The following text may have been generated by Optical Character Recognition, with varying degrees of accuracy. Reader beware!

THE COLBORNE EXPRESS, COLBORNE, ONT, NOVEMBER 4, 1948 WHAT60ES ON " IN THE , WOULD j ^NorrnanBlair Great Britain Many years ago there was a popular song entitled "It Isn't What You Used To Be But What You Are Today"; and that seems just about to express \he sentiments of the British Conservative Party, or at least some members thereof, regarding Winston Churchill, their Mr. Churchill is indubitably one of the great men of our time-- perhaps of all time; but while admitting all that, the Tories wish he would devote a little less time to his literary activities, and a little more to showing his party the way back Writing of the recent Conservative conference in Wales, a cprres-pondent of the Toronto Financial Post tells of the conqueror's reception accorded to Mr. Churchill, and of cheering so vociferous that the seagulls got frightened and made off in all directions. In spite of this, the writer says, Mr. Churchill "remains personal problem Number One to the Tories" pointing out that during the 11-day Parliamentary session in September, Winston remained . in France--where he is engaged on the second volume of his war memoirs, which will take many months to complete -- and neveT Speared at all at Westmin- . The Conservatives fear that the Socialist Party will make full capital of Churchill's busying himself with the recording of history, instead of making history as leader of the Opposition. Winston is immensely popular, but the voters know that any Government which replaces the Socialists will have to face internal problems as well as international ones. "They will want to know who is to be skipper of the ship for the full voyage, not merely the pilot to take it through the narrows," the already-quoted writer goes on to state. "In spite of the enthusiasm and (personal) loyalty at Llandudno, the chances of a Tory victory at the polls are not as' bright as they were a year ago." Scandinavia In Norway, Sweden and Denmark the people are hoping for the best, but still preparing for the worst. The Norwegian capital, Oslo, has been buzzing with economic experts working out a four-year plan in connection with the Aid to Europe business; and hardly had they departed when their rooms were taken over by Danish and Swedish Military authorities come to discuss Scandinavian defense plans in case of war. This current meeting is not expected, however, to result in any formal military pact, which would have to be first discussed by each of the three parliaments and then ratified. But there are many technical details that must be worked out before such a pact could even be formulated and it is these that the military authorities had met to talk over. In case of conflict, the Norwegians are convinced that Scandinavia cannot defend itself against Russia without outside help. They are also determined not to let any defense measures hold back economic reconstruction of their country. Except by depleting the manpower necessary for industry and agriculture, Norway's 3 million inhabitants cannot maintain many men under arms. That is why the Home Guard was formed almost two years ago. It now numbers 125,000 of whom 70,000 are volunteers between 18 and 65 years of age, ■with another, 40,000 being recruits completing their compulsory military training. The home guard is organized to neutralize enemy attacks by airborne troops and saboteurs and hold off the enemy forces until regular troops take over. With specialized training and intimate knowledge of their own localities, the home guard represents an auxiliary to the armed forces which it is estimated would include instantly about half the entire population of the country if Norway were attacked. How determined the people are not to be caught napping is seen in the fact that when the home guard was formed only about 30,-000 volunteers were expected. This number was far more than doubled the very first year. Just For Fun ^ravelling through a small vil-I lage, during a political campaign, the British economist, Sir Josiah ] Stamps, came upon two little girls standing before a modest cottage. They were identical in j appearance, so the distinguished visitor inquired if they were "No, sir," one of them replied. "Really?" rejoined Sir Josiah. "How old. are you?" "We're both five." "Dear me," said the statesman, "both five, and not twins! How do • . manage it?" The little girl who had been giving the answers smiled. • "Please sir," she replied," we're triplets. Annie's indoors." Grandpa and Grandma are "Raising the Roof"--Although this Georgia couple, "Grandma" and "Grandpa" Branan are 71 and 69 years old respectively, they didn't let considerations of age stop them from building a new house -- and doing so doesn't appear to bother them as much as it does some of the neighbors who fear that one of the oldsters may slip from the high perch. It's the 16th house the pair have built since 1910 which is probably some sort of a record. Some of their grandchildren are seen looking on. Most sports, these days, suffer from over-emphasis. This condition isn't nearly so bad here in Canada as it is south of the border. Still, it's bad enough; and there's something decidedly screwey in a setup where a football or hockey star gets ten times more publicity --and is known to a hundred times more people--than the men who represent our country at the United Nations, and whose decisions may be responsible for involving us in another war. In the States lately college football has been getting a lot of unusual publicity--all of it bad. There was, for instance, a "Picture of the Week" in Life Magazine showing two Holy Cross linesmen who had allowed the ball to roll a few inches over the enemy goal-line instead of "grounding" it just outside. The expressions on their faces couldn't have registered more despair and tragedy had they been looking at the massacre of Lidice or the Nazi gassing of a few thousand European children. Frankly, it made us feel just a little sick at the stomach, to think that supposedly grown-up men should act, in public, in such a childish fashion over what, after all, was nothing