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mmmý(ý12 - Oionü Weekly -nne-s, Wedýnesday. May 19, 99 ~.NAY~r~ Arthur Black JOCKS IN OFFICE Nobody ever went broke u nde r est im at i ng the intelligence of the general pubic. Methinks the old three-ring liuckster P.T. Barnum, was bang on the money when he made the above observation. 0f course, Mr. B. lived in a less sophisticated era, when credulous rubes would pay good money to see obvious frauds like The Piltdown Man, Genuine Mermaids and other assorted circus geeks. More gullible times, righit? Don't kid yourself. We may be more scientiflcally advanced tlian the naive yokels who made P.T. Bamum rich, but our brain pans are stili the same Newtonvillie (continued from page 11) Uniform. On September 11, 1976, Sylvia set a goal for lier- self, to represent Canada at the Olympic Games. She wrote this on a scrap piece of paper and hid it under the floor boards in lier bedroom. "From that day on, that was my dream," she said, "and I knew 1 liad to train harder." She got up early in the momning to run. Because it was still dark out, lier mom drove behind lier in the car to ligit lier way. A foot injury kept Sylvia ftrm running for 2 1/2 years, "I thouglit my Olympic dream was gone," she stated.. Durmng that time -Sylvia trained in the pool by running in water. In 1983, it was announcedi that the Ladies Marathon would be an new Olympic Event in the 1984 Los Angles games. Sylvia began running 16 miles twice a day, and made it onto the Canadian Olympic team. It had been 8 years since she wrote that note hidden in the floor boards of lier bedroomi. "I went to L.A. with my country in, my heart,, but also my community," Sylvia stated. She acknowledged the hun- dreds of people who camne out to wish lier well, 6 weeks before going to the Gamnes. When the fear of disap- pointing lier country set in, Sylvia said, she found a quiet spot to read lier bible, and refo- cus. "I realized that life would still hold meaning for me regardless of how I did in the race," she said. Sylvia came in 8th place in lier race. Her reward is being able to say, "I had giveni it ail 1 had to give." In 1996 Sylvia retired from competitive run- ning. "Twenty years of athletie competition tli started liere," she" said. "Thanik youý to al who made a difference in mny life."1 size. After ail, we elect sports stars to public office, don't we? Sure. We took Red Kelly (a man who's main accomnplish- ment was standing at a blue Lune and knocking down any- body wearing the wrong colour hockey sweater) and sent him to Ottawa as a Member of Pariament. We even made a cabinet minister out orf Otto Jelinek, a man whoskated like an angel and thouglit like Attila the Hun. And we're still doing it. Earlier this year, our Prime Minister exhumed the Big M -- Frank Mahovlich -- and sumn- moned him to Ottawa. Mind you, wemay be get- ting a little smnarter -- Chretien stuck the Big M in the Senate, where lie can't do too miucli damage. The Americans suffer from the samne disease, but naturally, they do it on a grander scale. Last year, tliey handed over the keys to the Governor 's Mansion in M innesota - to an ex-WWF wrestler. Yep, Jesse 'The Body' Ventura is now governor of that state. This is a man who shaves his skull, packs a hand- gun, uised to wear feather boas in the ring, and thinks college athletes shouldn't have to attend classes so that they could concentrate on their, cross-chiecks and body slams. And how do Minnesotans féel about it? Well, it's early days and Ventura hasn't had time to screw up really bad. Besides, he's stili pretty popu- lar as a novelty. But tliere's one Minnesotan who's not too pleased:. Mister Garrison Keillor -- the 'unoficial' gover- nor of Minnesota. Keillor is a humourist and the host of a U.S, radio plie- nomenon calledý A Prairie Hlomre Companwon -- a pro- foundly corny weekly radio show that tickle,, the funny- bonies of more than 2 million radio listeners eachi week. Keillor writes the qlhow and the humour lie produces is gentie and touching -- except when he refers to Minnesota's new gov- emnor. "A great, big, honking bul- let-lieaded shoveî-faced