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Wednesday, September 7, 2005 Basic Black by Arthur Black Evolution? Watch your mouth America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anyone else in the world who tries to make ùs uncomfortable. Hunter S. Thompson Ah, Mister T., thou shouldst be living at this hour. Unfortunately, that option is not in the Tarot cards. Hunter S. Thompson blew his own brains out in the kitchen of his fortified com pound in Woody Creek, Colorado last February. The drug-chugging, gun-toting, invective- slinging colossus of Gonzo journalism, whose motto was "When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro", finally had to say 'uncle' to Uncle Sam and throw in the towel. His country got too weird even for him. I'm sure the folks at Imax know exactly how he felt. You know Imax? One of the great Canadian cinematic success sto ries. Imax is to movies as the Brontosaurus is to the lizard family, which is to say huge, unforgettable unforgettable and famous around the world. Imax was the brain-child of three Canadian film makers who got together after Expo 67 to work on a concept they called 'giant-screen technology'. technology'. Simply put, they came up with a complicated complicated method of projecting projecting a film on a screen ten times the size of a conventional conventional movie screen. Anyone who has ever seen the result will never forget it. Imax films are drop-jaw gorgeous and } incredibly lavish, with vertigo-inducing shots from helicopters and close-up encounters with wildlife and scenery that are enough to give cinema-goers the vapours. If there's a knock on Imax films, it would be that the scripts are Reader's Digest bland. They don't rock any boats. That's because Imax films are inordinately inordinately expensive to produce. produce. Consequently, they have to appeal to the widest (read lowest- common-denominator) audience possible. And that's the reason Imax films never, ever offend anybody. Until now. Imax is in deep trouble trouble south of the border. Classified Business Directory space week one yearl Call now to book 905-983-5301 LARRY JACKSON PLUMBING & WATER CONDITIONING • Rump Repairs & Installation • UV Lights • Water Softeners • Free Estimates For Friendly, Export Service Cell 905-983-6214 m ilii li in ■Ill 1 Wre here to serve you" ROBERT E. 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Honouring the future. • Planning • Inquiries • Plot & Niche Sales • Rental of Chapel for Services For more information call 905-983-5908 or 905-983-9571 Clarington Beech Centre 26 Beech Ave., BowmanvHle Modem Facility Historical Satting Weddings, Banquets, Meetings (30 to 250 people) Self-catering kitchen. per CHATTERTON ELECTRIC RESIDENTIAL • COMMERCIAL • INDUSTRIAL POLE LINE CONSTRUCTION Dive Chatterton Orono, Ontario Tel: 906-983-5646 If no «newer: 906-983-6940 Theatres in several US states--including some theatres attached to science science museums--are refusing to show several Imax films on grounds that sound like something something out of the Salem Witch Trials. The objectors objectors claim that the Imax films are blasphemous. What sort of films are we talking about? Well, Cosmic Voyage, for one. It's an animated journey through the universe. Then there's Galapagos, a documentary about the famous islands where the incredible variety of wildlife led. Charles Darwin to begin formulating formulating his famous theory. And there's another Imax film called Volcanoes of the Deep Sea, which is all about strange creatures that flourish near hot air vents at the bottom of the ocean. Why have these films attracted the attention of America's self-appointed self-appointed censors? Not because Transfer Station Moa'Rt8-5>SatuNay8-12l HANDY MANNS1 !L; New Home Construction I Renovation Reproductions Cedar Products 905-983-5633 or 5341 !Z^ZZZZZZIS1 you'll never hear that in an Imax film. It's because they use the E-word. They talk about 'evolution'--and evolution is profoundly potty-mouth talk in George W. Bush's America. The odd thing is, the USA has already had to sit through this movie. More than 80 years ago the state of Tennessee put a 24-year-old science science teacher named John Scopes on trial for daring to teach Darwin's Theory of Evolution to his students. Famous lawyer Clarence Darrow defended Scopes and technically lost the trial, but he exposed the inherent inanity of the prosecution -case and humiliated Scopes' prosecutor, prosecutor, William Jennings Bryan, to the point that Biyan actually died five days after the trial ended. Where's Clarence Darrow when we need him? BLACK see page 9 ip |F they use the F-word-- (SENIOR CITIZENS AND THE PHYSICALLY DISABLED SIDEWALK AND DRIVEWAY WINDROW SNOW CLEARING PROGRAM The Municipality of Clarington is offering senior citizens 65 years of age and over and the physically disabled a snow clearing service on municipal sidewalks and for [driveway windrows adjacent to single family dwellings, which includes semi-detached, link housing and row housing in the urban areas of Bowmanville, Courtice, Orono, Newcastle Village and in the Hamlets of Bond Head, Newtonville, Tyrone, Leskard, Haydon, Kendal, Solina, Hampton, Burketon, Enniskillen, Maple Grove, Enfield, Mitchell Comers and Kirby. The snow clearing service on munici pal sidewalks will start after a snow fall lends and only when there is more than 1 inch of snow on sidewalks. The resident/homeowner resident/homeowner must provide material (sand or salt) on the sidewalk as needed. The driveway windrow snow clearing I service will not be undertaken until the snow ploughing on all Municipal streets has been completed and are not called out for 6 inches or less. If vou require access to vour driveway or sidewalks before our service is activated, it isM home owner's responsibility. [Tn ha eligible for this service, applicants must be 65 years of age or older or be physically disabled, occupy a single family [dwelling which fronts onto a Town street in the specified urban areas of the specified hamlets, and have no able bodied persons I under the age of 65 years residing on thft property. Senior citizens must provide a photo copy of a birth certificate or Senior Citizens Card; physically [disabled applicants must provide a doctor's certificate each year. I Application Forms can be obtained from the Operations Department, 2320 Taunton Road or at the Municipal Administrative Centre, Customer Service Reception Desk at 40 Temperance Street In Bowmanville, or by calling 905-263-2291. If you wish to verify that you quali-| Ify for the service, please contact the Operations Department at the above phone number. I All applicants who were approved last winter will receive I a 2005-2006 application In the mail. All applicants must reapply each winter season and provide the appropriate documentation. All applications should be completed and returned to the Municipality of Clarington, Operations (Department on or before October 14,2006. Applications may not be accepted after that date. i » I!;