Clarington Digital Newspaper Collections

Orono Weekly Times, 8 Nov 2000, p. 13

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Chef Marc Beranger and his wife Beth of the Newcastle Community Church, prepared a superb Italian dinner for the Church's fundraising dinner Sunday evening. The evening was presented as 'An Italian Night to Remember' and featured Italian cuisine - Lasagna, Pasta Prima Vera, Salad and Italian Bread, and a program of Italian music. BASIC BLACK ARTHUR BLACK AND YOUR NAME ' WOULD BE...? Ay, caramba, deadline bat for Lee, Harvey. Or looms and I cannot find the Oswald. A Louisianan no quote, «but trust me on this account ex-Marine, bom in one: once upon a time, 1939 and adorned serendipi- Marshall MacLuhan, that tously With all three Merlin of Canadian monikers, managed to marry Consciousness pronounced a passing acquaintance with a something to the effect that: mail-order rifle and a A person's name is like a Presidential Cavalcade into an. curse: a pronouncement historical rendezvous, that they will carry with them And in that marriage, man- to the grave. aged to insure that no sentient , Okay? That said, let us North American neo-parent consider Bruce. And Arnold. t would, for the forseeable Not to mention Ralph. . future, think of encumbering In the 1950's (trust me -- I his or her offspring with the was there) The most popular names Lee, Harvey, 1 or boys names to tag a newborn Oswald, lad with were John, Robert, You've got to be careful James, Michael, David, what you name your kid. It Stephen, William, Richard, can come back to haunt you Thomas and Mark. both. I'm sure that, prior to By the 70's, the prefer- President Nixon's disastrous ences had "morphed to include reign, Richard was considered Matthew, Brian, Christopher, an excellent male moniker. Jeffrey and Daniel. ( And have you noticed how And in the nether reaches few Canadian newborn boys of the century we had carry the name Brian these descended to Duane, Todd, days? Stuart and Brad. But that could change: But no one was going to There \yas a time when Orono Weekly Times* Wednesday, November 8, 2000 ~ 13 Arnold was considered a wussy name. A monosyllabic monosyllabic Austrian, with polysyllabic muscles who answered to the name Herr Schwarzenegger changed all that. When I was a kid, the name 'Bruce' was sniggered at -- thought to be just a tad 'fey', Messrs Springsteen and Wrllis turned that around. And then there's Ralph. What good words can you possibly say about the name Ralph? The most famous Ralph in the history of popular popular culture? Ralph Kramden, the sad sack, red-faced, overweight overweight and usually idiotic bus driver portrayed by Jackie Gleason in The Honeymooners. Ralph -- a name so sad that it has became a synonym for booze-induced nausea -- "No kidding, Tiffaney, after three of those Margueritas, I was ralphirig into the aspidistras." Ralph. A tragically unfortunate unfortunate name to lumber a child with. Until you think about it a bit. What about Ralph Lauren, the fashion thingy? And Ralph Fiennes, the Hollywood leading man? Has anyone noticed that there is a Ralph currently running running for election to the Oval Office? To wit, Ralph Nader, the world's most famous consumer consumer advocate and perennial gadfly on the butt of the American body politic. And speaking of gadflies (or butts, your choice) -- what about Canada's own Ralph Klein? I think Ralph is coming back to claim it's rightful place within the pantheon of righteous male names. But then that's the thing about names. Even if you pick a good one, you can never be sure what the vagaries of history will do to it. Sometimes it doesn't take the weight of history. Sometimes a well-turned phrase will do the trick. You don't hear the name Chauncey much anymore do. you? The reason for that might be an exchange that occurred between U.S. President William Howard Taft and one 1 Senator Chauncey Depew about 90 years ago. President Taft was a dirigible of a man, so huge in girth he had to have a bathtub specially made to accommodate his girth. Senator Depew on the other hand was a man with substantial substantial gonads -- so much so that he dared to twit the President about his size. One time he had the temerity to ask the president if he 'was expecting a boy or a girl', and what he would name it. President Taft looked at the Senator and intoned "If it's a boy, I'll call it John. If it's a girl, I'll call it Mary." "But if, as 1 expect, it is just wind, I'll 1 call it Chauncey." 100th anniversary gala for the lung association Eat, drink and be merry "We are delighted with this with CFTO's Lance Brown, year's auction. Among the honourary host of The Lung many donations is a limited Association's 4th annual edition golf print auto- Christmas Seals Soiree on graphed by PGA star John Thursday, November 23rd at Daly, and a beautifully deco- Camp Samac in Oshawa. rated 7 foot Christmas tree The evening's features compliments of White Rose," include silent and balloon says Sheri Cotton, auction prizes, music by The Development Co-ordinator. Hamstrings of Durham, Tickets are $50 per persist persist Bill Saunders, and son, and are selling fast. All samplings by Ocala Orchards funds raised will aid the fight Farm Winery, Black Oak against lung disease in Brewing Co. of Oakville, The Durham Region. To reserve Nutty Chocolatier and an or purchase tickets, please array of scrumptious hors call 436-1046. d'oeuvres. ORONO CHIROPRACTIC and EXERCISE CENTRE Ernest Schroeder, B.Sc. D.C. Doctor of Chiropractic 5331 Main Street, Box 150, Orono LOB 1M0 Telephone (905) 983-5510 Annual Free Fall, at The Bowmanvillé Museum 37 Silver Street Friday, November 10th • 6:30 to 8:30 p.m. -FREE ADMISSION - Musical Entertainment • Refreshments Call (905) 623-2734 for more information y ou are invited to cm OCcCe Fashioned Christmas in Friday, November TO, - 36 10 am. to 9 pm. || Saturdayj November 25, || 10 a.m. - 5 p.m. Browse through o'ur century home, decked'in W& YufetMe fare and enjoy the ambiance of yesteryear, Visit our newty expanded country shop, filled with the treasures you love. ■ » Featuring: SÉf Pine Furnishings « Period Reproductions ' Sjs Country Victorian Accents • Christmas Decor |HjI The Wooden Carousel || 905 Regional Road 42 (Clarh-Darlingtoh Townfine) £jj$ Bowmanville, Ontario • (905) 697-0919 %tgular Store iHdurs: gjg Tiffs.' - Sat. 10 aim. - 5 p.m. San. 1 p.m. - 5 p.m.

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