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12 - Orono Weekly Times 1937 - 2012 · Celebrating 75 Years Wednesday, October 31, 2012 From The House At The Centre Of The Universe Where did I leave my hollowed out skull? Conversation at the House this week has been a little on the weird side. It's not every day you have an exchange that starts with, "Have you seen my foot anywhere?" and ends with, "It's under your bed with the rest of your severed limbs!" yep, it has definitely been a bizarre few days. Of course it all started more than a month ago when another odd conversation that I hope was not overheard by my neighbours began, " Can you bring my skull in from the back seat of the car?" and was followed up with, "bring the gravestones too." But then not every week consists of standing out in the pouring rain nailing stakes into the ground and erecting grave stones. Naturally, it is that time of year once more; Halloween. The only time of the year when children with their faces covered in blood, scars and unusual amounts of facial hair will not drive you to call Children's Aid immediately. Every year at the House, Halloween seems to have become bigger and bigger in terms of the amount of work involved. I think the first year there may have been a couple of spooky lights and some caution tape and now it's a production that any horror movie producer would be proud o f . There have been moments that I thought we might have overdone the haunted house on the hill motif a little, like a couple of years ago when a mother patiently tried to persuade her tiny Cat in the Hat to walk up the garden path to grab a fist full of candy. Try as she might the terrified little Cat was having none of it. I did feel guilty about that. When I was a kid I had two conflicting experiences of Halloween. Growing up for a while in Bermuda the North American influence was strong and as we had quite a few American neighbours for a few brief years there was dressing up and copious amounts of candy available. Then our family moved back to England and October 31st would roll around. We kids waited in anticipation and were devastated when we were told by some pompous ass of a teacher that, "British children are not encouraged to go `trick or treating'. The sneering emphasis they put on the phrase was enough to convince me even as a kid that my countrymen could use a good fright night to scare the stick from out of their derrières. These days' British kids embrace it with gusto. Once back in North America as an adult with a kid of my own it was a joy to figure out what costume to get for him every year, even if some years it had to fit over a snow suit. Although I have to admit that the year our son and his buddies all came home with two full trash bags of candy each I did suspect that perhaps things were getting a little out of hand. When Halloween falls on a weekend that level of candy stash rationed in the right way is pretty harmless, dental cavities notwithstanding, but when it fell on a week day, as it does this year, I did pity the poor teachers the next morning having to deal with classrooms full of kids hyped up on an overload of sugary treats and breathless to share their spooky experiences with all and sundry while the teacher was attempting to take class. This year the spectre at the feast looks like it might be Hurricane Sandy. With predicted wind gusts in the GTA threatening to be as much as 100 kilometres an hour our graveyard could be all over the neighbourhood by morning and most of the Dorothy's and Toto's blown all the way to Kansas. I'm keeping everything crossed that it doesn't happen. As there is no more time for preparation all that is left now is to put out the treats ready for the frightening hoards. Now where did I leave my hollowed out skull?