THE DAILY BR Tish "WHIG' SWEATER COATS | 7725p We have our new stock of Sweater By 'Samuel Hottenstein Coats now on display. Our cat he keeps, while mortals fuss, Sweaters, Sweater Coats, Sweaters | Pepetual tryst with Morph--e--us; with and without V Necks. While we perspire and labor, he Stretches in feline luxury, All the different weights and shades. .~ Prices to please all. Troubling no whit his furry head About the uses of his bed. George VanHorne's 21 george v Phone 362w. I've seen him, and subdued my curses, Loll lazily upon my verses, Proving, a mind that's analytic {Is not essential to a eritic-- | Well, anyhow, his pleasant time | Imperially o'ertops my rhyme; He knows, as mortal men do not, The uses of a sunny spot, Where I have seen him brush his dome With his own natural cat-a-comb, Nor seem to give a catty care Who rules the ocean or the air, Nevertheless, I argue that 1 do not want to be a cat Hunt mice, and paw an empty head, And die nine times before I'm dead. : TR HHH Hurts | English Hall-marked Silver No Rest. "Now that you have inherited all that money, I presume -you will take life easy." | "Im afraid not. | to get into society." English --Isaac Anderson. Silver-Plate We have just received a very attractive shipment from England. Some eyes are extremely sen- Hi sitive to light. For such Hi patients we supply special Jj lenses that prevent the harmful i rays of light from entering the |i eyes. , If the movies, bright lights, «|i "travelling on the water or by [i auto bothers your eyes, let me fit you out with a pair of these My wife wants The Whip Hand. "That is a bright boy of your, old man." "He's all of that. I wish I could | manage his mother half as well as {he can." { ~Robert H. Witt. Out of Stock. Grace: "Bertha seems to have a {very poor color, to-day." | Stella: "Yes, poor dear. You can't {imagine the trouble she's having trying to get her favorite rouge." ~Gertrude Heller. | Our stock is always open 140 Wellington St Opp. Post Office for your inspection, Evenings by appointment. || Kmnear & d'Esterre Dr. Waugh 168 PRINCESS ST. DENTIST 1068 Wellington 8¢. Phone 256. ro BRICK, STONE, PLASTERING AND TILE SETTING DOUGLAS & McILQUHAM CONTRACTORS JOBBING WORK A SPECIALTY, PHONES 2367F---938W, 400 ALBERT STREET orb BLUE WILLOW DINNERWARE We carry this pattern in open stock, you can get any piece you want. The Complete 97 Piece Set Is Only $22.00 We have another set (made by {Johnson Brothers, England) called the . "GREYTON," a plain band and line. . {This is an exceptional bargain. 97 Pieces ........ $18.50 Crockery, China and Glassware Sarcasm Mrs. Hale: "Henry, dear, I'm go- ing to' the beauty specialist's this afternoon. Could you let me have twenty dollars?" Hale: "Hmm! Twenty dollars! Do you think that will be enough?" He's Earned It. "Young man,' roared the boss an- grily, "you're fired. Your jhfernal carelessness in drawing up our con- tract with the Smith-Jones Com- pany has cost this firm ten thousand dollars." a "Would you mind giving me a signed statement to that effect, Sir?" asked the culprit timidly. "What do you want a signed statement for?" "I'm going to see if I can't collect a commission from the Smith-Jones people." ~Felix F. Feist. All of us are as lazy as our cir- cumstances will p@emit, Wild Willies. 8 | Willie, with Pa's golfing sticks, S| Practiced several wicked licks. "These are much too long," said he, So he shortened two or three. . »- Stiaotte. If you find an open letter Which you think is not for yom, Still, it may be, so its better" To 'make sure and read it through. ==ieotee 8. Chappell. The Brut Brute! A' woman's voice, shrill and high pitched, rent the quiet night air. It was a cry for help; and it acted on me like an electric shock. Quick- ly, yet silently, I jumped over the this time more appre- ensively, guard he house. Then I igcreased -my in the op- posite direction, toward town and the movies! This was one time my wife would have to entertain her uneéxpested lady callers without me! : last of our Summer Shoes all reduc- clear--unusual values. Ross. dren's Patan Strap Slippers. 'Children's Sandals. ; Shoes for Boys and Girls. Women's 5 Fine Shoes i in all leathers. The Jingle-Jangle Counter. Silver's melted into bars; Ropes are made into cigars, '. =~Harry Benedict. . * * Don't ery, little lot, don't cry, Yow! be a fling station, by and by. --Haze! Brown. Counsel. 