crediftat hirnacîf, bis famiiy, bis borne town, bis regi- j1 mient, and Canada. ' .Sa it's gaing ta take a lot ai convincing. before I believe that Alick deliberiâtely did wrong as Cierk ai the Town of Bowrnan- ville, and riglif or wrong, 1 still tbink lie's a prctty sweil guy. My buddy! and -. Distant Past Frrom ITes Statam Files "e iaau >tteorn= EtabUmshd 1854 with which in ncorporatd 8h owm=nyil News, The. Newcastle Independent and The. Orono News 1051h Year of Continuous Service ta the Town cf Bowmanvillécand Durham County AN INDEPENDENT NEWSPAPER & SUESRIPTN RATES $«.0 a Yom,. stzictly lu advanc. 85.00 a Ym In the Unted States J£uthlzd tu Seond Oce.Nafti ftaOffice wDepariment.Ottawa lubliahed by lmo JAM PtJELISHG COMPANY LIMIME lowmnvil.e, Ontari o JOUR M. 1MMES, EmIon PAM pou THE CANADIAN STATESUM, BOWNUNVfftt, CNTAMO TRUPMAT, MAIL IM, 1959