but a game. If that's where our college football is head-for, we suggest that they substitute jacks or marbles instead. Then there was the article in The Saturday Evening Post by Mrs. Harry Stuhldreher, wife of the coach at Wisconsin. It's too long to quote here; but it's decidedly worth reading as an almost unbelievable tale of what happens, not only to a coach who comes up with a losing team, but to his wife and family as well. Commenting on the story editorially--under the title "Football's Dirty Linen Sometimes Shows", The Post has some interesting things to say. "For more than ten years every literate American has known that college football stars, despite purity codes and pious protestations, are pajd for their ser-i either by the college or by alumni groups"--"For more than twenty years at least fifty college football factories have been far more deeply concerned in staging commercial entertainment than most Broadway promoters. Apparently these colleges see nothing paradoxical about asserting their simon-purity, while at the same time they frankly commercialize their "amateurs" by selling radio and television rights, advertising, maintaining press agfents and otherwise stimulating the "gate"--just like other carnival hustlers." There's a lot more along the same line, and the whole thing should be "required reading" for all who have the good Canadian college sport at heart. Some say, of course, "it couldn't happen here." The answer is that it has been happening-- and still is--only on a comparatively minor scale. But just give us CUTS, BURNS and BRUISES Healing, Soothlngand Antiseptic. Dr. Chases Ointment brings quick,relief. Regular Size Dr. Chase's Ointment ISSUE 45 - 1948 j Then there was a piece in The New Yorker regarding a Mr. Lou Little--a gentleman who, in case you don't already know, is football coach at Columbia University. Just a few random quotations might be of some interest as illustrating what it means to be a college coach-- or a college player--when football really gets to be "big time." "Except for a two month vacation in summer, the football season for Little lasts the year around. He meets with some or all of his ten assistant coaches as often in February as he does in October. They all spend a good part of their time in a dark room during the winter and spring, studying motion pictures of the previous season's games. Day after day, week after week, month after month they study every move by every player in every game." "In addition to sitting through these films, Little- may call his coaches into his office for a conference as many as three times a day.--At almost any hour of the day, even if it is only three months after the conclusion of one football season and six months before the start of the next one, a visitor may come upon Little's three chief assistants hovering outside his office waiting to be admitted." "When football practice at last gets underway--Little and his assistants are immensely relieved. Many months of planning and anticipation are behind them and they are facing the real thing. The squad begins practice early in September; and during the first three weeks, before .the opening university, the boys put in seven hours a day. Coal miners seldom work harder.--All day long there is the thud of body against body, the impact of 200 pounds smashing head on into 200 pounds, and sometimes, when the boys get up off the ground, they spit out teeth or an arm hangs misshapen and inert." business OPPOKTTJnj combination World's Trouble Spots--South Korea (No. 1 on this newsmap) was recently placed under martial law following a rebellion involving 2500 Communist members of the Constabulary there. Accused of a plot -- which failed -- to assassinate the President, nine suspects were arrested. ■ At the same time Russian troops were reported evacuating North Korea (2) but leaving behind a native "People's" Army numbering 200,000. The rebellion started at Yosu (3). But that should be enough to give you a general idea. A lot more than enough, we imagine some of you saying. In the past it's been the fashion for Canada to follow the lead of the United States in a great many activities. This is one where we might very well go our own way, or even get back to the Idea of college sport that prevails in the mother country. OPPORTUNITIES f. 10K sale HI-POWERED RIFLES Write .for new lists and prices. ^ scope sales co. oi BE A HAIRDRESSER Pleasant dignified profession, good wages), logue free. y Write or Calf'*" "***' MARVEL HAIRDRESSINO SCHOOLS 358 Bloor St. W.. Toronto Branches^ 4 4 King St.. Hamilton W HARDBOARD 4x8 Sheets 10c PER SQUARE FOOT ^ asbestos" building* scptp1lvflcos' PURE WOOL YARNS "be YOUR own BEAUTICIAN". The new "Sequence Creams" include six essential* and instructions for^Home^Pacials^and regula* Gift gCash^ or C.O.d. Evelyn* Davies, ""If PAINT. $3.50 per gallon Painters. Drop Sheets, all sizes, various grades. Roofing Material, Insulabrick Siding, Roof Coatings. Utility Company, 846 King St. E.. Toronto. patents RAISE HAMSTERS, "Toy Bears". Canada's FETHERSTONAUGH a Company, Patent Solicitors. Established 1890, 14 King West, Toronto. Booklet of Information on request. pKNOW THE^TRUTH,ABOUT^ FAIR'S HONEY No. 1 WHITE CLOVER HONEY. 12 4-Ib. tins. $12.00. J. A. l'-alr. Trenton, Ont.. 2. mmM™ireJtnwt1^ Write^M?3 Joseph, "TH TULIPS. Rainbow collection of fine varieties. LOT-BeetrheLab™ratori'es, ^T^Granvfne^ltreet •j Bear Traps, ^ animal baits.^ scents, rifles, shotguns, scopes, PHOTOGRAPHY CrySjtaYOUR FIRST ROLLB 20c ^ itad?o,ScVys?a?eBe^ PAINTS, excellent duality, exterior and toper gallon. Mail money order or shipped COD. Immediate delivery. Dominion PainI Company, 255 Parliament Street, Toronto. WANTED WANTED quantity of large willow tree*. ^E^Hanger ot Can. Ltd., 85 King Street SoleV^l^ Fa m T t TRfAClf a M del Tracto/by5Mail!"Wire^or*Phone,°to ^atematt THRESHERS - HAY PRESSES PROMPT DELIVERY th™vUMoSodye&SSons ^o.T Tenebmne*'Oae**1' --*--- In A Quandary "Why are you crying?" "Father called mother a waddling g°"Well?" "Mother called father a stupid "But why are you crying?" "Well, what am I?" OSHAWA PROPERTY FOR SALE ARMY HUT WINDOWS REG'LAR FELLERS--It Could Happen--There By GENE BYRNES