'Th' man wid a smile is th* wan yo'll lke--but iv th' man has dimples along wid it, luk out for 'm! Dimples isn't wan av th' proper anny red-blooded » . . Th' woman wid a smile an' dimples t'rown in fer good meas- ure, is the wan ye'll like. But iv ye know what's good fer ye, grab a batch av biscuits an' shtrike fer th' mountains. Dimples in a woman is wan av th' timtationest t'ings that ivor dis- turbed the peace av mortial man. ~--Padriac Daley. ingradients av man. PPP PPP TTR PROOOTRSEDS THE EDITOR'S GOSSIP SHOP We have received some let- ters from readers suggesting we ought to mentionsthat THE FUN SHOP plan be told to everybody. Tell all of your friends that THE FUN SHOP buys the best humor, In your letters to your friends not only tell them of THE FUN SHOP, but mail them several issues. Anybody who wishes a past FUN SHOP department to mail to a friend please communicate with the circulation department, includ- ing a self-addressed stamped envelope. PEPPER PPIPFPPIP RPE r re (I EZXXE REESE EX XK J -- Wretch! "At one time you told without Mrs. Tiff: me that you couldn't live me." Mr. Tiff: "How in thunder did I know that I couldn't live with you?" --K. A. Bisbee. Regular Union Prisoner. Judge: "You'll not have to serve any sentence. You are discharged for lack of evidence." Rastus: "Does Ah draw any pay fo' losing' mah time." --Mrs, Julius Price. Diagnosis, Blake: "You can say all you want to about absent-minded professors, but this Doctor Jones is the worst 1 ever saw." Drake: "What did he do?" Blake: "After asking to see my tongue, he reached out and felt its pulse," --Paul 8. Powers. The reason there are more mar- riages in summer than in winter is very simple-- Can'telope on ice. (Copyright 1024. Reproduction Forbidden.) Readers are requested to ntri- bute. All humor: eplfram (or humorous mottoes), jokes, anec~ dotes, poetry, burlesques, satires, and brignt sayings of children, must be original and unpublished. Ac- cepted material will be paid for at from $1.00 to $10.00 per contribution; from 25c. to $1.00 per line for poetry according to the character and value of the contribution, as determined by the Editor of "The Fun Shop." All manuscripts must be wsitten on one side of the per only, should bear name of this newspaper, and should be addressed to Fun Sho Headquarters, 110° West 40th Street, New York City. Unaccepted contri butions cannot be.returned. GANANOQUE Aug. 15.--Mrs. J. Lappan and Mrs. M. Lappan, and daughters, Lansdowne, were in Gananoque yes- terday in connection with the big chicken supper which will be held at Lansdowne next Wednesday. The supper will start at 5 o'clock. Bert Cockburn, Timmins, Ont., is 'the guegt of Ross Meggs. Wednesday afternoon was a busy and exciting one on the links. The approach and putting contest was won by Edward Taylor with Dr. Kinloch as runner-up. In the final for the president's shield between Dr. Bracken and Hubert Shortall, it was a very keenly contested battle, finally won by Hubert Shortall by the narrow margin of two up, the last hole deciding the question. As usual the ladies served afternoon tea, the hostesses being Mrs. L. 8. Barr and Mrs. H. W. Cooper. Mrs. Myles Wright, a patient in the General Hospital, as the result of a fractured skull, is reported as progressing very favorably, Miss Myrtle Shiels and Lenora Jackson have returned home after spending a few days in Toronto. Mr. and Mrs. Jack Shiels have re- turned to Fort William after spend- ing the past ten days here. They will spend a couple of days in Buf- talo with Mr. and Mrs. Fred Croz- ier en route. Charles O'Neill is spending his annual holiday in Montreal. Mr. and Mrs. R. BE. Robb and children, Evansville, Indiana, arriv- ed Tuesday evening to spend the next couple of weeks with Mrs. Robb's mother, Mrs. Nellie O'- Neill, on Tremont Park. They mot- ored up. Mrs. Janet Ro! mn is the guest of Mrs. Watts, * ne Henne," Anne Arbor, Mich, Miss Vivian Goodfriend has re- turned to New York, after spending the past few months here with her mother. ¥ Miss May Rogers, who has been the guest of Miss Eva Glover for the past\few weeks, has returned to her home in Montreal. Bos Moore and