Daily British Whig (1850), 22 Nov 1924, p. 11

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PHONE 207. Plano and Voice and Sight Singing 'Phone 704 or 2072w THE DAILY BRITISH WHIG' "GOOD SPRUCE LUMBER is used for so many purposes it would be hard for us to enumerate them all here, but whafbver your needs may be along this line just give us the message and your wants will be attended to promptly... ALLAN LUMBER CO. Victoria Street. ' "Phone 1042. Kingston Music Studios Mr. H. Packer, A.T.O.M, Johnson, A.T.C.M. Mr, H. Hill Special free advantages to pupils. Rates on application, * Theory ' Violin, Junior and Kindergarten Plano .. Miss D. Modern methods. Pupils prepared for examination. Solid Brick House on Stone Foundation 7 rooms, 4 bedrooms, lights, gas, 8 piece bath, furnace, floor plugs, side entrance, porch, good cellar, garage-- good, deep lot with fruit trees--Stuart Street. For information please call at office. M. B. TRUMPOUR - 270 PRINCESS STREET il Egg, Stove and Chestnut ... ... .$16.00 per tons | Small Hard Coal ..........$12.50 per ton | Buckwheat ........ .......$ 9.00 perton | car Semi-Anthracite Smokeless, suitable for Range or Furnace, $12.00 per ton, delivered | SOWARDS COAL CO. Phone 155 UPTOWN OFFICE: McGALL'S CIGAR §TOBB, PHONE 811. EA ------ FINDLAY SPECIAL TORTOISE COOK Six Cooking Holes, Special Fire Box for . Wood... Another masterpiece in Tortoise .Cook construction. Large and roomy Fire Box for burning wood, and still retaining the advantages of round firepot for coal. Come in and see this excellent Range, Stevenson & Hunter TINSMITHS and PLUMBERS 83-87 PRINCESS 5T. rE ROAR Special Prices on Chesterfield Sets and Living Room Furniture t pice Chesterfield set, Marshall Crish- ions, best quality of Tapestry. Regular $175.00, for ...... ..........$135.00 'Living Room Tables in Oak, Walnut and ff} get my letters, which Agnes has pro- | mised to have ready for me, packed in | lots of fifty. }| think about, of course, you remember, TT 1] The Rubyiat Of BY H. C. WITWER a College Man > LETTERS OF A SON TO HIS | FATHER. IX. Hoorah College. Dear Pater: Well, dad, you will un- doubtedly be overjoyed to hear that I am once again "heart whole and fancy free" as Whoozis, the poet, says, Last evening I handed Cupid his passports, severing all diplomatic relations with the charming but slightly fickle Agnes Kimo. Alas and a lackaday for love's young dream, eh, pater? I am to call for our pledge of troth, to-wit, the en- gagement ring, tonight and will also - Having nothing elsg to pater, that-I had originally arranged to take up the holy bonds of matri- mony with Mystica, the, er of the above mentioned Agnes, and would have gone through with my part of it had it not been for you. In your night staged at the Hotel Egram. When I} called to escort my then fiancee to the annual classic, she boasted of a headache--the result of having stud- jed until 4 a.m. the previous morning. Pater, Agnes is not the first co-ed have heard complain sabout the small print in Snappy Stories. However, Ag- nes begged to be excused, adding that if 1 was really saturated with love for her, 1 would also remain at home-- that is, my own home. I said I would, so we had that all settled. About half past eight o'clock on this fateful evening, after I had paced the floor of my. room between 2900 and 4600 times, wondering how the tide of battle was going as the panting dan- cers wrestled back and forth on the polished floor, while thousands of Hoorah College and Goofy University adherents cheered them on (Rather a long sentence this, as the life-termer twitted the judge) I got a preinonition; pater, Something told me that I should ROBIRT MALONE head, entitled, Patrick letter at the time you spoke of disin- heriting me if I became a groom be- fore leaving college and opening up an office as a successful Bachelor of Arts. So reading between the lines and acting upon this suitable hint of yours, pater, I canceled all games I had sch- eduled with the young lady for there mainder of the season. As you jolly well