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Gazebo 2000 project A project to construct a 14 foot cedar gazebo at the Bowmanville Hospital received donations from two fronts Tuesday morning. The Bowmanville Horticultural Club donated $2,000, and CUPE Local 137 donated a $3,000 cheque to the project. To date, just over $10,000 of the $14,000 project price has been raised. The gazebo will provide a place at the Hospital, of solitude, for patients, family and friends and staff to sit and enjoy the outdoors. outdoors. * Pictured - left to right, Helen Pultz - Local 137 member, Heinz Netten - Bowmanville Horticultural Society, Chris Kooy, - Chief Operating Officer, Diane Hawarth - Bowmanville Horticultural Society. Seated - Jean Williams - member of Hospital Residence Council. Durham & York farm news Fields of Profit Livestock producers use over one million acres of pasture pasture land to provide an economical economical source of nutrition within their production systems. systems. Much of this land is best suited to pasture due to limiting factors of topography, topography, soil texture and soil strutiture. Good pastures, however, are a result of consistent consistent good management in terms of fertility'and grazing. Any successful business requires , investment to remain sustainable. Aside from the obvious area of finances, management training training is one of the best and most rewarding areas that a ' business can invest into. The same is true.for a farm operator. operator. There are many sources of accurate and reliable information information from resource publications publications to the internet that can assist the farm manager to gain new management skills and information. One of the most effective sources is at local producer meetings where you can meet other farm managers, industry experts and hear first hand about the successes and failures failures of particular production systems. One such meeting will be at the Douro Community Centre on Friday, March 3rd beginning at 6:30 p.m. Fields of Profit is a pasture meeting and trade-' show sponsored by OMAFRA, Ontario Cattleman's Association, OATI, Grace On, New Liskeard Agricultural Research Station and others. The keynote speaker is Dr. Woody Lane, an internationally internationally known livestock nutritionist nutritionist from Oregon. He operates operates an independent consulting firm, teaches forage forage and livestock nutrition courses, facilitates a forage study group, and writes a popular column- in The Shepherd magazine. Jim Johnson, forage and sheep researcher at the New Liskeard Agricultural Research Station, will also be a feature speaker. The New Liskeard program is well- known for work on low cost sheep production methods such as stockpile grazing, rotational grazing systems, and pasture lambing, as well as evaluating new forage species and annual forage crops. Jim's presentation includes: "Stretching The Season" - Some unconventional grazing grazing crops like com, turnips, winter cereals and second crop cerçals offer alternatives for summer slumps or extended grazing. Evènt brochures and registration registration forms can bç obtained from the OMAFRA office. Port Perry at 905-985- 2003 or 1-800-263-8023. Subscribe to the Orono Weekly Times by Arthur Black FAITH, HOPE AND CHASTITY We humans have spawned a lot of stupid inventions during our brief, brisk frolic across the surface surface of this planet. To wit: golf; men's neckties; women's bras (let's put the, clasp at the back to really drive them nuts!); daytime TV; Rap music; Donald Trump... And chastity, belts. Chastity, belts. Think about those little beauties for a moment: A guy says to his sweetie 'I love you dearly, but I couldn't stand it if anyone else loved you as dearly while I was out of town, therefore I've come up with this swell genital harness of leather and steel that I want you to wear perpetually', perpetually', 'So that you'll think of me. Every time you go to the bathroom'. You probably assume that chastity belts are merely merely a bizarre aberration of the Middle Ages, right? A grim and unenlightened time when doddery old Nobles who happened to be married to buxom young lasses needed a way to insure spousal : fidelity, whilst they (the menfolk) were overseas bravely and selflessly crusading against the Heathen Swine? Well, you're half-right. The concept of chastity belts did indeed first surface surface in the European con- - sciousness back around the • time of The Crusades, when chain-mailed do- gooders from Britain, France and the so-called Low Countries were merrily galloping galloping around the Middle East, crossing'swords with Saladin and his gang. And being seriously sexually sexually deprived into the bargain. bargain. Sexual deprivation leads to deep thoughts about fidelity, chastity and all that. No doubt, those horny nobles though long and hard (sorry) about the ladies they'd left behind. The idea of enforced sexual fidelity was a powerful powerful one - especially for males, who were well aware of their own libidinal limitations, but were never quite sure when their mates would cry "Enough!" And so. the chastity belt came into vogue - and flourished through the Middle Ages, right up until the 19th century. As a matter matter of fact, as late as 1848 there was a twisted Scottish medical doctor who sincerely sincerely advocated the use of chastity belts as. a preventive preventive against, 1 ahem; self- abuse. ■ Be that as it may, the contorted concept of Chastity Belts, in an age of Morning- .After Pills, Madonna Videos and testimonials testimonials from US President Bill Clinton .has thrived so much so that I am- reluctantly reluctantly constrained to report upon the evolution of Chastity Belt for (ouch ) men. It's"true. A manufacturing manufacturing , company in Nevada is marketing CB- 2000 - a light weight plastic cage that fits around the male ahem ahems,' secures them with a brass padlock and insures that they don't get up to any extra-curricular extra-curricular hanky panky. Does it work? Hey, it not only works, it's transport friendly. friendly. ■ Says one enthusiastic harness-ee: "Take my word for it, (the male chastity device ) -is secure, comfortable, . restrictive and airport safe. 1 don't even know that it's there." Ratlier puts me in mind of the medieval laird of the Highlands, who, upon being called up for service in the crusades, called his most trusted, loyal fellow noble to his side and said: "Nigel, 1 am off to The Wars, ahd know not when 1 shall return. I realise that behind me, I am leaving a young and earthy wife, and that is why 1 called you here to accept this key. Whereupon the departing knight confers a large brass key upon his colleague, explaining that this is the Key of Fidelity binding his ' young wife to the Lord, and to guard it with his life. The friend bows, acknowledging the profundity profundity of the request. The knight departs for the Middle East. Two days and two nights later our hero is in transit, crouching at a bivouac one evening, when suddenly the peace is shattered by the thunder of clattering hoofbeats. It's our Lord's best friend, who has galloped these last two days full out, in order to intercept his friend, the Knight. * ves the man dismounts, dismounts, thrusts forth a bronze key and cries "Sire, sire! You gave me the wrong key ! ", Let us help finance your dreams! 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