Vietor Smythe, East Orange, N.J., who have been spending the past few weeks here with friends, have returned home. Miss Florence Mercer Stewart, First street, have returned home. E. Hutchins, a former agent for the Grand Trunk Railway at Mal- lorytown, with Mrs. Hutchins and their daughter, Frances, were visit- Ing of Hiends fn fhe illnse last week. They now live in 'Ormstows, Que, PEPPER PPP EBT I OPO E PTY ning to have their effect. THIS IS LUCK Right in the midst of Good-Bye Days when everyone needs new SHOES for going away --this tremendous Midsummer Sale | Thousands of pairs--Men's Sport Oxfords, Ladies' Strap Shoes and Children's Shoes, too -- Black, Tan, Shoes--our entire stocks at prices that make them the biggest SHOE BARGAINS you've seen in a year or more. But the tremendous crowds each day are already begin- ' Sizes will break soon. Clearance and White Hurry | ALL NEXT WEEK than ever. All next week will be House Cleaning Week. We are go-. ing to clear out all the odd sizes, etc., at greater reductions DO NOT FAIL TO COME AND SEE 20% Discount off all Baggage Abernethy's Shoe Store TOWN OF DESERONTO Funeral of Late Mrs. Percy Watson--Bass Are Being Caught in Plenty. Deseronto, Aug.' 15.--The funer- al of the late Mrs. Percy Watson, (formerly Ada Blake) was held in the Methodist church at 3.30 p.m. on Wednesday, The church was fill- ed with sorrowing relatives and friends. Mrs. Richardson and Mrs. Dr. Boyce sang a duet, "Face to Face." The pulpit platform was banked 'with flowers testifying to the esteem in which the deceased had been held. Mrs. L. Stevens, Hay Bay, was present at the fun- eral. The marriage is reported of Miss Tina Richardecn, Napanee, to Dr. Maclaughlin, a well known dentist, also of Napanee. Mrs. Maclaughlin is a cousin of Miss Estella Davis, East Main street. Miss Vera Naylor, who has been under the doctor's care, suffering from shock, is able to be around again. Mrs. Wager and niece, motoring from Watertown, N.Y., called on Mrs. George Pearson, Thomas street east, on egday. Mr. and Mrs. E. Lawrenson and son Harry were week-end visitors with Mr. and Mrs. Percy Stover, Thomas street east, » The Misses Fannie and Minnie Stewarts, Rochester, N.Y., were in attendance at the of Mr. T. J. Naylor on We afternoon. Mr. and Mrs. Coates, Jr., and Mrs. holidays with his mother, Barle Detlor, Mis§ Mary Abrams, Y., is spending a vacation under the parental roof, College street. KINGSTON'S BIGGEST HOME FURNISHERS REED FURNITURE FORTHE Aue ar REID'S --ATTRACTIVE Why not Et Fen oF a eS Ghat. wil soi S0'heve specially dking Mivaniage of our RY. priced Reed Three Plot Sulles, a Ia opvered 11 Cretcunas or Tape Hammo Couches and JAMES REID THE LEADING UNDERTAKER. 'PHONE 147 FOR SERVICE. Mrs. College street. Rochester, N. Bass are still being caught in plenty. Strings of them are coming from the shore - of the Quinte. Bay of A FIRE AT MORTON. Bucket Brigade Got Busy snd Put Out Flames. Morton, Aug. 13 great many from here attended social on J. Chapman's lawn on Thursday even. ing. An enjoyable time was spent by old and young. Master Howard Martin has returned from Kingston hospital much improved in health. The remains of Charles Burtch was placed in the cemetery here Monday, A fire broke out in the blacksmith shop by A. R. Jacob. A bucket brigade bled and soon got it | Ader zontiol Miss Pearl York, who has been agara Falls, N.Y. rang on the sick list, is able to be around again. William Booth and friend, of Wingham, are visiting the former's parents, Mr. and Mrs. F. F. Booth. Miss Jennie Henderson, Kirkfield, is. spending the remainder of her vaca] tion here. William Taber and fam- ily, Chicago, at B, N. Henderson's. Miss Rqbena Gamble, Briar Hill, and Miss Bessie Somerville, Perth, at Helen Laming's. Mrs. Falios)y Kingston; Mrs. Kearney, Westport; Mr. and Mrs. Lawson, Brockville; Mrs. Young ahd daughter, Soperton," at the Misses Kearney's. J. McDon- ald, Smith's Falls, at J. N. Somer ville's; Miss Kelsey, Newboro, at J. Coon's; Miss L. Simpson. Toronto, William Tidd, Watertown, N.Y., at 8. BE. Willy. Hallburton, has received a tion to be acting inspector of auto. ; mobiles, He will be stationed st headquarters, Toronto, As inventors, most of us are pros nounced guecesses--tihat is in excuse making. 4 oo.