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8 - Orono Weekly Times Wednesday, June 24, 2009 Basic Black by Arthur Black Hey, Suzuki - sorry about that Fame is a mask that eats the face. John Updike Shall I tell you why I don't like David Suzuki? Nah. That's so negative. First, I'll tell you why I do like Edie Falco. Then I'll tell you about my Suzuki aversion. Edie Falco? You know her - Carmela. Carmela Soprano. She of the spun-candy hairdos, the eagle talon fingernails and the Joisey accent that made me think of eagle talons scrooching down a blackboard. The Sopranos is now TV history and so is Carmela. Tony Soprano's wife has metamorphosed and moved on to a new TV series called Nurse Jackie. Falco's ditched the accent, the nails and the hairdos to play Jackie Peyton - a savvy, tough-asnails ER nurse in hospital scrubs and a butch haircut, toting a boyfriend for nooners and an eensy-weensy prescription drug habit. I haven't seen an episode of Nurse Jackie, but I'm betting that when I do I won't catch a whiff of mafia mama in Falco's performance. I'm guessing I'll barely recognize her. That's not because of the cosmetic makeover - it's because she's such a fine actor. Falco doesn't have Angelina Jolie looks or Carol Burnett timing. She can't dance like Juliet Prowse or purr out a line like Diana Krall, but she's got something more valuable and rare. Call it stage presence, or charisma, or just the It factor - but when the TV camera pans over to Edie Falco, she owns it. The rest of the cast might as well break for lunch. And now I'll tell you why I never felt much warmth for David Suzuki. It's because of something I witnessed at a luggage carousel in Vancouver airport about twenty years ago. I was at the tag end of a late night flight from Toronto waiting for my bags to be regurgitated. So were about 30 other passengers, among them David Suzuki. Well, it happens, right? How many times have you been on an airplane or at a train station when some NHL star or Ottawa politico or TV luminary practically bumps into you? Happens often enough. The correct procedure is just to go about your business - maybe fire off a little smile of recognition, but that's it. We're not in LA or on West Broadway. This is Canada, eh? We don't fuss. And we certainly don't gush. Except this time, somebody did. An earnest, redfaced, middle-aged, middle class guy walked up to Suzuki beaming like a lighthouse. He was clearly in awe. He told Suzuki how much he enjoyed The Nature of Things and how he'd never missed an edition of the radio show Quirks and Quarks and how he thought Suzuki was a Great Canadian and oughtta run for Prime Minister... And Suzuki stoned him. Just stood there, staring woodenly, waiting for the guy to stop talking and go away. After a few seconds of icy silence, the unabashed admirer got the message and slunk off. It was not a nice thing to witness. And, though it was none of my business, it pissed me off. Sure, the fan was pushing the boundaries, but he meant no harm. It would have been easy enough for Suzuki to mumble a 'thanks'. Wasn't like the guy was hitting on him or looking for a handout. In any case, it coloured my opinion of one of Canada's most illustrious citizens for, as I say, the past 20 years or so. Right up until I read an interview with the aforementioned Edie Falco. She was talking to a Globe and Mail reporter about her old TV series and what was good about it. And what was not so good about it. The Sopranos was only on the air for six years but it embedded Carmela Soprano's face onto the brainpans of hundreds of millions of people around the world. "It's hard for me to have so many people know me," Falco says. "I'm a private person. In the morning, I'm walking my dog, I'm taking my kids to school, I've got my hat on. But people are going, 'Oh my god - it's you!' and they want some kind of equally excited response. I used to feel obligated to join them 'OH, THANK YOU!' I'm feeling less obligated now, and I'm afraid it makes me come across as being cold or unkind or ungrateful, which is not the case. It's just a way of holding on to your selfness." Yeah. I guess I never thought of that. Bob Dylan is both more famous and blunter about celebrity. "Just because you like my stuff" Dylan says, "doesn't mean I owe you anything." Good point. And Suzuki? Sorry about the twenty-year misunderstanding, man. 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