Ski» Lift gets a Iift Though the weather was quite balmy last week, the ski hili was the scene of much activity. This large crane was on site on Monday, September 28, to instali a new quadruple chair lift. The new liftis1 repiacing a 'T' bar on the hili in front of the west chalet. An Oshawa Ski Club spokesperson said they hope to have the new lift running for the club's open house on October 25. Arhur Black WHAT A WAY TO GO It's flot that l'in frightened of dying. I just don't want to be there when it happens. Woody Allani Cail me morbid, but IVve been thinking about death late- ly. Specifically, about ail the ways I'd rather not go. Woody Allan notwithstand- ingit looks from empirical evi- dence, that my attendance at the occasion is pretty well mandatory. Ail God and I have to work out are the details. On the off chance that The Big Guy with the Celestial Clipboard is reading t h i s column, I'd like to submnit a short list ofthe ways 1 would rather not shuffle off this mor- tal coul. No shuiffling-, for starters. I'd like to go out with a littie style, a touch of flair. Please don 't calilm y number whiie l 'm ined up at a Burger King waiting for my cheeseburger Deluxe. Don't let me be sand- bagged by a potted geranitum tumbling off somne sixth storey windowsili -- and reaiiy, I wouldn't want to be caught, weil, dead, keelingç over into the chip dip at soi-e journaiists convention in North York. Spcaking of mnortal indigni- ties, Lord, please don't let mie go ike Elvis. The Kingi of Rock and Roll. Dead on his toilet. Jeez. Ahl things considered, 1 think I'd prefer to be murdered. Shot by Hugh Hefner., say nina fit of masculine jealousy. Or discretely poisoned by a dis- traught Miss Universe, driven crazy by the knowledge that she couldn't have mie. I'd even settle for a basebal bat in the back of the noggin from Mark McGwire, unable to endure the irony of being shad- ed into obscurity by my simple, understated maleness. Believe me, there are worse ways to leave the planet. Ask Hans Dalm-olen -- if you can. The late Dutcb sales- man met his fate in the blades of a 21 -inch rear-bagger lawn- mower, wielded by bis wife, afier she discovered lipstick on one of his shirt collars. Or the Parisian landlady who made the mnistake of criti- cizing one of artist Theodore Gardelles paintings. Gardeile stabbed her. With a long-tailed comb. ln 1953, an Albertan by the name of Fred Raiston gave his wife that long distance feeling by strangling ber with the cord of the family telephone. Meanwhiie a frustrated New,ý Jersey housewife nixed bier hubbo hy suffocating him wîtb T rent receives fui for pilot program Peterborough MPP Gary Stewart presented Trent University with a cheque on Thursday, October 1 at 10: 15 a.m. for the' first year of a pilot project to support and integrate students with learn- ing disabilities. The presen- tation was made to Trent's President and Vice- Chancellor Bonnie Patterson in the President's Meeting Room, Bata Library, Trent University. SThe axnount is a share of the $30 million in provincial funding referred to in May's budget to establish the pilot proj ect at Ontario unîversi- ties and colleges. Trent -- and Eunice Lund- Lucas, Co-ordinator of its current Special Needs office - - is taking a lead role in set- ting up a "virtual" centre of excellence for post-secondary education for students with learning disabilities in Ontario. Lund-Lucas, as Project Manager, wfll oversee the "centre" establlshed at four sites: Trent, Nipissing University, Loyallst and Canadore colleges. These pilot sites were teamed to pro- vide a wlde range of prograin cholce for the students enter- ing the institutions, as well as being relatively small in size and having a commit- ment to quality teaching and the individual student., Colleges and universities bave admitted an lncreasing number of students with learnling disabilities over the past decade. Learning dis- abilities conunon among such a bag of his favorite potato chips. Back in 1843, two irate Frenchmien namied Mellant and Lenfant fell into an argument over a pooî table. Lenfanit hissed 'choose your weapons'. Mellant did __ an eighit bal -- which hie proceeded to sink in Lenfant's forehead.. Sports can be dangerous -- mortally su. fil Germany,, Peter Geiger clubbed his fishing buddy Horst Renk to death in an argument over bait. Geiger'ýs weapon of choice: a dead snappe.r. Another German sportsmian, Gunnar Waktel, uised a bowlNing pin to club his best friend and bowling partner to death. His buddies crime? He goosed Guninar just as he released his ball,causing hîm to miss a strike that would have given hlmi a perfect gamne. Somnething like that -- only a whole lot worse -- happened to England's King--,Edmund Ironside 'wvay back i n 10 16. According to a book called The Porcelain God: A Social History of the Toilet, King Edmnund was killed while seat- ed on bis privy. By a swords- man lurking in tle cesspit below hiim. Ugh. That's even wVorse than the sendoif Elvis got. students are difficulties in areas such as listening, per- ceiving, reading, writing, cal- culating and spelling. Such students now make up as mnuch as 3 per cent of the stu- dent body as some post-sec- ondary institutions. To improve their posslbllity of success, sucli students bene- fit from admission policles and practices which are inclusive, combined with sup- portive programs that allow the student to excel to his or her best ability. The new program consists of two stages of system-wide supports for students with leamning disabilities. The first year, belng implemented this academic year, involves pro- grams aimed at incoming stu- dents. The subsequent phase in the year following wlll also target upper year stu dents. Intended to help students make the transition from sec- ondary school to post-sec- ondary, but also from post- secondary to work, the program will establish a sup- port network of students, staff and faculty for students with learnlng disabilities. It will also provide opportuni- ties for such students to con- dilsabillties. Trent's proposaI wlth its partner Institutions was sub- mltted last March in response to a government request. Trent is well qualified to take a lead role, smnce it bas a high proportion of students with learning disabilities. The uni- versity sent information regarding the prograrn to applicants who disclosed dur- ing the admissions process that they bave a learning dis- abflity. This fal's pilot at each partner institution will Involve up to 25 new first- year students who have self- Identifled that they have learning disabilities. Thiere is no cost to the students par- ticipating. IT PAYS TÉO ADVERTUSE .IN THE ORONO WEEKLY TIMES 983-5301 -M-emory Lane Calendars A wonderful Christmas gift ideai Personalized calendars made from your 12 favourite photos Now available at the Orono Weekly Times 5310 Main St., Orono - (905) 983-5301 To ve a samlple calendlar, drop by our office. Order forrns can be p.icked lup- or dropped off w\eckdays 8 to 5. Orders ready fo0r pickup 'n 10 days. $24195 for- fir-st calendar--save 20(N on any iclcitionil copies (uising sarne photos). V~ rhý On