know, pater, when I went around to get my ring Mystica refused to see me, but sent the costly bauble downstairs with her sister Ag- nes. The latter proved to be a vision of lovely femininity such as is rarely seen by any one but an opium fiend after his eighteenth pipe, so drying my tears I took from her the ring I had given Mystica and as there was no- where else to put it I hauled off and placed it on her own quivering finger-- thus becoming engaged to my whilom fiancee's sister. A bit crotic, eh, dad? Ibsenesque, what? Ah me and etc., here I am--er--un- attached again, pater, yet since the pul- chritudinous (Woof!) Agnes promised to be my bride seems but a couple of days ago. As a matfer of fact, that's all it is! And to think that five years from next Washirigton's Birthday 'we would have been married a wedk. So that you will not die in convul- sions from curiosity, pater, I will im- mediately relate the incidents of last night that led up to my now famous break with Agnes Kimo. As you know, I have gone in for the more manly athletics here with my usual enthusiasm, throating a nasty tenor on the Glee Club and shaking a vic- jous hoof on our dancing team. Well, last night the Intercollegiate Shimmy Contest with Goofy University was Nua DODD iB CUE E EA PILLS The author of "How to Kill an Oyster." .A goofy looking, long-haired, fat- Longfellow Goldstein. go at once to the Hotel Egram. So strong was the feeling that I grabbed my hat and coat and rushed out,of my room at once--stopping only to call at the house of a certain fascinating young lady with whom I have been trying out a Platonic fsiendship. 1 imploged her to accompany me to fhé shimmy' tournament, as I feared if I went alone I might be carried away by the excitement, and leap into the fray, thus cracking my vow to Agnes. I managed to gain my platonic friend's consent and as I had impressed ,upon her the necessity of speed, shé was back at my side in less than three hours in a dazzling decollete that dis- played her--er--utter pneumonia. Pater, I think it was then that it first struck me thdt I had been a trifle hasty in getting engaged to Agnes. A man should look around a bit and--but to continue, we reached the Hotel Egram and were pushing through the milling crowd to the danc- ing arena when a couple bumped vio- lently against us. I caught a whiff of a familiar perfume--Spearmint-- and I looked up square into the startled eyes of my fiancee, who was supposed to be home in bed with a headache! Ag- nes Kimo's face turned as crifiison as --er--$46.00 worth of catsup. > "What 'dre you doing here™ she gasped, 2 Vt are you doing here?" I gasp- ed. . "Who is this: woman?" she demand- ed, evading my question. "Who is this man?" I demanded, evading her question, With a shrug of her gleaming white shoulders, Agnes calmly turned and introduced her escort, a goofy-looking, fongshaired fathead entitled "Patrick Longfellow Goldstein." 1 recalled this fellow, pater, as the author of "How to Kill An Oyster," the poem which is al- leged to have inspired the Riisso-Jap- anese War. To digress a moment, I . | give it here from memory--thé poem, not the war, pater: 1 HOW TO KILL AN OYSTER. Don't drown him in vinegar > covér him at all ith nasty salt and pepper {F over, like a pall, Pe ut grab him by his shiney eye And hold your breath it with your eager, trembling, BL HON, I ares os ver BAD Eo mt {A a cr SE Ii Low, minister of trade and disregard for TRADE SITUATION LOOKS VERY HOPEFUL | According to Hon. T. A. Low-- A Buoyant Tendency ls Shown. . | ! Ottawa, Nov. 21.