3 THE DAILY BRITISH WHIG Friday, August 6, 1926. 1 WHEN OUR JONPER WASNT UP 10 DATE amet Er a... By Crawf. Slack.) We're a curious composition, I guess the same world wide what what our cir- | we're never satisfied terest makes them fret, While others are not satisfied with out they are in debt, LY used to think if ever I got rich en- | ¢ ough to write, | A check in just four figures I'd con sider myself right, I got very near that mumber when | my bank book got a jar, i For my women folks got nagzing me to get a better car. | We owned a puddle-jumper, aor in | other words a "Ford" : i bought it second-handed and ag] all I could afford, t was no fancy showcase, nor was it ! worth a pile Not at all the latest model or up to] date and style, The Smiths and Browns and Jones | Then it started for the were trading in their cars, For those enclosed and classy glistened like the stars, I considered our old jumper wi 1 good enough for me, ] But Balinda and my daughter the thought different you see whizh | i When scheming Auto agents heard | that we would trade or buy, They swarmed around like hornets seemed to drop out of the sky They'd all kinds of enclosed buse painted in the latest shada, And the one thing most peculiar, wa they all were "Special" made Some had "Special" carburator some with "Special" vacuum tank, There were some with "Special start ers which you never had t« crank, There were some with "'Speefal" trimming in plushes drab and brown, But the "Special" of all sperals was when buying you paid down. The yard was filled with autos, ag- | ents representiing all, There were picture cards of autos, ng the windows on the wall, l, each - They were busy demonstrating ea forming the Cherniavsky trio pow "Special" make of car, touring Europe, met a tragic And were driving my Balinda and f Wednesday from lysol poisoning }a few minutes after he had her daughter near and far, The house work was negléoted and . the meals were always late, And I was nearly frantic by their au | t tomobile prate, I was doing all the house work cooking, dusting, cleaning | floors, | Why I scarcely got a minute to at-| tend to things out doors, So 1 flatly told Balinda she had be | gp ter make her pick, nd I'd rid the place of autos and thelr agents mighty quick. ¥ finally decided, pickiing one! the agent said, the famous Barney. O!dfield - was motleled and was made, Brerything about it "Special" and | distinctive in its class, } | Tt would shoot more miles per gallon | than all others on poor gas, } He sald the greatest feature "bout the car, and all its own, i as that it*was almost human, and would nearly run alone, f @ said he'd teach Balinda to adjust) it here and there, . That in less than half an hour she could drive it anywhere. : f ] To be equal with our neighbors and} be in the social swim, : Bl We owned a classy motor but my \! bank account was slim, ¥ Por I wrote my check in payment for half a thousand bones And had to go and borrow the same amount from Jones, SUPPLIES THERMOS BOTTLES THERMOS KITS WAXED PAPER PAPER OUPS CANADA DRY GINGER ALE 'GRAPE JUICE LIME JUICE L. T. BEST PRESCRIPTION DRUGGIST "Phone 59. We deliver ? | The agent taught my We'd She ¢ { But | When = | And in | Just | ar rible agony and had been rushed to | 256. {some time -- - | nghter and 'iugee Balinda how to have | News of England buildings 7 the } ? doing | loyd George and Ramsay Maec- donald wil] attend the Royal Nation- al Pisteddfod at Swansea in August The Earl of Stradbroke, ex-Gover- {nor of Vietoria, and Lady Stradbroke have arrived in London. conquered | Guild of Goldsmiths. . AY | Nearly 170 applications were re- ' ceived for the housing estaté mana- that | 3 : t | gership at Wealdstone med it . | she me lessons show | Henry Ray Keen, aged 63, was bow 10 Manage i | killed when he' tell from his machine 5 rent to demonstrate | While cycling downhill at Uxbridge | Five sons and six daughters at- het 3 but- | tended the funeral of Mrs. J. Shar- oming thing got gay | rett at Edlesborough, Bucks Sir George Coulthorpe is taking up other way, the Freedom of the City through the Then it snort like a broncho and | The King, accompanied by the took a plunge ahead, | Queen, opened the Royal Tourna- tore away the sheeting and {ment at Olympia on the afternoon of jumped out through the soed j July 8th It<galloped 'round t barnyard and | Mrs. Emily King, of Richborough tried to loop-the-loop, road, Westlake. on-Sea, recently cele It careened ag hog-pen and | brated her 100th birthday smashed hicken-coc The lower parts of Hull highway ge- | flooded recently by the rising of sub- | terranean waters following a heayy like a downpour of rain brought up against the gae The next British Fair will be held a streak of car and woman that |at the White City & 1epherd's Bush day there could be seen and at Castle Bromwich, from Febru- It seemed to be a "Special" kind of jary 24th to March 1st, next year earth and air machine. {| Bertram