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Wednesday, September 23, 2009 Orono Weekly Times - 3 Opinion by Robert MacDonald Dumber than a Chicken! As Canadians we stand collectively when ever our anthem is played, at sporting events and such, and belt out, "we stand on guard for thee", but as I picked up a dozen eggs, I suddenly thought, "it's really the number 12 that stands on guard for thee." This brave little number is our last connection, with my beloved Imperial measurement system, that those of us of a certain age all grew up with! It's the last soldier left standing, following a numerical cleansing, unleashed in it's full fury upon us, by none other than the infamous, Pierre Elliott Trudeau! Isn't it amazing that a simple chicken could stand up against the politically correct of this nation! A chicken lays a dozen, count 'em 12 eggs, and then stops laying to hatch her clutch. This little bird doesn't buy into that metric crap, and as a result we can still buy a dozen eggs, a dozen beer, or a dozen donuts! - Doh! The number 12 doesn't stop there! We have the 12 disciples, the 12 months of the year, and as we all know the 12 days of Christmas, and Alcoholics Anonymous has the 12 step program! Look at all the good things we have, that are associated with this brave little number, that stands up to the metric system, and says "back off Jack!" Most males have feet about 12 inches long, there's 12 ounces in a pint, and there isn't anybody brave enough to mess with our pint! We aspire to be 6 feet tall, and pray they'll bury us 6 feet under, for another total of 12! Those that attend post secondary school, graduate from grade 12! Why even our analog clocks go up to 12. But don't be fooled, the metric system tried to challenge our clocks as well. They introduced metric time in France in 1793, when they unleashed the rest of the metric madness upon us, but the people wouldn't use it! There was to be 100 seconds in a minute, 100 minutes in a hour and 10 hours in a day, so that noon would be at 5:00. No A.M, no P.M, and 12 minutes into a new day, would have been prefaced without an hour! Part of the resistance to this novel concept, was that the common folk didn't have watches or clocks, but relied on the town clocks, which people were reluctant to alter because of the cost! Consequently after three years they abandoned metric time, because the people just wouldn't use it. There was the 12 tribes of Israel, and a colour wheel has 12 hues of colour on it. Then of course as we all know there are 12 signs of the zodiac and 12 animals in the Chinese calendar. Most of us have 12 pairs of ribs, our decks of cards have 12 face cards and everyone has heard of the dirty dozen! Hopefully none of us will ever have to stand before a jury, of 12 of our peers! While our simple barnyard chicken may have no concept of how to figure triangulation, or logarithims, obviously she knows how to count to 12. Consequently we have a dozen! That brave little number 12, that stands before the metric system, and will not be shoved aside! Imagine being shoved aside by a system which apparently "makes so much sense"! A system base on the meter! The meter, which represents 1/10,000 of a a quarter of the meridian, which runs through Paris!?????? It might as well be 1/10,000 of a henweigh! What's a henweigh, you ask about 5 or 6 POUNDS! This is the same meter, that is off by 2/1000 of an INCH, from representing 1/10,000 of a quarter of the meridian! John Berry (L) and Laurie Schmid (R) serve up BBQ burgers at the Durham County Farmer's Co-op Customer Appreciation Day held on Saturday. WE WILL BE SHOWING MADAGASCAR - ESCAPE 2 AFRICA THURSDAY OCTOBER 1ST STARTING AT DUSK! Where: CLARKE HIGH SCHOOL SOCCER FIELD ADMISSION: A Non-Perishable Food Item for the local FOOD BANK Snacks will be available to purchase · OPEN TO THE PUBLIC CL ARKE MOVIE NIGHT ~ Happenings ~ Thursday, September 24, 2009 - OHS Fall Flower & Vegetable Show, Orono United Church, 7:30pm. Frank Kershaw speaks on Successful Front and Sideyard Landscaping. see ad pg.11 Saturday, September 26, 2009 Orono Chili Cook-Off & Pie Contest - Main St., Orono, entertainment, silent auction, games. www.visitorono.com Saturday, September 26, 2009 Country Dance - Newtonville Town Hall, 8pm featuring Emily Creek Band, $10 per person. Lunch provided. Call 905-786-2507 Saturday October 3rd Tyrone Seniors Bazaar & Penny Sale - Tyrone Community Centre, doors open at noon.Crafts, baking, vegetables, raffles, light lunch. $2. admission. Saturday October 3rd Walk For Dog Guides - Newcastle, Call 905-987-3980 for more info. Sunday, October 18, 2009 - Tea Granny and Friends 10th Anniversary - Light luncheon and Tea with a visit from Queen Victoria. Newcastle Town Hall, 1pm. Call 905-983-5816