--"An examina- | tion of trade returns for the last } twelve months reveals a very hope- | ful situation," states Hon. T. A. com- | merce, in a statement issued to-day. "Canadian trade figures on Sep- tember 30th, at the conclusion of the first six months of the year, showed a much more buoyant tend- ancy than was the case a month earlier. The sharp decline that was the cause of much comment, when the August figures were made pub- lic, has given place to a substantial goods entering and leaving the do- 'minion."" Dealing with the export trade, Mr. Low states that September last was the best month the Dominion has { had in four years. "It is the depression in the im- port trade," the statement says, "during the early part of the year has resuiféd in the accumulation of a heavy handicap in this year's fig- ures up to date, as compared with last year's statistics, but with an upward movement now under way and an export trade that guarantees our buying for some time to come, much of this handicap should be made up before the close of the fiscal year at the end of next March. Kingston Markets , Friday, Nov. 31. Fruit. Bananas, dos.. .. Grapes, Cal, 1b .. Grapes, local, basket .. Oranges, doZ.. .. «+ «+ Lemons, dos. Apricots, Cal, 1b .. Prunes, Cal, 1b. Peaches, Hvap,, Apples, peck . Garden Carrots .. Potatoes, bag .. Potatoes, peck .. Cabbage, 1b. Unclassified. Sugar, granulated, Bd .. Sugar, yellow, Ib.. . wei vn ¥ Sugar, icing, Id. .... ..12% Flour, standard, cwt. ..$3.76 to $4 Rolled Oats Ib, ......connsvesassb Honey, 5-1b. pail .. esvenelh Honey, comb. . -se20 --- -- Fish, ivi+:30 to 40 os av ies »+39 ..48 to BB sess ades wall es «.90c to $1.00 esss235-t0 88 ..& tor 36 eres . Cod, . Fillets, Ib iva. sons a. Finnan Haddle, Ib, fresh 1b. Halibut, fresh, Kippers, pair.... Porch, 1b, .......00 Seassnss Pike, 1b. Salmon; Ib .. Fresh: Trout, salmon, 1b... White Fish veesss18 to 26 caenssd0 Produde. Butter, creamery, ™ ....38 to 40 Butter, dairy, 1b. ... Cheese, new, Ib. Cheese, old, ® .. Eggs, new lald, doz .. oe as ee Seats anc Poultry Beef: Steak, porterhouse, Ib.. ..30 to 31 Steak, round, Ib Boiling cuts, ®» .... . Stewing cuts, ®» .... .. .. Beef, western Beet, local, 1b Pork: (Loin, roasts, ® .. Shoulders, roasts,.. Hogs, live weight, cwt. Chaps, 1b. ......- Hogs, dressed, cwy, .... . Bacon, breakfast, ........38 to 32 Ham, smoked, ......c...0m.. 36 Lamb: Hinds, B.. i... Fronts, IM... .... so se sa anny Mutton, ¢hops, 1b. 7 .......50 to 26 Mutton, carcass ..... Poultry Fowl, Bb .. J... 00 Wid, 20 Chickens, D.... .. .. 26 to 30 -- Hay, Straw and Grains. Barley sqen Rnind ns ua T0,t0 75 Bran, ton'... ... «c0v..$37 to $28 Buckwheat, bus ... .....70¢ to 76c Hay, baled, ton ... . ...511 to $12 Hay, loose, on ........310 to $11 t > .«s+43 to 45 Middlings, ton. . .. .. ..334 to $36 Shorts, ton... .... .. ..339 to $30 Wheat, local. . .. ..$1.20 to $1.25 niin vissansss 16 Hides, Deacon each ..™.....51.00 Horse sae. 80.75 to $3.26 skins, fresh ..31.50 0 $1.75 Sheep ekk mb skins, fresh ..$1.50 (0™§1.76 ade ee eens saiasen ve 2ese88 ; . WB i.o. ov si28 LBP mre & + vi 3T to 30 improvement in the total value of |* i HEN the last animal has passed AX/ heongn the auction ring, whem every implement of the farm equipment has been sold, what thea? The vast majority of farm auction sales are conducted on a credit basis, but if the sale is to be counted a success a trained banking expert must pass judg- ment upon the soundness of all settle- ments. C dard Bank. | STANDARD BANK OF CANADA. KINGSTON BRANCH--J. F. Rowland, Manager of the Stan the a A] COUPONS We will cash your Victory Loan Coupons or place them to your credit in our Savings Bank where they will draw interest at 37 per annum. - THE CANADIAN BANK OF COMMERCE Capital Paid Up $20,000,000 Reserve Fund $20,000,000 F. E. Dench, Manager A Gift that Increases in Value Wm YOU GIVE LAST CHRISTMAS ? Toys for the kiddies--most of them broken by now. "Something useful" for the grown-ups--now worn out or forgotten. Cash to your employees-- appreciated but soon spent. Other presents--hurriedly bought and perhaps ill-chosen. Are they remembered now? . Suppose this year you give them each a Bank Book containing an initial deposit, and urge them to add to it regularly. Could anything be more suitable? Add * Royal Bank Pass Books" to your list Gifts. an are prom DB THOMAS' ECLE © reliev rna ieved CTRIC OIL GINSENG AND | RAW FURS We _l will buy any uantity and pay 10.00 | per pound for Ginseng | | mail. * We remit you. -

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