Hibbert, of Fallsbrook {road, Streatham, collapsed and diea ha in an L. C. €. tramcar at Tooting. The Bupeérmarine Aviation Works, ha Special" aboyt te ys or so, When Bal arnyard gave a re gt show, had it and cal', conclusion auto | posse she we ton th pla the of going forwards it; shot And ing at a fearful rate, and | But exploded canon When I got to wife Balinda she fainted at the wheel, But I saw at once the "Speclal} had | Southampton. have secured the con the worst end of the deal, [tract for a large flying boat for the When I saw wasn't injured 7! Danish Navy. carried her inside, | William Arthur Terry and Jean- And I went out in the woodshed and latte Harris were acquitted af Essex laughed until I eried y I have seen dare-devil cowboys do- ing tricks considered slick Balinda had them faded her automobile trick, Our old Lizzie wasn't st) h, but as fool-proof was complete, required no brains to manage ' you controlled her by your feet. We're a curious composition, same I guess world wide, No matter what our we're never sat she | Assizes on a charge of having stolen a boat from Southend A window presented by Mr. Ger- rard, American Ambassador at Ber- lin during the war, has been dedieat- ed in Westminster Abbey, in memory of Brit prisoners who died in Germany But with She the constructing 500 concrete houses at circymstance, | Eitham at a cost of £250,000. ied. | The death has occurred at Batley, | Yorkshire, of Lady Oldroyd, aged 78. [ wife of Sir Mark Oldroyd A Tragic Death. | During the financial year 1928 Toronto, Aug 6.--Gregor Cher-|there will be no training either vol- riaveky, brother of the musicians | untary or compulsory, for officers of the Militia. . Sir William Joynson-Hicks, Home Secretary, gives the number of aliens | deported from Britain in 1925 as death | been liscovered in a lane suffering ter: Councilor Thomas Parkington, of he hospital. Cherniavsky, who was | {2 violinist, had been in ill-health for: IPSWich, has presented Oakhall, Ips- { wich, as a home for veteran journal. ists or their dependents. The Liverpool cotton porters have decided to secede from the National James Union as a protest against the de- id's |claration of the general strike. I D'Angelo named as vendor, Frederick John Joseph © Parker, P lHnvor in jury verdict on baker, Kentish Town, has been ar- : vietims at Oakville. rested on a charge of stealing jewel. an a ---------------- | A Simmon's bel] spring and mat- ress, only on sale at were | he Woolwich Borough Council ds FLAPPER FANNY SAYS -- PROBS: --Saturday, fair and cool. | ©1928 BY nea SERVICE. nC mgr iin Some people could say what they think and still be quiet. A scoot apn ' lery valued at £1,500 from the De Vere Hotel Alexander Wylie, aged 50, an Ux- bridge caterer, dropped dead in-local ic Light Company's office. Miss Blanche Mayled and William Pittock, of Ardleigh, Conchester, were married on the golden wedding day of the bride's parents. of medical ¥: Cambridge, anied a party from Oxford, will sail for Canada on August 13th, The death | taken place at Ar- law ard Castle, of Rev, le, aged 76 bone Council has re- ceived permission to 'borrow £115,- 709 for extending the plant of their station. low, aged 53, who was Southall Park, suffer- has died in Ux- under- accom- party from small electricity George P found lying ing from poisoning, bridge Infirmary. Captain T. Bodley Scott, who has been elected Mayor of Dovery has re- signed as manager of Dover Harbor Board. The General Committee of the Royal Arsenal] Co-Operative Society, propose to grant £1,000 for the re- liet of distress among miners. A tablet over a bed endowed by Seylon residents, was' unveiled by Ormsby Gore, at the Hospital for Tropical Diseases, Greenwich. The South-east Ham Women's Co- Operative Guild have protested to the East Ham Education Committés" against teachers discussing politics in schools. { Lord Devonport recently laid the foundation stone of the new Nurses' Home at the Dreadnought Hospital, Greenwich, a memorial to the Mer- chant Service men. { - 1 EE a Treasure Island is Mecca for Children % SATURDAY $11 --$21.50 to $35.00 An Extraorc Promptly at 9 o'clock Saturday morning we place on sale this lot of" 100 beautiful, new Dresses that are positively $27.50 to $35.00 values. "Included are Georgette Crepes, Crepe Satin, Flat Crepes. 11.95 | These are New York Sample Dresses--absolutely new in style and all the wanted colors. -The sizes are 16 to 44. Positively the most remarkable Dress Sale Kingston has ever seen. Be early ! » ALL SALES FOR CASH. NO APPROVALS. a THESE TWO SENSATIONAL DRESS SALES WILL CROWD OUR DRESS DEPARTMENT TO THE LIMIT. SO WE STRONGLY ADVISE YOUR BEING HERE 7.95 ¥7.95 And yet another. Remarkable Saving 30 Only Pure Silk Striped Broadcloth . 50 only in the lot, sobe early. A wonderful range of stripes in almost every color you could imagine. The sizes are 16 to 40 and at the regular price of $18.50, these REGULAR $18.50 VALUES TO GO AT