mnutha who talks in a steroid growl" is one of Keiltor's more charita- ble assessments. Keillor has also suggested that Minnesota's leader "lias the IQ of a salad bar" and that if Governor Ventura "was any dumber, we'd have to watejr him." Ventura is smart enougli to know that in a battle of wits, heý'd be defenceless, so he's retailiated in a more sinister way. He's threatened to, with- hold state funds from ,Minesota Public Radio. He's also intiniated that he'll encourage the IRS to peek at Keillor's incomne tax retumns. Keillor's a pretty funny- looking guy him self -- well over six feet tall, given to wearing geeky coke bottle iorm rims, white suits, anid flame-red socks. But lie's flot goofing around in his antipatliy to the Governor. "The Govemnor lias said that lie owns Jet Skis and loves to get out on tliem on a quiet Sunday afternooni and ride the heli out of tliem" says Keillor. "I'm the person sitting on the porcli of a cabin on the shore, quietly wishing the person making that infernal buzzing noise would ht a dock and break a leg." Jet Skis, huli? That's good enougli for me. I'm rooting for Keillor on this one, but 1 want to be fair about it, so l'Il throw some support the Governor 's way too. n fact, l'Il bless him with that great old Show Biz bene- diction: Break a leg, Jesse. Hos*pital for Sick Children "9wear your bear"5 Each year, The Hospital for Sick Children Foundation (HSCF) creates a fine of cloth- ing called "Wear Your Bear" in support of the Sick Kids Telethon. Since the "Wear Your Bear" Program was launched in 1989, it has hielped to raise over 2.8 million in thie Greater Toronto Area. As in the years past, this colourful fine of clothing offers somnething for the entire famnily, including T-shirts, sweatshirts, denim shirts, hats, bags, and even Gund teddy bears wearing knitted Hospital for Sick Children vests. Friday, June 4th is Wear Your Bear -Day, when everyone who purchasedl the mierchan- dise is encouraged to wear it in support of the Telethon. "Wear Your Bear" merchan- dise is available at a kiosk on the main level of The Hospital for-Sick Children, during the hours of 10:00 a.mn. to 3:00 p.mn. on weekdays. Clothing can also be purchased throughi the Hospital website, at www.sickkids.oni.ca, by click- ing on the fund raising section. To order a catalogue or for more information caîl (416) 813-5400. *Wedding Cakes a4q e Cakes for ail Occasions IIIU 1 èk~ ePastries - Donuts - Pies *Bread (&,Buns &Tea Room Closed Sunlday ona Pprer-S: Gary & CaroliVreeker 9 39 7 Main Street, Orono 9 39 7 Vésit the at 1THE BOWMN VIfLLE MUSEUM 37 Silver Street MAYl19th to May 3Oth Tuesday to Sunday - il a.m. to 4 p.m. Cail 623-2734 for more information 5 14'7 Patterson Rd. Orono LOB liMO1 lpAppýy TelephJ> (905) 983-8246 eollww GARDO 100 Varieties oflHostas & Peren niais ÎC'N'Northcutt EIIiott E uneral Home THOUGHTFULNESS, SERVICE & CONCERN A Famtily Owned Business, Offerinig: Traditional Funeral Ser-vices Prearangd &Prepaid Services - Cremnation Arrangemenlts Altenatives to Traditional Funerals - Out of Towni Shipping CORY KUIPERS - PRESIDENT 53 Division Street Bowmnanville, Ontario LIC 2Z8 623-5668 OFF STREET PARKINGj Notic ePub sc eetin under the Development Charges Act In accordance with Section 4. (1) of the Development Charges Act, R.S.O. 1990, the Council of the Municipality of Clarington is holding a public meeting to receive the public's comments with respect to the proposed Development Charge By-law. Ali members of the public are invited to attend the meeting which will be held on: Monday, June 14, 1999 at 3:00 pa. Council Chambers Municipal Administrative Centre 40 Temperance Street Bowmanville, Ontario Any person who attends the meeting may make repre- sentations in respect of the proposed Development Charge By-law. A copy of the Developmpent Charges Study Report is available in the Municipal Clerk's office (between the hours of 8:30 a.m. and 4:30 p.m.) at a cost of $20.00. ONTARIO Date of Publication: May 19, 1999 Patti L. Barrie, A.M.C.T. Municipal Clerk 40 Temperance Street Bowmanville, Ontario PO. #5172 . .................. . . .. ....... ............ - , - -